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FAQ:
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><Random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out. This is something that cannot be explained. You either have learned to intuit this or you have not. If you have not, the only way to learn is experience--there are no shortcuts. So it comes back to: Just ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships.
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking.
>Brandon
Fuck off
Reposting this since I didn't realize the old thread hit the bump limit. Just giving an update on the girl I met at the Smash 4 tournament.
So update on this. We're talking and things are going well. One of my friends is helping me out. She didn't respond for an hour and he told me to wait the same time so I don't look desperate or like I was waiting for her to respond. I think this is going well. Later on, I'm going to ask her to hang out.
>>17044738
Reposting from previous thread since it hit bump limit.
Girl I'm currently with is pretty bad when it comes to responding to messages.
If she's currently online or waiting for a text from me (for example when we're going out that day), then she answers very fast. If neither case is true, then shepretty much doesn't answer at all, no matter how much time passes, until I write her when she's online. This makes me kind of angry, because when I do, I feel like one of those needy creeps who double- or triple-text when girls don't answer them.
How do I tell her about my concerns without sounding needy?
Do girls give a fuck about mild / minimal acne and redspots on face? Plz respond
>You're perfect
What did she mean by this?
>>17044923
Some of the might
I doubt most will give a shit
>>17044940
"Give me the dick."
>>17044958
But I already did
>>17044945
Thanks m8 , its my biggest insecurity
Girls:
I'm probing a girl and seeing if she likes me etc ya know the usual stuff.
Sometimes when I post kinda flirty things, like:
>talk about stuff, come into the topic of shyness since Im a shy person
>she says but you had no problem talking to me after the first time we met? you dont seem THAT shy
>I say just because im talking to someone doesnt mean I have no problem with it, fighting through shyness isnt that easy, but ofc it depends on your motivation and how much you like that person ;)
>she says "awh" to acknowledge it and then bomb me with questions about what its like to be shy
she changes the topic like that
sooo....is she changing the topic because shes not interested or something...?
she asks lots of counterquestions when we talk usually so I dont know how to tell
>>17044792
>qt girl working cashier at my local Walmart
>every time she checks me out there's some light flirting back and forth
>I've been meaning to get her number but every time I see her there's a huge line behind me and I don't want to get her in trouble
>I see her in my recommended friends list on Facebook
>we have numerous mutual friends
Should I send her a friend request?
A girl pushing her boyfriend to stop touching her when I'm near, wearing my hat, and surprise hugging me while we're out of sight from everyone is a pretty clear sign she's into me, right?
I've got to stop this but I don't know how, I'm always around her and can't get away without making this awkward for my team at work.
>>17044792
Bump
Females:
Trying to get this girl to allow me to teach her how to better use her powers. Problem is she went off to learn from some jackass. How do I seduce her to being my apprentice in the dark side. Pic related, it's me.
>>17045150
Explain how from your perspective, the Jedi are the evil ones.
How the Jedi blatantly allowed slavery, exercised huge control over the Senate from the sidelines, and brutally enforced whatever decision the Senate just so happend to come to, how they withheld massive amounts of vital information in their own personal library, and how they kidnapped toddlers from their homes and forced them into their unfeeling cult.
Explain how the dark side promotes personal freedom and growth. A celebration of passions and emotions, rather than a repression of it.
Or, you could go with your original plan of torturing her to find out where the rebel base is, and killing her if she doesn't comply.
This is kind of for both but I didn't want to make a new thread for it: Is it a bad idea to have a date at noon/afternoon as opposed to later?
>>17045003
Holy shit, you're an autist.
>>17045057
Better to send the friend request than to bother her at work, really.
>>17045084
Maybe, maybe not, we don't have the info to know. Maybe she just hates PDA. Just tell her to stop hugging you.
>>17045336
Not necessarily. It may be more complicated to schedule for that time since most people work during the day, but afternoon is more low pressure.
>>17045356
thanks, yah i just think of noon because it's ironically the time the girl and i would have free on weekdays
>>17045356
>Holy shit, you're an autist.
:(
GIRLS:
Would you ever date a trap/feminine guy?
GUYS:
Would you ever date a reverse trap/masculine woman?
I have this semi formal party coming up and you are supposed to bring a date. I know almost zero girls so I've been contemplating asking this girl that I have some history with to go with me. I'm reluctant because if things go poorly I'll have to see her all summer and that doesn't sound so fun
So ladies, how would you feel if a guy you had some history with asked you to a semiformal event out of nowhere?
>>17045374
What do you mean by masculine woman? Do you mean a tomboy, or a girl with a 6 inch bicep and stubble?
>>17045398
Well, lets say this then would you date
A: A female bodybuilder with a strong jaw
and/or
B: tomboy who looks like a teenaged boy
>>17045356
>>17045366
can you pls give advice and not just insult me :(
>>17044940
Either she's just wanting to say something nice to make you feel good because she likes you, she's infatuated and thinks you're literally perfect, or she thinks you're perfect for her.
>>17045003
She's not into you she thinks you're cute but in a 'aww my poor baby brother is so shy' cute. Hence why she changed topics when u started giving her wink emoticons.also why the fuck are you talking about your shyness like that. How is that probing. Dont make a big deal out of it
>>17045418
Neither.
>>17045418
I would definitely date the tomboy. The bodybuilder is a little off putting, (mostly because of the strong jaw) but I could do it if she had a good personality.
Is there such a thing as permanent tan? I am a brown guy and my face is much darker than my body, I used to be fairly white (pls no bully) about 10 years ago. Any way to reverse the process?
>>17045314
>Explain how from your perspective, the Jedi are the evil ones.
That's only something some faggot would say. I just believe that the Supreme Leader knows what's best for the Galaxy.
>>17045374
Girl, nah
>>17045374
As a penis, no.
>>17045418
No to both. I have the biggest boner for feminine /fit/ girls, but not for bodybuilders.
When is it okay to take a selfie with a girl you're dating? How do you ask her to take a selfie with you? "Hey let's take a selfie" is that okay??
Girls: This girl and I are pretty flirtatious with each other. She says I love you often, blows kisses, hugs me, and has also kissed me on the cheek.
She does this in a setting with a lot of people we know. They have started asking her if "we are a thing" or if we are dating. Today she told me about this and said that she tells them yes.
Is she sending a signal that, that is what she wants? Us in a relationship? Or is she sorta making it a joke?
I know it might seem super obvious that she likes me and with any other girl I'd be sure but she... I'm scared shes just playing around with me like a toy. I don't know. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
>>17045763
>Is she sending a signal that, that is what she wants?
>>17045840
Is she signaling that she would like a relationship?
>>17045854
Boy, you are one dense anon.
>>17045374
man i don't even know what you're asking
Females:
I got this friend with who I have sex with every now and then.
Last time we got close to having sex she asked if I'd stay for the night.
I said no, cause I had to play a latenight gig. She asked if I could atleast bring her to bed and cuddle up for a few minutes, so I lifted her up and brought her to bed. While there she asks if I'm sure that I closed the back door, I tell her I'll have a look. When I return to give her the cuddles she asked for, ⬆ notice she is partially naked and undressed herself while I was gone. She says: This ain't fair! I get the hint and undress myself partially too.
We start making out, stroke each other and so on, when all of a sudden she moves her feet across mine and asks: "Do you have flat feet?"
I reply: "Don't know, don't care"
She: "OMG you got flat feet! Hahahaha"
Me: "The fuck? Come here you"
She begins to laugh even louder and says: "I'm so sorry, you're so perfect and stuff and I finally found a flaw and a really cute one too!!"
Me puzzled as fuck: "Alright, how did we go from making out to discussing the shape of the bottom of my feet?"
She's still laughing uncontrollable and says: Oh man forget about it, Mr perfect's got a flaw.
I stay for 15 more minutes and head out to the gig. Had no sex in the end.
My question: What in the world kind of message did she tried to bring across? I don't get it why she was rofl'in IRL. And why did she want to find a flaw so desperately?
What do girls feel when someone gives them the fingerino?
>>17045921
>What in the world kind of message did she tried to bring across?
I think she was pleasantly surprised and found it cute.
>And why did she want to find a flaw so desperately?
If she thinks you're perfect, that will bring down her self-esteem. It sounds like she's into you romantically but is having issues with feeling "beneath you." Having found this minor flaw, you're now closer and she feels like she can relate to you as a human.
Somewhat turbulent relationship but we ended on friendly terms.
How do I get him as a fuckbuddy without him thinking I'm trying to manipulate him into being in a relationship again? I honestly do not want him as a romantic partner. I just wanna fug and thats all.
how do I git gud
t. virgin male
>>17045854
Nigga you dumb as hell
>>17045949
>How do I get him as a fuckbuddy without him thinking I'm trying to manipulate him into being in a relationship again? I honestly do not want him as a romantic partner. I just wanna fug and thats all.
It sounds like you were the one that ended things. Unless you're okay with hurting him, that's just not going to happen. You may be done with him on an emotional level but that doesn't mean he feels the same. FWBs don't work. FWBs using an ex? That's even more dicey.
>>17045932
Thanks for the reply. That would make sense.
>>17045957
Darn.
>>17045957
Well how can I at least get him to hook up with me, like just once or twice? I just have new moves I wanna show him. Cuz were still kinda friends and we talk still.
>>17044992
God dude I know, do you also have a greasy face? It sucks, all I can do is use oil absorbing sheets, and that only last for a couple of hours. But the acne went away for the most part, unless I'm really stressed then I get one or two big ones which feel like they stick out like a goiter. Past girlfriends didn't seem to mind too much but still, it's something that will always nag me, especially with new women. I'm 21 when will this end?
can anyone give me the breakdown on what it's like dating a girl with BPD?
>>17046021
How many girls are diagnosed with bpd? It's popped up more lately and the girl I'm talking to recently went to a psych and they brought up the idea she had bpd and my crazy brain goes "all these guys are talking to her and you're aren't going to get her"
How do I talk to a girl about my family issues without getting her involved in my shit?
Obviously i would ask if she's willing to listen first things first...but I don't want to make her obligated to fix my problems...i just need someone to talk to.
>>17045964
You're disgusting.
>>17045356
>Holy shit, you're an autist.
No, he's not. This guy >>17045763 is more like what you're looking for.
Or the guy (and maybe girl) from >>17044505:
>I met a girl on tinder who I talked to and played steam games with for weeks before finally meeting her.
>First date at a bar, talked for three hours, just got a hug at the end, which is okay.
>A couple days later I asked her out again for the following weekend.
>She said she couldn't go out but that I could come over and watch movies at her house while she did homework
>She never did any homework, but she sat on a recliner next to the couch instead of sitting on the couch with me.
>She's getting ready for bed, I get ready to leave, and she offers to let me stay the night.
>I accept, and she gives me blankets to sleep on the couch.
>be guy
>with girl crush
>light flirting turns into play fighting
>play fighting turns into her asking me to slap/punch her
>gets kinky
>she stops when things start to heat up
Happens every fucking time we get together.
WHY?
>>17046031
>How many girls are diagnosed with bpd?
Over their lifetimes, about 1% to 6% of girls (like all personality disorders, it varies a lot by region since the diagnostic criteria aren't strict, and by study since it's considered acceptable to play a bit of fast and loose with the numbers to explain away statistics they find inconvenient or irrelevant, eg gender discrepancies).
>>17046084
she probably doesn't want you to think she's an easy ho
>>17045763
Girl here. Sometimes we just do that shit. I would be more comfortable doing that with someone I have no romantic interests in then with someone I'm actually looking to pursue. Like someone I view as an extremely close friend.
Get over her already. She wasn't meant for you. You'll find someone better. You always do.
how do you ask out a girl who works at a fast food joint
Why are women losing more and more individuality? Is it that fun looking like Instagram "models" and dressing like tumblr bitches?
Is the real world as superficial as social media? Literally >10% of the women left in any given country are wife material. I might as well find a 16 year old and start shaping her into the woman I want her to be for the next 3 years before fucking her.
>>17046174
I honestly could say the same about white guys. They all look the same.
>>17046206
Well.. I was actually speaking about white women in general, so there ya go.
>>17046209
White women have been terrible. Literally bottom of the barrel, yuck.
>>17046213
I thought I could get around this by going with a foreign girl, but somehow she was even worse than an American one? It was such a toxic fucking relationship it almost turned me off women completely. I've dated women from many races and all walks of life and white girls are soulless as fuck
>>17046209
Stfu nigger
>>17045418
Are they natty?
>>17046209
White people in general are boring af
I'm a more naive, passive guy (with autism, but I try to handle that the best I can by itself). I know that it's not the greatest thing when it comes to social interactions with people, especially women i'm interested in, but I seem to always get lead on, and to the girl's surprise, I ask them out in the end/whatever and obviously get rejected, because all they want is a beta orbiter to release sexual stress/steam on or push around. I'm 20, never gf, and this is my third time being lead on, 5 other girls have just simply rejected me, which I far prefer. It's quite emotionally taxing to think that you're making progress with a woman who just seems somewhat dominant in her personality, and in reality, it was never going to go anywhere.
So, ladies, how would I make sure to come off as a person that won't tolerate being lead on? I don't want to come off as a dick.
>tfw spent 20 minutes typing my question just to come to the conclusion that every situation and person is different and no one will be able to choose better than myself
just be yourself :^)
>>17046236
what exactly do you mean "lead on"?
if you ask them on a date and they reject you, that should be the end of it - unless you actually like talking to them outside of a potential romantic context.
the girl i'm dating right now basically rejected me for 4 months - making up excuses of being "busy" everytime i asked her to do anything. at one point we hadn't even seen eachother for 3 months even though i walk past her apartment everyday on the way to my car at our university. but now we're dating so who knows whats gonna happen man life is weird.
>>17046247
They give me signs of attraction/flirt with me but immediately dismiss them style. I'm pretty sure it's to strengthen attraction in my mind while still trying to "friendzone" (i'd consider it more like the beta zone, in many cases)-and ah fuck it, I don't know how to explain it. A good female friend had a better explanation for it.
The last girl, the best way to put it, wanted to release social/romantic/stress without actually having to partake in a romantic or sexual relationship with me. She kind of had the personality of a bully and some other issues going on. She flirted with me, told me about her body/sex and nudged up against me frequently, but when I tried making a move it went south and I got a very flat, somewhat surprised rejection. I still talk with her somewhat frequently, a few times a month, but it just angers me. She did all that but put me down frequently at the same time; a confusing situation altogether.
Girl before that accidentally lead me on, I've no anger at her for that. Though it still sucked.
God I sound retarded
>want a gf
>think i'm too boring
>self improve
>get a job
>own a car
>live on my own
>get into hobbies like drawing/painting
>learn new language
>travel the world
>try and experience many new things
>improve my fashion sense
>get fit (not religiously)
>get better job
>improve my attitude
>still boring
>and ugly
>still no gf
At least I tried.
>>17046279
Read
Girls
a female friend of mine who i care about very much had a horrible day today. Well, she's sleeping right now, and I want to send her a nice message for when she wakes up. I was thinking of sending this-
"Good morning!! I wish that you have a great day today, smile please! :)
There is a lot I want to say, but to keep it short; I just want to let you know that I care. I don't know if you still like me the same as you did just a few months ago (you know what I mean), but you are still very special to me. and I support you and you know I will always have your back! You are important! :)
Don't get angry today ahah, be happy! I send you a big warm hug for you to start the day :) "
how would you feel if you got this waking up? We've been friends for about 8 months now. We used to be quiet flirty, and have even sexted a few times in the past. But things have changed a little bit, I'm not sure why. But i think it's because she has a lot on her mind. so I wanted to just send her a very kind, caring message
>>17046305
>"Good morning!! I wish that you have a great day today, smile please! :)
Just leave it at this line
>>17046305
>"Good morning!! I wish that you have a great day today, smile please! :)
>There is a lot I want to say, but to keep it short; I just want to let you know that I care. I don't know if you still like me the same as you did just a few months ago (you know what I mean), but you are still very special to me. and I support you and you know I will always have your back! You are important! :)
>Don't get angry today ahah, be happy! I send you a big warm hug for you to start the day :) "
Woah, slow down cowboy. The first line is fine, the rest makes it cringey
>>17046305
>how would you feel if you got this waking up?
It's sweet, but it would irritate the hell out of me. If I feel bad, I feel bad. I don't like being told to smile or to not feel bad, because that's not how emotions work. It also seems like you're using this bad situation to move in on her in her vulnerable state, and most people don't appreciate that kind of behavior. You come across as desperate and untrustworthy. Something short and to the point like, "I know things are tough right now, but you're a (insert whatever) person. You will get through this. If you need someone to talk to, I'm here."
>>17046316
I don't see how I'm trying to move her into a vulnerable state, or how I appear untrustworthy..
I respect her a lot, and have always been there for her. I'd never do anything to take advantage of her or wrong her
>>17046333
>I don't see how I'm trying to move her into a vulnerable state, or how I appear untrustworthy..
Not trying to move her into a vulnerable, trying to move in on her. As in, trying to hit on her while she's already in a bad state. That's sleazy behavior because it looks like you're trying to take advantage of her mental state.
>I respect her a lot, and have always been there for her. I'd never do anything to take advantage of her or wrong her
Okey dokey.
>>17046316
i agree with this, because you saying
>I don't know if you still like me the same as you did just a few months ago
is kind of taking away from the fact that shes sad and pointing it towards you, you're really implying that you just want to use her situation here and gain her trust or whatever and date her.
also, just saying shit like just smile!!! :) here a big ole hug!!! :) is really... not helpful at all.
you should actually give her real help regarding the subject, or say something with more.. substance. it sounds really forced and fake.
>>17046355
It's not forced and fake. And she would know this.
>>17046340
sleazy? Trying to hit on her?
I probably shouldn't have even asked this question in here. I don't know why I did.
>>17046371
>sleazy? Trying to hit on her?
You're clearly implying that you like her, making the situation about you rather than her and her situation. You say nothing of help or value.
>I probably shouldn't have even asked this question in here. I don't know why I did.
You wanted advice. As a woman, this is how I take it. If you don't want to use this advice and rethink how you go about things, that's fine. No one here cares.
>>17046384
I don't think my message is shit. I think she would appreciate it
>>17046231
every race and gender has their stereotyped look
asian males spike their hair with a shit ton of gel, and talk about how cool their modded honda is
white males wear a backwards baseball hat with a flat bill ( a team they don't follow, they just like the logo) and a white tee with some jordan shorts on (probably hasn't played organized basketball since middle school)
black males have that "swag look" some knock off true religions (or stolen) hanging off their ass, a hoodie with treads hanging down the back
mexican males have some weird mix of flannels or tank tops that apparently only mexican chicks dig
>>17046209
White women/people suck
White women have either terrible asses or unnatural gym asses that's going to go away as soon as they get lazy
White women age as bad as milk also
>>17046388
Tsk tsk. Rule 15 Pegasus.
Google search "Andrew Garfield beard".
That's how I grow mine.
Can that ever be attractive?
>>17046390
if you dont think it's shit, why did you ask?
>>17046390
Then do whatever you want, anon. You've known this girl for only 8 months, so clearly you know her inside and out.
>>17045964
lol
Ladies, is it weird that find girls who don't wear makeup or high heels to be more attractive? Yes, I understand makeup can do miracles but I think when it comes to dating someone I prefer to see what is under the makeup. As for the high heels, I just don't see the point. To me, it makes you walk in a weird way and it makes your feet hurt.
Am I just wrong in this? Do I just not understand?
>>17045470
Your face is thinner skinned (blood colouring it) and more exposed to sunlight so it'll be tanner than the rest of you.
The only way for the tan to go away is to wait for the tanned layers of skin to flake off. Try uncooking a steak, yeah? Only you're alive and have unexposed skin under the tanned skin
This means from now on wear sunscreen, a sunhat and avoid sun but take Vit D pills. Best wishes.
>>17045613
I'm not into photos so I'd be reluctant unless we went somewhere scenic that warrented taking a photo of us being there.
I probably wouldn't until we been out a few places
>>17045854
I think yes. I'd be pissed off that she told people you're a couple when you haven't even agreed or talked to about it though. Watch out.
>>17046465
>Am I just wrong in this? Do I just not understand?
Everyone has preferences, so there is no way to be wrong. But what you think of as "no makeup" is probably just natural makeup. It's very hard to tell, unless you're experienced with using it.
What do I talk to girls about? My hobbies are niche and my humor is off putting.
Also, what do I talk to guys about? In addition to the above reasons I don't watch sports and my social skills are awful.
How to ask girl out for a date?
>Out of the blue message
>Me: Hey, you down for ice cream on Friday?
>Her: Sure
>Me: Great, it's a date!
Is this okay? Or is it already implied that since we're going out for ice cream, that we are going out for a date?
>>17046512
I think "great, it's a date!" sounds like you're using 'date' as a colloquialism, rather that clarifying that it's a date
Girls:
I had sex earlier with my girlfriend, and while I was pounding her ready to finish, I start imagining this Latina girl that's in my sex dreams.
So basically, I'm fantasizing about a different girl while I'm having sex.
What does this mean? Is it bad if I keep doing it?
>>17046526
DUDE SEX LMAO
>>17045954
Practice and communication. Also get fit.
>>17046526
idk that's really depressing. do guys do this? what if my bf doesnt even find me attractive and thinks about demi lovato while fucking.
>>17046502
The couple female friends I've asked about this have all told me I don't understand. I'm just trying to get a broader range of responses.
You're probably right as I don't really know anything about makeup other than that I can tell (usually) when a woman isn't wearing any and when they are wearing all of their makeup.
Girls, why do a lot of girls find it unattractive when a guy plays video games?
>>17046532
that's no watermelon
>>17046526
I don't think it's bad just don't ever bring it up. That can hurt her feelings of she's sensitive.
>>17046550
I mean..I do occasionally. I'm sure girls do it as well
>>17046565
Absolutely won't tell her. That's just unnecessarily rude.
>>17046562
We don't. We find it unattractive when you do nothing but play video games.
>>17046550
I know I don't. Sounds like a rather shitty relationship.
>>17046400
Sounds like someone is upset.
>>17046021
Painful. Lots of shit tests, she'll be furious one night then act like nothing happened the morning after. I remember her lying to herself, and actually believing them after a while.
Stab her with a pike of lithium and run away.
>>17044921
O-or maybe a better question would be, how do I bump on /adv/ without sounding needy?
>>17044921
just try to chill.
if she is busy, she probably won't message you.
focus on how she is when she's with you rather than how she seems through text.
>>17046595
Believe it or not, it's actually a really good relationship. Just because one thing is off doesn't mean the whole thing is in ruins.
>>17046526
Doesn't mean anything unless it keeps happening and you're not attracted to your girlfriend. Doesn't have to be because of her looks- could be that she's not the sexually liberated partner that you fantasize about, etc. if you need to pretend she's someone she isn't in order to get it on, I suggest you lay off the porn or break up with her.
>>17046550
Most guys are just happy to be fucking, much less a celeb lookalike. Sometimes I fantasize about getting nailed by Tom Hiddleston, but I'm attracted to my bf and can just fine when having sex with him. I think it's only a problem when someone is imagining having sex with someone they know IRL.
Oh yeah... Demi Lovato... Blech
>>17046512
When you follow up with details, like where and when, it'll be clear that you're not delivering Ben & Jerry's to her place and then leaving
>>17046465
Nothing wrong with your preference, just like there's a wide range of how people apply makeup and walk in heels. but what I think is more important to you is that you're looking for a girl who's practical about fashion. So it may be that you don't mind a gal who wears makeup or heels, so long as she's practical. (I.e., doesn't spend tons of $ or time, doesn't sacrifice comfort, etc)
>>17046465
I honestly wouldn't notice, and if I did notice, I wouldn't care.
>>17046465
You're wrong in the idea that it's a fact that heels make your feet hurt. I've worn plenty of heels I found comfy all day every day.
>>17046406
Nope
Is it a red flag a guy won't answer a phone call from female friend while hanging out with me? We have been seeing each other for five weeks and are not exclusive although he has told me he isn't seeing anyone else.
He said that this girl was probably asking her to go drinking and he didn't want to so he didn't answer although he showed me the phone while it was ringing on silent.
I guess I should ask to be exclusive if this bothers me but it is kinda soon. Also I am scared he is fuckboy or what do you call them.
>>17046894
I'd say it was a good thing more than anything.
>>17046897
Why?
>>17046905
Because he's giving you his full attention. Pretty obvious, really
female human beans;
would you find it odd/creepy or whatever if a guy who you were brief friends with from 3 years ago on a holiday was to send you a facebook message out of the blue
>>17046909
Oh right. I have been cheated on and my ex did this too, was too afraid to answer the girls he was cheating on me with. So I guess that kind of scares me. But ex used to go call back outside but this guy didn't even do that.
>>17046913
No, not unless you basically had to stalk me to get my info, or unless there was some bad event that caused us to fall out of touch (i.e. If it was just because of geography/school schedules/whatever, then I'd prob be happy to reconnect)
>>17046916
Well I don't know what's going on, but like I said, it seems to be more good than bad. That said, if you're not exclusive, then he can do what he likes with other girls. If you don't want him to be with other girls, then ask him to be exclusive
>>17046925
the thing is i went on this ski trip in france with a group of people, I don't know if she was just being flirty with me out of politeness or if it was genuine. How can i know for sure
>>17046934
Well, try messaging her and say that you're not sure whether she remembers you, but you had a lot of fun on the trip, were glad to see her pop up on FB, wanted to connect. If you keep it lighthearted, you'll find out... Don't raise the stakes and create too much anxiety over it, though. If she's not interested, best to move on. Otherwise, it can be kinda creepy. :)
I'm feeling a bit down at the moment.
I've been seeing a guy for a few months but recently, he has been more distant, which is making me worry. I've tried speaking to him about it and he says everything is fine but I can't help but feel it's something more. It's hard to explain...there's no flirting, I've tried mentioning sex a few times and it has just been ignored.
How can I find out whether I'm being unreasonable or whether there's something behind this? I don't want to waste my time with somebody who isn't as interested in me as I am in them.
>>17046894
Obviously theres a chance he is seeing others and what you're thinking is right on the money
But my gut instinct as a guy says no, because thats what I'd be doing. If a guy friend calls me when Im hanging with a girl I tend to answer, coz yknow, bros. You got important shit to discuss
If a female friend calls, tend to text them telling them to talk later, coz I dont want the girl Im with thinking Im giving another girl more attention than her
>>17046966
Yeah and I don't want to be too suspicious. I'll just have an open mind and see where it goes. Thanks for advice ^^
>>17046894
He's ignoring others to spend more time with you. This is hardly a red flag.
>>17046952
I'm interpreting it as he's trying to deescalate the situation because he's not interested. I can't really say that for certain though, I'd really suggest talking to him face to face about what he wants so he can't just avoid the topic.
Ladies, what is the best way of rejecting (even that word sounds ugly) women when they are being actively pressured to pursue you (if that changes anything) without lying, being rude, or crass? Bonus points if you know how to get little old ladies to stop trying to play matchmaker.
>>17047020
This was my immediate response but whenever I've asked him about it, he tells me things are fine.
Perhaps I should just tell him outright what I'm feeling and see what he says. I don't see why he'd avoid the subject.
>>17047031
Just do it :)
>>17047025
You could just say that while you're flattered by the interest, that the chemistry isn't there... (Due to the circumstances of being pushed onto you or whatever- only need to say that if you think the girl will react very negatively)
To the matchmakers - say that while you appreciate their (hopefully) good intentions, that you prefer to discover your girl for yourself (blame it on being a romantic- maybe that'll shut them up)
>>17047087
Yeah, I've been trying to keep things as neutral and friendly as possible. The problem being that this is a work situation so there is a lot of regular interaction and I guess I'm seriously crush worthy. My lack of interest has led to some hurt feelings, I'm guessing there just isn't much I can do there.
I'm definitely going to try this approach to the matchmakers. It is a very different angle and I've tried a lot so far. Maybe this one will stick (old south east Asian ladies are persistent).
>>17045993
My ex did not care about my acne but im going on a date with this one girl whose realy cute and hope he does not care about it!
Girls, I have this concern that the way I dress might not "attract" the kind of girls that I like
My personal style is sort of inspired by pic related. I am very inspired by the Italian sartorial style, by icons like Marcello Mastroianni, Gianni Agnelli or Lino Ieluzzi. Maybe now, for the modest income I have (being 23 and having a very simple job as a waitress, plus some jobs as actor from time to time) I can't fully dress like this, but it's something I will get on.
So I pretty much dress in a very clean way. Slim fit dark jeans, Nice shirts, well fitting clean cut jean jackets and very well combed black hair.
But the thing is that i'm more attracted to girls from alternative scenes, than girls that could share a similarity in my "posh" looks.
Is this really a valid concern? or for the contrary, it doesn't mean jack shit? I go to a lot of rock bars, concerts, music festivals, shit that I like, and I usually fell that guys with messier hair, loose clothes and overall a more "urban" style are widely accepted than guys like me. It's like we're seen as some sort of bunch of wall-street fucking yuppies, and that of course concerns me
tl;dr: I don't feel much attractive to the girls I like because of the way I dress
>>17047164
>waitress
ugh sorry, meant as a waiter
>>17047168
Bit of a Freudian slip there, sissy?
>>17047188
English isn't my first language, and for some reason I was thinking about that line on The Human League's song "Don't you want me, baby?" when it says "You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, when I met you."
Girls,
Why are you so passive in dating and leave the responsibility of approaching/planning dates with you on men? Why do we have to always be the one doing all of the pursuing?
Hitting myself at the moment. I talked to a qt for about a week straight every day. When I asked her to come for a walk so I could get to know her she said yeah, but flaked.
She's in my class and stuff, hasn't even replied for 48hr.
If she ends up hitting me up in a few days or something how shouls I handle it? This is new to me
>>17047211
Girls could get into relationships so much easier and quicker if they put in even 1/10th of the effort that men do.
>but they'd be shitty relationships!
Says who? What makes guys who are assertive and actively pursuing you better as boyfriends? Nothing.
>>17047398
Also who says that if the girl shows some initiative, she can only date the passive guys?
She can still date those guys who are pursuing her but now she makes it easier for them and take a bit of weight off their backs.
When is it OK to ask for a kiss/sex?
My brain can't do it the "Natural" way due to prain broplems that are stuck with me until the day I die off.
>>17047404
We are of a common mind.
I just want to make it clear that I'm not saying girls need to accept or go for guys they're not attracted to or jump into relationships. I'm just sick of hearing girl friends of mine "this guy is so nice and we have such a good time and he's gorgeous! I hope he asks me out!" Bitch just ask him.
>>17047417
in a realtinoship? you don't really "ask". that's something that happens all on its own usually...
>>17047417
You don't ask. Not verbally. You push with physical cues. Go for a kiss when the time is right. Later, go for second base. Finally, go beyond that.
If she pulls away, stop.
>how will I know?!
Practice and experience. Everyone's awkward as fuck at first. Even after dating 6 girls I'm still not always sure when and when not to. Important part is not to push or to never try. The former is rapey and the latter is beta. Respect boundaries but be confident.
>>17047421
>in a realtinoship
On a date obviously.
Dysfasia and dyslexia are not exactly a nice combo to live with.
>>17047424
>You push with physical cues.
How to look for physical cues without looking like a freak?
>>17047434
It's near the end of the date: is she playing with her hair? Looking at your lips? Did she have fun?
It's easy to tell if a girl had a good time or not. If not, don't. If yes, go for it. Don't go for it on the first date unless it's really obvious cause that's risky and "too soon" for a lot of girls (understandable). But don't wait any longer than a 3rd date. Unless she's a mormon, she'll get bored of you not going for it and move on. She'll also only go on a 2nd or 3rd date with you if she's interested, so yeah.
>>17047443
>It's easy to tell
Not for me.
>>17047443
Also I'm a mid-20s male who's been on maybe a dozen dates. So femanons, feel free to correct me on anything.
>>17047211
That's how it traditionally works. Men have a more "active" role while girls have to be more "passive".
Not saying it is a good dynamic, but it is how it has always been.
Some guys even see a more active girl as "emasculating", "not feminine".
Most of my friends, anyway, do have a pretty active role, both in the first steps of the relationship (very flirty, upfront, suggest activities to do, etc) and in the long term (suggest dates, take initiative in bed, etc). Of course guys take more initiative and put more effort, but some dynamics are hard to ignore and pretty much all my friends said that the first step should be done by the guy.
>>17047448
Stop making excuses because you're scared of fucking up. We all fuck up. I was visibly shaking when I first chatted with a girl and asked for her number. I was also 22.
>>17047454
>scared of fucking up.
As a person who has a history of fuck ups after fuck ups, I can't help it.
>>17047448
It's REALLY not that hard.
Did she laugh? Compliment? Conversation was good? No awkward silence? Did she say she had fun? Is she pushing to stay out a bit more?
>>17047454
I have a constant feeling I am not allowed to screw up things, no matter what it is, or I get severely punished by extreme karma or some shit.
>>17047471
>constant feeling I am not allowed to screw up things
Sounds like a conscience, which everyone has.
>karma
Doesn't exist. The world doesn't owe you anything. Want a gf? Put in the work.
>>17047429
kek. mean.
why would you ASK for a kiss/sex on a DATE? you should really get yourself checked for high spectrum autism, anon...
>>17047475
How the fuck do I know she won't scream rape all of a sudden?
>>17047479
Because 99% of girls aren't crazy. Stop going on /pol/ and /b/.
>>17047363
She might have a good excuse, sometimes shit happens. But it she brushes it off and then does it again then you should probably be concerned
>>17047479
By not dating "high risk idiots" in the first place. If you are really autistic and need a verbal confirmayion of her approval to stick your meat inside her, ask if she really wants to do this. This can only be asked the first time you fuck if you don't want to be seen as a spergelord
I moved to a new city, other side of the country some time ago for work.
Since I got here, I've been by myself.
No friends, no girls...well I have collegues that are nice but..
So this weekend I am gonna go out and meet some fuckin' people!
>"I have a cool job"
Carry any potential?
>>17047496
>"I have a cool job"
You mean as a conversation starter?
>>17047498
Yeah..
Ofc its not gonna be the first thing I say.
But steer any conversation towards the >"what do you do?"
>"I have a cool job"
>"Nice tell me more"
(Paraphrased)
Girls:
So a bit of backstory first. I've always been a fitfag, both parents do sports daily and so do I, even though thanks to "good genes"(what my mother calls it), I don't have to do much in order to stay in good shape and not gain weight much even though I have periods of eating super unhealthy. This being said, fat girls are just the biggest turn off for me, I can't help it, don't wanna fathate or anything, for me personally the fat just look super disgusting and unhealthy.
Well, I've met this girl about 3 years ago. She was thin and fit and well we got together and are together still, now at the point that we will most probably move together in a couple of months.
Well the problem is that she started to gain weight to the point that she's starting to be fat. I've tried to motivate her to start exercising etc. but with no real outcome.
Don't get me wrong, I love this girl and will marry her even though she would get really fat (I guess), but for my personal satisfaction I would rather see her being fit. Sex life is also starting to be shitty as now I sometimes have to imagine what she looked like before when I want to cum, otherwise I just don't find her that sexually attractive to cum for her.
Moreover if I ever want to have children with her, I want to keep the genotype clean of all the gluten and other shit so my kids won't have to fight obesity from the age of 5.
I figured out that she needs somehow her own motivation, instead of my now-and-then suggestions that she should get back in shape.
So,
TL;DR How do you motivate yourself to get into shape and not being a lazy couch-potato? Can a boyfriend be a motivator in this, or would you be rather mad at him for trying to get you into shape? Thanks for any advice.
>>17046236
>I'm a more naive, passive guy (with autism
>So, ladies, how would I make sure to come off as a person that won't tolerate being lead on?
One possible answer would be to work on developing certain compulsive attributes, because they quickly and strongly repel those with significant sociopathic (all cluster-B) traits, like the girls you're describing. However, the autism makes this a terrible idea: not only are you already very susceptible to developing OCD and OCPD, it would kill what seems to be most of your romantic life, and make it more difficult to make friends. Long story short, the things that repel those girls will also repel most "normal" people, because most sociopathic attributes, thoughts, behaviors, etc are merely exaggerated version of normal ones (this is most obvious when you look at schoolkids and their behavior towards each other).
Better stay as you are (naive, assume good intentions, don't overthink). Better for your social development in the long term, even though it opens you up to more manipulation and possibly abuse.
>>17046276
We know what you mean. People often refer to all that stuff as "sociopathic behavior" in general. And it's great that you have a close female friend: she can help you learn to recognize it.
>>17047508
Ultimately it's up to her over anyone else, if she's decided that she doesn't want to keep fit there isn't going to be anything you can do. You can encourage her but if you start to push it then you start to become controlling. If she decides to keep being unhealthy then the decision is with you to either stick with her or break up with her over this.
>I want to keep the genotype clean
You don't pass down fat in your genes you tit
>>17047211
Evolutionary psychology
>>17047496
I was in a similar position once in my life and also struggled to find new friends for some time.
I've tried to talk to random people in bar that looked nice, but usually it ended up as it started. We had a small talk and they'd move on, leaving me alone at the bar.
So I've lurked a lot around the internetz and found out that you can actually make yourself more interesting and fun-to-talk-to by following certain psychological patterns when speaking to someone. This actually helped me to make more friends and "acquaintances", that I've ever had before.
Sadly, I don't remember much of it nowadays, that I don't have to use this mindfuck anymore and frankly speaking I would need a lot of time to write everything down here, but I am sure that if you'll google a bit, you'll find it easily.
One of the core things here was the power of questions. Right questions in right time, everything being much more elaborated and explained than what I am writing here, but overall:
Don't speak too much about yourself when not being asked, people don't like that very much. Instead try to listen to what they are saying and question them about that. People love talking about themselves and even more when somebody shows interest. The typical discussion should go like this:
> You: Hey what's up? (or whatever discussion starter would you use)
> B: Not much just hanging around with my friends.
> You: Oh nice, are you from around here?
> B: Nah, I am just visiting a friend..
> You: Oh really, and where are you from?
> b: blah blah
> You: Wow I've never been there, do you like the life there?
> B: blah blah blah
> You: That's awesome. I always wanted to visit that place, can you do [insert interest] there?
>B: Not really, I don't like that very much.
> You: Oh I see, and what do you like?
.....
Always show interest even though it seems boring for you at first. This way I've made a lot of friends in one night and then separate those which I really found interesting. GL HF
>>17047417
>kiss
You should be physically close, naturally face to face. Move even closer to her face as if to tease or dare her.
If she doesn't back away you can tilt your head a bit and lean towards her lips slowly. Usually the girl will cover the remaining distance and kiss you at that point, but if she's shy and/or inexperienced she'll just wait for you to kiss her.
In a nutshell: it's okay to kiss her if you can keep close to her face for a while without her backing away.
>sex
I think it's a lot more acceptable to ask for sex since girls tend to value consent a lot nowadays for some reason. In reality you may just be awkward but you can make it seem like you care about her and want to make sure she really wants it.
>>17045881
>>17045955
Are you saying it's obvious? Because again, with any other girl I'd be sure, but, I fear shes just playing games (a tease).
>>17046078
How am I an autist? See >>17046145
and >>17046145
We are familiar with each other but not even close to "extremely close friends." And are you at least explicit in the fact that it's a joke? Because otherwise, it's really shitty to play with a guy like that.
For girls:
Say you're on tinder and you see a guy you know, you're kinda friends but not close or anything. Would you 'like' him there, maybe just to be friendly or as a joke kind of thing as a laugh or only if you found him attractive/liked him?
It happened to me but I'm not sure what she thinks of me. It's been a while and we've messaged on there but idk.
>>17046313 >>17046315 >>17046316 >>17046340 >>17046355 >>17046384
>mfw
y'all aren't emotionally stunted, you're emotional midgets. And that's coming from a fucking schizoid.
forget balls, y'all need to grow a pair of ovaries.
Femanons,
How would I convince my girlfriend of almost two years to to start using birth control?
I tried in the early stages of our relationship to get her to consider using the pill, the copper implant, etc but she wouldn't consider it due to her fear of having not used contraception before and any side-effects.
Condoms are a nightmare for me to use and I really want her to be able to enjoy sex as much as I do.
What do you suggest?
>>17047594
Explain to her that it'd be much better for you, and eventually for her. Insist on the fact that they usually don't have major side effects and make her talk to a doctor if she has any doubts about it.
Just be calm, understanding and loving, but firm about it.
guys...
i was procrastinating the shit out of my life yesterday (i'm on vacation) and didn't even bother to get up and get my phone to text back the bf. (we texted earlier, but he was already asleep when i finally went to get it). and today i slept in late and didn't text good morning. i feel like he's being passive agressive about this. how do i save myself?
>>17047508
>I want to keep the genotype clean of all the gluten and other shit so my kids won't have to fight obesity from the age of 5.
Don't worry about that, it won't help. DNA itself is identical anyway (the DNA she'll pass on in her eggs was determined even before she was born), and the epigenetic configuration of metabolism is nightmarishly complex: involves multiple generations (not only you and her, but your parents and grandparents as well) and we're a long ways away from even being able to decide whether a certain condition is positive or negative (eg, if grandma lived through a famine year at age 6, does that make granddaughter statistically skinnier or fatter? -- there's usually multiple, opposite answers in different test groups/demographics and plenty of room for debate).
It's unlikely to make the difference anyway: feed and raise em right and they'll be fine. As for her passing on poor willpower and/or laziness? Well, that's one you'll have to figure out on your own.
>I figured out that she needs somehow her own motivation, instead of my now-and-then suggestions that she should get back in shape.
Your suggestions probably help, many people end up losing weight for others rather than themselves (they personally don't give a damn if they're 300lbs, but someone they're interested in does).
>>17047594
So either she uses birth control and she's uncomfortable or you use it and you're uncomfortable.
Also the copper implant is pretty good, almost no side effects
Femanons, im going to lose my Virginity nextvweek, and want to know something getting in. (Side note we both frequently masterbate so I have no worries about that part)
How do I eat pussy?
So Iwas dating a friend. But I havent said anything he was convinced I just wanted som fuk. I told him I want more when he said he was interested in some chick that he probably wont get to date but might fuck. Hes reaction was sorta positive but since I was hurt I stopped initiating convos and ignored him a bit in group chats. Now hes acting like a complete tsundere, aggressively helping me but its like nothing changed between us. Im not sure when Im going to see him again since hes busy.
Should I wait for his move? Do you guys think hes going to make one? Should I say/do something instead? I care a lot about him.
>>17045374
Girl here. Wish I had a qt trap boyfriend.
>>17047602
Confront him about it directly. You may have hurt his feelings by not texting him, but being passive aggressive about it is a jerk move on his part. I'd apologize for not getting back to him, but explain your situation and tell him that if he's upset with you then he ought to talk to you. Me and my girlfriend are busy people and we're pretty understanding about that, but it really can sting sometimes if you aren't getting contact when you seek it out. Tell him you didn't mean anything by it, and give each other some textual TLC after you both learn a lesson.
>>17047661
I'm a guy, but this really upped my game. Particularly the big, long licks
>>17047575
>How am I an autist? See >>17046145
You described the situation in classic autistic fashion, as an 3rd-party observer with zero inside knowledge of the situation, despite the fact that you're one of the subjects in question.
Let's say you had observed this situation from a distance and wanted to know what was going on. Just have to replace the pronouns in your post:
>Girls: This girl and this dude are pretty flirtatious with each other. She says I love you often, blows kisses, hugs him, and has also kissed him on the cheek.
>She does this in a setting with a lot of people we know. They have started asking her if "they are a thing" or if they are dating. Today she told me about this and said that she tells them yes.
>Is she sending a signal that, that is what she wants? Them in a relationship? Or is she sorta making it a joke?
This question ("Are Bobby and Suzie a couple, or is Suzie just joking when she says that?") would make some sense to ask a bunch of strangers on the internet, since they'd have as much knowledge as you (none) about the actual relationship between Bobby and Suzie, but might has some insight/tips or personal experiences to share.
Someone could reasonably answer by saying "I don't know, go ask Bobby".
The problem is that you're Bobby.
Basically, her behavior is beyond your comprehension, and since it's not even remotely subtle ("i love you", "anon and i are together"), something is wrong with this situation. Either you have a diminished ability to distinguish between a non-serious (joke, sarcasm, etc) and a serious statement, or she has a heightened ability to spin you in circles until you don't know whether you have a girlfriend or not (or whether she's serious when she says "i love you").
So maybe you're not autistic, maybe she's just sociopathic or insane and could do this to any guy. Hard to tell over the internet.
>>17047602
Take a selfie with a picturesque scene behind you and include the caption "wish you were here."
I hate vacations in relationships. Either someone's pissy that they aren't getting enough attention or someone's pissy that they're getting too much attention. Or both!
>>17047661
>>17047701
Also: another one
>>17047703
ho, i meant i'm on a break. i don't have to work. thats why i'm so fucking lazy. might have used the wrong word. english isn't my first language...
>>17047701
thank you so much! i'll do that!
>>17047708
Obviously it isn't because you misunderstood what I'm saying.
The problem in your relationship is the first one, not the second one I listed. You didn't say you were upset. He did.
>>17047714
Oh and not that I have any authority in the matter, but I don't actually agree with the communication idea. You're on vacation right now. You cannot interrupt every special opportunity in your life the moment your boyfriend starts getting insecure. This is setting a bad precedent. You need to be able to do your own shit while he waits patiently sometimes.
I also think he might find it hard to believe that you were too lazy to even look at your phone before, but now suddenly you have all the time and energy to tell him how to communicate with you better.
I like communication but I think this conversation should be saved until you're back at home and can talk in person. Just my two cents.
reposting from /soc/
be honest with me.
when girls are like "i dont care if his dick is 5 in" or "big dicks hurt"
they are just saying that to make me feel better. Right? No one wants a tiny dick loser like me. They just say that because they dont want to hurt my feelings. But I know people want big things.
Honestly, tell me, would you prefer to suck the tiny dick or the big one. The big one obviously
>>17047721
I agree with this as well, anon. I was sort of just giving the more general advice that came to my mind. Emphasizing patience is definitely a good idea. I just know that between me and my girlfriend, explaining the reason that we couldn't talk ("Sorry, was in a meeting!" "Had to run all of a sudden." "Was getting dinner with my friend." etc) is helpful and keeps people feeling valued.
>>17047725
5 inches really isn't tiny, anon. Chill out.
>>17047594
>due to her fear of having not used contraception before and any side-effects.
If she hasn't used any before, she shouldn't be afraid of the side effects. If she tries the pill and they're bad, that's fine, you can just go back to condoms.
None are dangerous enough to make it not worth trying.
>>17047602
>>17047701
>>17047728
Personally when someone doesn't respond i just assume it's accidental (work, class, bad reception, fell asleep, app out of date, absent-mindedness, left phone somewhere, out of battery, in the shower, message got stolen by the bit burglars/eaten by the void, visit from party van, social anxiety, interference from HAARP, "error: something went wrong", plain bad luck, ...)
From what i've read here, to everyone else it's a serious relationship problem, passive-aggressive behavior, all kinds of bad. Wouldn't it be more... zen to just not read anything into it (so to speak)? Or is that just me?
>>17047794
Nah I see what you mean. To me, it's not that big a deal, but my girlfriend seems to get upset with it and so I just let her do her thing. She'll be like "Ah I'm so sorry I was in the shower!" and I'm just like "Ok."
At the same time, sometimes you need a little support during the day or really miss someone, so sometimes those waiting periods between texts can get a little achy. It depends on the people. I just usually prefer to err on the side of sensitivity so that these issues don't build up or lead to other things down the road. Preventative maintenance.
Might not be the right thread for this, but I only got weird /pol/ bullshit in my original thread, so here goes:
Does anyone else here have trouble cumming? I'm a guy and I can't seem to cum with my girlfriend at all. I'm not sure if it's death grip syndrome since I'm usually pretty gentle with myself, but I wonder if my positions and grips have been so specific that it's having an effect. I've tried not masturbating for 2 weeks at a time and all it did was give me blue balls which made it harder to cum. Everyone's been telling me it's mental too, but I'm relaxed and fully in the moment. She's given me handjobs and blowjobs, and every time I've gotten sooo close but I just can't seal the deal.
Has anyone here beat this issue? Please, I'm upset and scared that I'll never cum with my girlfriend and that it'll hurt our relationship. Yesterday she broke down in tears worrying that I couldn't finish because she's not attractive to me or enough for me. I love this girl. I wouldn't care if my dick never worked again, so long as it worked for her.
to girls:
A week ago I traveled for 3 hours with 3 random girls. We talked about dating sites and one of those girls said that she had a fake profile of a guy - handsome alpha, just to try how many girls can she pull. I said that she should try out another fake profile with just average joe, like some warehouse worker, slightly balding, chill and slightly shy bloke. I added that I'm sure she would score 0 dates. All girls confirmed that such guy would be below their legue (all of them werent really pretty or smart to begin with)
So the question is: If you had a dating profile will you agree to a date with the guy described?
do any kind femanons want talk about craving cock or pussy so i can fap? i offer a digital painting i did
>>17047840
inablity to cum is a form of impotence (often overlooked because you are getting hard and girl can still cum)
seek professional help
>>17047725
>No one wants a tiny dick loser like me
>But I know people want big things
To quote Rip: Big wallets. Stop wasting your time obsessing over shit you can't change. Even if you grew a 12 inch cock tomorrow, you would still be a loser. Go do something productive.
>>17047840
Just to make sure, do you mean you can't orgasm, ejaculate, or both?
Do you drink, smoke, take any drugs?
On any medications? Sleep-deprived?
You mentioned you masturbate. Can you orgasm and/or ejaculate like that, but just not with your girlfriend?
>Yesterday she broke down in tears worrying that I couldn't finish because she's not attractive to me or enough for me.
Damn. You're probably already reassuring her it's not your fault, keep it up. Make sure she knows you enjoy it even without the money shot.
>>17047794
I'm exactly the same. Things have to be really bad for me to genuinely worry that someone hasn't replied. It blows my mind that people play games with something like this, it just seems so insignificant.
>>17047883
Got some appointments lined up. Here's hoping.
>Just to make sure, do you mean you can't orgasm, ejaculate, or both?
My dick feels great, and it feels like it's at the top of the "hill", but I can't get over the hill and feel a release or have an actual release of cum
>Do you drink, smoke, take any drugs?
I drink fairly often but not to excess, and I smoke weed very occasionally. Ironically I'm my hardest and horniest when I'm high. I also still had these problems before I started drinking and smoking more often.
>On any medications? Sleep-deprived?
No meds, and I think I sleep pretty well. I usually get 7 to 8 hours, or 5 or 6 if I'm really pushing it but I hate doing that.
>You mentioned you masturbate. Can you orgasm and/or ejaculate like that, but just not with your girlfriend?
Yes. I use some weird positions and techniques and I'm trying to unlearn them. It might just be bad habits.
>You're probably already reassuring her it's not your fault, keep it up. Make sure she knows you enjoy it even without the money shot.
Yup. We had a looong talk and I think I really got through to her. I'll definitely keep it up as well. She's beautiful and wonderful. It's not her fault. It's mine. I don't care about the money shot by this point, I just want her happy. Whenever something crosses over into the "Girlfriend is crying" threshold, we got a real fucking problem here.
>>17047883
>>17047905
Forgot to quote. Dumb.
How do you punish yourself for being dumb?
I eat tons of carbs to punish myself if I do something bad, efficiently setting my diet back abit
Why don't girls approach me at college class or gym?
I thought maybe I was really ugly, but people told me im not. Apparently I have 7-8/10 looks.
Maybe I have male bitch face?
>>17047946
7-8 might as well be 5.
Unless you are at least 9 it's just not going to happen .
>>17047704
Thanks man
>>17047946
Girls, and people in general, probably wouldn't want to approach in those settings. It's better to seek out that kind of attention in more romantic or open places like bars or parties or friendly get-togethers.
>>17047950
You got it. Good luck.
>>17047948
I was starting to think you need to be male model tier lol
>>17047952
Oh, didnt think of that...I dont have time for that stuff since im so busy with work and school.
>>17047905
>Yes. I use some weird positions and techniques and I'm trying to unlearn them. It might just be bad habits.
Yeah, that's a problem. Probably THE problem, really (exceptions could be if you had some kind of defect or dependency that would screw up your orgasm without certain pressure patterns (happens with retrograde ejaculation: iirc some taoist or something monks do this to themselves on purpose to prevent losing the "Qi" through orgasm).
Is it the physical technique or the porn that makes the difference?
Physical cause is easy to fix since you can just figure out with your GF what exactly is doing it for you and how she can do it (possibly even with her vagina, can apply pressure in all kinds of ways with enough practice). Can do it step by step too, with you finishing with your hand at first, then slowly giving her the reins. If it's the porn: minor kinks you can bring into bed, if it's not that kind of kink then you may need a sex therapist.
>>17047946
What country? In most, girls don't approach guys, period.
In some, they do, just not in class or gym.
>>17047932
Sounds like a good way to develop an eating disorder.
I think guilt, shame, anxiety, and self-loathing are enough punishment for most people.
>>17047971
Never attribute malice to something that can more easily be attributed to shyness or awkwardness or stupidity. I understand being busy, but make sure you can find some time to unwind and socialize. It'll do a world of good.
>>17047972
usa
>>17047976
I exercise in my free time(gym and golf), since i sit both at work and school. Other than that free time means working on a simple 2d game, a website or two and possibly an app(once i figure out what i want it to do) to throw on my resume for graduation next year.
>>17047985
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, anon.
>>17047972
>Probably THE problem,
Yeah. God, I hope so.
>Is it the physical technique or the porn that makes the difference?
I think it's the technique, and the dirty talk. I do like a certain type of porn that I'm not quite ready to share with her just yet, I frequently get myself to come with certain phrases or thoughts, etc. Plus just some weird clenching and bending shit I do. It's not something that anyone could replicate, so I have to snap out of it. I (unfortunately) learned to first masturbate by just squeezing my legs and it took forever to transition to hands. Now I sometimes squeeze my legs AND use my hands. I have to just get to the point that I can cum with just my hands while totally relaxed.
We're working on getting kinkier too. It's mostly just breaking down that barrier of embarrassment. We're both pretty new to this and are kind of guarded about it.
>>17047725
Big dicks do hurt sometimes if they'll long enough to hit the cervex (or whatever it's called?)
And 5 inches is about average anyway
>>17047932
Don't punish yourself, reward the good
But not with very unhealthy things
>>17047932
Don't use food as anything other than nourishment. It's not a reward or a punishment. Most people use carbs as a reward / soothing element anyway, not as a punishment
>>17047691
pls respond
>>17047972
>guilt, shame, anxiety, and self-loathing are enough punishment for most people.
PREACH
>>17044792
Does it hurt when you sit on your balls all day?
>>17047880
Could I make money of this?
the bf wants anal, i wanna give it to him
but how in the fuck am i supposed to take a dick when taking a simple dump can tear my turd cutter? two fingers, rip. warming up with one finger and then going to two, rip. i'd like to take a dick without pooping blood afterwards
>>17048184
Nah
Do women like guys who play guitar, badly?
I'm still quite new to guitar. Will I be successful serenading a girl with sub par skills? Do women date men just because he can somewhat play?
I never expose my hobbies to women because some anons say mystery is key to getting women but I aint getting any
>>17048187
Lots of lube.
>>17048199
There are some girls who only need to hear you to say you play. But don't learn for girls, learn for yourself because it's much more rewarding and they'll come anyway
Are there any Asian-American girls in the thread right now?
I'm a white guy in my late '20s, and I've recently found myself in an environment where most of the attractive women I interact with are Asian. I'm anything but a "yellow fever" guy, but I know that the whole "Asian fetish white guy" thing has been a real trend in the general consciousness lately, and I've been kind of nervous about making any kind of advances for fear of being perceived as one of those guys.
Are there any dos and don'ts, red flags, or anything like that that you guys can share? I've heard stories of guys coming up and gushing about "oriental beauty" and stuff like that, and obviously I'm not going to do anything along those lines, but I'm interested in whatever input you might feel like giving.
Girls. You know how sometimes a guy will ask you to talk to a friend of yours he's interested in, to gauge interest, or to sort of "inception" the idea of her dating him?
How do these things normally go?
Asking because I'm interested in a girl, and a mutual friend has known her for years and wants to help me by talking to her, being a sort of match maker in a way, because I can't really figure out what that girl is thinking, and I'm a bit socially awkward. (Already asked her out and got a vague "I'll tell you when i'm free" answer).
Thing is that girl is (according to our friend) weird, complicated, and she has to do it very slowly and carefully otherwise the girl is gonna clam up and refuse to talk. It's been days now.
Am I just in for some complicated situation that i should give up on? And is it always so complicated to have a mutual friend add her grain of salt? I'm mostly asking for future reference and general curiosity.
Girls: how do you get your hair to stay in place?
Would like to do some more advanced "italian model" styles, but i've been walking everywhere here and nothing i have will save it from bumps, wind, metro, etc. Anything that'll hold and still let someone run their fingers through it?
>>17047211
Fuck
off
Plan dates and approach? I fucking wish my boyfriend would even talk to me on his own. I get it, guys don't like to text, he's a silent type, yadda yadda, gotta be understanding, whatever. He won't initiate SEX on his own. Yet, he ''really loves me''.
Fucking doesn't feel like it. I guess I could use some advice on this, talking about it did nothing.
>>17048312
It's not a guy thing.
I love to text. I'm forcing myself not to text a girl i like because I don't want to be clingy.
My best friend's girl is the one who doesn't initiate sex at all because she's tired or has body image issues or w/e, but claims that she loves him to pieces and hates that they're not having sex.
If it bothers you too much maybe you should leave instead of suffering.
Was talking to a friend's gf earlier today and she was asking me which one of her friends I would date, I said no to all of them until oneitis' name came up and then she said she would set us up. What should I do?
should I get a boob job? pretty sure that these are ruined
>>17048320
I guess I really should. Considering he used to at least sometime ask me out and stuff before, even though it was still rare, I really appreciated it.
I'm just so tired.
>>17048333
>>17048305
Bumping these two.
>>17048307
hair wax
I do it every day, it is not really hard once you get a hang of.
>>17048353
I don't pretend to have an answer, but it seems like you need to talk, and I got time.
So tell me about it.
How long have you been together and how is he like now?
>>17048312
Are you his first GF? I was kind of like that with mine.
Don't take this as me putting the blame on you, but I can give you advice and can't do anything about him, so I'll be focusing on that end.
Do you guys live together? Does he really never try to initiate, or does he only do it at times that you're not interested? Did he try in the past, and perhaps you refused enough that he's discouraged?
My sexual relationship with my last GF ended up like that after a few years. She was frustrated that I didn't initiate enough, I was frustrated that when I tried, she'd usually say no. I usually tried when we woke up, right after she got out of the shower, or when we went to bed, and almost always got refused, and it became pretty discouraging. She always told me that she usually wanted it in the middle of the day, but when we were both home and not too busy at those times, she was usually staring intently at her computer, wearing baggy old t-shirts and sweatpants, and had a face covered in skincare products and stuff, so not exactly an appearance that would make me think "hey, I want to have sex with her right now."
Like I said, I'm not putting it all on you and none of this stuff may be the case, but maybe it's worth thinking about. He might be more inclined to initiate if he has clearer signs of when you're available and interested in sex. If he has particular tastes or fetishes it might be worth subtly appealing to them, too, at least if it's not a pain in the ass.
Also, I don't want to come off as too negative, but some of what you're experiencing might be signs that it's just not right for you guys, or that something needs to change substantially in the relationship.
>>17048335
so what about it guys, do I need to get them done?
>>17048312
Oh, one other point. When you guys talked, did he have any requests or criticisms of his own?
Even if you feel like he's totally at fault, trust me, things will be so much easier if you make him feel like he's getting something in return for what he does. I ended my last relationship largely because I felt like I'd spent five years constantly improving myself and trying to be better for her, but she was exactly the same person and I felt like I was constantly chasing a moving target and getting nothing in return for it.
>>17048335
If those are actually yours, then yes, I'd have something done. My personal preference is for perkiness and shape over size, so I'd suggest getting the larger one reduced instead of the smaller one enlarged. (Plus, it's healthier in the long run and insurance is much more likely to cover it.)
>>17048312
>>17048353
Sounds like personality, just a quirk of his that you gotta get used to (seems like a small thing to leave him over, but eh if you're considering it then it probably isn't going well anyway).
>>17048362
The girl's nuts or awkward, her friend is the only way you're going to get through to her. If you're impatient or just looking to fuck, go find someone else.
>>17048335
>>17048381
Yes, get it fixed. How did they get that bad, anyway? Just bad luck or genes?
Girls,
Do you look down on a guy if his friends cheat on their girlfriends? A couple of my friends cheat on their girlfriends, one flagrantly so. I try to just stay out of it other than saying I think it's kind of shitty. I feel like I enable them though but don't want to get involved. I've never cheated but was cheated on so it kind of cemented my views but do girls think less of guys who are friends with cheaters or assume that they're inclined to cheat as well?
Girls:
My girlfriend of a year broke up with me for some other guy, then broke up with him shortly after.
It depends on the girl if she feels bad or misses me right?
>>17048388
>If you're impatient or just looking to fuck, go find someone else.
Well I wasn't in just to fuck. So initially i was very patient (apart from that gut feeling of wanting things to move), but I met another girl who is much more demonstrative, and actually shows interest and wants to see me.
Now I feel a bit bad that i have these two girls in mind, so to speak. I guess i'll keep it this way until things actually get somewhere with one of them.
I don't know if that makes me an asshole, but I did ask the first girl out, and, unlike the second one, she's playing vague.
How do I tell if a girl is interested in me instead of just being nice? It's happened several times where I've become friends with a girl and after a while she just stops talking to me, and I find out that she had a crush on me and got mad that I was apparently flirting with her and never made a move. I literally don't know what flirting is, I'm just kind of a weird socially awkward guy and try to make sure people feel at ease when talking to me.
>>17048400
they were fine I was breastfeeding then my birth control fucked them all up. this was before
>>17048335
You'll feel better about yourself if you have it done. If you have insurance, it'll likely cover the procedure costs since that kind of asymmetry can mess with your posture, gait, etc.
>>17048465
I only have Medicaid so I don't think it will be covered. I have them I can't even stand to let my husband see me or touch me now. and yes my back and neck hurt a lot now. one is an F cup and the other is an A its ridiculous :(
>>17048199
>>>17048199
>What the other Anon said. Don't learn guitar because you want to use it to seduce women. Learn it because you like playing and creating music.
>I'm a femanon who always had a thing for guitarists (and drummers), but not for posers. The thing that makes musicians so appealing is how passionate they are about their art. One guy was a beginner, but he practiced and noodled and talked about how he taught himself. It made him more attractive because he was really into it and wasn't embarrassed that he wasn't that great, but he kept practicing anyway.
