How should I feel and/or handle this situation /adv/? It's not too complicated. My gf of about 5 months, (but add the time spent together including talking and it's about 10-11 months) might be going out to a bar we've both gone too together with one of her girlfriends tonight.
I feel conflicted. Don't want to be controlling. But I know I'll be wondering if any other guys will approach her, offer her a drink.
We've had a conversation about the drink offering before, she said she'd judge whether or not to accept a drink from another guy based on whether he would leave her alone or not.
On that matter I think that's total bullshit. The whole offering of a drink is for the sole purpose of getting to know someone anyways. So I can't help but have this crossing my mind too.
>>17009386
Really? At where you live dudes comes and offer drink that random? Gosh. And even girls take it that casual?
If she takes it as its nothing serious I'm sorry it's not worth it dude.
>>17009410
?
I don't know that they do. But it crosses my mind, the "what if" scenario.
>takes it as nothing serious
I'm just not sure. I don't know. She hasn't given me any explicit reason to not trust her. Maybe she just wants to see her friend. But I'm uneasy cause I've dealt with cheating before
You're thinking because of what she said about the drink that she's not taking it that serious?
I'm conflicted. Might sleep on it until the morning and see
>>17009421
If a guy offers to buy a girl a drink, and she says yes, it's an invitation to flirt. It's not like "I agree to fuck you," obviously, but she's giving him a chance. If she was taking the relationship seriously, she'd be paying for her own drinks. Doesn't mean she can't go out and hang out with her friend, even play "wingman" to help set her friend up with a guy, but she shouldn't really be letting other guys buy drinks for her.
You can't really TELL her not to do this, ultimatums never work in situations like this. But I'd personally take it as a red flag if my girlfriend was out there, without me, letting other guys buy drinks for her.
>We've had a conversation about the drink offering before, she said she'd judge whether or not to accept a drink from another guy based on whether he would leave her alone or not.
You already called it, but this is nonsense. A guy wouldn't offer her a drink unless he at LEAST wanted to talk. Even if she's telling the truth, that's just kind of a shitty thing to do.
>>17009424
Right. At least she's truthful in that regard.
I'm thinking the best course of action right now is just to let it go for the night. How do I figure out if anyone offered her a drink? Is just directly asking the way to go about it?
We've had a lot of good times. Went on a week long cross country road trip a few months ago.
I've told her before how I feel about the whole drink thing. So right now I'm judging it on if she tells me it happens/what she tells me after I've told her my feelings.
Genuinely feel like everythings up in the air, but I guess that's life, it happens.
Thanks anons. Will appreciate any extra advice but I'm gonna get my mind off of it for a bit
>>17009442
You can't find out whether that guy buy her drink or not. This's what she needs to be honest to you and herself. She say yes when a guy want to buy her a drink which makes me think she's not respect or,at least,serious about your relationship yet. Why would she do this kind of thing when she's taken already? Unless she want to open more possibility of finding someone better. Or maybe she's an attention whore that can't live without being surrounded by dozens of men.
But on the bright side she honestly talking about this to you. Better than she lets dudes buy her drinks and flirt and all behind your back.
>>17009468
We'll be talking about it tomorrow. I'm sure she'll tell me. And I have a good idea of the questions I wanna ask.
I just needed some affirmation this wasn't unreasonable, for some reason.
But thanks anons it helps.
>open more possibilities
that. I think that says a lot.
Either way, for better or worse things are about to get more clear between us
>>17009502
Good luck dude. Update for us whether things went well or not. Cheers
