So lately, my girlfriend has been kind of distant. She states that she's been busy with work and stuff, and honestly it's made me pretty paranoid, because whenever she's busy with something that important, she lets me know (but she hasn't at all). Recently we've been having fights, but I wouldn't really call them fights, we've just been talking about the problems of the relationship. About 2 weeks ago she told me that she doesn't completely trust me and after that I figured out she was being dishonest about certain things. She went to her stalker Ex's party knowing full and well that if she told me, I would have said no, and for some reason has a hard time swallowing the fact she's been dishonest, as this also ties in with the fact that she said she trusted me completely months before (only to tell me recently that wasn't the case).
She got mad at me that I asked if she was cheating on me, but it doesn't exactly help her case because I've been trying to get ahold of her, but she keeps texting me in 30 minutes to 2 hour periods. She tells me that she feels like a burden to me in the relationship, so I asked her on how she views the relationship, and she said that she couldn't answer it. Earlier she blamed her meds for her not replying, she just seems to be hiding something to me, but I want to give her the benefit of the doubt. I've just been trying to talk things out with her but she's being so difficult to work with.
We've been dating for a year, if that makes any significance.
>>16966435
Look, she's being sketchy and you're being clingy. I understand where you're coming from because women in my experience don't ever want to admit that their behavior is poor in any way shape or form. They'd rather just respond like so:
>Girl acts sketchy
>You: Hey you're acting sketchy
>girl: DONT U TRUST MEEEEE
It's called not taking accountability for their own behavior. Every girl I've ever been with does it.
The correct response on your end is to decide, without her, whether this event is a deal breaker. Do you want to be in an unhealthy relationshit? After you decide that (hopefully the answer is no), the next step is to *not contact her again tonight.* I'm serious. You'll be all anxious OH GOD where is she and what is she doing?!
She's a fucking adult. Where she is and what's she is doing is her business. HOWEVER, your business is how you're going to respond. My response would be to leave her the hell alone the rest of the night and wait for her to reach out to you (she will.)
When she reaches out to you, my next response would be to meet face to face and say:
>I didn't know where you were last night, you didn't respond to my texts or calls or try to make me feel comfortable in any way, and I have a problem with that.
She'll twist it back on you "Don't you trust me, UR not my mommy, etc. etc. bladdy fucking blah."
My next response would be: "You're right. However, I do not like being made to feel uncomfortable just because you're on some kind of sketch shit. Because of that, I can't be committed to you. BYYYYEEEEE."
Watch how fast she tries to twist the shit and get you to stay. But you don't stay, you go find an adult woman who realizes that all she has to do is communicate with you and value your feelings and comfort and you'll leave her alone. It's called trust. She knew you felt weird. She knew she was acting sketchy. She didn't give a fuck.
>>16966476
Yeah, she tried to pull the "you don't trust me?!?" thing on me. She had a really really hard time swallowing the fact her behavior was incredibly fucking off.
To be honest, I've been trying to even meet up with her, she hasn't given me any response. Granted, I'm free Saturday, so hopefully she picks up on that.
>>16966476
This OP
The fact she's being sketchy out of the get go warrants a break up. You have 3 options
1) Dump her and move on
2) Play aloof for the meantime and fuck her with heavy protection
3) Downgrade her to fwb status and move on
It sounds like you two live with each other or something, and that makes me concerned. Whatever the case is, I personally don't tolerate it and the premises of her being sketchy warrants a break up. Just know if you do break up, she will blame you to spin her own hamster wheel.
She's potentially using you as a beta provider to cuck on while she has fun elsewhere. You can easily spin that by having fun with her in the meanwhile and striking the break up or fwb news when you find another woman worth being with.
>>16966435
>About 2 weeks ago she told me that she doesn't completely trust me and after that I figured out she was being dishonest about certain things. She went to her stalker Ex's party knowing full and well that if she told me, I would have said no, and for some reason has a hard time swallowing the fact she's been dishonest, as this also ties in with the fact that she said she trusted me completely months before (only to tell me recently that wasn't the case).
That's the big red flag, when it comes to cheaters. They do some really horrible things, hide it, and the guilt causes paranoia. So they end up accusing others of doing the same thing, usually without reason, and that brings about their undoing.
>Earlier she blamed her meds for her not replying
What the fuck does that even mean? Meds for what? What is she taking?
I was in the same exact position as you. My ex would hang out with another guy " just Friends" and after work she'd go hang out with him just to "smoke"
>even though she didn't like smoking weed
And of course she was dating him while she was dating me and fucked him because
>"I needed a place to stay".
Even though she never stayed over his house one night. She'd get on and play Xbox with me right after they where done fucking and she later admitted to fucking him 5 times in 3 days. Later on in our relation ship she started to go to parties with other men. I told her it wasn't cool but she responded with
>'' You're being to controlling"
then she wouldn't text me for the rest of the weekend.
what i say is that she has already arranged another man, and now she's distancing herself from you so it doesn't hurt HER as much... im going through the same thing senpai :(
>>16966542
I agree with this statement from experience
>>16966586
Ouch. not OP, but that sucks. I've been with women like that. I hope you learn your lesson and run the fuck away next time.
(OP Here) She doesn't seem like the type to cheat honestly, she's very nice and does charity work, but even I have my doubts because she's not cooperating one bit.
>>16966640
OP are you dumb? The issue here isn't even that she's cheating or not cheating. The issue here is:
>It's called not taking accountability for their own behavior.
>She knew you felt weird. She knew she was acting sketchy. She didn't give a fuck.
Can you stop pussy footing around such an obvious sign of a woman ?
>HUIRR She does charity work!
Probably to conceal her twisted black heart.
But oh well. You keep on keepin on OP! See where you land.
>>16966640
>she's very nice and does charity work
That just means that she does things that make her feel good and accomplished. It doesn't mean she won't look elsewhere, OP. Stop trying to fool yourself.
>>16966640
She doesn't respect you. It doesn't matter if she's the nicest person in the world she's not treating you with respect. The relationship is already over.
>>16966680
>>16966712
Thing is, I've been wanting to break up with her for awhile now, I've just wanted to know if it's for certain now.
>>16966735
If you feel that way then it's definitely time to go.
You're not responsible for her actions, but I'm sure you fucked some things up too (everybody does) so think about that for next time.
Good luck anon.
desu man to man just break up with her homie
She's cheating homey. My girl did the same thing. She probably has a side dude and she's intruding to figure out if she should stay with the old or hop on the new. Get the fuck out or get some software to watch her when she leaves.
