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Anonymous
2016-03-23 01:53:18 Post No. 16947146
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Anonymous
2016-03-23 01:53:18
Post No. 16947146
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I don't know where to turn. I feel like I'm at rock-bottom emotionally and I don't know what to do. I don't know where to start but I'll give it a shot.
I had a pretty normal life up until I got kicked out of a very respected student organization I was part of back in college on New Year's Eve. Needless to say, this defined 2015 for me. Many of my friends shunned me as a result--not maliciously, but just because the situation was awkward and I wasn't spending time with that group, being kicked out and all. The organization went on to win a highly publicized national competition while I watched at home. I was indicted by my school for what I did as well. I don't want to go into details to preserve my anonymity, but I don't think I deserved the severity of the punishment I received. I defined my ego as part of this group, and getting kicked out and indicted felt like I was being prosecuted for thoughtcrime, and was an identity-shattering experience.
In the wake of that my girlfriend broke up with me and I graduated college, leaving me alone with no one to answer to, too much free time, and very few responsibilities. Over the summer I lived by myself and spent too much time on the internet. I started taking redpills on modern society and the world. I watched the world I knew crumble around me as I awoke to the reality of life.
I now sympathize with normalfags, but I just can't relate to them in the same way, and I find it very difficult to form lasting relationships anymore. I try to put forth effort to hang out with people, but I think I'm less fun than I used to be. The perspectives I think are realistic probably come off as extremely pessimistic or dark to most people. Not trying to be edgy--I get the feeling this is just the fact of the matter. Other times the opinions I hold are just not socially acceptable, so I come off as quiet or awkward when these topics come up in conversation, since I can't lie convincingly.
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