>>16896373

try to get his address. send him a personal letter. a letter lets you send the message to him and say exactly what you feel you need to say without being interrupted or assumptions being made. the personal touch helps.

>dear, XX
>my name is YY and it seems that I am your daughter. I have never contacted you for ZZ reasons, but since WW I've been feeling a bit VV and was hoping we'd be able to talk. i dont know if we'd end up connecting, or being penpals or just friends, or what have you. I'm not looking to have a bond, or this or that and the third thing, i don't need money, or any of that jazz. I simply hope to have at least one conversation with you to get a better understand of where I come from.
>if you'd like to reach me, please call me at QQ

obviously refine that to your personal touch. id harp on the 'im not looking to get anythign from you'.

>>16896391

Lol, I'm a guy, more emotional than most but still.

>>16896396

my bad, i assumed daughter. i think you might have a better chance at meeting him. does he have any other children in his current life? sons in particular?

but like i said, just make sure in the first message you insist this isn't about getting anything from him. just that you want to meet. it may end with that one conversation. it ma go great places. but you get the idea.

personal letters are more real. an email the first assumption is 'is this a scam? or a prank?' phone calls are like 'i think you got the wrong number'.

but a personal letter is pretty precise.

also why would it be embarassing for him? you can offer to keep it secret.

>>16896410
>>16896405

He's got a wife and another son who is 13 and it might evoke memories of a forgotten past, I got all this information from my grandad.

I'm definitely considering the personal letter, but I don't want to think he'd avoid calling me, that said I have to be realistic about it and accept whatever happens.

I would really just like to know what he's like, irrelevant to this my current life state is pretty dire, but I am definitely not in the business of asking him for favours aside from knowing more about him and what his side of the story is.

>>16896439
The letter thing is a really good idea. If you just call him out of the blue after all these years that's really going to put him on the spot and he might not react well to that. My eldest son calls me about once a year if I'm lucky, and I never have the slightest clue what I'm supposed to say to him.

Sending him a letter avoids all of that awkwardness because it doesn't require an instant reply - if he wants to he can take a week to figure out how best to handle it before he actually does anything. I don't know how well you know his current family, his wife in particular, but if you think she might react badly to it you might want to consider sending the letter to his workplace instead. That gives him the option to keep it to himself if he wants to.

If you haven't heard from him after, say, two weeks there are two routes you can go down. You could just call him up, he's had a couple of weeks to think about it after all. The other option is to go to your grandad and see if he'd be willing to act as an intermediary.

>>16896496

I think sending it to his home would be best because he is a CEO of a PMI company, which is why I am not so sure about phoning him, he seems like a very busy person.

I have no idea if his wife even knows about me, also, he had three daughters who are all older than me with a different woman, and I've never met them either, I really don't know what to think of him considering he came out rich.

>>16896530

Not that I care about the money, I am financially okay myself and really, asking him for help is just not something id even want the encounter to be about, I want answers, not a hand-out.