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Anonymous
2016-02-06 03:47:06 Post No. 16773754
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Anonymous
2016-02-06 03:47:06
Post No. 16773754
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I need some serious advice
Let me start by saying that I acknowledge the fact that my killing myself I would be being selfish, and a horrible person , and whatnot, but as of late, I've been seriously considering it. Ever since I was ten I've had family issues. My mom kicked my dad out, and it killed me to see the one person I love only once a week, and to see him financially struggling. My mom went batshit insane and she cut off everyone including my half sister who I loved so much and haven't heard from since I was fifteen. I missed both her and my dad every single day. So much so, I'd cry myself to sleep pretty frequently. When I was sixteen my dad passed away, and since then I've had no friends, and I haven't had a conversation with anyone except my teachers. My only brother also abused me physically and mentally. My brother is essentially my mom's idea of a perfect child, he gets perfect grades, he's on varsity football, and so far he's been accepted to three ivy league schools. I have virtually no talents, and I suck at math which has kept my grades lower than they should be, and I applied to seven colleges and I've been rejected by them all. I guess you could say I'm an academic failure, and I really don't want to be poor with a shitty job. I really wanted to major in political science, but that's just a dream now. The only thing that has been keeping me going is that my dad wouldn't want me to die. Part of me died when he did, and as much as I want to make him proud, without him I really don't think I can keep going. I have nothing to live for, nor do I have anyone to live for, thus the reason I feel like it's best that I just kill myself. My family has already made it clear that they wouldn't care. I just don't know why I haven't been able to bring myself to it. I guess would miss little things though, like running, or swimming, and seeing the sun rise or walking on the beach like my dad and I used to. Anyone been in a similar situation, or have advice?