Can you and should you, as a male, have female friends? Like, regular friends? Especially if you are in a relationship already?
yes and yes.
Bro, every conversation you have with a woman does not have to be in pursuit of smashing her guts.
>>16673115
Yes. Its helps you weed out the crazy gf and prevents you from ruining you're life.
EXAMPLE
>Two best friends one male one female.
>Like family to me.
>New girl friend
>I'm blind to the red flags
-Short red hair
-Septum piercing
-unnatural scares
-tattoos
>Best female friend and new gf don't get long.
>Month into relationship gf starts moaning at me for spending time with bff.
>Two months gf starts having "panic attacts"
>Bff tells me she's crazy
>I agree.
>I cut and run.
The way I see it with out my bff the crazy might not have became noticeable as fast as it did.
>>16673152
That's actually pretty good advice there anon, thanks!
My gf of 3 years doesn't let me have female friends either... I crave female attention, though so it's probably justified.
>>16673115
It's fine to a degree. You have to be honest with yourself if there is any sexual attraction or want on either side. If you want to fuck her, then no it won't work. If you're actually, legitimately, no lie platonic with the girl, then it's perfectly fine to have a female friend.
If you're in a relationship it can get tricky. The thing is, if there is actually any sexual tension between you and the friend, your girlfriend will be able to easily spot it, and it will slowly but surely tear your relationship apart. But if they demand you cut contact for no particular reason, then that's usually a pretty sure red flag that they are crazy.
Trying to figure this out for myself. I have a female friend and while there isn't any sexual tension between us I HAVE fallen I love with her.
I don't think my wife will be too pleased when she figures it out.
So, based on my sample size of one, I'd say it's a terrible idea and won't work.
P.S. although I am tortured every day now by my unrequited and unacceptable love, I've never been happier.
>>16673594
>there isn't any sexual tension between us
>I HAVE fallen I love with her.
Assuming you're not trolling, cut contact with her for the sake of your marriage. There isn't anything to figure out.
>>16673194
Thats a red flag.
My current gf actively supports my relationship with female friends and has became close to them all.
>>16673636
Yeah, the difference is honestly knowing if there is sexual tensions or not. Girls will tend to pick up on that easily. If there isn't any, then they tend not to worry about it unless they have insecurity issues.
>>16673649
Anybody could pick up on it easily. It just had to be someone looking from the outside in.
>>16673676
Very true.
I do. I'm just aware of where the lines of propriety are drawn and I don't cross them. If my girlfriend has a problem she'll let me know and I'll address it.
>>16673617
Not trolling.
No desire to get into a sexual relationship with my friend at the moment, but I'm sure my feelings for her will keep getting stronger.
Currently trying to figure out a way not to love her, because she's the kind of friend I've waited all my life for and cutting contact would be a real punch in the head. It's not looking too promising though, the only suggestions I seem to get are just to cut contact and wait to grow cold towards her again.
Stupid stupid stupid. Why did I have to notice how amazing she is? Things were simpler when I wasn't paying attention.
>>16673115
Fuck yeah. Some of my best friends are women and they're awesome. Just because our parts fit together doesn't mean we have to put them together. I sometimes wish they had been born dudes so that I didn't have to deal with people questioning my friendship with them.
>>16673576
What if the gf wants you to cut the contact to another girl because she feels ugly in comparison and starts becoming jealous or afraid of it. Crazy or not?
>>16673687
Well, would you rather get a punch in the head, or a ruined marriage?
>>16673715
(Probably going to end up with both)
>>16673709
There's some serious insecurity issues there.
Where does it end? She'll start dictating that you can't talk to that pretty coworker, you can't watch porn, she'll freak out if she thinks you were checking out that hottie in the next booth, shit like that. Not feeling pretty enough is a pretty lame reason. You should also be assuring her how attractive you find her. You should always make them feel like the prettiest girl in the room.
>>16673724
She has no issues with me watching porn, she just doesn't want to see what i watch unless we watch it together. She generally has no problems with every girl, just with a select few.
>>16673115
>Like, regular friends?
Real friends? Ones you aren't pining for on the side? Of course. It's only when you're secretly in love with them that you shouldn't be friends with them.
>>16673115
Yes you should. They can help you build your relatioship (from a womans perspective) and let you know when your messing up. Just dont bang them cuz you might end up loosing all of them, even ur gf. If your gf gets angry or jealous tell her to grow up dont believe that bs that se jealous cuz she love you thats all a lie if she really did love you she would trust you no matter what and wouldnt be jealous of any girl. If she doesnt grow up after that and tries to get you jealous using guy friends, leave her cuz you dating a girl, not a woman.
It's okay to have female friends, but you have to maintain boundaries. Can't speak for other women but I wouldn't marry a guy who texts another girl everyday, buys her gifts or takes her on vacations. Fuck that I want a life partner not to be a replacement or third wheel. Depends on age too. In your twenties is different than thirties. Past thirties most people concentrate on their family and it would be weird to have your husband hanging out with another woman.
I let my bf have girl friends but he fell in love with one of them (:
>>16673745
Hmm, still seems a little weird. The only reason she doesn't want you to see your friend is because she's prettier than your gf? Communication hasn't helped at all? Has she given off any other red flags?
>>16673862
>tell her to grow up
This isn't very good advice. Relationships are built on good communication. They are a team effort, and just telling them to go fuck themselves is usually not a good move.
>>16673897
No not really. It's only because those few women have shown interest in me, one of them in particular who tried to get in contact with me for the last 5 years and just recently succeeded finding me on social media somehow. Just that much effort and the fact that my gf thinks she's prettier than herself and the fact that i know the other chick since very early childhood seemed to disturb her. Though she ultimately said she would let me see her if i really wanted because she wouldn't want to hurt me, but she'd still be stressed out all the time i'm with the other girl.
>>16673934
Is there honestly no sexual tension or sexual attraction there? If you can honestly say no, then I don't see a problem with it, and I think your girlfriend will come to terms with it. Invite her to hang out with the two of you! Maybe they can become friends. That will take a lot of weight off her mind. Also be sure to still pay attention to your girlfriend when you're all together.
>>16673115
I don't think it matters either way. if you refused to have female friends, or if you insisted on having them, that would be kinda odd. but if you just happened to have or not have them...eh friends are friends.
>>16673902
That is good communication.
>>16673902
Aint tell him to tell her to go fuck herself btw.
Generally speaking most boy/girl friendships don't work because one of them is attracted to the other. Hey, sometimes they don't even have to be attracted; they only need to think they're bangable and the power imbalance has already fucked everything up.
I don't recommend it. I can't think of a single male/female "friendship" I know where the guy isn't trying to get into the girls pants.
>>16673894
My ex didn't let me have girl friends and she cheated on me. Funny how that works
>>16673961
Nah. The girl who tried to contact me doesn't really attract me. She's not ugly, just not my type. Same goes for personality. I think my gf just never was in a situation like this and what you've said seems very reasonable. Thanks for lending me an ear
>>16673115
Yes, yes, yes and yes. Next question?
>>16673115
It will only cause problems in the long run. Overrated and totally not worth it.
>>16673115
This video should tell you everything you need to know
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_lh5fR4DMA
>>16673987
Relationships are stupid
>>16673115
In my experience it never ends well. It causes a seed of doubt which is extremely hard to get rid of. Sometimes the friend starts getting jealous too and tries to interfere and manipulate you into breaking up with someone who may really love you
