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Relationship/dating advice

I firmly believe that all men have great potential deep inside of him, the guy you might of seen getting all the girls on in the media or in person, you are that guy, you just need to open your eyes to what's really going on. With discipline and getting a grip/control of your feelings, you will see, EVERYTHING. I've been able to look past women's looks and contol my urges, thinking of the bigger picture instead. If you can do that you're half way home. There's plenty of women on this planet and you'll get your dick wet, just be patient. If you fucked one pussy, you'd likely fucked them all. That's the reality of that, but your feelings don't believe in reality/common sense.

Anyways, answer these questions first.

>How old are you guys?
>How long have you been talking/dating?
>How would you describe each other as a person?
>How often do you see each other or go on a date?
>How often to you text and talk otp?


Then tell me what's your issue.
>>
>>16643832

What is the bigger picture to you?
>>
>>16643832
I'm going to replace my couch with her ass.
>>
>I'm 19 she's 17

>13 months

>I would describe her as sweet, gorgeous, funny, intelligent, logical, and my best friend

>she'd say roughly the same except she'd say I can be an asshole sometimes

>see her every day, go on "dates" once or twice a month"

>text every day, but mostly see each other in person


For the past three months we've been having sex like twice a month. I always come on to her, but she always rejects me. I'm really starting to get angry when it happens. I ask her why she doesn't want to have sex and she say's she just not in the mood. But then other times she'll say she's so horny and how good my dick game is, but when it comes time to actually have sex she rejects me again.

Just typing this out I can feel my blood pressure raising. It's such an annoying and frustrating situation. I'm too young for this shit, I want to fuck random girls when she does this to me, but at the same time, I don't think the odds are good of me ever meeting another human being I care about like I care about her. I can honestly say she is the only person alive that I love.
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>>16644169
My cushion too.
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>>16644180
do many people comment on the age ? And is she turning 18 soon? I'm speaking to this girl at the minute and it's like your sitch bro. I'm 19 and she's 17. What do?
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>>16644223
Make her 12. Then keep her that way he he :4
>>
>>16644223
No one does. Some guys at my gym give me a hard time about it, but it's all in good fun.

I'd totally go for it. Not weird at all. And she won't be 18 for another 8 months.
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>>16644252
The only thing that I think might be lame is my friends, like I wouldn't see it being a problem since one of them boned one but I spoke to him and he said "if you're going for gf material she has to be 18 in the next 4-8 months" I think she is in Oct or Nov. She's cute tho and really into me
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>>16644180

Well tell me first.

>how many times you had sex before this happened?
>how long does it last typically?

Maybe her sex drive isn't what you thought it was.
>>
>>16644180

Some men take too much pride in their sex game. Got to balance selfishness and pleasing your woman. Good d isn't going to keep her around, if a guy is willing to communicate and experiment with his gf, he can be good at sex too, nothing special. Be selfish and pump her for a min or 2 or a quick blowjob, just for a nut, you don't have to please her all the time. Sex is important but you have to arouse her mind first with romance and affection. If you're not asking for much its a huggge probably if she isn't putting out.
>>
>>16644462
This was written by a dude. Straight up.
>If you're not asking for much its a huggge
what does this mean? Do you need a hug? What tf are u sayin qt3.14?
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>>16644180

This is OP, this happens to alooot of men.She takes what you need, you take what she needs. Soo,what i would suggest is cutting communication completely with her, no dates, no love. When she asks why you haven't spoken to her the first time, tell her "I'm not in the mood." . Then ignore her until she aplogizes and comes around. She'll say stuff like, "So sex is all that matters to you, i thought you cared more about me.". Guilt tripping you and playing victim, ignore ignore and IGNORE until real apology. Sex is a need for a man, you do way more for her than she does for you, it's not asking much to get a quickie every now and again, don't take her shit or she's going to walk all over you. WE MEN DON'T ASK FOR FUCKING MUCH.

Maybe after she aplogizes, she may give you a reason is to why she interested in sex as much. Ask her why she hasn't been in the mood, if not. Anyways, you need to do this, she's putting you in a position where you'll end up doing something you regret with another girl. She'll be a broken women and you'll be heartbroken man.

You may say this is harsh or a game but it's not, its about having equal or nothing. she do her part, you do your part. Could you lose her, yes but if you don't do anything and keep whining to her, a breakup will be inevitable. You do what you do, out of fear of losing her and she should feel the same way too, put fear into her heart.
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>>16644165

If you're looking for a relationship the bigger picture is seeing if she is girlfriend/wife material, is she giving, does she have a good attitude, and is she trustworthy. If you want her to be a wife, you have to see if you could actually live with her and find out if she will make a good mom. That's the bigger picture.

It's a lot of horror stories out their because guys went by their feelings pursuing women, big boobs, big ass and a cute face have fucked men over sense the beginning of time.
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>>16644385
We used to bang every day, then every other day. Then twice a week. Then once or twice a week. Now this. Sex lasts anywhere from 5 minutes to 30 minutes. But usually in the 12-17 minute window I'd estimate.
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>>16644462
>>16644480
So obviously a dude, never crossed my mind that he wasn't
>>
>>16644688
>>16644480

Yes i am a dude and i meant every word. I meant to say.

>If you're not asking for much it's a huggge problem if she isn't putting out.
>>
>>16643832

I'm 19, she's 18

3 months

She's passive but nice to everyone, very sweet
I'm outspoken and abrasive to some, but sweet and loving in private

We've only managed to meet once over winter break, but see each other every day in college and usually sleep together. Dates are once every week or two.

Text all day-every day. Talk otp rarely, but has been increasing in frequency.
Recently, my gf told me that a little after we had sex for the first time (we weren't dating then) she had a one time hook up with a guy who was a three pump chump, used a condom, and she laughed at. We weren't dating at the time, even though I asked her to, because she thought she was going to switch Unis. It wasn't technically cheating, but it still feels bad to me, and she regrets it. What can we do to help us feel better, and still remain dating? I feel shitty, but it wasn't actually cheating.
>>
>>16645072

Did you bring up the topic or she said it out the blue?

Anyways i say, get even, tell a story about a chick you banged. "This one nerdy girl i banged she kept using her teeth when giving me oral, i gave her a clit orgasm, she went dead to sleep snoring like a hippo and i walked out and didn't bother finishing lol.". Like an embrassing sex moment, if you don't have one make it up. Write some down just in case she starts talking again and believe that shit really happen. It should help you get over it and pay close attention to her reaction.

If she knows you too well, don't do it. However, how dare she put that mental pictures into your head, she's suppose to be your princess. It's innocent yes but it puts mental pictures are inevitable. Dude, women aren't princesses their just people like you and me, they like sex too but mental pictures are uncalled for.
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>>16645189
I don't really want to "get even" with her, and its not the mental pictures I'm mad about. I just feel betrayed somehow
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>>16644635
this. never let the other person have complete control over the leverage in your relationship, regardless of shit gender roles cooked up by the same generations that brought us phrenology.
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>>16644180
she probably doesn't want to have sex so much because of the fact that she is 17. Sounds like she is in high school and you aren't, which is probably the reason why she is so prude right now about sex. Just wait it out. Once, she gets a little older (maybe even 18) her opinion about sex will change because it always does with girls. Once they realize that it isn't that taboo shit they are told it is supposed to be and they no longer have a high school mentality about sex, then she will be into having it a lot more often. She just needs to mature a little. I wouldn't throw away a good relationship over the fact that you only have sex twice a month. I had the same situation with a girl I used to date my senior year of high school except she was year older than me. Once it hit october of her freshman year in college, we had sex pretty much every day when for the time before that when we were dating in high school i had to beg for a handjob once a month and that wasn't always guaranteed. It is all about her perspective of the sex. Also, you can speed the process up by causing her feelings about sex to change to begin with by making her feel more comfortable doing it in some way. Don't exactly know how you would go about making her feel more comfortable with it because every girl is different, but trust me it's literally because she feels like she is doing something wrong every time she has sex with you. Don't dump her over it. You will completely regret the decision. A good thing is always better than a new thing. I've learned that the hard way before when it comes to girls. Plus, once she realizes that she was acting oddly about it she will probably recognize your patience and thank you for it.
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>>16645241

I think she's just getting comfortable with you but how was it brought up?
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>>16643832
>26
>talking for years, dating only recently
>sweetheart yet coquettish for her; I'm too sentimental and apathetic trapped in a successful persons body
>long distance
>every few weeks we videochat

We both know long distance doesn't work, so as far as what we're both up to, out of sight out of mind. The potential that we'll be together is years away. Though neither of us are hooking up with other people as of now, I know she'll have no problem when it happens. I think I'd almost rather know if she is: I can tell when she's hiding something, and recently there's been a sense of something to hide.

I want to ask her, but I know its just jealousy. The root of the issue is the feeling that I care more for her than the reverse I guess. We work well together, so while all signs point to "don't bother" right now, I'd still like to make it work. Thing is, once I start hooking up, I bet I'd move on pretty quick. So I'm in limbo: waiting for us to get together or find something better. Strange situation.
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>>16644661
what about... love :) ?
>>
>How old are you guys?

22 & 20.

>How long have you been talking/dating?

year and a bit.

>How would you describe each other as a person?

i would describe her as me a couple of years in the past, so i relate a lot to her and enjoy that she sort of admires me.

>How often do you see each other or go on a date?

that's kind of the problem.

>How often to you text and talk otp?

like once a week.

the problem is we keep flaking on each other. like one of us will set a date, but then the other will just blow it off and apologize some time later and try to make a new one. it's kind of ridiculous. it's not a one sided thing at all, and we both ask each other out fairly often (she just asked me out like 6 hours ago, last time I asked her out was two weeks ago), but we'll just flake, or disappear, or get too drunk and break a finger and won't make it, etc, etc.

the sexual tension when we're both in the same room is frankly absurd. like people are afraid to walk in the middle of our line of sight because they're afraid they'll get pregnant.

it's very annoying for both of us.

what to do?
>>
>>16646631

"sweetheart" that's all you got to say about this woman you would wait years for and stop banging chicks for. Will you move close to her? If not you need to move on pal because she's not moving towards you, she isn't hung up on a guy she hasn't even meet in person. Does she ask you for money?
>>
>>16647107
Is it more like schedules clashing or general forgetfulness?
>>
>>16644635
rarely do I ever see actual intelligent people on 4chan, bravo my good sir, thank you for this
>>
>>16647162
>general forgetfulness

this combined with unstable personalities. for instance once we decided to meet in LA for the summer and when i got there i didn't go out of my motel room for a week. she's done similar things.

it's a weird situation.
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>>16647107

You're flaking each other? She may be upset, that you canceled a date with her.
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>>16647081

yeah
>>
>>16647146
thats not all, just the first that comes to mind.

we compliment each other, jive well, have the same outlook on life, want the same things (mostly).

Cant move. neither of us, due to contractual obligation.

Wait, there's misunderstanding. We were friends (in person) before we both moved. Doesn't ask for money
>>
>>16647642

You're going to have to let her go man, neither of you are going to move.
>>
>How old are you guys?
19
>How long have you been talking/dating?
nearly 4 months
>How would you describe each other as a person?
she's cool, a little bit dumb.
>How often do you see each other or go on a date?
she essentially lives with me, we have not gone on many dates recently as money is tight.
>How often to you text and talk otp?
on the phone? not often, we are with each other most of our free time.

i started my first serious relationship about 4 months ago now, she said i love you within a week and i was caught off guard and ended up saying it in response, within two weeks I ended up saying "I like you a lot but honestly I don't really know what love is yet".

Anyway, 3 months later I'm saying I love her but I don't really know if I love her? how do you know if you love someone or if you're just used to them?

She has subtly moved in with me by bringing clothes and makeup to my house, like I think our relationship is moving pretty fast and she is already talking about marriage and kids and shit. We've had some pregnancy scares and she honestly WANTS to be pregnant already, I don't understand this shit.

Again though, it's my first relationship and I don't really have anything else to compare with, i don't want her to be the only person i've ever had a relationship with but at the same time I don't really have a reason to break up with her, I guess I just want some opinions on the situation.
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>>16649808
>she says i love you in a week

If she does it with you she does it with other guys too, she has no idea what the fuck love is either to be spouting it out within a week, it's stupid, she doesn't know you, you could be a damn serial killer(not saying you really are). Don't ever take her seriously dude, please.

Well you have to love yourself to find love because the more you love yourself the more challenging it will be for a woman to really get involved into your life. When you love yourself, you don't settle for less. Love is when you love someone for who they really are on the inside, most importantly, realizing that looks fucking fade and that there are worse things than being alone, like getting your dick chopped off by an angry gf. Love takes a long time to develop because you don't take it fucking lightly that you could be living with this woman, having kids with this woman, marrying her and risking what you have with this woman. Ask yourself could you live with this bitch? Could she be a good mf motherfucking mother? Be careful.

This is what you do, you need to take charge, this girl don't know shit about love, don't give her any power, lay down the law and tell her what to do but NEVER forget to be appreciative of what she does for you. Grab her clothes and makeup, give them back to her ass. Don't say i love you it's an abused word, if you love her show her but you're only 19 and you've been together 4 months, you two should be going supppppppper slow, having small experiences together. If she act like a bitch let her know, if she act like a hoe let her know, don't say anything personal(that's why you got nasty ass stretch marks and you look ugly without makeup, NOOOO don't do that) you're just telling her what you've observe in her attitude(aka how she's acting), don't feel bad. She'll either admit she's wrong or leave, on your side you're going to have a bitch or a woman who respects you. If you let it slide, you'll get no respect.
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>>16645072

get a grip beta.
>>
>>16643832

relationship goals indeed.
>>
>>16643832
>How old are you guys?
24 me, her 20
>How long have you been talking/dating?
4.5 months
>How would you describe each other as a person?
she's open minded, says what she thinks, has some sort of aura that when you're near her you're filled with happiness, you just have to smile, it's easy to talk to her because of that openness of hers ( don't know a word to describe it )
>How often do you see each other or go on a date?
3,4 days every 3 weeks because 150 miles
>How often to you text and talk otp?
daily texting, the other see above

first of all, we met through some fitness related page, talked and decided to meet up.
first "date" we had sex, unplanned, but we both felt it was the right thing to do.
so we continued to see each other for the next 4.5 months.

the closer we got the more thoughts of her thinking about her ex came and the week before christmas she told me it's over.
her reason? " i just couldn't get over the guilt i'd feel if i'd gave us a chance when i didn't give my ex one"
whole lot of bullshit, because she told me in the beginning, that she met up with her ex ( they were together for 3 years, broke up about half a year ago ) talked with him, even slept with him but didn't feel a thing like she remembered it.

for christmas she gave me a christmas card saying "looking forward to seeing you" and "i really like you", the box decorated with drawings and stuff, a lot of effort put in.

after christmas we talked, she told me she's back with her ex.
the whole time it sounded like she was obligated to try it with him again "he probably always was the one for me" her words

2 days later she texted me "how's it going?" "you still working out?"
this shit has continued for the last couple of days, i answer in the shortest way possible and she tries to communicate with me.

is it because she's missing something in her ex that i have or what?
she played with me in the end, using my feelings, i told her that and she tried to apologize.
>>
>>16651934

If she has sex on the first date, she's doing that with alot of other guys too.

Well simply she's likely just playing the both of you, her ex has something you don't have and you have something the ex doesn't have, plus the ex lives next to her i presume. Imagine you left to text her for 3 weeks and her ex bf is a min away and very convenient Long distance is a no no, if not the ex, plenty of guys are bound to hit on her to point she says, why do i even put up with this when i can see a guy near by, i turned down so many handsome guys. You're not going to move nor is she going to move so that makes it worse, the longer the days go by the more she regrets.

Why she's talking to you after the break up? Probably to get you to chase her, no strings attached. Have her cake and eat it too, have two ex guys and go out and have one night stands with other guys without too much guilt of not "hurting you two but" but guilt of looking like a slut.

Another thing to think about, is that she likely did like you and got turned off by something you did, then she guess she'd just use you as a boy toy. Only the strong survive my friend, after all. You did say she was very open minded and says whatever she wants, who wore the pants in that relationship?
>>
>>16643832

Yummy ass.
>>
>>16643832

How do you get over a girl?
Thread replies: 42
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