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Anonymous
100% sobriety or some leeway?
2016-07-18 17:10:29 Post No. 17369200
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100% sobriety or some leeway?
Anonymous
2016-07-18 17:10:29
Post No. 17369200
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Hi /adv/
Some story for context.
From 18-21 (current 23) i slowly developed some heavy alcoholism, laying around all day amounting to nothing etc..
I got myself a gf who was super active, we worked out alot and she was a good influence on my habits, got a job during this time which i still hold. I was an active alcoholic though. I was pretty much just a mindless bitch with no opinions, drivers license, alot of free time and a dick, so she found me convenient and dumped me when she felt like something else a year later.
When she broke up i felt like change, i thought id do a week without alcohol and the resulting mess was HELL. The physical changes and mental anguish i experienced when i quit convinced me to make a new years promise not to drink the whole year. It was a huge success. Ive never been happier and more balanced in my life, i was an outright superman, man. Habits where those of astronauts. When the year had passed i started drinking at parties and such again and i still dont feel like alcohol is an issue.
>I think that ive merely replaced it with weed though.
For 3-4 months my majority of days have ended with weed, im not going out as much, im not cooking as well or as often, exercise sporadically and rarely.. a whole host of generally lazy attitudes have developed recently. My dealer is a friend now, i sort of go to him just for the company sometimes.
My question to you is this: can you ever balance these things if you demonstrably had an issue before? Am i simply an addict and need to abstain? I actually dislike alcohol a little bit now, i get headaches easily and i really only drink for social occasions. Weed has become a blatant issue however, ive seen this shit before in another form.
Weed does fit me better and i would love to be able to indulge a bit now and then. Taking everything off the table was never something i was ready to do, im still young and i still feel the urge to experiment.
I wonder if i need to make a permanent decision.
