I'm not expecting her to reply I'm at peace with what I said. Just want to know what she ment by me having feelings for the idea of her ?
>>17367948
She might have thought that you just started having feelings for her, or that you only like the way she (insert action here). She's may also be in the Nile and in shock of your confession, with this being a flighty response.
>>17367948
Pic related
Sounds like she is trying to low-key get rid of you.
>>17367948
Funny. I wonder if she frequents this board hecause I constantly tell people this.
You don't like/love the real her, you love the "her" that you've whipped up in your head. Like people who love celebrities or famous politicians - it's your idea of them, NOT the real them. You like what you THINK and WANT them to be. The version of them in your head isn't the real them, they both just look thr same in visual appearance. This is absolutely true with like 90% of people with oneitis. The fact that you've had these feelings for so long just gave you.more time to develope a more thorough, deeply routed, distorted idea of her. Moreso, it allowed you to feel as though you need to have jer in some way, or else all yhat time you spent thinking about her was wasted.
She's probably right to be completely honest. I usually yake the guys side and call the woman a cunt, but she seems pretty reasonable and down to earth. You should take her advice.
>>17367959
We use to have a thing 3 years ago she was my first love and my first real kiss. We have been good friends for 6 years
>>17367966
I feel it
>>17367973
Very good response and ideology but I've seen her in every way possible the ugly the good the bad the really bad and my feeling yet to fade.
It's definitely either >>17367973 or >>17367966
but I would say it's most likely >>17367973. Good for both of you for handling this like mature adults though.
>>17367987
Well in that case just do what she says, give it some time, and then get back to her.
>>17367992
Should I reply to her telling her I'll take her up on her offer?
>>17367998
Nah, man. Just ghost her for now. Don't even message her when the time is up. Wait a week or two after that and see if she messages you first. Demonstrate to her that you.think about other things than her.
>>17368065
Thanks man wish I could repay all of you bros for your advice. I'll check back in with you guys in 28 days about this. I know none of you but you carry a place in my heart for being here for me.
>>17367948
>the idea of
God damn it. When will this shitty phrase end?
>>17368131
It's from an old movie, and it was referenced on family guy so kids still hear it from time to time.
>re assess
>>17368195
Oh shit it was on Family Guy? It's been a while, but that makes sense.
It's from Freedom writers apparently. I thought it was from something old
Either way, people just say it because they can't say, "You care more about our relationship than about me."
>>17367948
More often than most of us are willing to admit, we impose an ideal image on someone we're attracted to, and fall in love with it rather than the real person. Then either we're shocked and disappointed when the reality turns out to differ from the dream, or the other person wilts under the burden of trying to be the dream and not themselves.
>>17368699
What the solution here?
>>17368195
It can be traced back to ancient greek philosophy (Platon, possibly Socrates), where everything is split up in a dualistic worldview in which the "idea" of things are unachievable ideals, but they have an earthly, materialistic dimension.
Platon also applies this philosophy to love, where people at first fall in love with the earthly, sexual side of the other person but in time can come to love the idea of this person - not just their flesh but their "mind" if you will. This is explained more thoroughly in Platon's "Symposium".
>>17369847
So would that just make everyone and everything an idea
>>17369975
That guy fucked ip.
According to Platon there are 2 worlds; the physical world and the world of ideas.
Ideas are the perfect representation of things and the physical things are an atempt to reach that perfection, but will never reach it.
I have no idea what the second message is trying to say, it's like a child wrote it.
>>17367948
Dont do what she said, in 21 days say you still like her.
>when I was 17 some girl said this to me "you like the idea of me, but not really me"
>most autistic thing, I said no, listed all the traits I liked about her
>kept pursuing
>fucked her
>broke up with her after
lmao. I hate women.
>>17367948
The whole idea of her thing is about what she preciseness as your preconceived notions of who she is instead of who she actually is. Tl;dr she thinks you like her because you see her as x when she knows that she's y.
Should op wait the 21 days ? Currently in a situation like this.
>>17367948
>offence
Both of you should drink battery acid
>>17370054
Sounds like she was right though.
>>17367948
context is needed she can't just say you like the idea of her unless you were giving off that vibe, ie praising how much of a good person she is, etc
it sounds like she has your best interests in mind and probably saying that because you were clingy or shit (hinted by the reflect on yourself and spend time with friends part). either way, good friend.
