I had a fight with my gf and I want your guys opinions if I overreacted
>Gf always calls me from her work on break
>Her male coworkers are always saying shit in the background to mess with her, cause she told them I'm easily made jealous
>Usually she ignores it
>2 or 3 times, they've said something and she starts giggling so much that she isn't paying attention to what I'm saying
>I feel like a cuck, sitting there while my gf takes a minute to calm down from laughing at other dudes joking/messing with her
>We talked about it tonight, I said I feel disrespected
>She says "you know I don't mean it in a bad way" and I say "If I had did that with you on the phone, would it be okay?" and she avoids the question
Now shes ignoring me. I don't think I was overly aggressive, i just said basically that I think its rude and I feel disrespected, I said I'd like for her to speak with me the way that she'd like me to speak with her. Am I wrong for being upset about this
You've become a workroom joke essentially. She finds the scenario cute or funny. You're not wrong for being upset about it really, but it honestly isn't that big of a deal. Who gives a fuck about her coworkers
Dump her, she's probably fucking and sucking those thirsty fucks as we speak.
you're not wrong for being upset about this. but if she is going to be childish like this for some shit that obviously upsets you, you need to let her do her thing then. don't ever let someone who is supposed to care about you disrespect you.
speaking from experience, those guys don't care about your relationship and are not going to respect that and the fact that she is talking shit about you to them denotes a lack of respect she already had for you.
basically, let her ignore you. you do the same shit right back desu. only for good reason.
>>17365064
she wasn't necessarily talking shit about me. They asked specifically "whos the jealous one of the relationship" and she said "him, but I get jealous too at times". Its true enough, but maybe she shouldn't have said anything?
They do this shit to provoke you. And it's working. By making a big deal out of this, you're not helping yourself. Her reaction wasn't very mature, but you're not exactly right to be THIS jealous.
Maybe just a bit but she is also in the wrong for just straight up ignoring you when you are upset.
>>17365067
You're going to have to accept you can't control what she says about you when you aren't there. Either you trust her, or you don't.
>>17365076
all I want is for her to show me more respect on the phone. I know she isn't there talking shit about me, and she can't control what they say, but its just that the way she reacts to it just encourages them and makes me feel disrespected.
>>17365079
I trust her as far as not cheating on me. I just don't appreciate just how comfortable her coworkers are messing with her/us. but most of all, I don't appreciate the way she reacts to it.
>>17365049
You're being cucked and those guys are LITERARY laughing at you because of it
>>17365049
just stop picking your phone up when shes on her break, she will get the message.
>>17365095
Thats what I was thinking. I was going to just say "okay your coworkers won, we just won't talk anymore when you're at work" but maybe thats a bit much?
>>17365090
>all I want is for her to show me more respect on the phone. I know she isn't there talking shit about me, and she can't control what they say, but its just that the way she reacts to it just encourages them and makes me feel disrespected.
Then ask her to step away from them when she's talking to you. Why can't you go one work day without talking to each other anyway? I can't see any reason you have to talk to her on the phone when she's at work
>>17365133
she enjoys calling me on her break.
She usually goes to the break room, and other employees are always going in and out of there. Sometimes those shit guys are there and sometimes they aren't.
>>17365104
Don't tell her. Just do it.
>>17365143
That doesn't change any of my advice. Ask her to go elsewhere when she calls you. And stop being so jealous, jealousy is unattractive and you'll destroy your relationship if you're so jealous that you can't stand her even working with other guys.
Oh, and get off 4chan too, because I guarantee you that it's contributed to how you feel like a 'cuck'
>>17365155
na I can't just ignore her man, not unless she actually does some serious shit
>>17365157
You're completely right and shes talked to me about it before. I try to pick my battles now as far as jealousy goes, and really all I wanted was an apology and that she'd handle the situation differently. But she just said "you know I don't mean it that way" and "you're just being mean/jealous" etc.
>>17365168
>You're completely right and shes talked to me about it before. I try to pick my battles now as far as jealousy goes, and really all I wanted was an apology and that she'd handle the situation differently. But she just said "you know I don't mean it that way" and "you're just being mean/jealous" etc.
What did you expect her to say? What should she apologise for? She was reacting normally to banter and wasn't wrong with what she did say to you. The reason this whole situation is an issue lies with you and your jealous.
>>17365176
I felt like it was disrespectful to call me and then ignore what I'm saying because shes laughing over other guys. I just sit there waiting. and then she'll say "what was it you said?". and if I ask why shes laughing, she'll say "nothing" and as we're talking, shes like bursting with little giggles again. It starts to test my patience and make me upset
>>17365185
Then say something like "I guess you're busy, I'll leave you to it" and end the call. Keep doing that until she stops.
>>17365190
That's almost what I do. I always say "okay I'm going to hang up" and then she'll say "no no don't!" and she'll stop laughing immediately and she'll tell me what was going on.
How the fuck do you people deal with this shit? She's a cunt and you're pussy-whipped to be her bitch.
>>17365196
>That's almost what I do. I always say "okay I'm going to hang up"
You forgot to explain WHY you're hanging up. It's because she's busy trying to carry on multiple conversations at once, which is the major crux of the problem.
Also sounds like she enjoys attention. Attention from you (especially when you get jealous and feel possessive of her) and attention from other guys who try to distract her and vie for her attention when she's on the phone with you.
Does she seek attention in other contexts? Does ever seem to provoke you or others (not belligerently, but even in teasingly or in a very flirty way) just to illicit a response?
>>17365049
Jealousy is a pussy emotion. There's no point to it. If your girl gives you a reason to break up, dump her. Otherwise, ignore all the bullshit.
>>17365049
What? Fuck the CoWorkers, your girl still calls you at lunch?
>>17365911
>there's no point to it
There's no point to anything
not an arguement
>>17365900
She knows why he wants to hang out, she just chooses to disrespect him.
>>17365196
I cannot understand why you put up with this shit. Just cannot. If the bitch did that to me I would hang up and not take any more of her calls. She is a fucking cunt let her fuck her coworkers
>>17365900
>she's busy trying to carry on multiple conversations at once
what? she calls him while around all these guys then participates in making fun of him. He should tell her a fucking thing except by bitch. Where are mens balls?
>>17365933
>She knows why he wants to hang out, she just chooses to disrespect him.
Playing this, "I know you know why" game is being passive aggressive and dramatic. He needs to actually confront what's actually happening.
When you say exactly what you want/don't want, tell them, and they do it anyway, there's absolutely no room for bullshit like there is when you just act upset and expect the other party to know why you're upset and understand that they're never do that thing again.
Grow a spine, stop being dramatic, and actually lay down some boundaries and expectations.
>>17365969
He did that already, it's on the OP.
>>17365049
What's the point of being in a relationship with someone who doesn't put you before everyone else? Leave her. You can do better, but you can't do better while you're with her.
>>17365969
>Grow a spine, stop being dramatic, and actually lay down some boundaries and expectations.
This, honestly.
I'd tell her, straight up, no bullshit, that it bothered me when she called me and we were barely able to talk without her giggling at her coworkers. If, after I'd made that very clear (not aggressively or issuing ultimatums, just laying down how I felt), it kept happening, then the next time a conversation got derailed by them I'd just say "look, I'll talk to you later" and hang up.
Your mentality should not be "DISRESPECTFUL WHORE, I WILL PUNISH YOU", just "I've told you how frustrating this is for me, I'm tired of it, bye."
>>17365049
I'd dump.
Here's why:
Even if she's not cheating you, she openly lets you be disrespected by her coworkers. She already talked shit about you to them (who does that) and it's obvious she likes the attention they give her.
The "harmless joking" she thinks this is, clearly hurts your feelings and she doesn't give a fuck.
Be with someone who respects you. Not someone who makes you feel belittled.
>>17365067
I wouldn't really be OK with this. As far as I'm concerned any serious personal question about your SO/your relationship should always be met with "That's our business, sorry." That's privileged information, not for commoners (i.e. everybody but the two of you and your kids, should you ever have any.) That's how I live and how I expect my girlfriend to live and I think it works pretty well, but I'm not saying it's for everybody.
Don't take advice from the cucks who say you're in the wrong here, I am not saying you are a perfect apple (since I don't know you at all)
But as others have said, the fact that she lets out such information is wrong on Its own, now, you can't control and shouldn't try to control another person's action (To a certain extent), the guys at her work-place are not the ones you should be mad at, it was her who caused this, her actions CLEARLY DICTATE that she does not care for privacy and/or more than comfortable with those guys to tell them things about her "PRIVATE" relationship (If you didn't get it by now - It's not private at all anymore)
If you will end this relationship Its not for the cucks at her work place, Its for her making bad choices which personally would tell me she is not a person I want to be with, and yes mistakes are made and can be forgiven but this is over the line, you're better with someone who has the terms "Privacy" ingrained in their brain better than this particular girl.
>>17366052
Also to add to my post, the fact that her COWORKERS are trying to provoke you shows just how much disrespect is coming from her direction for ALLOWING THIS TO HAPPEN.
Oh, and laughing about it? wow, she is a shameful human being and shouldn't have a relationship with someone monogamous at all.
Go be with a girl who's REALLY monogamous and then you will see how you're not as jealous as you think you are - this girl is just the opposite of monogamous and that is why you act this way.
>>17366052
>>17366060
Protip: never take advice from anybody seriously uses the word "cuck", let alone multiple times per post.
I'm not defending your girlfriend, because her behavior is disrespectful and you shouldn't put up with it, but that >cuck cuck cuck shit is pure poison.
You can demand fidelity from your partner, remain alert for any red flags & respond to them appropriately without swallowing 4chan's particularly ugly brand of relationship neuroticism.
>>17366080
It sounds like a sick relationship , and if he wants to get anywhere in life he needs to terminate it, else he will always feel "mediocre" with such a girl, but it seems your standards are different and you'd rather put up with this, imo this kind of disrespect is too far.
