I'm a mid twenties guy that is just getting his shit together for once.
I'm making positive changes and seriously challenging myself after being depressed for years.
I woke up one day and something just clicked when I had a thought about someone in my head.
All of a sudden I felt this huge weight in my chest that forced me out of my chair and I literally didn't feel apathy for once in a very long time.
I have accepted the fact that there is something I want to live for. There is just one thing. Among this sudden and unexpected turn around, I realized something.
I'm a slob. A pig. I look like garbage and all my clothing is old and worn. My hair seems to be already receding and I don't want to accept it.
I have cleaned myself up. I shaved and got a haircut.
It's very important that I don't look away from my trials and hard ships right now.
I would never share this with anyone I know but I am just unattractive. I'm not an attractive guy.
I have to face myself but the pain of being physically ugly, is vile.
I don't believe in the fairy tale that looks are not that important. They very much are so.
How do you deal with the pain associated with accepting yourself wholly?
There is only so much I feel I can do. Though, it must be done. I just wish it didn't hurt so much.
>>17346048
>How do you deal with the pain associated with accepting yourself wholly?
Why accept yourself wholly?
Only by not being satisfied with yourself will make you change yourself (for the better or worse).
The only true way to accept yourself is work towards that goal where it became acceptable.
>>17346055
Yeah, you have a point.
I should have said "How do you accept things you can not change about yourself?"
Sorry, this is stupid.
>>17346059
It's not stupid unless you neglect to follow the path you're discovering by your revelation.
It's all about learning to let go. Mindfulness and careful examination of thoughts and emotions that arise in the moment.
You are more than your appearances, and although you are within your right to continuously believe that looks are important, you don't have to pour your energy into conserving those beliefs. If it's an objective truth, your change of attitude towards the matter won't affect any outer reality - but it will change your inner reality
>inb4 zen philosophy, inner and outer are the same, only appear to be seperated by the illusion of duality
If you manage to change your inner reality, it will affect how other people see you, and it will results in opportunities that can't be matched by your past experiences.
When you feel uneasy or depressed, ask yourself to welcome the thoughts and feelings, and sit with them for a while. If you can welcome (accept) what arises, move in to asking yourself if you also can welcome the need to influence, stop, start, or in any way change what you are experiencing. Can you welcome the need to keep it at a distance, or holding it close, protecting your vulnerability from the rest of the world? If you can, can you also welcome the sense and belief that what you are experiencing is who you are, or got anything to do with your total being? Will you still be you, if those feelings didn't arise?
Can you let it go?
Will you let it go?
And if so, when?
The Sedona Method
