How do I give people online and irl really good advice? I wish I was better at helping people and preventing suicide but I only make them worse because I'm Aspie so I find it hard to relate.
Example of advice I give pretty often here: People here have a big problem with being virgins at 25+. I tell them sometimes that they only care because they regret not having sex in youth but sex isn't a necessity and sexual passion comes and goes so you've really lost nothing from being a virgin. Also people who have a problem with being ugly, I tell them not to value themselves on their appearance.
Being able to give good advice comes from wisdom, and this usually comes from a combination of life experience, introspection, and critical thinking.
The problem with this board is that the majority of the posters lack every last one of these characteristics.
Ask them questions about how they feel, draw out the details and the why. Ask about what they would want instead. Sometimes what they want, and how they think things should be don't actually mesh well and are based on some false assumptions. Point that out if it's the case. If it's not, help them build a plan to get where they want.
After that, there's only so much you can do. You can't help someone who would rather defend their beliefs than come to a solution.
>>17345855
I have no wisdom but how can I be kind? if not being wise then at least being kind will go a long way
>>17345888
that's why I am wondering about being kind and how that will effect them, though I can't progress with advice.
seem interested, ask questions, etc. If they think you want to know they'll open up more.
Imagine yourself in their position and think of the most convienient and logical solution that YOU would want and apply it to their situation.
>>17345901
You can be kind by having empathy and respect towards the person you're giving advice to.
sounds like you try to help them to "get over being a virgin" instead of motivating them to take things into their own hands and start getting their shit together.
people need empathy and then a kick in the ass
