Just try some new things with her, mix it up a bit. You're bother comfortable, so don't worry about asking to do some weird shit, like choking.

this is the perfect chance for a threesome OP
next time she says 'shes so hot' blatanly suggest the menage a trois

dont you dare fail me OP

>>17326913
Hey OP my gf is like that too, but she gets really shy and upset when i ask her if she is bi.

I'm also interested in how many girls are actually secretly bi. I read a study claiming the majority of 'straight' girls are aroused by lesbian porn when tested. Girls do naturally seem to adore their other female friends.

Any fems able to shed light here?

>>17326913
> We barely ever have sex (twice a week if I'm very lucky)

That becomes the norm after a while op.

>>17326930
Agreed, but your relationship might change and you guys could break up depending on how eye opening the experience might be for her.

>>17326913
Bring in another girl?

>>17326913
I'm more surprised you take a broad to paris who isn't touching your dick on the regular

>>17326957

I figured, but it has always been like that from the very beginning. I just assumed she was a low libido girl, but maybe it has something to do with all of this.

>>17326949

Mine just gets straight up pissed off with me, like I've committed some kind of crime by suggesting it.

>>17326930

I once had a dumb highschooly 'i luv u so much' conversation with her where I told her I wouldn't be comfortable with another girl touching her like that and she agreed with me. I mean, it was ages ago but I'm fairly sure she'll know something is up if I pull a 180 like that.

>>17326950

I've heard this too, actually, so maybe it's something like this and she actually has no interest in other girls.

Then again, IMO the fact that my gf will cum in seconds to lesbian porn but finds the concept of straight porn disgusting even when she's turned on is a little bit of a red flag to me.

>>17326969

We went there together, like hell I'm going to pay for all of her travel expenses, I can barely even support myself. We studentlyf. Also, Paris does wonders for the dick touching I found.

>>17326913
Lol op, are you 12? Your line of thinking is so immature. Twice a week is pretty average for a chick. As far as, is she lez? Are you retarded? Most girls nowadays are turned on lesbian porn because pretty much that's what gets the most exposure. Additionally, girls are groomed now that certain things are considered "hot." Your girlfriend is normal. You, are just ignorant.

>>17326950
>Any fems able to shed light here?
As far as I know, women are more sexually flexible at least in terms of turn ons and can get aroused by basically anything sexually charged. (http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/12/fashion/12bisex.html?_r=1) If you don't want to read or look through the article, it includes lesbian footage but also bonobos mating.

On top of this, in western society the female body is depicted as more desirable than the male body. Naked or scantily clad women are everywhere, male sexual taste is fed to you all the time including in stuff like blockbusters, where the most "idealizing" image of men is typically them doing something heroic, whereas there is usually a flattering shot of tits or just the female form. Our sense of beauty is in part determined by biology/genetics (we find youth and marks of health attractive, and people genetically dissimilar to us) but also partly by culture. People also start to appreciate and value things more the more they see them, this is called the mere-exposure effect if you want to look it up, and also responsible for people so often falling for people they interact with or even just see on a regular basis. So if you have spent at least fifteen conscious years taking in footage of beautiful women being portrayed as sexy, it seems no more than logical to me that it would spark any possible latent bicuriosity and make girls more open to the idea of experimenting.
What also helps is that bisexual women are often portrayed as sort of "kinky straight" women (sadly so for genuine bisexuals) who are seen as both normal and extra sexy to straight men... which makes it more inviting to, for example, try making out with a friend. If you don't like it very much, it will still put you in a hot position in front of others and the rumor won't hurt.

>>17326984

Calm down friend, twice a week on AVERAGE is still way below how regularly a young couple will typically have sex. We don't do the dirty twice a week on average. In fact the time before I got laid yesterday was two weeks prior to that. She's 21, I'm 20. This is supposed to be the most sexually active period of her life.

Lesbian pron getting the most exposure shouldn't count for shit for a girl who has never seen a porn scene in her life. I am aware of the social conditioning of what is considered attractive. I am also aware that girls in particular are not supposed to find those standards SEXUALLY attractive, which my girlfriend obviously does.

>>17327005
As for the friendships, women can be very physically affectionate, but that's not that abnormal. In western society male friendships are rather physically restricted, and in many other countries there are other norms regarding this. In a country like India, it is perfectly normal for two male friends to walk around holding hands, just to name something, and in Turkey friendly guys meet by pressing their temples together like a variation on cheek kisses. So I would not necessarily deem this a sign that women have an ulterior motive. (Though speaking from experience, I have been involved in situations like this where I felt that my friend was platonic, but I found it pretty hot.)

As for OP, past the honeymoon phase once to twice a week is really not exceptionally little. It's not a sign of a high sex drive, perhaps a bit below average for a young girl who's not stressed out by kids, but nothing out of the ordinary.
It is also fairly common for girls to enjoy lesbian porn because it focuses more on female pleasure than straight porn. Usually this is also staged and the girls are not that into girls (which is why actual lesbians/bisexuals typically shun professional girl on girl porn), but there is a lot of touching, there's oral... it's more cutesy and sensual than pounding and hard blowjobs with the girl crying out like a banshee. So many women like the lesbian shit because it is softer.

Having said that, what does stand out to me is that your girlfriend completely clamps up when it comes to talking about it - that, and the needing porn to get off. Is she open about other kinks or fantasies? Does she generally do okay with discussing sex normally?

>>17327006
>This is supposed to be the most sexually active period of her life.
Not to discard the rest of your post, but this is not true. I'm not sure about men, and the thing about female libido peaking at an older age is generally a myth (at least physically), but it is true that many women start to enjoy sex more when they get older because they lose inhibitions and become less insecure about their body. Men also tend to last longer as they age, and acquire more of a taste for foreplay and stuff like oral, rather than wanting to just jackhammer like many horny teens and adolescents often do.

>>17327024

She's very shy about sex in general, but she normally seems okay with me talking about it with her (even if she doesn't say much back). If I mention the lesbian videos in any context other than 'do you want to watch one' she gets very annoyed with me.

She has no kinks as far as I'm aware. I don't think she thinks about sex much at all. Like I said, I'm fairly sure she's a relatively low libido girl.

She's also always hated giving head. I know that's not outstanding or anything, but she's never enjoyed it at all and now that I'm thinking about this, I guess that COULD have something to do with it.

>>17327066
Hmm. I don't think you're paranoid for thinking that she could be a lesbian, or more into girls anyway. How does she act about you during sex? Does she touch your body spontaneously, look you in the face at crucial moments, is she eager about touching your dick or feeling your boner against her body?
If the answer to all of this is no, and especially if she seems to withdraw during sex (like if you're having sex and she's not watching porn, she'll close her eyes and sort of retreat to her happy place) that does sound like she is not attracted to you as a man.

Either way, you have voiced several things here (she does not initiate, she does not share turn ons or talk about sex, she isn't up for sex as often as you'd like, now there's the thing with needing the porn to get off) that depict your sex life as unfulfilling. You do not "need" her to have a real motive in order to not be happy with your sexual relationship, and that is a serious issue in itself.

At this point (provided she is unenthusiastic during as well) I would sit her down and talk to her seriously but not in an accusing manner (that will only make her either defensive or shut down). Say that you made several observations about your sex life (leave out the lesbian porn, stick to things happening between the two of you) and ask her as neutrally as possible "I sometimes feel like you are not sexually attracted to me, could I be onto something there?" If she says no, encourage her to tell you whether she recognizes what you're saying, does she experience it similarly or differently? What would she say is the reason - in case she aknowledges it?
Basically try to help her as one person who cares about another to unravel what's happening in her head when it comes to sex with you, with the understanding that it's loaded and uncomfortable for her.

>>17327115
As for you, you don't need an excuse to leave her. Whether she is gay or not, there's obviously some discomfort there and I think you should respect her and that. But that doesn't equal that you should stay with her if you don't feel happy with the way things are and she shows no signs of considering (trying to) change.

>>17327066
Or maybe she was doing that other stuff to impress you and now she's just sick of dealing with your immature ass. You act like you know better, but honestly you don't know shit op.
Boohoo, i think my gf is gay. Lol seriously????

>>17327115
Also should clarify that preferring to keep her eyes closed in itself is not a big deal, plenty of people do because it heightens other senses. But the combination of not touching you, shying away from your dick and not looking for eye contact or being able to see your body would be worrysome.

>>17326913
Sound like a lesbian to me. Were her parents the authoritative repressive type who would have disowned her if she'd shown an interest in women?

>>17327143

Is this bait? I really can't even tell lmao

>>17327115

How she acts is up to how 'turned on' I can get her. I always lead, and she will sometimes act totally uninterested (like she's trying to make it clear she's only agreeing because she thinks I want to), but if I bring it up with her or suggest that maybe we don't continue it just gets worse. It has always been like this.

> Does she touch your body spontaneously, look you in the face at crucial moments, is she eager about touching your dick or feeling your boner against her body?

If she is very turned on then she does all of this. If she isn't then she does almost none of this. Exception being she's always up for intercourse (while we're already going through the motions) which she can't finish from, but she still enjoys quite a lot.

> Either way, you have voiced several things here... that depict your sex life as unfulfilling.

I know, and it has been our biggest problem as a couple. She is aware of it and partly agrees with me that she should have more desire (or even the desire to act like she has), but she doesn't know how to do it. I believe she really wants to be more sexually active with me, but maybe she is too stressed?

> ask her as neutrally as possible "I sometimes feel like you are not sexually attracted to me, could I be onto something there?"

I've said things like this before to her, not over the porn or anything. It almost always makes her turn very sour and resentful and she swears blind that she is, even if I tell her that she doesn't seem to act like it.

> ... and she shows no signs of considering (trying to) change.

I believe she is trying to change, or at least she tells me and wants me to believe that she is. I have no evidence to support it other than her word after 3 years I suppose, but they haven't been the least stressful of years.

>>17327152

Her dad is very conservative, racist and homophobic. But he is very old and her whole family resents him for it. He might want to be authoritative, but he has lost all respect from their family.

>>17327199
It's a tough one. On the one hand it is normal to be more engaged and fiery when you're really turned on, on the other hand it is not that normal for her to not be into touching you if she's just "regularly" turned on.

Also her response when you question her attraction to you. I mean, if you feel very attracted to your partner and hear this, in a healthy relationship the first response would be worry and shock. "Don't you realize that? Don't I make you feel desired?"
That she turns sour could just be her getting defensive and fired up because it is untrue. But it seems a bit off to me, especially a combination of becoming angry and not changing any of her behavior.

Honestly I don't want you to attach too much value to this because I don't know her or your relationship dynamic the way you do, but from everything you've said my guess would be that she's indeed not that into men. That's mostly gathered from the recurring pattern of her shutting you down and/or sabotaging things if you bring up specific concerns. That sounds to me like she is hard in denial and she gets angry because the things you mention force her to become (somewhat?) aware of that. But it also sounds like even if this is the case, she still has too much issues with her sexuality to potentially admit it to herself.

And not to be too much of a downer (too late I guess), but saying that she wants to change for three years without results and without open discussion or accepting critical observations... is not that promising.

>>17327211
Maybe so, but I'm sure he beat that shit into her (possibly literally) at an early age. Girls dating girls and guys dating guys is wrong, fags are going to hell, homsexuality is spitting in gods eye, blah blah blah dumb shit. Little kids internalize stuff like that sometimes. Of course it might turn her into a repressed lesbian.

And of course, if that's the case, she's gonna deny it, possibly to her own death, because of how internalized all the stigma her father associated with homosexuality has become to her. She might literally think she's a bad person for having these feelings, but in the context of something you two are doing to improve your heterosexual sex life she's free to do whatever she wants because she's not gay if she's watching gay porn for her boyfriend. Ya dig?

>>17327254

I dig. She and her family are as liberal as it gets, so it is hard for me to imagine her internalizing that sort of stuff. I think if anything her family is polarized against his views because of how he acts.

>>17327261
Not them but you have to realize that if her father is so anti-gays, she probably realized that before she even developed a political stance. And for a child the idea that your parent would reject you and find you bad is just terrible beyond any logical argument. There's no perspective, you depend on your parents completely.

You and you girlfriend sound like my husband and I

>>17327261
>it is hard for me to imagine her internalizing that sort of stuff
Anything's possible. It may not even be her father's doing, just straight denial about her own sexuality for whatever reason.

Either way, it honestly sounds like your girlfriend is repressed sexually, whether she's straight or bi or gay or anything. The fact that she doesn't like talking about sexuality is a red flag for this sort of thing.

>>17327277

Do you think you have any bisexual/lesbian tenancies? Do you think that if you do, it has harmed your attraction for your husband?

Or did you mean that comment in a totally different way?

>>17327311
I'm way more likely to stare at women or call them hot than men, yes. I've never really looked at any man and been automatically attracted to him; in the past it's been their personalities that attract me first. However, I tend to be annoyed by most women.

As far as my husband, I'm 100% happy with him. We fit together so perfectly that I know with all my heart no one else could even come close. Even if I'm not very attracted physically, our emotional and romantic connection is great enough to overcome that. Looks fade eventually, anyway.

Bump for interest

>>17326913
As a woman who loves women. That bitch loves women. Sorry, pal.

>>17326913
Porn isn't a good judge of what really turns people on. I watch two dudes fucking all the time, but if I saw that in real life I would be disgusted.

>>17326950
I've watched lesbian porn simply for the fact that most women in the videos know what they're doing. Any time I watch porn with men, they don't focus on foreplay (or if they do, it's quick and pointless things).

Lots of rubbing and frotting is always nice, also teasing and caressing. But I'm still inevitably attracted to men, but most don't know how to do anything besides stick their dick in you and expect you to get off.

op can't you talk to her about it?
I mean you don't have to be direct about it,
how much time you with her?maybe you don't know all her history wellwe need more details or this a bait.

jumping in conclusion because you mentally thinking about it but you not sure if it really the case can have consequences if you will act without thinking,lgbt board probaly would have sage you she a bi and that she will one day dump you,it can happen,but can't you talk to her or give her some time before you act,it's not that she cheat on you,but in your head you think she will.

>>17327143
Retarded bait