>went to England from USA to be with my British gf
>She dumps me a week in
Besides the fact that it's a horrible situation, I've got 7.5 grand in my bank and no commitments to anywhere or anything, financial or otherwise. Should I go back to the states and regroup/take time to heal, or should I go and explore Europe for a bit? I'm completely heartbroken and lost right now. Pic unrelated, just a drawing of mine I took a picture of on my phone
7.5 grands will get you nowhere in western europe. Instead of burning it all on a very frugal 2-3 month trip where you're out of cash in the end, go back to america and get your shut together.
Do you have any remaining contact with your gf or her family? If she isnt a total bitch, she should feel responsible for helping you in some way.
>>17318952
Go back to the US. Travel a bit if you want, but you can't stay there indefinitely with no plan.
>>17318952
What is your usual preferred coping method? Do you prefer to seek solace in family and close friends, or do you prefer some time to yourself? Do you prefer a break from your usual routine, or to keep yourself busy with hobbies and work? Do you heal better with a bit of a hedonistic wallow or some dedicated self-improvement.
So those are your considerations, my two cents: Solo travel can be good after a breakup as you will have some fun new experiences and meet heaps of interesting people. I think in your situation though it's too soon, if it was me I'd just head home ASAP, take a few days/weeks to get my shit together, if I still wanted to travel I could do so at that point. Travelling, especially solo can be stressful and has big swings between high and low points which you probably aren't in a great situation to handle right now. Plus Western Europe is a popular destination for couples which is probably not something you want to be surrounded by right now.
Take advantage of it. Travel around Europe and see as much as you can. You can stay up to 3 months in the Schengen zone. So after you are done with the UK go to the mainland and have fun. Stay in hostels and hook up with other travelers.
how old are you? how coe you have no school or work commitment?
also, work on your linework and foreshortening.
OP here, I considered everyone's advice and I'm heading back to the states. I dunno how I'm gonna cope this time around, she felt like "the one". I booked a flight home, but I just dunno what I'm gonna do with myself. No breakup has ever left me feeling this listless.
To answer another question, I'm 23 and work in power line construction which pays very well and has a really fluid employment schedule. But I dont even want to work whrn I get home, I just want to wallow and die
>>17319059
There are a million articles out there on how to cope with breakups but the simple truth is break ups really suck ass and it's normal to feel like shit at the moment. If you need to take a bit of time to mourn that's totally fine. Eventually you'll need to start getting on with your life, whether that be going back to work, doing some travel, or partaking in some other kind of endeavour that requires you to get moving with something.
>>17318952
wow, what a bitch. making you come all that way and dumping you after a week. i would be so pissed off and hurt. but yeah, you should spend your time traveling and doing shit. wallowing in your pity will just makes things worse. did you at least speak on skype or the phone before coming to england? you cant really know someone though text.
Wed been seeing each other for a fee months in the states before i came over. She was incredibky excited for it at first but whrn i got there, she started geyting snappy, stressed, and depressed. I guess it was just different in England for her. I dont blame her, you cant help how you feel- but yeah, I definitely feel betrayed anf heartbroken. It was my decision to comr over to the uk, I guess it just ended up beinh to stressful and overwhelming for her
>>17318952
explore. at least a little bit. do it for yourself, anon. do it for me. do it all the anons that would love to travel europe but cannot.
I'm sorry buddy. Break ups are tough and I just went through one myself. You just need time to heal and to get out there and do stuff.
Im in the same boat op except that we lived in different cities in uk.She wanted to move in my city but I moved in hers because she has family in her city.And after a few months of living togehter she broke up with me and lives with her fsmily now until I have enough money to move out.She also found someo e else and I feel replaced and do t know what to do with myself I have no one and nothing except work
Dang OP Im sorry about your situation.
i like your drawing though. Teach me? :)
Here's a pic to cheer you up
>>17319059
don't lose that line of work in the fallout of your relationship, it sounds ideal for a 23-year-old. build up your savings and focus on yourself for a while
>>17318952
Stick to local girls next time OP
>>17318952
Fuck bro, go exploring Europe. I know that's what I'd be doing. Stay in Hostels, potentially get some strange.
I wish I were in your shoes, I'd be all over that fucking place Where's Waldo style.
>>17318952
Stay and live your life. Ive moved all over the us with less than 1000 each time. Its not as hard or expensive as everyone says.
>>17319392
>>17319392
I'll be going back to work on thursday because my old foreman was able to pull some strings, but I think my problem is I don't want to focus on me- I actively am in search of someone to love and to have love me. This girl and I were really awesome together and we had so many plans and ideas and conversations, and when she was in the states we had a blast together every time and she was always smiling and the sex was great- it was a fucking whirlwind and we really seemed to have fallen for each other. But as soon as I got to England, her mood slowly dropped and she got more stressed out and depressed and quick to anger. It wasn't anything either of us could control and it fucking sucked that it came to the boiling point like it did. So now, I'm sitting in a hotel I booked last minute waiting for a flight back to the states last minute and watching netflix, hating myself and second guessing everything I did and trying to see if anything I did contributed to what happened. I just want to fix it. I've tried talking to her about it and she just can't bring herself to try and I guess I don't blame her.
I just feel a really painful sensation in my chest and this is the first time a breakup has done that. This fucking sucks
**mat you please, kill yourself?**
>>17319019
He could do it, I think. Just focus on airbnb and hostels and cook your own food, maybe get a nice meal a few times a week. I travelled Western Europe for 2 months w/ my gf on £1250, took cheap trains, was fucked by the end of it.
I'd travel, OP. Seems you have solid employment working. Maybe not for 2-3 months if you're hurting, but go to the places in Europe you've always gone "wow" at.
In an LDR atm and this thread has terrified me.
>I'm in an LDR and this thread terrified me
unless your gf has the arm implant for birth control, I doubt it'll get as stupid as this got. Seriously, that thing fucked with her hormones and emotions and she got it a week before I came over-- so I'm sure it magnified and agitated whatever small fears and stresses she had about this situation to begin with. I tried convincing her it was the BC and that she should get it taken out and she'd feel normal again, but all this other stuff that's been bugging her- her bank screwing her over, living in a cramped house with her parents- just amplified it and she buried her head in the sand and it all ended when she got really really drunk, almost got me dragged into a fist fight outside a kebab shop, and then she just started to hysterically sob and said she couldn't do it anymore because of the stress and how miserable she'd been feeling.
tl;dr- stay the fuck away from hormonal birth control. It contributed to me losing the most important person I've met (so far, anyway.)
>>17320072
I'm gonna be strictly no BC w/ my gf as she seems to have hormonal issues. Sorry you had to go through this, anon.
You'll be alright - remember that. Repeat it. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders, just keep on keeping on.
Cool pic, btw.
>>17320236
It's okay man, she's agreed to talk to me about this whole thing one last time tonight- and I'll basically be bringing up all those points and hope that she's willing to maybe see the light, and that we can in fact work out. It'd be 100% worth it to eat the plane ticket's cost if she said she'd be willing to try again. Wish me luck, anons. I think that if she didn't have some part of her that wanted to try this whole thing again, she'd have just shut me down right then.
>>17320362
That's pathetic, have some self respect, suck it up and move on.
I would book a flight to central america somewhere and spend a couple of months backpacking and meeting people.
>>17320422
either she sees the proverbial light and we try again, or she doesn't and I just throw in the towel and go home. I don't see much pathetic with that- every time before this that we spoke about it, I've either been drunk off my ass or she's been drunk and hysterical. I think a sober talk about it logically might help smooth over some of this and convince her that it's just a bunch of bad timing that can be sorted out.
>>17320477
I honestly think that the worst thing that can happen to you right now is that she somehow agrees to try again and the same exact shit happens to you again later down the road.
I think going back to the states is a safe call, but try and have a bit of fun before going back. Go out to a pub, joke about America with the English, just have fun. If you do leave, at least do yourself the justice of not having a completely wasted trip.
>>17320508
as the kids say, yolo
>>17318952
Exit the Brexit.
>>17320477
This thread really scares me because I'm in a very similar situation, brit girl and being in europe, etc etc.
Only difference is I don't have much waiting for me back home.
Heck man try going to Paris for a few days, it's really nice to lose yourself in the museums every once in a while.
>>17319059
After having read this post, I suggest touring Western Europe. Just stay in hostels, see sights, meet people, have experiences and then head home with a clearer head.
>>17318952
Start de British-American mafia, you do this. You will smuggle the drugs, the girls, but especially de gun acause of guns in England is ban. Deals dey must be lucrative, you will survife by skin of your rooster. You become rich, expand into France, in German, Swiss, Spain, turn you 7 500 into 750 000 000 de girl wants you back but now you do not take her. The much hotter girls are in Europe anyway. You on most wanted list but dey do not catch you. Do this.
>>17318952
find out why, i would tell you to meet someome even sweeter than her so you can stop missing her, but if you dont know why she dumped you then its bound to happen again.
7500 (bucks I presume?) sounds like a good amount to have lots of fun. I took a week long trip in three western Europe countries for about 300 bucks in total.
Use couchsurfing, blablacar, cheap airlines, and see some of Europe before you go home, you'll also get to meet lots of new, fun people and feel better in result.
You can also go more to the east (like to Poland, I live in Poland), there it's even cheaper.
