Why isn't that person talking to anyone?

When I did that it was because of severe depression and drug abuse.

> It's very hard and there are a lot of things I could say that would maybe clarify things
What things?

>I have failed to sufficiently deliver over the last month because I always last a little bit of time and then I cave and say something small or reply to a tweet or SOMETHING and even if I have good things to say
Are you a stalker?

> I even have things at their house which I would kind of like to get back (however they live an hour and a half away) and I want to give them space because a series of past events have led them to feel this dislocated sort of way and they have emphasized it's not my fault but have asked to please give them space and stop worrying about them yet here I am.
Now it's "them"?

Can't give advice without more information on what is going on.

>>17303284
They have no insurance at the moment.
They have bad depression and BPD and a series of mentally / physically / sexually abusive exes that have kind of left them feeling drained and basically they need to recharge. I would like to point out that they were dating me and we seperation because they couldn't handle a relationship. We talked for a while and then went completely non verbal per their decision because the idea of someone having a romantic attachment to them is far too much for them to handle right now. They attempted suicide once before I knew them and they still are unsure if they're glad they woke up after all of this pills and alcohol they consumed.

This has left me in a very fragile state. They said recently they will never be able to date me again. I can come to terms with this out of respect but before they had their breakdown we were incredibly happy and in love. Because of their exes they have trust issues and we started dating as I was coming to terms with my ex of 2 years being mentally/emotionally abusive but it was light and they were still nice and kind and in love with me. However, they had tried breaking up with me a few times in the past and I would fight to get them back and after that happened 3 times when it was finally my turn, I had a hard time breaking up with them because I knew it'd be better in the long run. I liked them a lot but it had to happen, but the person I'm talking about said it was okay if I took a week or so to break up with my previous ex because I wanted to be gentle about it and I even mentioned I had another crush but they still clung on (keep in mind they had threatened a break up on me a few times with less remorse before this and are also now just as happier as they've ever been when they were with me with a new partner) back to my most recent ex that I posted this thread about, they told me all the while that exactly what we were doing (liking eachother and kissing) happened to them when they had a guy say they liked them and made out with them for 2 weeks but he didn't even try to break up with his gf while that happened and then they told his gf because it was fucked up and then they got pissed and never talked again.

So basically they're saying they cant ever date me because they feel awful doing the same thing to my ex that had once hurt them. However this was buried in the past I thought and the guilt has come back a month into their slump of depression/isolation and they said they've thought about it over and over and have made up their mind. A part of me still knows I love this person more than I ever loved my ex and that I loved them more after 2 weeks than I ever did in my previous 2 year relationship (of which people literally complimented me and my ex about for being so "perfect" because it definitely was a solid relationship) and I know I would never cheat / fall in love with someone else and not tell them, but they still have trust issues because they've been in the opposite position and again have a history of abusive exes who all wound up not truly loving them. I still feel like once we become friends again and they start to feel better, there can be hope for a future but god I don't know how long this is gonna take and it sucks a lot and it's triggered my dormant depression and on top of this I've been having an existential crisis about not being able to have the funds to move out of my awful town to a bigger more exciting city with less shitty people for another year, I hate my job, I'm in debt, and my friends are lame. So it's hard to think straight and I need some direction as to help me do the only thing I can, which is patiently wait and not confront my ex.

My whole situation is really hard to explain and very niche and it's super hard to be vague to get the advice to what I should do to describe my current state to people but if I explain in detail it gets confusing/hard to follow/ too long to read

>>17303454
They/them == multiple people.
I think you mean "her" (singular)

It sounds like she's a nutcase. You can respect her desire to want to not have contact, but I think it is very reasonable to want your stuff back.

I understand wanting to keep her contact info, but write it down on a paper and put it in a drawer. Then delete her from your phone and twitter and whatever else so you don't feel tempted to contact her.

When she feels better you can get back in touch, but, honestly man, BPD is fucked up and you are probably better off moving on. She's probably in the stage where she 'hates you'. They kinda do this thing where it's like "I hate you/ but wait/ don't leave me!" It's a mindfuck of a ride being with someone with BPD.