I have a wonderful girlfriend, but I can't get excited about

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Anonymous
2016-06-25 17:08:18 Post No. 17292064
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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:08:18 Post No. 17292064 [Report]

I have a wonderful girlfriend, but I can't get excited about the relationship. She's crazy about me, but even after a year and a half I'm not sure if I'm satisfied.
Our sex life is good, we have a lot in common, we communicate well, and we've stuck together through some tough times, but I'm always unsure of whether I want to stay with her.
I've struggled a lot with depression and anxiety, and I think that may be the heart of the issue. I also tend to feel repulsed when I feel someone is attached to me, and by that same token I'm attracted to people who are distant and witholding (which is how my girlfriend was when we first met). This is the result of some childhood bullshit I'm working towards resolving, and I know it will cause problems in all my relationships until I fix it.
Recently I made a new friend who I have kind of a crush on. I don't think a relationship between us would work, so there's no point going after her, but it's a painful reminder that I don't feel much passion or excitement in my current situation.
I've told her all of this except the bit about my crush, and she says she wants to work on it together and help me get therapy (which I'll admit I do need).
The relationship is so great for a lot of reasons, and I feel like it's not her that's the issue, but I still can't help but wonder if our love is a lost cause at this point. What should I do?

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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:27:45 Post No.17292127
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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:27:45 Post No.17292127 [Report]

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>>17292064
bump

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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:35:46 Post No.17292150
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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:35:46 Post No.17292150 [Report]

>>17292064

Honestly, I went through something similar (minus the depression and anxiety). I stuck with her and I only ended up hurting her more, but that was because what was causing the disinterest for me was something completely different than what is going on with you. I think that if you really feel like things will be different when you get help and you honestly feel like she will help you through it, you should stay with her. Someone who is willing to go through so much just to help you and be able to continue dating you, is someone who you should really value and hold on to. Someday, with the right kind of help, you will probably be able to really get excited over what it is that you have in front of you and the relationship will work.

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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:39:51 Post No.17292158
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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:39:51 Post No.17292158 [Report]

Sounds like you might have the mentality that the grass is greener on the other side. The only way to truly find out is to go and taste it.

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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:42:58 Post No.17292165
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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:42:58 Post No.17292165 [Report]

>>17292150
What worries me is the possibility that things won't get better, and that part of it actually is her. I don't know what would be causing my disinterest if she were part of the problem, though. The only thing about her I take issue with is that she isn't as smart as me, though that could easily get better since she's going back to school next semester.
Would you mind telling me what your issue was with your girlfriend? How did you figure it out?

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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:44:38 Post No.17292170
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Anonymous 2016-06-25 17:44:38 Post No.17292170 [Report]

>>17292158
I actually did. We broke up for a few weeks not too long ago, specifically to see other people. We ended up getting back together, obviously, although the other girl I'm into isn't the type of person you meet every day.