I am 22 and a recent college grad. I am jealous of people who can afford to live alone and support themslves. That's it.

>>17270055
>college
see that's you went wrong

>>17270051
What you lack isn't status, but something else.

Tell us your real problem, and we'll advise you. Status is totally unimportant for friendship, love, happiness, and the things in life that are good. Point being that the object of your pursuit is misplaced, and if you tell us your real problem we'll help

>>17270064
My real "problem" is being manipulated. I want power and I want security. I want to be on the top so I don't have to worry about people fucking with me.

I'm not jealous of anyone, because I admire success instead of loathing them for it.

I feel like many people in my life are mediocre, and I don't say that insultingly. We all want interesting/high quality people in our lives, and to become one of those ourselves. Yet they're overwhelmingly rare, even though I don't think it'd be that hard if people tried.

Personally, I look for the following:
- People who remain calm through adversity. You'd love to have such a person around during a crisis, and not because you're hiring them to solve your issue for you. Certain people make you feel better just being in their presence
- People who are non-needy, they are content with or without your approval. They just respond accordingly, it's not a big deal
- People who do a little extra, e.g. if they're beside someone and both aren't doing anything, they'll make conversation, not just random small talk, they actually try to have it be worthwhile for both of them, etc. To make the mundane interesting.

>>17270097
When I saw the thread's title I was expecting some puny shit where you wanted to be the center of attention, but after reading this, I am genuinely happy that you want to be that person, it takes a lot of work to be like that, and it's all in the shape of the mind rather than the brute force of the dude, etc. These people are either self-taught to be like that, because of reasons, sometimes a harsh life make people stronger, etc. The point is : You're going to need a lot of effort to get there.
You must think about your situation, re-think your values, re-think your opinion of people, etc.
I advise to read a lot, what you are looking for are people "who live better", and what better books than classics and philosophy to help you with that. Self-development books are odd and I'd not bother with them.

The point of these books isn't in the story, it's the mirror you will see in it, they give you about your own life. They show you what values they hold and why they will not flee through adversity. The ultimate objective would be for you to grow that same state of mind that doesn't fear others, that is admired by people, etc.

Begin with the Apology of Socrates for instance, it's a really small book about the end of life and how he was wrongly convicted, read about his life and understand the meaning of it and transpose that " reflection" to yourself.

>>17270127
That's not OP

>>17270147
Reply still applies for you then. OP will have another answer, mine isn't suited for him

I tend to shy away from books that are mostly theory/narration, unless they contain suggested action steps or a clear path to fulfilment. The mind tends to overcomplicate things. But once you take action and review the outcome, everything is clear, and tends to be simple. Do literary scholars and wise men think up to a certain point and go "nice, I'm pretty close to where I want to be"? My experience tends to be that they're regarded as eccentric and find it harder to relate to those that don't share their pursuits.

It seems to me more a detour than anything else. If you wanted to be comfortable and relaxed around people, would you read the thoughts of people who ponder the intricacies of the universe? I'd rather strike up a conversation with someone and practice the state of being comfortable and relaxed around people.

But I will take your suggestion.

>>17270094
>I want to be on the top so I don't have to worry about people fucking with me.
there are more ways to avoid being fucked with besides clambering your way to the top. for any given heap that you're on top of, there will always be a much taller heap.

>I want power and I want security.
you're looking for the social equivalent of a baseball bat. you should be looking for the social equivalent of judo. it seems like more work but it will get you more respect from the kind of people who can actually do things for you.

why do you want the respect of people who are barely adults? are you a college professor or something?

>>17270210

> I tend to shy away from books that are mostly theory/narration

That's why I told you to avoid self-development books, of applied psychology. Don't read how one author is telling you to live your life, read about how other lived their life and what value did they hold until the end. That is not an "imperative", in the way that it's not giving you a path to follow, it's giving you a person, a spirit, etc. You choose to be like that, or you don't. In either way, you will use other experiences to shape your own, at the end of the book you must reflect and tell yourself : What did this book give me that I didn't have ?

French literature is good for this, as well as Greek tragedy, pure philosophy might as well do the trick. (Read the Apology of Socrates first, I feel this would be the best for you because it shows how one is dealing with the troubles of life with swearing to keep his own sanity, a little bit romanesque but it's supposedly a real story of Platon's Master)
Other you might appreciate by order of difficulty

> Oedipus / Antigone by Sophocles
> Montaigne
> Sartes
> Kant

You could even look for youtube videos or book of practical use of these philosophy, as long as it makes your "person" grow.
Good luck, first book is easy, the following will be hard.

>>17270254
butting in to say, marcus aurelius wrote some good shit too. and I got a lot of personal development by reading biographies of people I thought were cool.

>>17270264
Nice to see someone like that, I mostly expect people to be

> wut I am asking 'bout my life you tell me to read some old shit ? GTFO go make a ted talk
Or something along these lines, lol.

As unpleasant as I might find self-development books, I've found myself breaking down and re-questioning my own existence when reading some books, that's why I push everyone to do that. I was 16 when I knew about Descartes, and about the cogito ergo sum. Changed my whole perception of life, I will not speak about my personal life, but believe me it destroyed everything I believed to be true, and made a new person out of the old me.

Marc-Aurelius is good, stoicism is good, Epictetus wrote about it too, I didn't read it but I know that it should be the same point of view.
Two days ago I met an old man, we spoke for two hours in the morning and didn't see the time passing, he advised me to read The Kindly Ones, I will probably do it, it's about how you can let the "evil" enter your life without knowing (in the context of WWII )