Well /adv/ I've put myself in a bit of a pickle.
I came home from work today and my gf thought she would play a little prank on me.
>open my front door
>immediately confronted by someone in a ski mask pointing my shotgun at me
>have time to process "gun"
>grab barrel immediately swing it to the side and clock what I thought was a guy in the face, putting a nice hole in my drywall
>guy starts screaming and crying
>wait a second I know that voice
>gf was under the mask, gun wasn't loaded, she thought it would be funny to give me a scare
>blow up on her for about a minute (I'm a former Marine so fucking around with weapons is a no go)
>shes a blubbering mess after I'm through too much happening too fast I guess
>grab my smokes and go for a walk, as I was so pissed off I couldn't see straight
>sitting on a park bench enjoying the summer now
What do I do gents? I didn't mean to hurt her, I just reacted. Plus what the fuck kind of prank is it to stick a man up in his own home?
>>17265444
lmao, your girl is an idiot.
I wouldn't say she deserved it but damn, she should've thought that one through a little bit more.
Just go back and apologize to her for hitting her. It's better to just keep the peace. Explain to her that her prank was a little out of line and that you really didn't mean to hurt her.
Maybe you'll look back and laugh on it later on. To an outsider, that's actually pretty funny.
>>17265444
My advice is to punch her again. Only this time, when she goes down, kick her in the face.
What a terrible "prank".
>>17265444
She had it coming. Even the threat of a weapon is considered offensive. That shit ain't funny.
Make sure she remembers that guns are not toys. Had it been someone else, she would be dead.
>>17265457
this. not that difficult just agree to move on
Your girl put you in a pickle not you. You're a marine what did she expect you to do when confronted with a threat, scream and run off? And yeah, staged robbery/home invasion is a shit "prank". Pranks make people uncomfortable not potentially fear for their life. Obviously you're gonna have to apologize even though I don't think it's your fault, she's probably going to try and put the blame on you too but don't let her. I wouldn't beat yourself up about it OP it's not domestic violence, it's not as if you punched her because she wouldn't make you a sandwich.
>>17265457
This. Very poorly thought out prank on your GF's part, but she didn't mean any harm. After what happened, you can be sure she will never do it again. Go back and be sweet to her... she's probably hurting from the hook her face lmaoo poor thing..
>>17265457
That's what I was thinking honestly. I just needed to get out and clear my head cause I was on go-mode
>pointing a gun at someone who you don't intend to kill
>ever
What the fuck is wrong with your girlfriend? You really need to sit her down and teach her basic gun safety. She's a danger to herself and others acting like that and she's lucky all she got was a punch in the face. She has absolutely NO right to be upset.
>>17265457
This. Sorry you had to deal with it. I feel sorry for your girlfriend for blowing a joke so colossally (I can't help but think she's not too smart, sorry) and for getting punched. I hope you have not injured her severely.
Go back, apologize, put a steak on her face (or whatever--the next few weeks are going to be difficult for you both if you've blackened your ladyfriend's eye), explain your behavior. She made an unfathomably stupid choice of jokes, but she didn't hurt you. Your response was totally reasonable in context but massive overkill in practice, and she still had a worse experience than you did.
>>17265505
The thing is I taught her all of this, hell we go shooting once a month! I taught her weapons conditions and Treat Never Keep Keep but she goes and pulls something like this??? I don't get it
>>17265444
Well, you've got some good personal advice here. But let's get practical.
You should get back home right away and talk to her, and get a friend or neighbour to come over so she can explain to them what happened. You'll need that if for any reasons someone calls the police and you get charged with domestic assault.
Not your fault OP, it was a stupid idea for her to do that
>>17265689
Domestic assult my ass and trip faggotry aside, your actions were clearly self desense. That being said, doesn't hurt to have her repeat her stupid as fuck joke and reasonings in front of someone else
>>17265711
Hey, trips mean I speak truth.
Seriously OP. This is a bad situation, you don't need any criminal charges out of this. You don't want to freak out on her so she gets pissed off and then calls the police to say you hit her. Then you're screwed.
Worry about the personal stuff later. For now, protect yourself.
Holy shit a thread with actual good advice in it on /adv/?
You should listen to what has been said here OP
>>17265444
That'd get your ass fucking shot where I'm from.
You never point a fun at anybody, loaded or not---you, as a former Marine, are a disgrace to the Corps for not teaching your whore proper firearm rules.
What would your fucking CO say?
>>17265718
Trips mean fuck all ..screenshots your law degree and timestamp it if you wanna put some meat n bones to your statement.
Having her admit her actions in front of someone else is solid advice, I won't deny that. Very CYA. If this ever went to court, I seriously doubt it'd gain any traction whatsoever.
>>17265738
Sorry, there's no chance I'm gonna put my ID up here. You don't have to believe I'm a lawyer, but I am.
My advice to OP is rock solid. I've seen this before. You need someone else to hear her story right away, so that if she changes it later, or some busybody calls the police because she has a black eye, you have some defense.
If she is pressured by the police into saying you hit her, and they either ignore the rest of it or she isn't clear because they are crusaders, her statement to the third party made previously will help you.
Lastly, if you left right after hitting her, she might need medical attention. Or she's calling her mother or sister crying about what happened, and they've already called the police. Get back home and cover your ass.
>I know
>I'll surprise my marine boyfriend with a gun!
>no way that'll bite me back
Training kicked in. You could've killed her.
Also, similar story, although nowhere near your level
>be me
>with gf
>on escalator
>guy behind us standing on the left side of the stairs (that side is used for walkers)
>shouting on the phone, someone pushes past him
>starts swearing like crazy
>turn around
>he's about 6 steps under me
>"If you weren't an idiot, you wouldn't be pushed around"
>guy starts shouting he's going to kick my ass
>darksoulshandswide.gif
>"Well give it a shot, buddy!"
>suddenly
>gf turns me around
>bear hug initiated
>"let it go, honey"
>my mother used to hold me like that to calm me down
>it never worked
>flashback to feeling of helplessness and my thrashing about as a kid
>threat behind me
>can't see
>clench teeth
>"Let..fucking let go of me!"
>she let me go, got all pissy
>explain about childhood
>she's having none of it
>just say fuck it, let her rage a bit and go on with life
I was a second from hitting my GF in the ribs. She never hugged me like that again. Now, she only hugs me underarm, and even then she seems very careful. Might be useful to explain that it was a reflex.
Bonus point: That evening, my mother told me she read that in a book from the time I was a kid. She recently found a review that stated the techniques (bear-hug being mentioned BY NAME) can actually do more psychological harm to a kid than good.
Damn, the feels.
I dunno if it's too early for you two to be laughing about it but this is the kind of shit you tell at your 10th anniversary dinner or something lol
>>17265757
You're the reason why no one wants to hire vets
>>17265775
Staying with someone that stupid for so long probably WILL end up getting the OP killed
Tell her you're a trained weapon and guns aren't your then flick the side of her head.
>>17265757
So the point of the story is that bear hugs hurt kids? Nig she was just trying to help you lol Jesus Christ
>>17265718
Trips of Truth are the digits in your post number, not your name. You're not even a tripfag, you're a namefag.
>>17265780
Well hopefully she learned her lesson lol. My friends and I have done stupider shit up until our mid twenties, playful fun and ignorance is always one slip away from disaster and disaster is the quickest and harshest teacher.
>>17265755
>what is censoring
Just block out any identification desu
>>17265779
I'm not even a vet, m80.
>>17265793
No, the point of the story is someone is going to do dumb shit to you that might get them hurt. One of my friends socked his GF in the jaw just because she went "Boo" behind him. That shit just happens.
>>17265801
True nuff
>>17265803
Then you wouldn't know if it's mine or not.
I'm the LawFag. I start legal advice threads here sometimes. I'll do one now.
>>17265875
You'd have a timestamp next to it. Even if you showed the name on it, we couldn't verify whether it was actually yours. It just shows that somebody with a law degree is close to you at least.
She deserved it, as she was acting a fucking fool.
She needs to learn the 4 rules of firearms;
1. The gun is always loaded.
2. Never point the gun at anything you are not willing to destroy.
3. Keep your finger off the trigger until you have made the decision to shoot.
4. Be sure of your target, and aware of what lies beyond it.
(I'm a female, btw. Just sayin.)
>>17265920
>mfw when thinking about you hurting
>>17265932
wut.
>>17265944
Not him but it's a /fit/ meme
>>17265944
Lurk moar Summerfag
>>17265920
>tfw no qt /k/ gf to teach you how to shoot trap
>>17265959
Not a Summerfag, just one of those people who spends less than 10% of their life away from screens. Crazy shit, eh?
>>17265971
>tfw no qt trap bfgf
>>17265444
storm back into your home and fuck the shit out of your gf OP, it will be the best sex you've ever had
>>17265989
>less than 10%
>fucking up that hard
Wanna know how I know you're a woman?
>>17265444
>I'm a former Marine so fucking around with weapons is a no go
Should have been carrying. A dozen 9mm rounds in a person changes their idea of fun.
>>17266025
I think the punch was a better option. Faster, safer, cleaner (legally and, you know, physically)
>>17266031
Putting her 6 feet under would have been legal in your case.
>>17265444
she's obviously not very smart and just wanted to have what she thought was some fun with you. don't act mad at her, but don't apologize for punching her either
>>17265444
>Is this the equivalent to those fake redit shits like "dude left heart warm note on my car after keying it".
No I will not subscribe to your youtube channel.
No I will not go fund your girlfriend a new face.
>>17265757
now I want a qt girl to bear hug me and tell me that everything will be alright
>>17266077
Well, have her turn you away from a possible attacker and then we'll talk. I was cornered at that moment.
>>17266043
I'm not OP
>>17265989
Maths is so hard :(
>>17265989
>just one of those people who spends less than 10% of their life away from screens.
So you spend 90% of your life in front of a screen?
You big fucking downie, read over your posts before posting summerfag.
>>17265959
This is not just a /fit/ thing. Bread arguments get pretty heated on all boards especially when an American mentions he puts his in the fridge.
>>17266221
Wtf I'm American and I've never heard of that. I know people put eggs in the fridge and get weirded out that I don't.
>>17265444
There are two possibilities here:
1. Your girlfriend is a fucking idiot.
2. Your girlfriend is a fucking genius, and she's about to "Gone Girl" the shit out of you. She's just collected evidence of your "physically abusive relationship"
>>17266250
I have heard it quite a bit actually and seen pictures. It might be a meme to triggers Europeans who beleive bread should be bought fresh and eaten that day or the next and should be stored in a bread box.
It is common as fuck on /int/ and some other boards so I find it hard to believe it is bait.
I don't understand the egg in fridge thing either but then again I have chickens so eggs are never in shortage.
I have never eaten a store bought egg.
Say you'll forgive her if she eats your ass.
99% chance shell do it.
You're girlfriend sounds like one of those sheeps that watch those "Prank" videos where it's just some asshole Arab/Mexican/Italian guy being a douchebag to urban blacks and scream "its just a prank bro" when they're about to be flatten.
Ban her from watching those videos cause they are cancer to our society.
As someone who works in a haunted house, I call bullshit. The human response to being surprised is to throw your hands up over your face and/or twitch. Zero people throw a punch, despite claiming they will if frightened.
>>17266740
1. Nobody actually feels THREATENED in a haunted house, just startled. There's a difference. Nobody throws a punch in a haunted house because they all know you're a fucking actor.
2. Your response to a threat will change if you're trained and experienced with violence, and OP was a Marine
>>17266742
1. No one remembers you're an actor when startled.
2. My best friend's a Marine and he's an idiot. 4 months isn't going to retrain your instinctive reactions to that degree. For some reason, there's a large amount of wannabe tough guys who can't help but say "don't scare me bro, I'll throw a punch".
>>17266754
>No one remembers you're an actor when startled.
Yes they fucking do. Are you for real?
>>17266759
If you know it's an actor, why would you jump? For a brief second, you forget. You can't override your natural reaction, anon, even if you know it's fake. Same way a horror movie works.
>>17265444
>What do I do gents? I didn't mean to hurt her, I just reacted.
She disguised herself and POINTED A FUCKING SHOTGUN AT YOU. It's good that you feel bad about hitting her, and believe me, I get accused of being a white knight all the time for my stance on hitting women. But you know what? You get a free pass, man. I ran this post by some of the most feminist women I know, and they agree with me on this.
Call her and make sure she understands what's going on and isn't calling the police or anything.
And then call a gun range and ask about safety classes. Your girlfriend seriously needs one. Like, yesterday.
>Plus what the fuck kind of prank is it to stick a man up in his own home?
A bad one. Also illegal in most jurisdictions.
>>17266770
So OP is a liar because nobody's ever punched you in the face at work?
Where's your haunted house at, mate?
>>17266770
Right, but for the same reason we don't punch the TV, we don't punch the actor at a haunted house. We get startled, but we know it can't really hurt us. If you tried that in a hallway, someone would eventually beat the fuck out of you.
>>17266770
Except that people go to haunted houses on purpose, because they WANT to be scared. So they might literally have a split-second moment of real fear, which is IMMEDIATELY replaced by the "oh right, it's fake, haha!" feeling.
In OP's case, he did not willingly sign on to be frightened, and he did not know it was fake. He thought he had a real gun pointed at him, and he defended himself
Are you really so dense that you can't see the difference?
>>17266871
>He thought he had a real gun pointed at him
He did, in fact, have a real gun pointed at him. It happened to not be loaded, but he had no way of knowing that: guns are opaque.
Besides, those gun safety classes I was talking about? Rule Zero of gun safety is that the gun is loaded. Full stop. Even if it's not loaded, it is loaded. The only time it can possibly not be nloaded is when you've field-stripped it and it's in pieces on the desk in front of you, and even then you can't QUITE be sure, so it's still better to treat it as loaded.
>>17266770
Get a load of this faggot.
>>17266221
>>17266250
>>17266262
The "bread in fridge or not" is huge in Ireland. Personally I don't because too much/loss of moisture fucks bread, and I'm not willing to seal the bread enough to prevent it. I also read somethingabout crystallisation of starch being a cause for staleness and occurring earlier at lower temperatures (could be bs desu). Overall, I don't really care because the bread isn't in the house for longer than 5 days.
>>17267251
That is to say, loss of moisture fucks bread, too much moisture also fucks bread.
>>17267251
Where I am living we leave it out in winter, but summer temperatures (even in a breadbox) cause mould to grow insanely fast. We can start to see mould in 2-3 days, easily, even in a well sealed bag etc.
So the practical option is to throw it in the fridge during heatwaves. Lesser of two evils.
>>17266740
>>17266754
>>17266770
Except OP didn't know it was his girlfriend and CONSCIOUSLY thought it was a masked man with a gun, so he CONSCIOUSLY decided to punch them, retard.
>>17267251
I have never seen or heard of anyone put bred in the fridge in Ireland.
Maybe in the freezer but not the fridge.
>>17265444
Yeah, she can't be mad at you for that. You did a reflexive action, you didn't punch "her" in the face you punched a robber.
>>17265444
YOU JUST GOT PRANKED!!!!111
Let me get this straight....
Your girlfriend plays a prank on you, and you go and punch her? To make matters worse, you scream at her like a retard, then run away to hide in the park?
Go back and help her. Then apologize like a hundred times.
>>17268605
>tripfags in charge of being able to read
>>17265535
break up with this two bit bimbo
>>17268605
Pointing a gun at somebody as a prank is so massively, insanely stupid, so shortsighted and dangerous, that whatever happens next is entirely the prankster's fault. She should consider herself very lucky and be very grateful that nobody ended up getting seriously injured or thrown in jail as a result of her prank.
Also, piss off, tripfag.
>>17266740
Actually I've been in two haunted houses now and both times when I was scared I stared swinging
Luckily I was a little girl, so I didn't hurt anyone.
I assumed it was something I would grow out of, but one time at a concert the main singer went on stage by coming through the crowd. He didn't reveal himself until he was close to the stage, right next to me in fact.
I was so excited and scared I hit him. Luckily again I'm just a skinny little women now, and he was huge, so no harm done, but I learned my lesson.
No more haunted houses for me, I'm a liability.
