i dont know if this is the right board for this but i need help right now.
im on the shitter and i am severely constipated. im in alot of pain right now. i can bearly stand up straight and i simply cant get this shit out of me.
i cant find any information on the internet about what to do in the short term. its also 4:am and i live in the middle of nowhere and as far as i know i dont have any laxatives in my house. i just drank as much water as i could. i sware the pain is getting worse by the minute.
4chan is the only place i can think of where i can find people who know about stuff quickly.
HELP ME
got anything with plum in it? that works wonders. also going for a jog might help
>>17262895
http://www.youthhealthmag.com/articles/1875/20141106/homemade-laxative-remedies-so-you-dont-have-to-run-to-the-store.htm
>>17262903
youre a hero man
>>17262934
>butthurt
Oh my gawd
>>17262895
I frequently get constipated so I can help you.
One, drink a shit ton of water.
Water always helps.
Two, shit or get off the pot.
Don't sit on the shitter for hours.
If you don't feel like shitting within 5 minutes, leave.
Otherwise you strain your arsehole.
Three, don't be afraid of laxatives or stool looseners. Once I shat a shit so big that it broke my asshole. Bigger than my fist. Not even joking. Don't fuck with constipation.
Four, eat the fuck more fiber. It makes a hell of a difference.
Good luck to you.
Also, I get shit faced a few times a weak. That always makes my bowels liquid. Booze is my preferred laxative.
>>17262972
do you know if anything bad will happen if i go to sleep like this? it hurts alot less when i lie down. its now 5:20 and im tired af. if i go to sleep and go to the doc tomorrow will this be worse or anything in the morning?
>>17263001
If it doesn't happen, it won't happen.
Let it go until you feel it coming.
The best you can do is prime the situation for it.
>>17263004
thanks guys
you were more helpfull than i was expecting
Worst case have an enema done and consider it as a warning to have a more balanced diet.
I had to stay in the hospital for this once, they thought it was my appendix, but turns out I was just full of shit.
