/adv/,
I need help, i'll try to keep this short
I keep forgetting about dates i made to hang out with my girlfirned
Be together 6 months, i love her a lot
But a few times i have legit forgotten that i was supposed to hang with here her that day.
For example: yesterday we were hanging out, we had a great day. i CASUALLY mentioned that she should sleep over tomorrow (tonight). she calls me an hour ago" where are u, i thought we were hanging out, wtf"
Do i not love her as much as i think i do? I know i have a shitty short term memory. i always say that she should have texted me earlier to confirm, and that is normal and lots of people do that, and also that is especially true when the date is casually mentioned, and not really discussed. and that if she knows i have memory probs, this would be helpful. this has happened around 5 times i would estimate.
please adv i need help.
its not that i dont want to hang out with her. sometimes i feel like she tricks me into saying the wrong things when she calls me.
please adv i need help. I told her i was coming over to see her and apologize. shes really mad right now and doesnt believe i can change my ways.
i dont want to lose her, but for some reason im thinking about not going, and just letting the relationship end.
whats wrong with me /adv/?
>>17262397
What were you doing when she called?
Whatever that was is what you love more than her.
>>17262405
i was taking a nap. her phonecall woke me up.
she says i only consider myself, which could be partially true given my cicumstances, which she acknowledges.
i am taking care of sick mother and dog and full time college student.
>>17262397
nah if u feel bad afterwards u love her, ur just stressed or tired to remeber.
:/ bump
i dont know, maybe i like the idea of having a girlfriend more than i like her?
i dont think thats the case, just playing devils advocate. i really like her a lot, im just tired of hurting her, it makes me feel terrible knowing that shes hurting.
should i go fix it? or just end the pain
>>17262437
yeah. i do love her.
>>17262420
Kek
i have a shitty short term memory due to brain damage. accidentally scheduled to have two girls over at my place on the same night. big oops.
i just use google calendar now. you can sync to your phone and have it remind you twice, oncei n the morning and once an hour or two ebfore hand
>>17262397
To me it sounds like you're just in a stressful, busy period in your life rn and your memory is suffering bc of it, which is completely normal. I do it, and so do plenty of other people.
First of all, if you haven't made it completely clear already, explain how stressed you are and your shitty short term memory and emphasize how it is not a reflection on how you feel about her. Really consider how shitty it must make her feel when you forget about dates, whether or not you've asked her to remind you before. It still stings, even if she is aware of the problem
Second, you need to set up a system. Now that you've explained everything, she should be more understanding of why you need to be reminded beforehand. But YOU also need to put in more effort, or else she is going to feel like you don't care. You know you have a problem, so even if something is casually brought up, confirm it right then, don't leave things in the air. Then immediately pull out your phone and put it in your calendar and set up a reminder or 3. Tell her what you're doing too, so she knows you're being proactive and can help too.
And if this sounds like too much work to you, then just end it. It just means you're really not that invested in the relationship or it could be that you just have too much going on rn and don't have time for it.
