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Insecurity and ex gf
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So me and my ex of 3 years parted ways a year ago, which was for the best for the both of us. We were incompatible in terms of where we were in our lives, maturity, sexually and maybe even personality wise. Both felt like shit at the end of the relationship and the decision to split up was mutual. I broke off any contact after we split up and though I glanced at her tumblr a couple of times during the first 6 months, we didn't speak.

We had a conversation over facebook 6 months ago when we had seen each other in the city and now when I got back from the city my college is in, I found her on Tinder. I had thought about her somewhat frequently during the last 6 months and had this urge to talk to her so I super liked her and we started talking on facebook again.

However, I come from a history of insecurity and I feel that I'm not gravitating towards her personality in order to get back together out of love, I just want her to like me. I get this sharp pain of anxiety in my stomach when it takes her a day to reply which I know has nothing to do with me wanting her badly - sometimes I even feel empty when I get her response. She had physical issues that lowered her sex drive to a 0 which caused a lot of the problems causing us to split up, and I felt rejected sexually by her. I realize that I yearn for her because I've put my own sense of self worth in her hands (perhaps due to the time when I was rejected sexually by her), but I don't know how to let go of the feeling of wanting to interact with her.

She is also the most attractive girl I've ever been with and perhaps even seen in some aspects, so this surely has something to do with why I feel like I do too.

TLDR - I miss my ex of 1 year due to insecurity and I want her to want me more than I actually want her back
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It's a bad idea. You haven't given yourself enough time to think straight.

You two broke up for a reason. Your brain is still wired for dependency on her, which is why you're feeling what you're feeling, and is also why you hear about people in toxic relationships breaking up and getting back together over and over.

You need to move on and give yourself time to forget that dependency.
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>>17260542
Right. Do you have any advice on letting self worth depend on the approval of others? My low self esteem is an issue when it comes to relationships with women. Not as a reoccuring theme from relationship to relationship but as a theme of how I feel when interacting with attractive women
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>>17260560
Find worth in other things.
Hobbies, platonic friends, working towards a goal for yourself.
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>>17260584
Thanks for your input mate. Have a great day, you've made mine better
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>>17260708
Glad to hear it. Don't give up.
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Yea man like these guys are saying, just keep yourself busy and work on yourself. Something better will come a long. And with your newly acquired skills, talents, self respect, and happines with YOURSELF, everything will be a lot easier. Keep on trucking anon. Move forward.
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