Is it possible to lose your virginity if you're older than 25?
If so, how would I go about it?
>inb4escort/hooker
That's my last resort
>>17252870
This thread is relevant to my interests seeing as I'm 28 and still a virgin. Considering driving to Nevada and hiring a whore or trying to convince a stripper to sleep with me. Normal girls are simply out of my league.
>>17252870
It's possible to lose your virginity at almost any age without the use of hired help.
>>17252881
>how would I go about it?
I forgot to add. Put yourself out there.
>>17252885
Can you be more detailed.
I wouldn't even know where to start.
>>17252943
Dating sites, bookstores, coffee shops off the top of my head. Dating sites are less pressure in some ways because you can do it at home and try for results. The other 2 options require you to be a bit more outgoing/charismatic.
The past doesn't matter. You can make up an entirely new past if you want.
From now on you were a chad since you were 16. Here. Tell it to all girls you date and they will all believe it.
>>17252870
What's the reason you can't get a girl in the first place?
>>17252870
Bumping for interest. Fell for the "only have sex with someone you truly love" lie and now im 21 and starting to get pissed.
>>17252870
Fucking idiot. You stick your penis into a vagina or anus. Preferably the anus of a member of the opposite sex but I suppose either would technically result is loss of virginity. How hard is it to do that? I'm married and not even that good looking and not even is decent shape and i still run across the occasional opportunity. Man up and own that shit.
>>17253027
Could be looks. Could be lack of experience
Could be a nitpicky, yet promiscuous society.
Could be because I don't go out much.
When I do try, I get rejected...a lot.
>>17252957
Worth mentioning though is that dating sites are incredibly rigged against guys who are not tall, rich, white and/or good looking. This is especially compounded by the fact that the guy to girl ratio is severely imbalanced, and women on average receive far more messages and attention than even most above average men.
Dating sites are worth a try, but be in it for the long haul if you want to find someone. Though, I suppose that applies to dating overall.
>>17252870
I think its possible
Don't go telling them you're still a virgin. Most girls will assume you've had at least one partner by that age. I'm also guessing they don't want to deal with someone who might become too clingy.
>>17253103
Yea. I lie about being a virgin.
I already planned out my lie too.
Is an escort recommended?
>>17252957
>bookstores and coffee shops
How would I even approach them?
>>17253398
This.
I can't imagine they would want to be approached like that. I'd feel like I'd just be annoying them. Like, if I go to a bookstore, or any store foe that matter, it's because I'm shopping.
Lose it to someone you actually care about instead of going after some cunt.
>>17253431
How do I find someone I care about?
How do I find someone that cares about me? ;_;
>>17252870
have you tried using dating sides or hookup apps like a normal person?
>>17253409
>I have zero luck with women, but I KNOW what they're thinking and what they want
Stop.
Just go up and talk to them like a normal person.
Don't apologize for disturbing them or anything stupid like that.
Just talk about anything.
>>17253445
Look. You're right in that I don't know what people are thinking, but I can't pretend to understand why anyone would want or be ok someone coming up to them while they're shopping.
>>17253445
>>17253467
Also, you also have to think about how some people will think you're creepy and could potentially get you in trouble with the law.
>>17253482
Yea. I'm 27. I don't see how hitting on someone in a bookstore wouldn't be seen as creepy.
>>17253482
If they don't seem interested, just say "well, have a good day" and leave. They're not going to blow the rape whistle because you tried talking to them.
>>17252870
My father was 55 years old when he married for the first time, my mother was 30. As my father always tells me 'there is no age limit for men'
>>17253482
>could potentially get you in trouble with the law.
No, it won't. Now you're pretending to be stupid on purpose.
>>17253535
I bet he wasn't a virgin before meeting your mom though.
>>17253482
>>17253517
Yeah, that's the risk you take. I don't have enough reference to say just how many women get pissed at you. If you're too nervous, it might help to focus on being "less creepy". Put in quotes because creepy is a dumb ass, over used word, but yeah. Dress a little better, sharpen your hygiene, work on body language, but at the end of the day you have to just go for it. I will say though that a working strategy for me has been to go for women who showed some 'interest'. Usually this means eye contact - if you catch her looking at you more than once, give it a shot. Hell, I'd even joke about it too, like "I see you keep looking at me, and then back at that bookshelf over there, is there some book you think I should read?"
Really it helps to stop giving a fuck what others think. Really. You're always gonna get shit even if you're doing nothing wrong, and you can't let that shame you into submission and inaction. Not only that but women generally cannot sympathize with feeling pressured to approach the opposite sex because so many of them never really do it, even if they say they do. Most womens' idea of an 'approach' is talking to a guy they like for 5 minutes but never once being bold and asking for a date. Then getting sad or even mad that he didn't 'read her signals' and ask her out.
>>17253545
There's this woman I used to have on my FB, who posted a status about a guy approaching her as she exited a book store. She basically did it just to mock him and all the girls were cheering him on. Yeah, you go gurl, don't ever let some creep try to make conversation with you at a book store! And she's not the only one who acts like this. My sister used to post FB statuses about "thirsty guys" all the time.. I don't know why they do it, and it annoys the ever living piss out of me. So much arrogance.
You can't really expect everyone to wise up to your struggles and sympathize with it though. I know I don't. It's not because I dislike people that I feel like this (though I am a bit of a cynic), I've just learned to accept that you can't really rely on most people to understand or care.
But it's not about them, it's about you. Remember, you are doing this to get a girlfriend and make yourself happy. When you find her, none of the other bitches matter. Hell, a lot of them might look back and wonder what they missed out on, because of preselection. But that's their problem, not yours.
I need some advice adv. So, in the next couple months, I might be going up to Canada to hook up with this girl. Problem is, I'm a virgin fag. My biggest concern is that I will come way too fast. Any techniques, tips or tricks to last longer?
>>17253552
>a lot of them might look back and wonder what they missed out on
Based on every conversation with a female I've ever had, that is blatantly false. Most of them are too caught up in the moment to think about or reflect on consequences, past or future. That's why there are tons single moms wondering "where all the good guys went". I don't mean to sound like r9k, and I know that is a blanket statement. The few that break that mold are A) miserable bitches (had to live with one) or B) dangerously naive. So far, I've met 2 women who are exceptions. One is my younger brother's fiancé, and the other was a girl I knew in college.
>>17253560
I try to avoid making statements like "all women are X", however, I recognize there's a *lot* of women out there that aren't incredibly fit for relationships. I thought i twas only young ones that acted like this, but I see women of all ages doing this.
I don't even give much of a fuck about looks anymore. I'm not going to date somebody I'm not physically attracted to at all, but I'm simultaneously becoming more open about looks and more strict about personality/character. Being able to self reflect. Being responsible for ones' actions. Being able to apologize when wronging somebody else (and I mean a legit "I'm sorry" not "sorry you're upset" or "I didn't *mean* to......"). Acknowledging other people's emotions rather than pretending you can't really hurt people with what you say or do. Not thinking you are owed somebody who brings everything to the table, just because you bring *something* to the table. Demanding to be loved and cherished but not offering the same thing in return. To name a few....
What really gets me is this attitude about women and "leagues". Apparently just being able to doll up, with a nice pair of makeup and a good push up bra, makes women "high value" now. Shit, all of society is in on this. I will continue to try and keep an open mind on women and on people. I think women can be really beautiful, and sweet, and nice to be around as a hetero guy. But a part of growing up is also coming to terms with the shittier sides of humanity -and in our case specifically women - before accepting you can't really change people like that, and adjusting your expectations instead (but by no means settling on a shitty catch either).
>>17253467
>I can't pretend to understand why anyone would want or be ok someone coming up to them while they're shopping.
Yeah, I've always had trouble understanding why people advocate cold approaching so much. I can understand chatting them up in a class or some club or whatever, but I'm on edge when people try to talk to me during lecture let alone in an unfamiliar place.
>>17253596
If nothing else it gets guys out of their comfort zone and makes them comfortable with women in general, not just their little circle. This is often the kick in the ass guys need to get a girlfriend, especially if they struggle with it or never could get one.
I for one am sick of waiting around for something to fall into my lap or for that magical spark to happen. At the very least I am doing something for myself. If I can work on myself so that I am more attractive ton more women, which provides greater chances for intimacy, why wouldn't I do it?
>>17253606
>If nothing else it gets guys out of their comfort zone and makes them comfortable with women in general, not just their little circle.
Eh, its not because they're women for me, but because they're strangers. I wouldn't feel very comfortable doing anything with a stranger honestly and I would only assume that sentiment would be amplified if they'd struggle with being able to defend themselves.
As a guy these days attracting even an average girl is the hardest thing you'll likely ever do for a while, let alone attracting an actually attractive girl
>>17253581
Yea. Like I said, I can't say all because I know there are decent women that exist, but the ratio is fucked. It's not even their fault. Society treats them like pampered children, so they grow up to be pampered children. This next "generation" of women scares the shit out of me. They're being bred into an online society that worships uselessness and parroting because the person has a pair of tits and some makeup.
>>17253596
>>17253606
Getting out of a comfort zone is one thing, usually a good thing, but the older I get, the less appealing many of these women are. Their personalities are just vile, and as >>17253614
Said, even an average looking girl has a bloated ego because social media, and an actually attractive girl is most likely blasted by every guy with the guts to talk to her.
One thing I've noticed, and I'm not exaggerating here, is that every girl has a boyfriend, and not just as an excuse. I made a game of it in college. I'd talk to girls in class, just normal conversation and not making advances, and their BF would casually come up in conversation. For example, we were the first two to arrive in class, and we wound up talking about dogs. I mention that my mom breeds goldens, we share pictures we have, and out of nowhere "This is my BFs dog blah blah". It was uncanny. This happened even when I wasn't talking to them. They just mention it in class or I'd hear it in the hallways.
go to an army bar.
>>17253864
>What did he mean by this
>>17253614
Dam shame. We can't even lower our standards anymore because even below average girls are overentitled.
>>17253467
>>17253482
Look, as sentient meat, however illusory our identities are, we craft those identities by making value judgements. Everybody judges all the time. Now, you got a problem with that, you’re living wrong.
>>17253556
Google how to perform better in bed.
Fuck if I know.
I'm trying to learn with dealing with being a virgin but the only advice I get is "just stop caring" and I don't know how to just stop caring.
>>17253043
If you've been using the same approach for some ten years without success, then you need a new approach.
>>17253556
>>17253556
just bust a fat nut in her and if she complains jsut say sorry you're really hot, ill be good to go again in 10 mins
>>17252870
By having sex.
Go to bar/club.
Find chubby girl whos prob there with her hot friends. Buy her a drink, compliments, dance with her. Few seconds later she will give u BJ in bathroom 100%. Lower your standarts m8.
>>17254254
Show me some approach that work.
>>17253132
>>17253103
Might be harder to get away with then you think, there are giveaways
I lost my virginity aged 27 to my first ever gf. So yes, it is possible
She dumped me a couple of years later and I've been an incel again ever since
22 here so Im in a slightly better position, but I just finished uni and I'm still a kissless virgin so im slightly out of sorts.
Im actually a pretty outgoing person these days, I have a decent circle of friends and I can do ok talking to girls. I'm not super attractive and pretty spergy and weird though, and pretty much every girl I've fallen for I've been rejected by or has already been seeing someone.
I'm moving to London for a grad job so I'm hoping I can try and find someone there, but without the ready made social network that is University I'm gonna need to find ways to meet people. Also I feel like I should not go after girls at my job, at least not till I've been there for a while and only if I meet someone I really like. Also I wanna get my own place as soon as possible in the city away from home, since I find living my family really difficult after being away from them for so long.
I'm just pissed with myself for fucking around and wasting the last four years a little.
>>17255112
How does this even happen?
>>17255141
>22
You're in a much better position
BUt I remember telling myself that at a similar age saying, "i'm still young, i can get a girl soon enough"
What i would recommend is pushing yourself out of your comfort zone if you want to find a girl or just have sex.
I go to barnes and noble too many times for one person and I cannot recall strangers talking to each other. Just putting it out there, sad as it may be
I fucked a couple hookers at 26 because I was a virgin.
The hookers were 10/10. The sex was 0/10. Nothing like my faps to porn videos.
It's a good experience. It puts things into perspective, that sex isn't all that special. Plus it makes you less insecure about it.
>>17255287
>hookers
Okay friend.
Tell me what I must do to prepare for this.
How do you avoid getting wrecked by the law?
How do you avoid getting jumped?
How do i not get ripped off?
How do I avoid STDs (condoms can't protect you from everything).
What websites did you use (if you even used any).
Tell me what you did.
>>17255287
>sex isn't all that special.
I would say it's vital for people in relationships. I mean why do people consider it a big deal when their significant other is unfaithful?
Then again, nowadays people just fuck and don't care. Hell, some people encourage cheating nowadays because society is that promiscuous.
>>17255295
>Tell me what I must do to prepare for this.
You can't.
>How do you avoid getting wrecked by the law?
>How do you avoid getting jumped?
I live in the Netherlands, so don't ask me.
>How do i not get ripped off?
You need to make sure you negotiate everything up front. You want to spend this much time. You want to fuck her. You want her to stay if you cum until the time is up. You want her to take her clothes off. You want her feel her up. You want multiple positions.
Never give your money before you're done negotiating. If you don't do that they will always find new things to rip you off with.
You will probably not get it up right away or cum way too early, so you need to take that into account.
>How do I avoid STDs (condoms can't protect you from everything).
You could pick positions where you're more in control. If you are on top for example or do it doggy style then she can't rub her filthy cunt against your skin.
The first time I did it she was leaking her fluids all over me. I was worried for STD's for weeks, despite using a condom. But nothing ever happened.
Most prostitutes don't feel like getting STD"s themselves either. If they offer sex without a condom you should be worried.
>>17252870
I'm not a virgin, but I'm not sure if I quality.
In my mid twenties, had three substantial sexual experiences in college. Two lays and a grating BJ.
However I've never came during these. The BJ lasted like half an hour and the girl in question was rather toothy. First time I had the opportunity for sex I couldn't get an erection. I was incredibly drunk though so whisky dick is my go to as well as anxiety.
Second time was similar, I was less drunk and less anxious but couldn't maintain my erection. And the girl passed out as well so I kind of ejected from that situation.
Personally I haven't had sex since then. It's been a few years, I wank at least once a day. More than half of my brain is staring/thinking about girls/women like sexual objects. Not to say I don't want sweet love, but when the tank starts to fill up I start thinking with my other head completely.
To be honest. I'm a jaded fuck, I've spent years doing clubs and it's just a distasteful experience for me now. The thing is in the UK escorts are so easy to find and arrange for. It's reasonably cheap for an hour and all in all you can do whatever you want.
It's getting to the point where if I go out, find a bird, splash some cash on drinks and hopefully don't come across as a sociopath and an autistic NEET. There is still a chance they'll flake or won't put out at the end of the night.
Aside from developing a relationship which is not the intent at this stage, is it not better to spend near the cost of the previous experience on a girl that you've handpicked, looked over and communicated with. She'll most likely do everything you want and you can be yourself, not worrying about acting a certain way or stifling yourself.
It's not a long term solution, but fuck it has to be an invigorating experience. Most girls I've seen are local attractive college types and birds who realize that it's a booming industry that pays. There is nothing inhumane about it, so why should there be a stigma?
>>17255433
Also I should mention, in UK it is incredibly easy to look over escort sites which provide logistical and statistical information down to reviews and comments.
All you have to do is ring them, have a small chat and arrive at their place at the time.
I'd do it myself but I have serious self esteem and body issues. It's ironic, I won't go out and pull birds because I'm turning into a slob, but I also can't book a girl because I'll psych myself out about how disgusting I am even though I'm paying her.
Literally the easiest way to do it is either pick up a barfly they always put out, but don't go to their place it's usually a wreck and disgusting, and don't take them to yours for obvious reasons, either fuck them in your car or at a motel. Fat girls are also an easy way too since they're the most desperate and usually too timid to confront you later. Source: Me convincing literally every fat girl that i worked with to give me anal, it's not a glamorous life but I'd be lying if i didn't say it was addicting.
>>17254803
Just go up to a random girl on the street and ask:
>"Would you like to have some s-s-sex? I... I have money..."
Should work every time.
>>17255479
>Source: Me convincing literally every fat girl that i worked with to give me anal, it's not a glamorous life but I'd be lying if i didn't say it was addicting.
I know this isn't an exact science could you write up some guidelines for that, and/or maybe a couple of stories? Thanks in advance.
Fat guy reporting in. I feel for OP. It will take me years to fix my body enough for even an average woman to want to fuck me and I don't want to wait years. I'm thinking I'll save up some money and hire a banging hot whore who will "overlook" my fatness. At least this way I'll know what it's like to fuck an attractive woman before I'm inevitably stuck with an ugly/fat girl the rest of my life since that's the best I'll ever do.
>>17255515
The biggest thing is hygiene, bathe at least every other day and remember to wash you hair at least twice a week. It seems like that goes without saying but you'd be surprised how much more confident you feel by knowing you don't smell like cheese. The next thing is no matter how disgusted you are by your quarry try to at least acknowledge her in passing (this literally means the world to them and they'll think you're a nice guy for it). After a while step up the casual acknowledgement to casual conversation even if it's about bullshit at work or asking if they can give you a hand with something or if you could borrow something for work like a scanner or a stapler w/e. Before you know it they'll either passively tell their other coworkers that you're a sweet guy and if they can talk to you for them, be careful because sometimes they'll go full stalker mode if that happens abandon ship!
>>17255545
Wall of text continued
Eventually they'll start sitting with you on lunch or going out of their way to see you this is where you can easily get their phone number or set up a bs date, if you set it up alright you get to bone them in anyway you like then toss them to the garbage with easy excuses like "I'm going through some things" "This is getting too serious for me right now" or my personal favorite "Sorry, I don't date my coworkers" usually you can bang them for a few weeks before they get the idea and get fed up with you but by then you've already got the next one primed up and ready to go! Yes this seems excessive just to bang some fatty but the fact that A: It's free and B: You literally get to do as you please with them and C: It's piss easy make it worth it.
>>17255545
>The biggest thing is hygiene, bathe at least every other day and remember to wash you hair at least twice a week.
I got that covered at least. I'd feel filthy as fuck if I didn't bathe every day to begin with.
There's this chubby girl at my office seems sweet, but despite her cute face and nice rack I can't help it so far, I'm just not attracted to her. So right now it's not just about getting her warmed up to me, but the other way around as well. I'm working on increasing face time but so far we don't seem to click at all.
>>17255561
Doesn't word get around the office though? I mean, that certainly seems to be how it is where I work, some guys have gotten a reputation to the point where others will proactively warn newly-hired girls to watch out for them.
>>17255582
Just keep your eye on the prize! Be fake as fuck if you have to just to get in there, you're not looking for a wife or a girlfriend, you're looking for an easy lay. Just think about it as swallowing your medicine yes it sucks but you'll feel better afterwards. Also if she has a cute face and a nice rack that's a bonus.
>>17255590
Like wildfire, but in my job i get to transfer a lot to different locations. Also if you're not a total sperg and have a decent attitude at work most people will write it off as "You mean anon? He wouldn't do that he's a nice guy to everyone, she must have gotten the wrong idea."
Losing the V card is overrated and over time if it was for all the wrong reasons you will regret it, try getting a gf first
>>17255605
While it is blown out of proportion i will say that once you do lose it you realize there's way more important things to preoccupy yourself with almost like a burden is lifted off your chest
>>17255605
Then how do you get a first girlfriend if you are over 25? Isn't your life pretty much settled by that point?
>>17255599
I'm going to have to take this one real slow anyway, since I'm currently working on a close friend of hers (another coworker). In fact, this one's hot and I'm already both interested in her as a person and attracted to her physically without having to "convince" myself like I'd have to with the chubby one.
Thanks for your advice all the same.
Yes you can.
Just talk to someone. Sex isn't science and we as a generation have been seen conditioned to think sex is hard for anyone who isn't cool or whatever.
Your parents made you, right? I'm going to go out on a limb here and say your parents weren't a Barbie and Ken.
Find someone, get to know them, on the 3 or 4th date, try to make some moves.
It is not hard. It is something instinctual that everyone can do.
>>17255276
I've been doing that more the last two years, asking girls out and such. I feel like I'm taking a different tack, I don't actually know anyone in a relationship who met the person they're with my asking them out traditionally.
I sometimes suspect people at my Uni are unusually emotionally fucked up, I'm hoping I'll meet a better range of people when I start working and meeting people in the city. Everyone at University has some emotional problem or something.
>>17255628
Actually, my dad was a musician and did some pretty big gigs like opening for the Hooters, and my mom is a dog breeder with vet tech experience. So...
>>17255610
It felt like i pulled the weight off my chest and put it on hers but i took her V card as well, now shes uncomfortable with other guys because shes basically used to me and only me not to mention the impact its had on her dating life. In a different world i feel like i should have waited but there's a stigma to staying a virgin and society as a whole thinks sex will solve all there problems instead of create new ones.
>>17255696
Are you still a major factor in her life? If no get over it she's an adult and she needs to figure her own life out
I honestly don't understand sex. Or more like, I don't understand the basics leading up to sex.
I understand dating, and sex itself, but everything from getting a girl into your room to taking off her clothes to finally inserting your penis, I don't understand. You can't just ask, "do you want to have sex" unless you're already in a relationship and up until that it's a bunch of subtle movements that if you suddenly go too far it's not good enough.
As far as human interactions goes, I feel left out of seduction, as I can't relate to anyone in it at all.
I guess I could always lower my standards to girls that are 3/10 or below...
>>17255654
I can relate somewhat. Every girl in my college was either already with somebody or wasn't with anyone because of baggage. That and their insane standards for themselves and others; nobody's good enough to grace their presence.
I hope I can meet somebody somewhere at some point. Nothing ever works out. Most of the women never invest. The ones that do end up flaking eventually. My height has a lot to do with it. Women love tall guys so much and so I have to make up for being short since most women do not want to be with a man shorter than themselves, unless he is very cool and people respect him. Vs a taller guy who isn't all that but it's ok cause he's tall lol
OP do you think your looks effect your situation at all?
>>17255713
You have to pretend getting in her pants is the last thing you want to do, instead the first thing you want to do is kiss her hold her and hear her problems this is a trick consciously or subconsciously to make sure if that condom breaks you will stick around.
A whole lot of women these days don't seem to have that capacity any more but that's another discussion the majority of them do, they want to know your invested long term lower tier girls whether due to confidence issues or bad looks don't have the same inclination they will melt from your kisses because they cant be picky and know most men wont stay.
Be loving and caring enough or faking it enough and the woman your with will be the first to ask you for sex and not the other way around, if not there are other methods.
>>17254232
Just occupy your time to stop thinking about it. That's pretty much what I've done.
>>17255628
We need to save the future of men!
https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg22630200-800-men-disconnected-philip-zimbardos-lament-on-the-male/
I think I'm in the collection of fucked. I'm 27 and have never had a girlfriend. Part of the reason is 20 years of depression, I was 6 or 7 when I was first diagnosed, and all through grade school, I was picked on and really only had one friend, who was really a shitty person in retrospect. The worst part was that it was a small school, so nothing changed from grade to grade. It was the same 80 kids split between 3 classrooms. I switched schools in 8ths grade to a much bigger school, and I was invisible. I did some lifting twice a week and sort of had a friend there, but not really. I didn't really have a group of friends until like late 9th grade in a totally new school, which then got fucked after my parents moved an hour away.
My problem is deep rooted depression and a nonexistant self esteem. I am literally incapable of thinking that anyone would want to be with me, and even if I found someone who insisted, I would just break their heart and make them miserable. There's no hope for people like me.
>>17253535
>15 year gap
Man, a 4-6 year gap gives me a noticeable level of disconnect between people I know, a 15 year gap would be too much in someone I would be interested in.
Also the thing in these type of threads is they skim over the fact that 25+ virgins are usually lacking in the friends department. I know I am, I mean if they don't have people to talk to just generally, trying to move beyond small talk is almost impossible:
>I honestly don't understand sex. Or more like, I don't understand the basics leading up to sex.
Especially considering the fact that to be a 25+ virgin, you either have to be religious (most religious people I know aren't virgins) and/or sheltered to the point where you don't have many experiences beyond telly and vidya.
My peers/contemporaries(?) all have little bits of flair I guess you could call it, tattoos, highlights, piercings, etc. I'm a drab, dry person next to them.
It's basically an uphill struggle that doesn't get any easier. Being a virgin isn't bad, it's all the events, or lack of, that lead you to being 25+ virgin that's bad.
>>17256056
>25 year old virgins are lacking in the friends dept
I'm a 28 year old virgin and I have many friends. So many that I often don't have time to give to each group. I'm a virgin because I'm fat and I have absolutely zero confidence when it comes to women. I assume that they want nothing to do with me romantically. I can makes friends with them easily but I'm never a romantic interest to them. Just that funny polite fat guy which is 100% my fault. I will never blame someone else for my situation.
While stereotypes often have a some truth to them they don't always apply.
>>17252870
You'd resort to rape before a prostitute?
>>17256088
I did say usually, though I don't understand how, if you are capable of making friends, end up a virgin?
Me, I barely understand how to talk (I'm exaggerating slightly) to people.
>>17256088
That is basically how I am, except with destructive depression thrown into the mix. Or at least, that's how I was. I don't really have friends anymore. A few people online, but most of friends in real life have moved on, or are moving on.
Some people are just meant to be alone.
>>17256107
A combination of being fat, ugly, and having no confidence when it comes to dating. Anytime I get an inkling of attraction for a woman I can't shake the thought of "she could do so much better than me" or "there's no way we'd work". Often enough I'm right. She eventually dates someone much more attractive than I am.
>>17256113
I also think I might have a form of depression. I have to keep it internalized because I can't let anyone know what I'm actually thinking. I have to stay upbeat or pass it off as "I'm tired/rough workday/etc"
>>17253409
That is why you're not getting any
Alpha up and talk to her
It will be hard at first, changing yourself
But you must push throw. No pain no gain
>>17253440
Most are rackets
Those girls get a commission
>>17256127
You and me both. Don't self diagnose, though. That will just make things worse.
The lies, though. That's all I feel like I do when I talk to people. I just lie through a mask because no one actually cares more than small talk. You can't disrupt the status quo.
im 22, and i lost my virginity a few weeks ago, and now i am in a relationship with the girl who i lost it to. i told her i have not had sex for 2 years. she has no idea that i was a virgin.
>>17256136
I disagree about the status quo. I don't tell anyone because at my core I believe my problems and feelings are stupid. I think they're (my problems/feelings) so bad that any normal person would laugh at me. You're fat? Go workout fatty. You're ugly? Skin care products/surgery/gym. You aren't confident? Man the fuck up. All my problems are easy to fix yet I don't fix them. I couldn't take the embarrassment.
>>17252870
Boy, time to use that last resort as your first priority.
>>17256141
And they all spout the same thing in order to keep the status quo. They don't want to deal with problems they can't relate to, so they attack the symptom not the cause. Why? They can relate to someone being overweight, so they tell them to hit the gym. They can't imagine a depressive state of mind and how suffocating it is, so they associate it with being sad. To a normal person, hitting the gym is effective at both losing weight and increasing happiness, so it's an obvious answer.
>>17256127
>A combination of being fat, ugly, and having no confidence when it comes to dating. Anytime I get an inkling of attraction for a woman I can't shake the thought of "she could do so much better than me" or "there's no way we'd work". Often enough I'm right. She eventually dates someone much more attractive than I am.
But you can talk to them, right? Beyond small talk into general conversation?
Cos I can't, hell, it literally takes me years just to warm up to people.
>>17253081
This. One girl on tinder apologized to me for the slow response due to the fact she was juggling 17 different conversations.
>>17256162
I see your point now. I can agree somewhat. People in general don't want to necessarily hear about all your deep issue which makes for very status quo conversations. Also, empathy is difficult to come by when you can't understand someone's situation and you think the solution is so easy.
>>17256178
Yes. I can easily talk to them. I have plenty of friends that are women. A few of my very close friends are women. It might take you years to warm up to them but you're probably damn sure by that time that you want to keep those people around, yeah?
>>17256178
Not him, but I can talk to people just fine. It's a lot of faking and pretending, but I can do it. Taking it any further than that? I just can bring myself to do it for most of the same reasons >>17256127 said.
There were times when I think that something might have happened. The last time still haunts me. I was in chemistry in college, and it was a hard class. Hard enough that we started with a classroom full of students and only 3 of us took the finale. There was a girl there, cute in a very plain sort of way. She struck me because she seemed older than everyone else there, and I was older myself.
At first, she kind of ignored me, not on purpose, but there's nothing outwardly special about me. However, science always came naturally to me, and I would answer questions no one knew or correct others. Eventually, she started asking me for help, comparing homework, ect, instead of the other guys. Our 3rd lab is when we were lab partners for the first time because her partner, another girl, had dropped. We started studying together, did lab reports together, texted notes and other stuff.
I remember one time in lab, we were testing for hydrogen release from a synthetic decomposition, and we tested by lighting it on fire. Everyone else got some little pops from their tube, but we had this huge loud pop-roar, which was supposed to happen. We were laughing, and when the teacher looked to see who it was, she just said, oh of course it's anon. It was that lab that I thought maybe I have a chance with someone. I pushed it a little, she didn't seem to object. We were supposed to go for a long walk though a local state park after the semester was over and we had time.
She got accepted into a program she was trying to get into, and didn't need those credits anymore. She was not one of the 3 on finals day, and I never saw her again. It tore me up more than I thought it would. That's my life, though. That's just how my life goes.
>>17256196
>It might take you years to warm up to them but you're probably damn sure by that time that you want to keep those people around, yeah?
Probably, if I had any female friends. Or many male ones either to be honest.
>>17256145
Like you did?
Thanks for the encouragement.
>>17256056
>>17256088
27 kissless virgin and never even have had a gf.
Have a decently sized group of friends I shoot the shit with.
Used to not care about being a virgin and immerse myself in work - I was a massive nerd in middle and high school and found myself with a software dev job at 14 so all my focus was in making money/getting job exp.
Then at 20 it dawned on me that I'm still a virgin. Worked more. 24 I started getting worried. Suppressed worry with more work.
I try to make small talk with women but once they start getting flirty or a group I'm with starts talking about past relationships crippling anxiety kicks in and I have to get the fuck out of there. They'll know.
Pretty sure I'm an aspie on top of all of that but I was never officially diagnosed.
After experimenting with ecstasy and marijuana I feel like a lot of walls have been knocked down and I'm back to not really caring about the whole situation and feeling like I'm in the place I currently need to be at.
Now I'm not even so much concerned with losing my virginity or even having a girlfriend. I want a better job and a wife.
>>17256279
>a group I'm with starts talking about past relationships crippling anxiety kicks in and I have to get the fuck out of there.
I know that feeling real well.
>>17255456
You're probably fuck ugly but I really mean it when I say you won't be the ugliest she's ever seen (at absolute worst you might make the top 20)
Lots of hookers take disabled clients so I promise that you won't be the most awkward either
Drastically lower your standards. A lot of virgins have trouble with this. If you can't get past that, then it's time to find yourself a hooker.
>>17256331
My only standard is that they're not fat. I have had mostly horrible experiences with fat women. I'd rather stay lonely for life than deal with another fatty.
>>17256331
I can't aim lower than fatties on scooters can I? I mean, all the single girls in my area are 7+/10 and the rest are in relationships. (It's a funny thing, that there more fit girls cos of gentrification.)
I think I'm done with whining about the fact that I'm a virgin. It's not really anyone else's fault but mine that I'm horribly uninteresting and passive-aggressive. No one owes me anything and there is no necessity to anything. I guess it's just best to accept it.
>>17256482
Go away, false-flagging chad.
>>17256317
What's strange and amusing to me about it is that all of my friends think I'm like "The Most Interesting Man In the World" because I never participate in relationship and bedroom shenanigans talk. They're convinced I'm some sort of master "ladies' man" who can drop panties with just a look.
They'd be floored if they found out the truth.
>>17256527
How the hell did you convince them that?
What do you say when they ask you about that? I want people to think that about me too.
>>17252870
Try grindr
>>17256534
No clue. I usually deflect the conversation and shift it to something unrelated.
Or truthfully, but in a joking manner, say I was too busy slaying dragons with my group as a battle cleric to worry about girls.
They think it's a funny joke. The sad fact is that it's true. Between EverQuest and work and the occasional beer at a friend's place there was room for nothing else in my life.
>>17256603
You must be a pretty decent looking fellow then.
>>17256527
>>17256603
Are you the dude that was posting the other day about his friends and family members telling him to go fuck a bunch of whores in a joking way?
>>17256331
Lower your standards to...what, exactly?
>>17256731
not him, but even obese women probably have a sense of overentitlement.
We might as well just go for escorts.
>This thread everyday until summer is over
>HEY GUISE IM GOIN TO COLLEGE HOW DO I HAVE SEX
>HEY GUISE IM A DINOSAUR AT AGE 21 IS THERE HOPE
>HEY GUISE IM GOIN TO HIGH SCHOOL HOW DO I INTO PENIS INTO VAJAYJAY
Putting your 2 incher into a woman won't fix your life
>>17256821
>i can't be bothered to read anything in this thread
>>17256056
>My peers/contemporaries(?) all have little bits of flair I guess you could call it, tattoos, highlights, piercings, etc. I'm a drab, dry person next to them.
>Being a virgin isn't bad, it's all the events, or lack of, that lead you to being 25+ virgin that's bad.
I think this is my biggest problem. I may not be a model, but I've seen fatass ugly guys talk about their gfs and such. Most of the time they have personalities and things to talk about. It's weird that I find there talks to be boring, but I think it may be personality and tone that gets them good reception from others.
>>17256906
Thanks for the contribution.
>>17252870
why last resort? you are 25 fucking years old. youve put the pussy on so high pedastal by now that you need a fucking step car to reach it.
go fuck a hooker. get it of your system and when you see that sex is not a big deal. its not love and not gona make you whole. maby you can relax and find a girl to have fun with
>>17256534
I think unless you obviously look like a typical people tend to give you the benefit of the doubt.
>>17256534
I think unless you obviously look like a typical virgin people tend to give you the benefit of the doubt.
>>17252870
Have sex, that should solve the problem.
>>17257396
How enlightening.
>>17252870
Just get a hooker. You probably think sex is this big fucking deal (it's not) and your life will be drastically different after (it won't). Only difference is you'll think it's less of a big deal and it'll make it easier to relate to other people.
Also physiologically speaking circulating sexual energy with a partner is really good for you. Since it's been 25 years I'm guessing your body's sexual energy circulation isn't great and sex would open you up a bit.
>>17256821
>>17257232
>>17257396
>>17257515
>sex isn't a big deal
Kinda glossing over my point that
>Being a virgin isn't bad, it's all the events, or lack of, that lead you to being 25+ virgin that's bad.
>25+ virgins are usually lacking in the friends department. Keyword=usually
>>17253981
getting rammed by a strapon tomboy
>>17257515
If I'm in the US, what should I do to not get STDs and not get arrested?
I have no physical and two major psychological issues considering losing virginity:
1) First girl should be a special girl.
She should evoke intense feeling with her presence (means she must be beautiful in my eyes), she should understand and support me.
But you know how hard it is to get such a girl for a 19 year old kissless virgin just due to the lack of experience, excluding factors like personality.
However I don't want to "gather experience" with the girls towards whom I don't have any particular feelings.
2) We will eventually break up. How intimate should I be with her? Will I regret being too intimate with a girl?
2bh, I had various opportunities to lose my virginity, but I always refused because of the reasons listed.
Late twenties virgin here. Being sexless for so long had twisted my mind. My main desire is women. I am addicted to strippers, cam girls, and various porn because attractive women are the only thing that I want that I have never been able to get. My yearning for the touch of good looking women is so strong that I liken it to a drug. I get withdrawals after a couple weeks. My mind is broken. I only look forward to my next paycheck so that I can justify spending more money to get that sweet sweet touch.
>>17253434
I will be your gf if you don't mind a fatty.
Like in between chub and bbw moreso
>>17257944
You're probably not in the US anyways.
>>17254814
Like?
>>17258041
Some people have that look that screams they don't get sex.
>>17257875
Dude, you're 19.
>>17256054
I'm 27 too and you are literally me except I was never officially diagnosed with depression, but I'm pretty sure I've had one ever since I started going to school. I think I was diagnosed with ADHD at some point though
>>17256694
I've been told I'm handsome on a number of occasions. I personally don't think I'm all that great looking.
>>17256729
No, but my parents were so concerned about me being a virgin that on my 18th birthday they sat me down and, with a seriousness about them that suggested maybe my dog just got run over by a car, tell me that they would take me to the bunny ranch in nevada for my 18th birthday present.
I was kind of shocked and disgusted at the same time that they would suggest such a thing. The only thing creepier than parents buying their son a whore would be the mom offering to let him fuck her. They were baffled when I was like absolutely fucking not.
>>17252870
I lost my virginity in my late 30's. I had to manipulate a lesbian in her late 20's crisis. I think that is the point, knowing who, how and when you can ask for sex, not the act itself.
>>17258102
This is true. Despite being a 25-yr-old kissless virgin I have cultivated my appearance such that everyone assumes I get pussy on the daily. Sometimes the conversation turns towards women and I have to pokerface my fear of someone asking me for advice or to tell a story.
>>17258219
I just tell people that I don't have time, which was true for awhile with work and school. Mostly though, people just stopped asking.
>>17258194
Wow you turned that down? What the fuck, man? Can I have your parents instead?
>>17258260
Yeah I don't need my parents holding my hand to fuck and I certainly wouldn't care for them to know the date, time, and place I lost my virginity.
My parents have traditionally been extremely conservative so this was beyond out of character for them.
>>17258270
They were probably checking if you were gay and you just confirmed all of their fears. Either that or they were using redneck logic to check for mental illness.
>(in Hank Hill voice)
>He don't want women, that boy just ain't right.
Have realistic expectations and always be aware of your social status.
>>17258270
Other parents were wiser. Told the kid to go to Ireland to see his clay and sleep in the town hostel. The owner came later at night and asked him if he wanted a girl...
Step 1. Don't mention you're a virgin
Step 2. If it comes up, lie. Doesn't have to be a monumental one. In fact, giving less details makes you seem mysterious.
Step 3. Go to the internet/dating websites/ public places, and start scouting out a suitable hole to fuck.
Step 4. She doesn't have to be Miss America. Just fuck some bitches. Wear a condom. Quit bein' a puss.
Step 5. Enjoy your time of being single while you have it.
>>17258270
They won't be holding your hand. Instead you get to fuck arguably the most attractive woman you'll probably ever get to for free. I'd take that in a fucking heartbeat.
>>17258279
Except me being gay would be counter to all of the porn they found prior.
>>17258289
I dunno. If I ever had a kid I wouldn't be meddling in his or her sexual business short of making sure they stay safe.
>>17258326
Arguably is the key word there.
I'm struggling to understand how you don't think it's weird in the slightest for a parent to pay for their kid to have sex.
>>17258550
Are your parents eastern european or something?
>>17257875
>19
/adv/ really needs a higher age limit.
>>17258550
Its only weird if you make it weird. I'd slap my pops on the back and thank him for his generous gift. Then after I was done we'd talk about how great her ass was or whatever. Either way, you'd be getting laid for free on your parents dime.
>>17258647
Well this was almost 10 years ago anyways so it doesn't really matter now.
And it isn't me making it weird. These people are fucked up and I didn't trust them at all due to their tendencies to be manipulative and, often, incredibly passive-aggressive. Any generosity on their part could easily be a set up of some sort. It wasn't unusual to be offered to buy me my favorite dessert just to hang that over my head and make me clean the garage or weed the backyard. I stopped eating dessert.
>>17258627
What is the relevancy of this?
>>17258664
Oh. I'm sorry OP. That's terrible. Parents should offer that gift to you out the goodness of their hearts not as a way to guilt and manipulate you.
>>17258193
Don't self diagnose. You probably are, but go see someone before you trick yourself into thinking it's worse than it is. If you're 27 like me, then everyone was diagnosed with ADHD. It was the meme illness when we were growing up.
>>17258194
This is a stereotypical thing to say, but if other people genuinely say you're handsome, then you probably are at least a little bit. As long as these people aren't family members or something, you're probably at least above average. You can't see it because you don't want to see it. You want to be this person with shitty social skills and no self esteem because it's easy. That's something only you can fix, and if you can't, then I would probably suggest therapist. Maybe then you can get to the real root, be it shit that can be talked out or legit bad wiring that needs meds.
>>17258037
I am ahaha
>>17258664
>What is the relevancy of this?
It's not really relavant, it's that I used to hear about this about some parts of eastern europe or rich arabs.
>>17258288
I am painfully aware of my social status when I wear my shitty uniform to work on a bus full of yuppies and hipsters wearing designer clothing.
>>17258219
If women ask you about your relationships, it could mean that they are interested in you as more than a friend.
>>17259200
Then what? Tell them you're a 27khv who's never had a relationship or say you have a few things here and there and potentially have one based on a lie? Sounds like a catch 22 to me.
>>17259214
No, just joke about it. Talk about your imaginary girlfriend or some shit. Or just laugh and say "oh, I don't have one".
You don't have to make a big deal, I'm just saying. That's only sort of easy for me to say because I'm a 24 y/o virgin myself. But I know that if you act like a guy that has "value" (this just means making other people feel good), it'll draw women to you and make them want to sleep with you. Focus on making women feel good and she won't even think to ask if you're a virgin. If she does find out, she'll wonder why you were sexless for so long.
And as far as making people feel good goes: be funny, compliment them at times, invite them places to show you're a fun person to be around. People want to date and sleep with fun people.
I watched a lot of porn as a hobby (amateur porn is best porn for learning), couple of cunnilingus tutorial and a pair of balls to date a girl on Tinder, lie about your sexual partners (have 2 or 3 max), apply whatever you learned.
I learn a lot of anything by just watching and I have good condition and nothing is too hard to achieve, so that worked for me. I'm like fucking Marvel's Taskmaster though.
>>17258920
What state hahaha
No OP, the moment anyone finds out they will start puking and calling you names. Red flag they'll yell, a man virgin!
Seriously, very few people will give a fuck and if you are with a girl that likes you and is capable of compassion she'll accept it or even be turned on by the idea.
I lost my virginity at 23 and the girl I was with didn't even notice because clearly she was used to having really crappy sex. That's something I think that's not mentioned enough. Sure a lot of people are sluts, but if they've only had a few sexual partners themselves it's quite possible other people 25 or under don't have much real experience. You're worried that she'll know, but most of the guys she's slept with have been sloppy teenagers and 20-year-olds.
If you take your time, act considerately, and have fun she's really not going to give a crap. If she is younger and you say "just tell me what to do to get you off", it might be the first time she's ever gotten fucked properly.
How to do it? For most people that are older virgins it's a choice. It might not seem like it, but you are choosing not to social or build relationship with girls right now. All you can do is start.
For me yes, but i don't want to tbqh. I've met tons of slutty women but losing my virginity to them won't improve my life in any way. It would be like learning to swim in polluted waters.
Not OP
>>17259956
>you are choosing not to social or build relationship with girls right now. All you can do is start.
That's right. I lost my v-card at 24 with a hooker. After that I become a bit more confident with women but I can't pick up them yet.
I try to go in the street to push some XX human beings but I do something wrong and I can't find what and so I can't improve my game.
Sorta like the blind leading the blind here.
>>17253035
Any tips for keeping your game up when you're married? I don't know how to navigate things anymore
>just lie
lol why
im 23 and when asked i say yes with 0 shame
why are you people so pathetic
Not a virgin but not had sex for 6 years so its pretty much the same thing
How would you go about getting the confidence for dating when you have a medical issue [spoiler] namely incontinence and wearing nappies because of it[/spoiler] and have also been in a dry spot for so long?
>>17260678
Your problem is beyond this thread's scope.
>>17252870
You know, speaking as a 26KV, if we could solve the issue of meeting and actually connecting with other people, not just for getting laid, this would be so much of an issue.
>>17261011
*not be so much
>>17260678
>never experiencing something and not doing it for 6 years is the same thing
2010 seems like yesterday, you disgusting normie
>>17260555
Because at 23, there's potential for it be endearing and maybe even mysterious because it's the college age. At 27+, the assumption can be made that if after 27 years you've had zero experience, you have nothing to offer, and your chances of finding anyone plummet exponentially. This current generation makes that especially true because fornthebaverage person, having sex and finding relationships is not only easier, but assumed thanks the Internet and online dating.
>>17261131
>incontinent
>normie
>>17261511
its not endearing
its not anything
its piddly unimportant rubbish
>>17261887
Kinda unclear on what you are trying to say.
>>17261936
I think he's trying say that it doesn't matter when it clearly does, so he's just using random adjectives. It might not have matter 10 years ago, but times have changed significantly.
>>17261887
Prove that it doesn't matter.
>>17261959
>I think he's trying say that it doesn't matter when it clearly does
It's not a totally baseless assumption to make about someone and I don't think the assumption is made with bad intentions.
>>17261959
i cant prove anything to you, any reasoning would be dismissed in the most limpdick, passive aggressive way
thats why r9k exists to contain your shit
>>17262012
Explain. I'm not expressing any r9k sentiments, I'm just saying.
>>17262012
>limp dick passive aggressive way
Do go on making presumptions about people while telling people not to make presumptions about people.
>>17256928
>have personalities and things to talk about
I don't think I could keep a conversation going on for more than 5 minutes before running out of things to talk about. Thank god, gaming is popular these days otherwise I'd have nothing to talk or just look like an autist who talks about nothing else.
>>17262098
i didnt say anything about presumptions and ill make plenty
i said its pathetic to lie about your virginity because you care that much about it
im open about it when asked and the response was moving the goal posts that 23 isnt old enough to be ashamed of it but somehow 27 is
but the big secret is no one fucking cares!
why dont you just stop whining about it and move on with your life, i dont even need to have had sex to see how warped r9k's views on sex are, its a total perversion of reality
go outside and make something of yourself, it takes a straight up nigger to base self worth on how often your dick gets wet
>>17262153
>i said its pathetic to lie about your virginity
Not disagreeing
>go outside and make something of yourself, it takes a straight up nigger to base self worth on how often your dick gets wet
You're a myopic idiot.
If you cant man up let someone else be the man.
>>17262153
It's not self worth, but the worth seen by others. You're an idiot if you honestly think there's no difference between being a virgin at 23 and being a virgin at 27.
Being 23 is still the college life, the bar life, most 23 year olds still have zero responsibility, or maybe they're working a shitty job and sharing rent with a bunch of friends. If you're a virgin, no one really cares, just like you said. Ask friends if anyone knows about a party and hook up there. Many girls think it's cute, and some even have a fetish for it.
At 27, things are different. For most people, college is done, parties are over, friends have moved on and you're down to a core group, most people have had some kind of relationship lasting more than a year, and people are working a job that pays the bills, maybe 2 if needed. If you've never had a relationship at this point, nevermind sex, you're pretty shit out of luck because you lack the experience. This is the age where people are looking for that person they want to eventually settle down with in a few years because everyone's already worked out the dos and donts of a basic relationship.
I'm not saying it's impossible at 27, but the older you get, the less likely it becomes.
>>17262564
What's the point of bumping man?
We're just stuck.
>tfw completely uninterested in losing my virginity at this point, but considering hiring a dominatrix soon
I'm interested in what would happen after paying for a hooker to take your virginity. I mean, I'd feel like the same awkward bastard afterwards.
>>17262771
You have sex. What's to understand?
It doesn't magically make you a better person, but at least you won't have to worry about being a virgin. Pic related.
>>17262122
Don't rely on gaming though.
Then you'll be known as the "gamer"
>>17252957
Dating sites gave me zero results after using them for months.
I have no idea how you approach people irl.
>>17263420
If you ask here, they will k tell you to walk up and talk to them. Just be yourself
>>17263371
I know, which is why I barely speak. The only meet with other people is at work so it's a moot point
>am scared of being intimate with anyone
>get flustered and red faced when a cute girl even touches me
>tfw I will never pay an escort from being too shy/scared and embarrassed
26 virgin here,
I'm tall rich and white btw, people say i'm the friendliest guy they know; but a life of being ridiculed as the nerd with no friends in school crippled me socially, and even the thought of dating a girl I'm talking to will turn my face red and shut my brain down, making me look like I have autism, which is why I stopped thinking about it.
I honestly think I will never have a gf/wife or family.
>>17263971
>rich
a gold digger will fuck you until your nuts will fall off if you marry her without a prenup
