Meditate or go to church. Or do something spiritual. Sounds like you're getting disconnected from your spirituality.

>>17251500

>my mind races with all my longings but can't keep up with what I've got.

Welcome to the world of ennui. There is nothing you can do to stop it.

Get out in nature and immerse yourself in the physical world. That is what has helped me best.

Yeah this one drives me mad as well. Without purpose how do we define value and meaning? Purpose is often connected with a want or need, but in the absence of either we've got to try and find it as an individual. Previously why did I do something? I just had to do it. Why? Because I was trying to prevent myself going mad through self loathing due to inactivity.

A friend of mine just talked about going through that, before he joined the hackerspace, so maybe that might help you if there's a hackerspace or makerspace in your area.

I'd get bored with anything if it was just sitting alone. Meetup with others who share your interests and hobbies.

I didn't think about it too much before because I was always chasing after something trying to meet goals. The struggle didn't leave much time for self reflection and often the practical action part of things led on to further things and offers and opportunities which meant I was truly busy.

Then I stopped being in 5 bands because a proper job took off. Finally got a car, then fixed it up so it was reliable and no longer a liability. Friends moved out of the house share we lived in and moved on and then I bought a house and fixed that up so nothing needing immediately doing. It was like coming out of a 3 year coma or something finding myself without a list of jobs which needed doing and a regular manageable routine.

I started a band again. Interaction with people generally produces prompts which require action or activity which requires research and planning and ideas and stuff and again here we go.

Thing is, because I'm so aware of this need and what the absence of it feels like, I struggle with the idea that by bringing this into my life in the first place I'm acting dishonestly because it is an active choice to bring it upon myself. It is quite a luxury to be frustrated by situations and confrontation because otherwise where do I put my thoughts and energy?

We strive for this idealised zen like state where our needs and drives are met and minimised and we are finally free, but finally free to be what exactly? Infinite nothingness is like some sort of sensory deprivation torture. Friends might piss us off, but imagine the alternative, far worse to simply be irrelevant.