Explain this fear to me.

What exactly do you fear? Around what kind of people do you get this fear? Do you feel more comfortable by yourself?

Alcohol

>>17243839
Kek

>>17243839
They don't call it social lubricant for nothing.

Alcohol helps OP, but many introverts become weird when drunk, so I would refrain until you learn how to be comfortable around people when sober.

>>17243824
Beta blockers and self immersion>>17243836

>>17243836
I think I basically fear what they think, but im not sure. Its like a mix of lack of trust/security and trying to keep them from thinking im crazy or something. I guess I fear really clean and normal white people, the very christian kind that talk of mundane things. When im alone (and think im alone) I can breathe and jump around and do whatever the fuck i feel like.

>>17243859
This became interesting.

What exactly do you fear about Christian white people? Do you feel they judge you?

>>17243864
Not specifically those, just any normal sterile people. I just happen to be around christian whites alot, or at least during hs. Maybe this is all because of lack of social contact throughout my life? I went to a special counselor alot during elementary cause I never focused in class, goofed alot and always had to catch up with the rest. Middle schl I was prty weird, heard I was twitchy, and I would bother or annoy my fellow classmates and could never discuss with them. And hs was a mess.

I also feel upset when left alone around too many people, like I feel I would panic. Fear and sadness

>>17243893
Hmm.

I believe that subconsciously you feel like an outcast(due to your adolescent rejection from your peers) and that makes you uneasy and nervous around sterile or "normal" people.

It sounds like you have an inferiority complex. I have battled with one myself, and continue to do so. I recommend you learn your strengths and expand upon them.

Make a list. Of every single thing that you excel at. Are you a good artist? Maybe a good basketball player. Or perhaps you are good at an instrument or talent.

Find what you are good at, and what makes you an important person. Build upon that and assure yourself of your talents.

These people are not worth anymore than you are OP.

"All men are born with the same clay, but not shaped by the same mold."

>>17243921
Not OP, but this well applies to me too. Thanks for the advice!

>>17243921
I dont even think its that though. I was in track in my last years of hs and was the second fastest out of my whole team, but I felt insecure during it all. Maybe I felt naked wearing the track suits and there were lots of people watching, or I just felt that no one cared(we would just run, get our time at a stand, and thats it). At least working out keeps my mind active from people.

>>17243955
That's almost textbook inferiority complex.

You feel you're not if the same caliber as other people. Which in turn causes you to feel anxious, and worry that they might think you are crazy, or unnormal.

I recommend you meditate, and build your inner strength. Assure yourself of what a valuable human being you are. Mediation helps a lot of underlying problems. If you find that mediation does not help anything, or that it possibly worsens the situation, I recommend you visit a therapist.