ldr feels
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
Hello I'm a 24-year-old-female anon and I'm in a 2 year LDR with someone who lives on the other side of the USA. (2,000+ mile difference). I just have some bad thoughts I want to write about. Maybe you guys can give a fresh pair of eyes on the situation.
We've never met. I'm a virgin. He's a virgin. I'm the first girlfriend he's had, but, he isn't my first boyfriend. I had 3 in real life ones: they were all during high school. All used me in some way. None loved me. It was all just dumb high school shit. My first boyfriend ever actually raped me (it took me many years to realize it, and after asking many people's opinion, and by that time I had already gotten over it). He made me do oral sex on him and I repeatedly told him no (as I had been saying for several days prior) but he still forced it into my mouth.
So the point is, I've never had a boy love me before. I've never been held gently. I've never been cuddled. I don't get hugged by anyone. Unfortunately I am extremely cuddly, touchy, and affectionate, and having a LDR relationship makes that even more difficult.
So my boyfriend is on a vacation, and even though he's been keeping me updated on all the cool stuff he's doing, I haven't felt farther from him in a long time. Every day I come home, I think, I'm still alone. I have urges to break up. From time to time I think of past crushes and cuddling them. I have a past of trying to "escape" from my boyfriend because I felt so unsatisfied/unhappy. In fact I have even emotionally cheated on my boyfriend: on a few occasions I hung out alone with crushes and I actually got hugged and that was the extent of it. Physically it wasn't cheating but emotionally it was.
It's bad to think like that when everything is practically going excellent in my relationship, but I still feel so alone
tl;dr: don't do online or long-distance relationships kids
>>17239401
https://youtu.be/plnnYKPx0WM
>>17239401
See a psychologist, you sound unhealthy.
>>17239404
>>17239401
Why not talk to him about how alone you feel? LDR here too, and I have freak out mental breakdowns, it takes my girlfriend maybe a day to calm me down but I'll be perfectly fine after that for a month+
>>17239401
>LDR
>never met
>doing a LDR anyway
Nigga you serious? Lmao.
>>17239401
I had an LDR 8 years ago, he lived in NZ and I'm in the Netherlands. We send a teddybear to eachoter so we could "hug" anyway. After a year he left NZ behind him and moved here with me.
Not all LDR are bad, if you talk together it can work out.
>>17239466
Should I tough it out and wait 6 to 12 months till we can live together (for financial reasons)?
Should I cheat on him (get hugs from another man)
As another anon suggested we've talked stuff out many many times, i can try to give it another try but he's busy now. Just don't wanna dump a serious load of feels and thoughts onto him randomly
>>17239503
You should import a large African bull to impregnate you
>>17239401
no such thing as emotionally cheating, u just feel guilty. its ok to like other people. honestly u can break up with him if u want to, u clearly hate him, ur just afraid of being lonely afterwards.
Sounds like you should leave. Long distance isn't for you. Some people can handle it because they don't need the physical intimacy. You are not that. Plus you obviously are unhappy and have admitted to cheating on him. Leave for both of your sakes.
