Concerned Dad
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
Hello /adv/. When my son was 2 his bitch mother (shared opinion) took him half-way across the US and got a restraining order saying that I have to stay 500ft away from her at all times. It was only approved because I had a few assault charges on me when I was 17 for some stupid shit and the police didn't want to take the chance she was telling the truth and that I was beating on her. I wasn't. She recently passed away and my son (16 now) and I have been living together since. From what I understand, he never really made any friends and he was basically a hermit who never left his room from age 10-15. That's why he's fat. He can barely socialize with anyone but me and he can't step outside of our apartment without having these huge fucking panic spikes. I don't want him to be the tendies guy, I want him to live a normal life. I enrolled him at a local high-school and got him a SIN but he was too late for driving lessons this year which he felt really bad about because he wanted to learn to drive so he didn't have to take the bus and be afraid of being mugged/stabbed. DESU he is a pretty easy target because he's weak as shit. He's fat and emaciated all at the same time and he couldn't talk his way out of these situations because he's so fucking socially inept. I know he knows these fears are irrational and I really want to help him be a normal, functioning person. Please help me /adv/, you're my only hope.
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>>17224063
Go to the gym together. Should make him healthier and possibly more social interaction.
>>17224473
Seconding this. Well, shared activity, at least, with chance of social interaction.
Ya, get him to work out also tell or teach him a few ways to talk to people and convince him to not be shy or something lol gl,hope he'll have a nice life.
Talk to him about seeing a psychologist to help him learn how to feel better about himself. As his father you have a lot of other responsibilities too, help him find something he can take pride in, what doesn't matter, just that it's something he feels confident in doing and doing well. And take note of his successes, compliment him for doing well. But be careful to make sure they're sincere compliments. He'll notice if they're undeserved.
Speaking from experience here. My only advice is for him to start lifting. A lot of psychological problems stem from low self-esteem and a good way to start improving your self-esteem is by improving your health and physical appearance.
You'll have to start training with him or hire a professional trainer, at least in the beginning, so you can guide and motivate him along the way.
If you won't be there to coach him, check for proper form, etc. there's a good chance he'll drop it pretty quickly, since going from no physical activity to strenuous exercise is really fucking daunting, especially if you have no idea what you're doing.
Once he gains at least some confidence and starts taking initiative on things the rest (social life, anxiety) will start to fall in place on its own.
>>17224063
for best results, eat the same meals and go to the gym. do exercise together. play wii sports together. do dodgeball together. take him to play lasertag. treat him like a friend in these instances and not a parent.
great bonding. whatever you do, dont act ashamed of him. no matter how bad he is at it or how embraassing it is. dont patronize him. just act like its legitimate fun bonding time. be excited about things and he could be too.
get water guns and shoot at him, toss him one, and run for it. or bb guns. whatever it takes to get him active.
if he eats sugary ucking cereals in the morning, look at the calories, compare to ad ifferent brand and simply replace it. if you can convince him to, switch to simply fruit.
remove carbs wherever possible. consider packing his lunch.
ford inner avoid the take out type stuff. try to avoid pastas, and switch up the formula.
meat is fine and grea,t but it doesnt have to be a main course. make meat a side dish. half a pound AT MAX (400 calories for beef or chicken). then just load up on steamed veggies, green beans, asparagus, corn etc.
really low cal stuff.
if you can switch out an entire meal (like lunch in the summer) to just steamed veggies, you'll do good.
even if its something high cal like an avocado, you will at least know hes getting lots of nutrients with it.
