Preface: This is a weird question and a lot of you are going to ask why I would be considering this in the first place or will simply want to say "No, don't do this, you're an idiot." I totally understand where you're coming from. However, the purpose of this post is to get information on some technical questions: Can you turn yourself in for committing slander (as opposed to someone filing a complaint)? Since the burden of proof is put on the victim, is it possible for me as the aggressor to volunteer that proof even though it would hurt me to do so?
Situation: I heavily criticized a restaurant, saying everything from saying there food was bad to claiming to know they had pest issues. A lot of what I said were exaggerations or flat out lies.
I would tell customers from my work not to go to this restaurant routinely (approximately 2 customers per shift, 5-6 shifts a week, for 8 years). Where I work, it's common for people to ask about restaurants in the area.
Assuming I'm going to do this no matter how stupid I would be to do so: Could I turn myself in to the police, tell them I've committed slander, and offer them evidence and approximate damages? Would they then call the restaurant and ask the owner if he wants to press charges? Alternatively, could I send a letter to the owner of the restaurant and offer to fully comply if he wishes to file a complaint and even maybe pay for his legal fees?
Does anyone have an answer for this question?
The police will tell you to stop wasting their time since slander is a civil matter, not a criminal offense.
Assuming you really want to do this, then the thing to do is to contact the owner directly, tell you what you've done, and ask him how much damage your actions have caused him and then pay him - no need to get a judge or lawyer involved.
I imagine it is possible somehow. Anonymous tipline should work at the very least.
What brings you to this kind of decision btw? Guilt? Attempting to get a criminal record? Is your name Earl?
>>17209859
Thank you. I might give him a letter so that it's in writing and he can do with it as he wishes.
>>17209863
It's a complicated story that I don't care to get on to here though I understand why you'd want to know. It's definitely guilt.
>>17209859
If he did want to take me to court, is it possible to offer to pay for his legal fees? Or is that a conflict of interest thing?
>>17209871
Nuts. I really wanted your name to be Earl.
>>17209896
If you agree that you have caused him damage and are willing to pay the amount of money he claims as damage, then there is no reason for him to take you to court.
The only thing that would do is waste his time and that of the judge and jury.
Look at it from his point of view - some random guy sends him a letter saying that he wants to give him a chunk of money because he feels guilty about some things he said. The restaurant owner is going to say, "Hey free money - better grab it before this nutcase changes his mind!"
>>17209933
What should I include in the letter? In order to create an ideal situation for him, what content does it need to include? Or do I just ask him if he would like to charge me the average cost of a meal times the estimated number of customers I sent away?
>>17209954
Running the numbers, you've talked to about 4,000 people over those 8 years. Let's assume ten dollars each...
Dear Mister Restaurant Owner,
Over the past eight years, I have spoken to approximately four thousand people, telling them lies about your restaurant, falsely claiming that your food was of poor quality and prepared in unsanitary conditions.
I estimate that each one of those conversations has cost you ten dollars ($10) and would like to make amends by paying you forty-thousand dollars ($40,000) in compensation.
I can be contacted at xxx-xxx-xxxx if you would like to discuss this matter further.
Sincerely,
A. Crazy Mann
>>17209982
Thank you for this. I'm going to cut and paste it (changing some of the language of course) and adding language that I'm sorry. This is going to suck.
>>17209982
Fuck. It's sent.
>>17209998
Well, happy to help - do you actually have that kind of money to pay him off like that?
>>17210019
No, I make $33,000 a year. It will have to be paid over time. I'm prepared to get another job over this.
>>17210027
Wow - well, even though I think you are nuts for doing this, I admire your commitment to your own sense of personal integrity.
>>17210053
thank you. I feel instantly regretful or maybe just afraid but I sent the email so it's a done deal.
>>17210053
Man, I just metaphorically laid down at his feet and asked him to wipe his shoes off. fuck
>>17209982
>>17210053
If you were him would you ignore the email, forgive me, or take me up on it? I mean if I look crazy is he likely to just leave it be?
>>17210099
I'd probably assume you were some crazy fuck and ignore it or tell you it's fine and just tell people to come to the restaurant next time.
>>17210099
If it were me and someone wanted to set up a regular stream of payments that I didn't have to do anything in order to get, sure, I'd take the money as long as it kept flowing in.
I'd say, "If you really want to do this, then send me a money order every month until it's paid off"
I wouldn't go chasing it though - if, for example, the guy stopped paying me after a year then I wouldn't bother pursuing it.
>>17210142
>>17210190
Thank you.
>>17209692
No crime has been committed.Slander is telling factua llies about the victim ("He fucks pigs") and only then if it is a lie that others might believe and might thereby cause him measurable harm.
Opinions are not slander, however false or exaggerated they may be. So, for example, a movie review that said "This is the worst movie I've ever seen" is not slander.
If you really feel guilty, post a new review on reviewing sites giving a more balanced opinion.
There is no crime here.
