How can I get a girlfriend (or friend for that matter), if I can't appreciate modern society. The materialism and hedonistic tendencies of the people I interact with truly infuriates me. I'm going to be attending a university with a strong party culture, so I assume its only going to get worse. I'm not suicidal (yet), but sometimes its really hard to interact with people without resorting to materialistic small talk, which I despise.
Obviously the world is not perfect, but how should I deal with the consumerist mass culture of my surroundings?
I've contemplated isolating myself, but even then my condition will only get worse.
Drink until you blunt that edge of yours.
>>17203508
>Obviously the world is not perfect, but how should I deal with the consumerist mass culture of my surroundings?
The only reason you hate modern society is because you don't fit in, so you compensate for your sadness with anger and a superiority complex.
If you perceive modern society as beneath you then you don't have to face the reality that even in a hedonistic and morally bankrupt cultural climate you're not welcome.
Get off of your high horse and join the masses. You can sit in the corner and turn your nose up to life as it passes you by or you can jump into the fray and hope for the best.
You're not above behaving like an animal and having fun. We're all glorified monkeys in clothes so drop the superiority bullshit and do something empty and stupid and exhilarating. Soak it in, because this is all it is, kid.
>>17203545
No OP, don't do that, don't become one of them.
Find a couple of people, who don't like to party and hang out with them.
There are people who don't fit in in every college and you can stick together.
>>17203545
>Soak it in, because this is all it is, kid.
better kill myself then, or join a monastery of some sort
>>17203550
It's not just the party scene, its just that its hard for me to communicate and live with other people, usually due to my life philosophy.
>>17203550
>No OP, don't do that, don't become one of them.
Viewing life as us vs. them is exactly the type of thinking that has curled OP up into this endless loop of judgement and exclusion; viewing people he can't relate with as "the enemy" simply because they enjoy things he doesn't understand.
I didn't tell OP to go party endlessly or hang out with people he doesn't like, I merely suggested that he go into situations with his eyes open instead of immediately judging people.
He is a member of modern society, despite his qualms about it. He isn't above it.
Maybe loosening up and getting to know people outside of his comfort zone might be a better idea than just finding a handful of people just like him and digging his feet deeper into his aggressive ideals.
Surrounding yourself with people who agree and are similar to you is the easy part. Maybe OP would be better off asking himself why people he can't relate with "infuriate" him. That isn't normal. That isn't healthy.
>>17203576
>better kill myself then, or join a monastery of some sort
I guess you better. Your superiority complex will kill all chances of a functional social life. Until you drop it and accept the fact that you aren't better than everyone else you might find yourself connecting in ways you didn't think possible.
I know its hard to let go but maybe someday you'll get sick of looking down on everyone from your ivory tower.
>>17203576
Trust me, people who oppose nowadays materialistic culture do exist.
In colleges too. You haven't even spent a day in your college, dude, not everyone likes parties. You don't know that now.
About three fourths of my college loves parties. But there are a couple of dozens people who love theatres, classical music and traditional trusting hangouts where you talk or play tabletop games with friends.
I was biased too, at first, but there is at least one person in each group who doesn't drink with them or make selfies.
>>17203583
I don't view them as enemies, they are cattle to me. They're happy, which is good for them, but I look at the happy people and realize that they have no purpose in life besides being consumerist pieces of shit. All they look forward to is the next experience to be bought. I don't hate the people, I just don't know how to live in such a society.
>>17203598
Doesn't sound like you have much purpose in life either, bydlobro.
>>17203590
The grass isn't any different on the other side. I know if I hang out with the other people, that I will still have my problems, but merely re-purposed. I guess my biggest issue is whether to conform or be a hermit.
>>17203583
Yeah, the OPs attitude is not healthy, I didn't suggest to go to opposing group, you don't have to oppose party culture to not be a part of it.
Nobody i know in college is so childish to ignore partying just for the sake of it. They mostly have different ways to have fun and are not afraid to be judged for that. Some people like both different ways and partying. Not if anyone judged them, party people aren't childish either.
OP hasn't them vs. us he has me vs. consumerist world.
Maybe finding out that not all people fit in his I-am-a-morally-right-lord model, will help him descend to us, mere mortals.
>>17203600
I don't, but at least I'm aware of that. If that makes a difference?
>>17203606
how will my situation change if I conform? I wouldn't expect much of an intrinsic change.
>>17203604
If even finding people who don't support materialism won't help you, then yeah, your problem is narcissism and you should get down.
I kind of had that too in freshman years, but I learned from people who are better than me, who were nice to me and other people, to have broader views.
Many great people i know love partying, but i'm still biased towards some categories of people, need to progress, yeah.
>>17203610
No, it doesn't. You're just one more angry outsider.
Hang in there. Make sure you socialise in the first few weeks of Uni; most of the people will be infuriating but if you stick with it and talk to the others who look as alienated as you feel, you'll find some people to get along with.
Try not to rant about materialistic hedonism or mass consumer culture though, it's a bit passé.
>>17203616
>your problem is narcissism
I'm pretty sure its not that. Its just that when I express my own beliefs or ideas, people reprimand them. I believe that their reactions are largely formed due to their exposure to popular culture. There are few people that accept me/are neutral to me, but the overwhelming majority is hostile to what I say or believe.
>>17203615
Look, Op, if a girl, for example, smiles to you, actually listens to you, treats you real good for no reason it all, you'll realize fucking awesome it feels.
I remember having the same thoughts for a long time. You have to become vulnerable, feel how good acceptance feels, and that is more often then not worth it, to be imperfect mere human.
Not necesaarily a party goer, you can do anything, which doesn't classify you as an entitled vain fucker.
>>17203625
>the overwhelming majority is hostile
The overwhelming majority disagree with each other, too. You're not special, you just think you are because you're narcissistic.
>>17203628
I see what you mean, but the biggest issue is that if I don't censor my conversations they either think
1. I'm joking
or 2. I'm a tin foil hat-wearing skeptic.
I don't want to be either, but cannot survive being censored for the rest of my life.
>>17203629
I'm too selfless to be a narcissist. I wouldn't ask for advice from strangers if I thought I was the shit.
>>17203635
>I'm too selfless to be a narcissist
ahahahah fuck me.
>>17203625
>I don't want to communicate, because i'm afraid to be judged and rejected
See, you said it yourself.
And don't tell me you aren't afraid, you extrapolate your negative experience endlessly to the future.
That is it, op. You don't get accepted, so you harshly deny wanting to be. You distance yourself from others and feel lonely. Although you try to seem invincible and better than everyone, at least in your own head. You have to feed on your false feeling of superiority to escape misery, to ensure yourself that it's totally okay that people don't accept you.
Just be vulnerable, tell a good friend some awkward secret, share an insecurity, you'll feel how imperfect you are and still are accepted. It is a cure.
>>17203633
Your believs on that matter aren't that fucking important to direct your life, idiot.
Being an anti-materialist doesn't define you. Discover yourself more, you are not just that.
>>17203647
Thanks anon, I'll think about it, but it seems that the Himalayas are particularly nice this time of the year.
>>17203652
>you are not just that.
no shit sherlock, its just the most polarizing characteristic of mine. There are other elements of it that don't help, but its the largest factor for my isolation.
>>17203659
I am 100% sure that people who truly oppose consumerism and belief other things you mentioned, won't agree with you, because you're narcissistic asshole, who stains the reputation of being anti-consumerist.
What happens if you finally find a person who shares your ideals? You'll still find a petty reason to alienate from him, because your isolation isn't about being a misunderstood minority, just about being a fucktard who is too good for this world.
>>17203666
what do you recommend me to do? become an hero? go to a psych ward? both? become a sideshow act?
>>17203666
To sum it up you locked yourself in a cage, blame everyone else that they don't open it, still hoping that someone has a key, but no key but one fits a keyhole, and that key is inside your heart.
The cage opens only from outside and you have to give the key to a person outside the cage, but you are afraid that he won't, and leaves you locked forever.
The truth is, you have much more than one key, and you can always try again, though it hurts to open your heart to people and be rejected.
>>17203677
>though it hurts to open your heart to people and be rejected.
I guess its that right there
>>17203670
I already told you to admit that you aren't better than other people. Embrace your flaws, accept that they are part of who you are.
You may simply write them here. Strictly in a non-selfdefeating manner.
>>17203685
Everyone goes through it when maturing, and op's so-hated party people are better at coping with rejection than s/he is.
It can't be op writing.
Ok, so,
You are not special, everyone experiences it, and you should get over yourself. Dipping a toe in those scary waters and going slowly helps. First admitting something small and unimportant, then larger.
>>17203686
>Embrace your flaws, accept that they are part of who you are.
>You may simply write them here. Strictly in a non-selfdefeating manner.
Alright, here we go:
I will die.
I am a kissless virgin.
I am not perfect and I never will be.
Nobody cares what I think.
I am replaceable, and so is the rest of the human species.
My beliefs are not perfect and are probably all wrong.
My sense of humor is unique to myself and not desirable to other people.
I'm condescending.
I'm not as strong as I would like to be.
That's a few right there. I'm not being facetious btw/
>>17203703
You wrote it in a self-defeating manner, dumbass. It means that you want to be comforted too fucking bad.
And all of it is you comparing yourself to an ideal being and substracting one from another.
Your ideal is unreachable, everyone has strong sides and weak, like in an rpg game.
So, list your strong sides objectively.
And weak too.
What you actually can or can't don't compare it to your enormous wishlist.
>>17203721
thanks for the help anon, I'll try my best to humanize my ego-ideal.
