//// What can I say to best show deep appreciation to my father figure / mentor?
I want to write a very nice letter for him near father's day. Looking for things that will mean a lot to him and make him feel good.
Thanks
Just say you care for him and thank him for making you who you are today. It doesn't have to be perfect to be heartfelt. It is coming from you, that should mean a lot to him.
>>17202305
Thanks, I appreciate the reply. I like the first sentence a lot.
I want to capture how I feel well and make sure he feels loved, in a way that makes sense for a father figure -- adult son relationship.
I wouldn't want to be told.
>>17202298
hey man i think we talked before. not for awhile. a few months back you were asking a similar question but without the fathers day thing.
hes your boss right? i remember we bonded over our mutual appreciation for mentor boss'.
>>17202639
Yes! He's not my direct boss, but yeah.
Good to talk to you again, haha. Clearly I'm still deeply appreciative and have a lot of the same questions about expression affection. I've done it more since then, and it's been great.
>>17202692
enjoy it while you can man. its pretty rad.
im actually going on a business trip with him to new hampshire on tuesday. I go about once a year.
>>17202305
You gay bro?
I'd give him a nice long ball.licking and cock sucking
>>17202705
Nice. What do you do to show appreciation // how do you keep him engaged, again?
>>17202721
keep him engaged? im not sure what you mean.
as for show appreciation, recently he helped me out wiht a BIG thing so im trying to get him a gift card. i tried to get one to his favorite cupcake shop but they are a small thing so dont have em. im considering getting him a KFC card cuz he loves it there but thats a lot less fancy.
>>17202738
I mean like keep him interested in mentoring/guiding you, I guess
That sounds good. It's an interesting balance between being too over the top and being honest in how much appreciation you feel
>>17202742
oh there's no smokescreen about him being my mentor. he knows it, i know it, all of our clients know it. we see each other more than we see anyone else, hes leaving me in charge of his non profit organization, etc. etc.
it just kinda developed naturally since I am his sole employee.
does it feel like you're struggling to establish that? is yours more of a JD and doctor Cox sorta bit where he does do the mentor shtick but doesn't appear to invest in it?
>>17202748
No no it's super clear he's my mentor, we're very close and everyone knows it. We have a pretty notable amazing relationship
It's more that I love what I have so much that I'm concerned I'll lose it I guess
Aka overthinking it
>>17202751
like vision said "something isn't beautiful because it lasts'.
you can't really be 40 years old and still have a mentor. but at some point after you've learned what you can from him, what you can from life, and perhaps from other people, you'll go on to mentor someone else as well.
showcased pretty well in buffy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YKg6016rTQ
there comes a point where a mentor only holds you back.
so enjoy it while it lasts for however long it lasts. if yo u need him in any capacity and he can be there, then he will continue to be there. if he is the kind of person who stops investing simply because he gets bored, then hes not worth having as a mentor.
learned that one the hard way.
>>17202758
Thanks man
>if he is the kind of person who stops investing simply because he gets bored, then hes not worth having as a mentor. learned that the hard way
Tell me about his
>>17202769
most mentor relationships develop naturally. some don't. in some cases everyone is well aware whats happening before you go into it, and those people often do it for the wrong reasons. i wanted a mentor, like i would state it the way an anon might say 'i want a gf'. i think what i was looking for was a cheat code, a way to pass off blame.
and what i got was a couple of assholes who wanted to act like they were mentors but neverreally helped in any constructive way. at best id get a pat on the head, which doesn't help, and even then that was lucky.
but in this case i just went into work wanting to work a job and make money. i was a skeptic at first (cuz although i enjoy the paranormal im skeptic of anyone claiming to be a legit psychic and whatnot) but overtime just the more he told me the more made sense. hes not 100% right all the time, and thats part of the whole mentoring thing is knowing what advice to take, and what advice to reverse engineer, and in some cases (when they are wrong) knowing WHY they are wrong, and what possibly went wrong in their lives to make them think they were right.
>>17202789
Got it. Very cool, it's nice to hear about your experience
I had never really had a mentor / role model / positive male figure before this, and I didn't really even know to look for it. Which is probably why I feel so mind blown and eager to express appreciation for it now
>>17202796
I get it. i think a simple card, and maybe a meaningful gift card, will do all the work for you.
i mean it is fathers day, hes gonna get it.
and trust me i get it. the weirdest part is comparing him to my dad. my dad absolutely hates him hates that i work for him etc. wont talk abotu him at all. if i bring anything from work up (like how im being set up on the non profit) he just says 'thats nice' and changes the subject.
I love my dad and there are interesting ways we bond, but i look back and feel like my dad was never a mentor to me. he was very much a 'do this or else' in every single aspect of my life. looking back a lot of it is weird.
versus my boss who still tells me stuff i dont want to hear, but also encourages me and helps me in many ways.
>>17202819
Got it. I'm sure he'll know too (and probably already does).
Why does your dad hate him? Just jealousy? Does he resent that you have a different father figure?
>>17202841
i dont think my father even knows how close we are simply because he doesn't want to know anyhting about it.
basically my boss is a psychic as i mentioned, i manage his business for him. my father sees him as a scam artist and therefore im no longer worthy of his interest.
it is unfortunate. if i worked for starbucks he wouldnt be whining about how coffee is picked by slaves, or if i worked for wal mart how everyhting there is made by slaves, or if i worked for apple hwo the phones are made by child slaves who hate their lives so much they had to put nets out the window to stop them from killing them.
but a psychic? one step too far.
so i brush it off. he has of course never bothered talking to me abotu this, he just immediately decided to ice me out and tell my mom.
i visisted my aunt and uncle last week. he drove down to see me. the entire time, the entire fucking weekend he only asked me two questions
>whats wrong with your hair
>whats wrong with your eye
decided i was done right there.
>>17202855
What was up with your hair/eye? Haha
Got it. That's rough man. It's hard missing that bond with your dad, but I'm glad you got it elsewhere
>>17202880
i never really had it growing up, so i never really understood it.
looking back it makes things make sense. i had an odd fascination with Harry Pottter meeting sirius black. something about it made me feel comforted. i think part of that was that my dad was stationed overseas that year (by choice).
its something i didnt pick up on but i guess the desire was definitely there. definitely glad i have my boss.
>what was up with your hair/eye
my nephew thinks i have cool hair, nad he just wanted to style it. so he got some hair gel and gave me liberty spikes (hes 7) and i just left it that way cuz everytime id fix it hed climb on my back and mess it back up again.
as for my eye, i had a stye, which is like an infection from when an eyelash falls off. it happens a lot when i travel to be honest.
>>17202889
Awesome awesome. Do you know what you'll write in your card for your boss?
>>17202897
>thanks for the exorcism
wish i was joking but thats about it. the card is mostly from my mom.
>>17202903
Haha that's awesome
>>17202905
shes a big fan of his and was very grateful he was able to fix me (though in my defense if i wasnt working for him i wouldnt have gotten the problem in the first place)
>>17202909
So less of a "thanks for your huge impact" and more thanks for a specific action
Since we've come this far... What did he help you through that you developed because of him?
>>17202943
thats the current one, but ive actually been working on a plan to give him a bigger present just to show him i care. he pinches a few pennies later in the year to give me a big christmas bonus, and im trying to do the same through the business by taking out an extra hundred each month so that by the time december gets here he'll have an extra grand that ive written off as expenses to spend on whatever he wants. christmas also happens to be his birthday.
as far as the recent event, i had literally developed brain damage. it persisted for a month, and i was very grateful he was my boss at the time. he let me run the business on auto pilot (Thankfully we had such a good month that htere wasnt much to do other than take calls) until i got better. he drove me to doctors appointments, often drove me home (it was hard for me to walk) and some days just came in and talked me through the scariness of what was happening.
then he performed an exorcism on me and 4 hours later i was fine again.
>>17202943
maybe you sould tell me about your mentor.
>>17202957
Nice, that's a good plan. I have a good gift in mind (it's small/creative/personal and he'll appreciate it a lot), I just now need to figure out what to write to go with it in a letter. I think he'll feel love just from the gift, but I want to capture it well
He's super open with me -- I ask him about everything. Like, all of it -- work, sex, his views on the world. I've gained a lot from our talks about his struggles and his triumphs. We're very similar, so talking to him often feels like a lesson in me that I didn't quite expect. He's charming, he's funny, he's full of life
I wish I could straight up say "do you see me as a son?" to him. He treats me like one, but I'd like the validation of him saying it.
>>17202993
id wait on that one. don't have to ask. im sure it will come out at some point.
i had a similar situation recently. he hasnt explicitly stated it yet, but in the way he treats me, i know he does, and as more of the 'heir' to everything in the philosophical sense. so i guess i never really felt like i wanted to hear him say it.
i can tell you're eager and kinda want to cement that, but just give him the card, and id say keep it simple. if you think about it he might appreciate it put in simple words more than in the complex form.
its unfortunate there is no 'sons day' to have him return the favor but maybe at a birthday he might say something more than JUST happy birthday. its hard to say.
give it time and wiat it out ill say. the relationships still there thankfully so you dont have to worry about it collapsing based on him saying or not saying that.
id like to note that i find it really interesting that ew end up meeting up in this thread every few months.
>>17203006
Yeah, I know I could never outright ask it as much as I want him to say it. I wonder if he wishes I would outright say I see him as a father, lol.
Thanks man. I'm going to bed -- I really appreciate the back and forth with you. It's awesome to talk about this, especially since it feels so often lost in translation. If you think of anything more, let me know.
>>17203016
:)
Always helpful
>>17203020
>>17203024
just give him the gift, give him the fathers day card, and keep it really simple. i have a feeling he appreciates simplicity and will just be happy you gave him a card let alone a gift.
he might want you to say it, its hard to say. i dont know your relationship. but htanks to the card you dont have to.
>>17203030
Got it. Again, thank you so much. Night
>>17203043
no problem man im (apparently) always here if you need a tune up. maybe in the next thread you'll tell me how it goes.
night man.
No guy wants a card... It'll make things weird
It's better for stuff like this to go unsaid. Telling him you appreciate him will make him pull away from you.
Just fuck him
>>17205499
It's the other way around... Looks like you're going nowhere in life...
>>17205515
The father/mentor fucks the son/protege?
Good to know
>>17202298
call him daddy when you're being penetrated
>>17205559
"Papi" is better when he cums inside you
>>17205751
yell out "i'm your baby boy" as he fucks you
Is there ever any good way to show someone they're your father figure?
>>17206964
I would say anyone saying "you're my father figure" will be instantly creepy
Affection is better unsaid for real men
>>17202298
Firm handshake and a pat on the back. A thank you maybe.
Actions speak louder than words.
>>17208523
I have never figured out how to pat someone on the back naturally.
Men don't see other men as sons. No one wants to pretend to be a father.
