Hi adv,
I am on the verge of breaking up with my girlfriend, I have just had enough.
After her leaving college she made no attempt to get a job for 3 months, so I forced her to interview for a position at my work after asking her for months, she asked to move in with me and I agreed and started the job. While living with me she made NO attempt at helping to pay for anything or to do chores, after 2 months she was lay-off from work. After being lay-off she hasn't attempted to get a job again or apply anywhere, when I got home from work she would be just getting out of bed or would be watching internet videos or playing games, it made me insane how lazy she is being.
The next thing is the sex, and flirting it's just terrible. She puts no effort in. I have to tell her what to do, make all the moves all the time, even to just kiss. It's like she is a robot and there is no "spark" or spontaneousness, she gets offended if I ask to send nudes or will just ignore flirty messages rather than flirt back.
A few months later, I have now lost my job and couldn't afford to pay rent. So she went back home and asked her parents if I could stay until I could find a new job and they said "no", it infuriates me as all I have done is help them and pay for their daughter under my roof for the past year, so it would have been nice to support me for a month to get back onto my feet, rather than moving far away to my parents.
I recently found a new job, after a month of no work which will mean me moving far away. She want's to move in with me again...
I hate the thought of being alone and its the only reason I keep going, with the possibility that she might change and mature.
Just break it off. Think about how amazing it'll be with a better girlfriend in the future.
It'll hurt for a little while, but you'll be fine in a few weeks.
Shes either depressed or just a neet. If you don't like the thought of being in a relationship with someone like that get out NOW before shit goes any further.
>>17199674
>I am on the verge of breaking up with my girlfriend, I have just had enough.
Leave her. But I'll finish reading your post, promise.
If she is older than about 20, she will never change. Being alone is better than carrying a dead weight. You are fundamentally incompatible because you obviously want totally different things out of your lives and, despite it being a sad thing, it's time for you to break up with her. You should be in a relationship with someone who inspires you and challenges you and someone you can be proud of, not a lazy workshy prude.
>>17199674
It doesn't really sound like it's working. She doesn't have the dame work ethic as you, the same goals that she's willing to work towards, you state there's no spark...
Honestly having her move in again would just lead to the same problems and it sounds like it's really easy for her to fall into the same pattern.
Tell her it's time to get serious about working or she needs to move back home with her parents. I hear a lot of my friends moving girls in when they can't afford to, the woman gets comfortable and lazy, the man gets resentful... you end up going paycheck to paycheck and when the relationship blew up in their face they didn't have a penny to their name or any savings because they were feeding and housing someone who was never willing to bring home any money.
Save yourself the discomfort and ask her to move home, then having some time apart decide if this relationship is worth being the only one who puts in any effort.
Bet anything once you two do split she'll get her ass in gear an actually get a job. Circle of life man.
>>17199674
So, you seem cool besides the part where you say you ask for nudes and she doesn't send them as a negative. But that's just one mental fuckup among the sea of fuckup you're surrounded by. Dunno why you're still together. Are you ugly? Do you have weird hobbies? Don't worry, you will get a new girl e-a-s-y now that everyone is trying to act less shallow for some reason. That's not something to worry about. But clearly you're capable of getting shitdeep in shit and then ask why is it stinky. In the future pay attention to red flags, if the same flag appears 2 or different flags appear within 1 month, dump without thinking.
Dump her ... she is a lifesucker ... you will eventually get another one who will appreciate you.
>>17199686
I think it's a mixture of both.
>>17199693
Yes over 20, and has alot of confidence issues.
>>17199698
I told her if she wants to move in she needs to sort it out and get a job, while I am having time off till I start my new job I suggested we Skype together and she can do some work... but so far she's been getting up late.
>>17199710
When someone won't come visit you, and you can no longer afford to pay for her to visit, how else can you share love when there is distance? I have no issue with not doing nudes, just would be nice to attempt to flirt in some way so it was a suggestion. That's why I think of it as a negative. I wouldn't call myself ugly, just my biggest flaw is I am small in height so it's hard to find a girl, I don't really have any weird hobbies apart from gaming.
>>17199674
Talk to her seriously, tell her she needs a job because you can't stand this situation anymore. If she doesn't make any effort just break up with her
>>17199766
>how else can you share love besides receiving nudes?
Ok, clearly you both suck and humaning, so doesn't matter if you stay together or split.
>>17199773
Not actually what he said at all. I think you can probs forgive the guy for trying to maintain a intimate/sexual relationship at long distance as well as an emotional one...
>>17199674
Have you talked to her about this?
>>17199773
I completely agree with you about nudes and that line in particular was stupid as fuck, but I think you're overanalyzing this anon. He doesn't seem hooked up on nudes in particular, just wants her to show any interest at all.
>>17199779
Yup, OP is the one trying and showing initiative, but if you're going to be butthurt about your gf not being into the same stuff as you are, you got to take a second look at yourself.
You sound miserable , op. You've clearly put much thought into this. You know she won't change and you will just be miserable again. If you really need to, just use the move as an excuse to break up.
>>17199674
You have mentioned stuff that sucks about her, how hard working you are, how mistreated you are. You are clearly aware of the situation. Take action. Don't curl up in the lap of anons for some ego stroking session.
>>17199784
>>17199768
Yes spoken about it, numerous times. Still hasn't changed her habit or the outlook at all.
>>17199794
Was just trying to get her to do new things, and be romantic. Not like I was GIVE ME NUDES OR WE BREAK UP OMG, I understood she wasn't confident with it and left it as that.
>>17199779
>>17199805
>>17199813
Thanks anon.
>>17199674
wake up the fuck up idiot women are not the same anymore stop being afraid of being alone. women noways want be treated like the last vagina on earth and for her moving in was like a vacation. Women don't want to cook,clean, or do anything around the house and if you call them our on it they will call you sexist. OP you are a fucking pussy for letting your girlfriend treat you like that.
>>17199674
OP, don't make the same mistake again. If she gets snippy and asks why she can't move back in tell her what you told us.
>lazy
>not sexy enough, boring
>not interesting
Seems like a few good reasons to not want to live with someone. What exactly attracted you to her in the first place?
