idk what tto do, I'm always mad at my boyfriend. like everything he does makes me upset ..
last night, we went out with his friend and his friends gf. I'm really shy with people I don't know so I don't talk a lot but I smile/laugh/talk sometimes. I just don't socialize a lot which is something I'm ready to work on (normally I wouldn't had even of gone, but I wanna start living).
anyway, we went to a second bar after and my bf like knew at least ten people there. he was chatting with them all and didn't introduce me to anyone, even when the guys he were chatting with were introducing their gfs. he said he didn't rely care about them and wee were sitting on opposite sides of a table which is why he didn't introduce me. I was like mad the whole night and I was kinda tipsy and not thinking rationally about how to make the situTikn better I was just angry,and plus these girls were staring at us and it was weir ding me out.
he went to go pay the tab and left our table, and so did his friends gf, and then she came back and my bf didn't come back. his friend and his friends gf left the table, so I was left sitting at a table by myself. I was about to text someone and ask them to pick me up, but I went to go find my bf thinking he was at the bar paying the tab and he was out socializing with everyon. he saw me walking by myself and looked like a deer in highlights like he felt like shit probably. then I followed his friend and his friends gf awkwardly to his car while he was stil there chatting with everyone.
I got pissed after we dropped his friends off and he said we should break up. and I was like ok. then I said I don't want to break up and he took it back.
idk waht to do. am I wrong for being mad? I know I could have made the situation better somehow, but I felt left in the dust.and I'm always mad at him go stuff like this... is it me or him? what should I do?
>>17196809
help I really advice
>>17196809
You know, you CAN talk to people without your boyfriend having to carry you around, right?
>>17196809
>I'm always mad at my boyfriend. like everything he does makes me upset ..
I didn't even read the rest of your post.
If you're always made at your boyfriend and everything he does makes you upset you should break up. End of story.
>>17196832
yeah. like I said I know I could have made the situation a lot better Myself but I let my emotions take over. like I'm just not sure if he's me who overreacts and stuff or if he just treats me badly
>>17196835
well I'm not sure if it's because of me and if I overreact. if it is then j wanna work on that so I'm not always mad over nothing
He doesn't sound all that interested in you. Let me guess, you have no friends of your own and he's your only source of social interaction?
>>17196809
I just got to say you're really cute
>>17196809
>and he said we should break up. and I was like ok. then I said I don't want to break up and he took it back.
Woah what kinda relationship is this even
>>17196868
One where they're apparently 12.
>>17196809
>I'm always mad at my boyfriend. like everything he does makes me upset
You have nothing to worry about. It's called being a bitch and is completely normal for women.
>>17196853
yeah I hVe like one friend. and what do you mean he's not interested in me? :/ why?:/ we've been together for a year
>>17196868
what do u mean? like we were in the car and I was so mad at him and he didn't know want to do and said I think we should break up because he feels like he makes me so unhappy. and idk if he wants to break up with me I'm not the person to beg someone not to so I just said I understand and stuff and then I was like I don't really wanna break up with you. and he said he doesn't either and he was glad I said that and he said he probably would have apolgiEd and stuff later on
>>17196875
>is a social dead weight
>wonders why boyfriend ditches her in social situations
I was going to ask why you're with him, but I think asking why he's with you is a better question.
>>17196875
honestly idk like part of me just thinks it's me that I'm a bitch and socially awkward. another part of me thinks maybe I subconsciously don't like him so I find reasons to be mad at him. another part of me thinks maybe he just treats me badly and that's why I'm always mad. idk what it is
I don't think he loves you otherwise he would have taken good care of you.
>>17196880
>yeah I hVe like one friend. and what do you mean he's not interested in me? :/ why?:/ we've been together for a year
Well he's more interested in socialising with his friends. You're like when your mother makes you take your kid sibling along when you hang out with your friends. If you want to work on your social skills, going out with him is not the way to do it.
>>17196892
that's like really mean. :/ I'm realy bad at socializing but I'm going to try harder and I'm sure in time I'll be a lot better. like you don't really know me or my life or my situation so that's a really mean thing to say, just bc I'm not the best at socializing doesn't mean I deserve nothing in. this world and I'm an uninteresting, bad person who isn't good enough to have a boyfriend.
>>my boyfriend
>>He said we should break up.
It's over. You don't just take breaking up back. He doesn't give a shit about you, go find someone who does.
>>17196898
yeah that's kinda true. that's why I was mad. I even told him like the first time we went to a bar when we first we're seeing each other, he didn't care to talk to anyone there besides me and he made sure I was okay and everything, and now he cared more about alll those people and not me. an she said he didn't even like them which is why he didn't think it was a big deal to introduce me, so I don't get why he'd spend time talking to them if he doesn't like them. and yeah I kinda agree, I wanna socialize more and get better at it but I don't think he will be able to help me
>>17196909
ehhh that's something can be said in anger or in frustration. Like "What the fuck do you want me to do about it then?" kinda thing.
You never take shit said in an argument seriously.
>>17196909
why??? like if it was really over he would have dropped me off and said it was over. I think I was realy mad and he didn't know what to do and he knew that if he said that it would turn things around and I would be forgiving and apologetic and stop being mad at him
>>17196901
This is 4chan, get over it. If you wanted nice, you should have gone somewhere else.
>>17196909
also I didn't beg for him to take me back or anytning I waited a couple minutes and said I didn't realy wanna brak up with you and he turned around and said he doesn't want to either. and later he told me (he's always told me) that he wants to marry me someday and stuff.
>>17196917
I honestly only understood of what you just said. He clearly doesn't want to be with you. Why do you want to be with him?
>>17196927
well whatever. I don't realy care but just because it's an anonymous board if yo want to be a horrible person go ahead but just lnow that you're ugly inside. just because it's an anonymous board doesn't mean I'm going to be awful to people. I have nothing else to say to you.
>>17196930
If you get married, you're either going to break up in two years, or you'll last forever but it'll be the most unhappy one ever
>>17196931
why does he clearly not want to be with me? if he didn't want to be with me wouldn't he break up with me? not take me out with them and buy me drinks? tell me that he wants to marry me eventually? like why would he be with me if he doesn't want to. I don't think that's true.
>>17196938
Oh my god, how does he stand you?
>>17196917
I had a GF like you that never fucking talked to anyone out in events. She just sat there doing fucking nothing the entire time. I would try my hardest to get her to say something, anything but she just sat there like a tard.
After wards she would get all angry and bitchy at me like it was my fault. It got to the point I stopped asking her to come with me to company events(literally the only time I socialized. I'm anti-social as fuck) and then she would get angry at me for not asking her to go. It was like "Bitch, you sit there and do nothing the entire time like you're absolutely miserable. What the fuck do you want me to do?"
Just the most frustrating shit in the world. She put forth literally no effort and expected me to entertain her constantly.
>>17196941
why would it be happy? like i plan on working on my social skills and he told me he will work on acting more like he's in a relationship he even said he acted like he would if I wasn't there and he felt guilty and said he felt like a bad boyfriend and he wants to work on it. and I wanna work on myself too. relationships take work it's not just like two ppl click and live happily ever after there's always ups and downs, bad times and good times. that's how relationships are and I think we're strong enough to get through all this
>>17196949
yeah I guess. but like I said I realy wanna work on it however I know it's not soemthing I can do over night or even in a few weeks it's going to take months of trying until I'm comfortable enough. like months of effort. I don't wanna be like that trust me..
>>17196949
If this were Facebook, I'd like your post.
>>17196954
He doesn't have to wait for you to catch up, and if he's going to have the patience of a saint and stay with you while you do catch up, you can't fucking get mad at him for something that is 100% your fault.
>>17196847
>well I'm not sure if it's because of me and if I overreact. if it is then j wanna work on that so I'm not always mad over nothing
even if it is just you, break up anyway to spare him the aggravation of having a gf who's always pissed at him. then when you have your issues sorted, start over with someone else.
>>17196973
okay that's fine wth. the whole point of this thread was because I was angry at him, and I don't know if I had a right to be angry at him or if it was just my fault. i honestly think it's both our faults. and I think it's fine that I'm working on fighting social anxiety. I'm not a bad person. my bf still loves me because he knows I'm a good person just bc I'm not the best at socializing doesn't mean I'm a useless human being. and I'm goi g to work on it if he doesn't want to wait for me to catch up I understand that and he can leave me but I'm doing the best I can, ive been through a lot in my life and I don't choose to be socially awkward. the fact that I acknowledge this and am trying means a lot that most people don't even do.
>>17196987
well I love him I don't wanna start over with someone else. if we get through this we will have a really strong relationship. not eveeyrnifn is always rainbows and sunshine
>>17196809
>>17196809
Sounds like the problem could be you, or both of you.
He probably disregards you a lot more now than the beginning of the relationship because to me, you come off as a jealous type.
>>17197003
true I think it's both our faults
and yeah:/ I am kinda the jealous type:/ okay so I do have a LOT to work on. I mean I hope he still wants to be with me and we can get through this, if he doesn't that's fine but I love him and I want to be with him and I have faith in us
>>17196809
>>17196809
>>17196809
Just break up, trust me.
That's not cool of him, and you sound like a bitch anyway. Look towards self-improvement then try again.
honestly the fact that I even went out with them is a huge step for me. I'm fightinf social anxiety and I'm obviously going to experience really bad things but that's how you learn and become the person you want to be. like its gonna be hard but I'm going to conquer myself
>>17197020
idk I'm not braking up with him. I am looking towards self imrovement and seeing what happens from there. I'm not ready to break up with him and I don't want to. I think when I move into the city things will be a lot differnt and I'll make friends and be a lot more social and stuff. I live in a small dead end town right now and I feel like my life is on hold. but yeah I'm self improving and focusing on myself he can leave me if he wants but I'm not ready to leave him and I don't want to.
>>17196809
I'm going to be completely straight with you, and try to be as least biased as I can. I'm going to guess you're on the younger side, because a lot of girls feel irrationally angry towards their boyfriends when they are 25 and under - I can't explain to you why, because there are a myriad of possible reasons. Just know that you're not alone in feeling that way, it gets the best of us.
That aside, if your boyfriend really didn't care about you - not even a little - then he wouldn't invite you to these social situations with his friends. Anyone can sit around and mindlessly watch tv with their s/o, he's purposefully bringing you out with his friends - so you're not some shameful secret to him.
Yes - your boyfriend screwed up by not introducing you to people. He must know you're socially awkward, and therefore should have taken care of you a bit more so you didn't feel like a 'deer caught in the headlights'. However, you can't hang off of him - that only puts him in an awkward position.
You are out in a social situation, this is the best way to overcome your anxieties! He should set up the base for you by introducing you to whoever so that you can situate yourself, and then you should go off and do your own thing. Talk to random people, forget about your boyfriend for a few hours - focus on the possibility of meeting some cool new people due to being thrown into these situations. If you end up feeling so uncomfortable, or get rejected so horribly (though this will be a very rare case - not everyone in the world is a bag of dicks) then tell your bf to drive you home so you can recharge, and try again next time.
Enjoy the opportunity that has landed in your lap. You have an 'in' to social situations now, you can just meet people face to face which is a great way of helping to overcome that social anxiety. In the meantime, work on yourself and try meeting and talking to other people interested in what you are. Your life does not revolve around your bf.
>>17197017
I stopped caring about most things.
Now all I do is work and spend my money on myself, almost 90% of the time.
I haven't bought my significant others a gift since I was 19, now I'm 23.
Before I used to care a lot, way too much.
Now I only care a lot when it matters, otherwise you're out the door.
Read this.
http://markmanson.net/not-giving-a-fuck
Everything clicked after I got into reading Mark Manson's articles and his book.
>>17197052
thanks out of all these mean posts your post realy helped and inspired me. like it was really bad night but honestly it was bound to happen and I can learn from it and that's what needs to happen. like I need stuff like this so I can learn from it and grow as a person. If I was sitting at home yes none of this would have happened but I would still be the same awkward person just safe at home. I need to do stuff like this and take hold of my life. maybe I'll make things really awkward again maybe idkk but I'm going to try and that's the most important thing. and ur right I shouldn't cling on to my bf in every social thing like he's my parent or something. I'm my own person and need to socialize on my own make my own friends and be independent and ok on my own. I'm honesty grateful for things like this because they make me grow
By the way you're typing, if I was your bf, I wouldn't introduce you to people either. It's like you lack intelligence. If you're having sex, I'm 99% sure he's only around because of it.
>>17197377
Pussy be dank
>>17197377
okay troll
>>17196864
nice try buddy
>>17197491
Dudes not trolling. You replied to one comment three times earlier. You're not really all there.
Paragraphs bitch!
>>17197555
because I thought more things and I'm typing on my phone. you don't know me so you're a lot more dumb to say you know insofar that my boyfriend is using me for sex and I lack intelligence. that's something someone who actually lacks intelligence would say. so jokes on you.
>replying more than once means ur not all there and ur bf is using u for sex
I think he dont understand you .i mean i have reales with others foros like you and if you love she you just shut up and wait after a bit time you talk with she about it.you dont only say"we should break up"
Next time your boyfriend forgets to introduce you, instead of ruining the night fuming you should do something to fix it asap. No reason to sit and stew. Your boyfriends not a mind reader, you have to tell him when something bothers you, or else it bottles up into a fight.
Either a) gently remind him in a whisper or txt
Or if you really want to get better at social stuff...
b) Introduce yourself, or make a small joke, like "Oh I'd say hi but I don't know anyone's names yet!"
Why do you type like you're 12 years old?
Op do yourself a favor and end the relationship
>>17198067
You answered your own question anon
>>17197569
You're literally an idiot tho
>>17197569
>I know you are but what am I?
Literally an elementary school level response. You're definitely a few fries short of a happy meal.
>>17197569
>you don't know me
We know you aren't intelligent based of you're idiotic posts and way of typing.
I just want to say that after reading your posts and seeing all your illogical decisions and spelling mistakes that you're stupid fucking dumb bitch and I hope he continues using you as a cumdumpster while he has sex with other girls behind your back, like he has already been doing.
>>17196809
It's time to kill yourself
>>17196875
kek
>>17196895
>part of me just thinks it's me that I'm a bitch and socially awkward
It's that one, now fuck off you retard
Hi,
Sounds a lot like you have some underlying issues with him, mabye some hidden anger or frustration you are suppressing? Perhaps you should sit down and have some better communication with him.
I'd like to ask you this:
What would you tell your friend or family member in this situation?
I used to be a social outcast as well. Do you know what I did?
I started listening to that silent voice in my head that whispered funny jokes to me. I let the dark thoughts take hold, and spewed them out as ice breakers. Whatever was on my mind. Now I'm apparently the coolest mother fucker around.
>>17196809
the problem isn't anger. You clearly have anxiety and you for some reason immediately blame your boyfriend for putting you in a "scary" position. Work on your anxiety OP. I have a friend with a gf like you and trust me it is really fucking irritating and noticeable if you regularly get angry at him for stupid god damn reasons.
You're supposed to love this man aren't you? You need to learn to not act immediately on your emotions. Practice acting nice to him even though you're angry, and you will probably be surprised by how quickly the anger fades because it was insignificant in the first place.
GFs like you can be such god damn annoying buzz kills.
