Cheating?
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
Should you cheat? Why would you cheat?
> inb4 22
> inb4 never cheated
> inb4 having gf that have cheated me first year
I can cheat on my gf any time I want to, only reason is I do love her, not that I don't. I've given everything I could give her. Even doing surprises she knows how to ruin them.
She is leaving to work out side of the country and she seems so cold no emotions showing that it will be hard. It bothers me.
once you cheat you can't go back anon, you will be no better than the person who cheated on you. I have friends who have been cheated on and it destroyed them and they start an ugly cycle of cheating on their next partners. Tell her how you're feeling anon and if it comes down to it and you still want to cheat dump your gf.
Almost cheated on my girlfriend yesterday, but then when it became an actual possibility I started feeling like shit and stopped.
Yeah sometimes when I can't think of the answer and I know I'm not gonna be able to get the question right, I consider looking at my classmate's test, but I just can't bring myself to do it. I probably haven't cheated since elementary school. I would at least try guessing the answer first as opposed to cheating
>>17191571
I'm quite aware of the cycle of once a cheater always a cheater. Little back story
> Know for 5 years
> Date 1 year then break up
> After half a year again we date, then again break up
> After almost a year we are again back together
> I've given her the choice
> "Either be with me till the rest of the life or get the fuck out of here"
> She stayed
I'm no cheater, nor will be any time soon. But it's killing me this unhappy life that I have and she is only part of the reasons.
Oh I guess I can still pack my stuff and leave the country and start over again somewhere else, ha?
>>17191579
I've been in that place on multiple occasions, didn't have the balls to do it.
>>17191583
Really interesting compassion, sadly enough cannot find an advice in there.
>>17191589
I don't think cheating is inherently wrong, as long as you end things with your partner as soon as possible. I'd spare them the details. But if you want to stay with them, you gotta come clean.
Why cheat? If you found somebody else and you care so little about your gf/bf that you would cheat on them why not just be real and tell them you're done and leave them? Why cause them extra heartache? I fucking hate cheaters. Just be an adult and end the relationship. Don't hurt them.
>>17191597
>>17191605
> inb4 again never cheated
Let's say I'm in unclear path at the moment and dark times has raised upon my days.
> Confusion
> Insecurity
> Low self-steam
It's been years since I was like this, I was usually the confident guy, maybe sometimes too confident but times changed I guess.
>>17191589
you say she feels distant and cold? can you describe what you mean? Also I think a bit of info on how far away she's going, how long for, and when would help
>>17191617
I was referring to the last week, she is leaving the country for several months and she is cold, showing no emotion that it's a period of time when we will be apart.
Aside from that I did had the talk with her about why you seem so cold and "don't give a fuck" mode on. Answer was,
>I'm having a great time with you and I'm not looking only for the last week but the whole time we are together.
>>17191626
have you thought that maybe she does love you but is currently mentally ill? as in depressed? I know people who are in relationships can seem like they're getting bored but really they need help. If this is true I can imagine she wouldn't just open up if you asked but maybe try anyway. dont' give up on a few missed attempts at emotion from her. I'm only saying she might be depressed because she is portraying similar behavior to that of someone with depression. It may cause you to suffer and I can see why you feel the need to cheat because you're laying your heart out and all you want is an emotional response, but trust me, cheating will not fulfill the gap. you care about her so don't give up. keep laying out your heart anon
>>17191650
Ah, the point where she cannot open emotionally towards me I don't get it. We are back together because last year she figured out that she can count on me, that I will always be there for her and stand for her no matter what. That's the reason why I waited for her, that's the reason why I risked everything I had at the time of beginning.
I will always be there for her, maybe with time and the distance it will be different, changed in a way, I cannot give up on her.
*sigh*
I'm also planning to go there, travel in the summer to surprise her for the bday also questioning it now.
> inb4 4 years ago I returned in the country for her
> Blew away several good job offers
> Blew away travel to US and Norway as well
I do love her, but the point where you are used for that one person that you relay on and that one person doesn't show it back, it puts you in a really insecure place.
>>17191678
you sound like a good person anon. I'll sum it up.
You care about her.
you put a lot into loving her but she doesn't give the same back.
It's impossible for me to know and hard for you to tell why she is actin the way she is but we know it's hurting you.
You could leave because it is damaging to invest so much and get little back but it's hard to do so because you want what you used to have and you don't want to hurt her even more.
You could stay and she could eventually open up but there are always chances of you getting hurt and things not changing. The long distance would be hard.
I believe your solution is to lay out these fact with honesty because there has to be a point where you decide whether or not you trade your happiness for hers and stay or you walk because its hurting you.
Stay = chance to get better but uncertainty is there and most likely will be difficult but potential to be most rewarding.
Leave = ends struggle but can remain as a regret.
Personally I would hold on because you only have one life to live and sharing it with someone with complete connection is a rare thing.
>>17191699
> Nice dubs.
I'm unaware who you are and where you are but Thank you.
It's not the first time I'll get hurt by this girl, heh with all the times and everything it will be just a new scar to the collection I have and won't hurt as much as before. i guess
I will stay with her no matter what, at least I'm a man of my words and wasn't the whole point of a relationship(marriage) to be there in good and bad?
> Yeah we had talked about marriage and jokes about how we will live and who will walk the kids or should we have a dog or dogs(Yup, there is no not to have.)
>>17191708
accepting that there will be pain and it won't be pretty while holding on to the end goal gives you a realistic chance anon, don't give up.
*flies away*
