I'm 20 years old. As a kid, I could really get into something and spend hours and hours doing it in one sitting, be it drawing, reading, or whatever else. I can't do that to save my life, now. It's like it's mentally exhausting just to focus on anything, even if it's something I want to do. I can work a lot doing less enjoyable things, like my shitty job, but the moment I have to focus and exert mental effort into learning a new thing or practicing a skill, I burn out in around 30 minutes and just can't stand doing it anymore.
I've been diagnosed with depression by two psychologists, but I don't get treatment because I had to convince them I was not to keep from being indefinitely institutionalized, and my family would think I'm batshit insane so I can't go to anyone as long as I remain on their insurance.
>>17187636
>Requires treatment
>Avoids treatment
>Wants help from people
>Avoids people
wew
I think your problems are bigger than finding shit to be interested in, kiddo.
>>17187649
The "treatment" was indefinite detention until at least my 18th birthday, Anon; so around six months, against my consent because my consent didn't matter as a minor.
My family are a bunch of jerks who stole my identity, ruined my credit, and have screwed me out of being able to finish my degree.
Neither treatment or the people surrounding me are valid options.
Bump since my /adv/ threads have a tendency to die with one non-response.
>>17187739
What do you want from /adv/? A professional diagnosis? You've already had two. This is a generic advice board where people generally ask for relationship advice and occasionally other mundane things. Making a topic prefacing that you're not a kid because you're 20 (heh) and then proceeding to spout a flow of sewage about everything wrong in your life followed by a simple "what's wrong with me?" isn't going to get you any responses or help.
>>17187670
Jesus H. Christ, what kind of county do you live in?
I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder nearly a year ago and no talk about institutionalization ever came up; do you give people the impression that you'll hurt yourself or others?
>>17187761
In the legal sense relevant to consenting to medical procedures, I'm not one anymore.
The rest of the post wasn't a list of everything wrong with my life; it was relevant to the statement that I can't hold interest in things.
Though you're right; it was foolish to expect much beyond perhaps an acknowledgement this thread existed; if the actual people with at the very least a passing interest in helping don't, there's no reason any anons would.
>>17187778
US
No; I don't so much as bring up such negativity beyond as an anon or with very close friends. I used to have a confidant, so to speak, but they've since cut contact with me. I can only imagine I was too much of a drag for too long, haha.
Though, personally, I have given thought to self-harm. I don't have any intention of doing so, but I do have an exit strategy, so to speak, if I did wish to end my life. As much as I dislike people, I'd still never have the intention of hurting others.
>>17187787
Just remember that your wrist isn't even worth the value of the razor, kid.
Find a reason to live.
>>17187977
I can't, unfortunately. I'd like to, though.
>>17187670
you sound like me, I'd try to do something like reading, anything will do for 23 days, it forms a habit after 23 or so days 30 mins or so, keeps you from killing yourself at least.
>>17187636
Classic depression famalam.
You aren't gonna get your attention span back until you get fixed. Live with this knowledge or go get treated. I suggest the latter.
>>17189425
Is there any way to get treated without it showing up on my parents' insurance?
>>17189877
Exercise every day and completely revamp your diet. Go out into the sun and get adequate amounts of sunlight. Physical activity and diet has shown to be one of the most effective combatants for depression.
Depression sucks, if your serious about being diagnosed this is what your life is going to be like. It's always going to be that dog following you. You just need to accept it and take care of it. Ignoring it won't make it go away but will only make it worse.
>>17189912
Why would I always be depressed beyond this point if I hadn't always been depressed as a kid?
>>17189425
Can you still have depression if you don't remember any strong reason or event causing it?
