Revenge porn
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
I want to keep this short at straight to the point.
I was dating a guy for a long time, and I messed up, I mean really messed up. I wanted to make things work and make it up to him but he wasn't having any of it. We have not been together for a good few moths now, but hes decided it was only fair on him that he posted some of my personal pictures and contact into. Now what I want advice on is if I should report it or not because hes done it without my consent so its classed as revenge porn, which is illegal where I live. At first I thought I deserved it but after talking to a few people Ive realised I don't. I want to be the bigger person and just move on from it, but if I see my pictures online its just going to bring it all back up and I'm trying so hard to get over it all. It wants a military lifestyle so this is why Im hesitant to report it as it would give him a record, I still love this guy and don't want to mess his life up but what hes done wasn't cool.
Report it.
If you let it go and someone happens to find it, you're going to be questioned as to why you didn't report it when you knew it was illegal.
They'll think that you were willing and you'll come off even worse. Don't be stupid.
What do you want us to say, really OP? You want me to coddle your feeling and hurt emotions.
Fuck the both of you. That's a fact. You both fucked up and are terrible people. Let me guess, you cheated on him?
You want to be the bigger person? Then fucking walk away. You messed up, he messed up. Two wrongs don't make a right.
That's your lesson. Learn from it and realize that you are now part a vast understanding of the human species doing stupid shit to each other
You probably did deserved it since you're not even telling us what you did.
>>I still love this guy and don't want to mess his life up
Well, he doesn't feel the same way about you. What he's done can affect your future as well, possibly for a very long time. What if you don't move to get them taken down and in a few years after you've landed a job you dig someone finds them and says they can't have that. This could bite you in the ass in all sorts of unexpected ways. And he has set it up.
This isn't just an unkind ex who wrote CUNT on the side of your car. This is some bad shit. React to it. Protect yourself from someone who does not love you and does not want to see you prosper. Report it.
>>17186257
Its pretty telling you assumed she cheated, I doubt every woman with revenge porn having been posted cheated. Even if she did, cheating isn't illegal, revenge porn is.
>>17186264
>two wrongs don't make a right
Outing a criminal isn't a wrong.
>>17186266
Innocent until proven guilty
>>17186266
>>17186257
Yes I sent nudes to someone that wasn't him, I went through a horrible phase that I wish I could go back and changed but it happened and there is nothing I can do about it as much as I want to!
>>17186264
How is reporting an illegal act a wrong?
>>17186294
It's not and I never said to not but OP needs to realize there are consequences to her actions as much as her ex's actions. Both were being dumb in this situation. I'm not going to feel bad for this slut. She's the one being dumb with sex to begin with.
>>17186286
It was a bit stupid of you to include your face.
>>17186310
Yes I know my actions deserve consequences, and I have had other consequences other than just my nudes being posted. I wouldn't have minded if he hadn't posted my contact and work as well.
>>17186285
There's not too many options with girls doing dumb shit. So it was either assuming she cheated or send nudes or some dumb sex shit. And low and behold, she sent nudes! She's a fucking idiot.
I'm not defending her ex at all, report that faggot for all I care. I'm pointing out that when you do dumb shit with sex, these are the consequences. I'm not giving sympathy to a pathetic sob story
>>17186329
well, now the story unfolds a bit. Yeah, I mean if your personal contact info is out there; for sure report him. It's going to be a shitshow no matter which way you chose to go
>>17186245
>I want to be the bigger person and just move on from it,
The bigger person moves on, but reports it anyway. The kinds of people capable of posting revenge porn are abusive and dangerous, and need to be held accountable for their actions. You can forgive him once the judge has passed sentence, or not, as you choose, but This. Must. Happen.
>>17186310
I don't know, maybe consequences that aren't illegal, such as breaking up with her. No need for you to do something you could get fined or jailed for.
>>17186294
smoking weed is illegal, you gonna tell me it's wrong?
OP just ask him to take them down and threaten to report him and ruin his career. if he doesn't, report it. simple.
>>17186371
>abusive and dangerous
cheating is abusive. sending nudes is dangerous. Posting revenge porn is abusive and dangerous as well, but it's a very fitting response to catching your gf sending nudes of herself to other people... now she's got nudes for everyone to see. Still wrong, but poetic justice in some ways.
>>it's a very fitting response to catching your gf sending nudes of herself to other people...
>committing a crime for which you very easily will be caught is a very fitting response to catching your gf sending nudes of herself to other people...
>>17186553
The whole point is that both OP and her ex are fucking retarded. Not defending anyone or the situation at hand.
You make dumbass choices, these are the consequences from either side.
>>17186534
Its becoming legal in more and more places, revenge porn is becoming illegal in more and more places. Ofc, some people think its wrong, but it doesn't effect other people's lives so its a different matter.
>>17186569
noone is saying that the nudes isn't a problem and reporting her ex shouldn't happen.
The whole point is that she fucked up and so did he. Noone is really even siding with her. The only thing most agree on is reporting him.
The bottom line is that they are both fuckups
I'm sorry this happened to you. It happened to me too, only it was with a guy I was with at the time. I hadn't even done anything wrong other than refuse to allow him to be abusive with me. People who do this kind of thing want to destroy you. He's not looking to get even; he will probably not stop at even. You need to report him, tell your friends, tell everybody, and make him a pariah. Nobody deserves to have their future job prospects limited over a few pictures.
>>17186245
Is it posted somewhere where he can delete it? If so, I guess you can ask him to delete it, and report it if he doesn't. Now if it's not somewhere where you can delete it, well... I guess I would report it too if I were you, because with this he is also ruin your chance to get a job. If anyone in your professional network ever sees this, it's bad news.
>>17186245
nah you deserve it for being an attention whore?
