>I am willing to wait another 9 months (when daughter turns 2) before I kick her out of my house.

Yeahhhhh... Usually doesnt go down like that. Most likely YOU will have to leave and she'll get rights of the kid.

You'll get to visit your daughter on wednesdays and every other weekend but it will never be enough for a satisfying relationship for you or her.

And your wife will have about 60% of all your assets.

>>17166997
Welcome to married life with children. It doesn't get any better which is why there's millions of men on married but looking hook up sites.

>>17166997
Go to therapist with her, explain to her your situation.

Also: do you share your house duties equally? How many hours a day do you take care of your kid, compared to her?

Lol, and then what?
you leave her for another 20 something and have a kid with the 20 something and cycle repeats again until your back hurts too much to leave the house?

>>17167009
Nah none of that is happening. Take all of that out of the equation. Except I am a rotating shift worker so yeah my access will be limited. I did try to choose the mother of my child carefully so i dont need to worry about court.

>>17167018
as equal as possible, I am a rotating shift worker but I help as much as possible of course its my child too and her mother looks after her once a week but I pick her up or drop her off from there.

>>17167020
Nah to be honest I am thinking that really I am just a loner. I have always had a high sex drive so ill be trying to fuck as many chicks as possible which is what I always do while single.

>>17166997
this always seems to be the case with married couples. im only 22 but i was friends with a married couple in there 40s, i remember the guy was arguing with his wife once and he complained that they haven't had sex in over half a years. i think they only stayed together for the kids. The wife of this couple was into the new age and she used it as an escapism. The guy was really depressed and would ignore his wife most of the time. both of them thought the other person was to blame, it was both of them really.

>>17167044
yeah but I mean I just don't understand why she is being the way she is. She always believed that women should be skinny and guys should be strong. She knows how I think and she always agreed with me but now she says she no longer cares. It sucks because I want to spend my life with her but she put on 20kg and I am just not physically attracted to her anymore

>>17167051
its probably her motivations for working out was attracting a guy and starting a family, and now she has that, she doesent have the motivation to continue. still though, she could easily go on a diet, all she has to do is cut her calories, take in less fats etc.

> I just want the woman I married back!

If you want a woman that'll stay the same person and have the same perky tits for life, then your perfect match is a sex doll

>>17167060
Yeah I am doing the best I can as I am cooking everything, just gets a bit hard as a rotational shift worker as I cannot always cook meals. That's when she gets into the burger king on top of drinking around 4 cans of beer a night for those extra calories.

>>17167068

I have stayed exactly the same physically and mentally. Is it too hard to ask a woman to be the same?

>>17167070
yeah it looks you stagnated and haven't matured mentally

>>17167081
tbf, i wouldent say op is being immature. his wife is only in her mid 20s and she has clearly picked up a terrible eating habit. if she carries on this way, she will become extremely unhealthy, and obese.

>>17167085

> Can I get the spark back? Our romance and sex life are completely dead, I am willing to wait another 9 months (when daughter turns 2) before I kick her out of my house. I want her to lose weight and I want us to laugh again and feel in love again. I just want the woman I married back!

Sure.

>>17167081
No, from the beginning of our relationship I told her I will never change. I have my own home, a long term career and financially stable, I have no need to change and I never wanted her to change either. I wanted her exactly the same as the day I met her. But I'll take the physical because in the end sex and good looks is enough for me to keep the family together. As bad as that sounds.

She is only in her mid 20's I was telling her that she can't give up on life so early she is still so young. I will do what I have to do because I'd rather live as a hermit than be miserable with a family.

>>17167085
> Can I get the spark back? Our romance and sex life are completely dead, I am willing to wait another 9 months (when daughter turns 2) before I kick her out of my house. I want her to lose weight and I want us to laugh again and feel in love again. I just want the woman I married back!

Sure.

>>17167093
if she is so weak that she cant even lose weight, she deserves to get kicked out. its not even a case where she has always been fat, she is just being lazy. and she also has a drinking problem, op said she drinks 4 cans every night. she needs to sort herself out.

>>17167113
She probably has a drinking problem because OP is such a selfish bastard who treats her like a fuckdoll

>>17167113
She probably has a drinking problem because OP is such a selfish bastard who treats her like a fuckdoll. OP just wants to justify his future cheating and homewrecking

>>17167113
>>17167113
She probably has a drinking problem because OP is such a selfish bastard who treats her like a fuckdoll. It's obvious OP just wants to justify his future cheating and homewrecking and you swallowed it hook line and sinker. TBF OPs posting here shows he still has guilt feelings and therefore there is still hope in him. But he is clearly treading the douchebag line dangerously

you could argue that she is being selfish too. she is setting a bad example for her daughter, and she is abusing her marriage. selfish is a bull shit word anyway, and you're being selfish as you're expecting other to conform to your own ideas.

>>17167136
lol no
Also I don't think I am selfish. I want her to be how she used to be, she changed both physically and mentally. Also I would end it all before I cheated on her. I would've ended it a while ago but yea we have a lil girl so that makes it harder. I just wish she would diet and exercise like she used to and as I still do.

op isnt perfect, obviously, his reasons behind leaving his wife and cheating are bitter, but, she is being pretty inconsiderate too. she is only in her mid 20s. the shit she is doing is what 50 -60 year olds do when there kids are growing up and they have basically lived there life.

Your not a very understanding person OP. Im guessing she watches the child too while she works?
Im a mother of a 2yo as well and i can say that i literally dont have any time to exercise. I dont even have time to sit and watch a movie or do ANYTHING that i want to do. All my time is used up by work and taking care of my child. I myself am a little overweight and want so bad to exercise but im unable to. I understand your side too though. If you want her to workout in peace, your going to have to wait till your child is at the very least 3 or 4.
She also needs to be more understanding and at least try eating healthy foods if she cant exercise. Her not having sex with you is a big deal too. Idk why woman get like that cause im not one of them, i love my sex. But i would suggest counciling OP.

>>17167070
It is a too much to ask because everyone is different OP.

>>17167159
you dont have to exercise to lose weight though. all you have to do is count your calories, its easy as fuck and so simple. its says the calorie count on food. you could eat shit but lose weight if you took in the right amount calories, and fats etc for your height. you can literally google your height and look up this up.

>>17167140
I could argue that you are defending OP because you're probably in a similar situation yourself. OP is confused right now and his strong emotions and sexual urges are clouding his judgment. I bring perspective and balance to the force whilst you are being an oblivious poor mans Palpatine.

OP, by coming here it's obvious you love her and wants some advice to fix her. But you can't fix your wife she has to do it herself. All you can do as a husband is to ever so lovingly remind her that she needs to take care of her health more as you have kids. For all you know she's probably getting insecure bec pregnancy got her fat whilst you're still fit and active.

>>17167163
Not for everyone though. I know a lot of ppl that have to exercise and count calories to just stay the same weight. Again, everyone is different.

>>17167159
I am thinking counselling too, femanon. But as a shift worker there is plenty of time for her to work out and believe me when I am home I am a father 100% and look after my daughter just as much. She has all the time in the world when I am not at work to exercise because I have my own commercial grade gym at home. We even made a deal that if I sell my nice performance car she would go hardcore exercising, I sold it and she worked out twice a week for 3 weeks and then that was it. I feel a bit betrayed btw desu that I gave up my pride and joy that I had had for 10 years.

>>17167170
I completely agree, a relationship has 2 people and I can't force the other person to do what I want. She does no how important I think it is and always has. Infact its been my only relationship requirement besides staying faithful, to stay in shape because I have been stuck before in an unhealthy relationship where the both of us got fat.

I did put on weight while she was pregnant because she kept bringing home burger king from work before she worked from home. I lost all of that ages ago and I wish she did too.

>>17167171
this, I do realise that a lot of people are fat just because they stuff their face all the time, but it's also true that people don't burn calories at the same rate.

also >>17167163 is right, plus women's bodies burn fat differently and in general they do not get the kind of weight loss benefits that men get from exercise. so OP if your wife exercised, she'd look more toned, which is always good, but the scale would likely not move as much for her as it would for a guy.

OP, you do realise that the moment she has had that kid, it's all over for her in terms of hormone levels and burning fat?