It's different for girls because of cultural reasons. Work out, get hobbies, talk to people.

22 year old virging girl here. What gets me depressed it's not the virginity itself, but the lack of a meaningful connection gets me every time. The fact that some girls jump from relationship to relationship, makes me feel unable to grasp something that seems so simple to other people. The need of someone to validate your existence gets bigger and bigger from time to time. Sometimes I could care less.
So I'm not bothered by my virginity, but over my loneliness. And you just learn to live with it.

>>17160101
I'm getting /fit/ but sometimes I'm too tired from work to train.
My hobbies are nerd hobbies. Surely there are some girls into nerd things who aren't just satisfied by fiction. And I can talk with people fine as long as I'm not attracted to them, my coworker for example she's not fat or ugly and honestly she looks 25, she's very pretty, but she's too old for me. I want fresh young pussy, younger than me possibly. I'm not attracted to her so I can talk with her like one of the guys. It's just when I talk to attractive girls my age that my inexperienced beta virgin self shows.

>>17160116
If you're lonely why don't you just spread your legs for some dude?

>>17160101
>It's different for girls because of cultural reasons.
I don't buy this horseshit for one minute.

A woman can lose her virginity with ease so it is an active choice for her to remain that way. It's much tougher for guys so many of them remain virgins because they CANNOT get a girl.

>>17160221
no, as in its different because it's "bad" for a girl to not be a virgin, whereas it's "bad" for a guy to be a virgin

>>17160214
sex =/= relationship. and it can be very hard to find one with a guy willing to hold off on fucking

>>17160230
Well my mistake but even that is not so true today. Plenty of guys seem to want a girl with some experience today. Of course if you're after a wife you want some pure qt but marriage is much less relevant to younger generations. It's also completely unacceptable to state that sort of thing publicly now.

>>17160116
23 virgin guy here.
I'm not bothered by my virginity one bit (I actually plan to stay virgin until marriage), but the loneliness problem gets so bad after a while, other people seem to not be picky at all when it comes to relationships but I'm so picky I don't think anyone will live up to my standards.
But don't let someone else ever validate your existence, being happy with yourself is the first prerequisite for a happy relationship, even if you're lonely as all hell every day.

>>17160116

This lady summed it up pretty well. I'm a guy, but the way I see it:

Women crave a real connection, and find sex nice
Men crave sex, and find a real connection nice

>>17160236
>tfw girls who don't keep their virginity are sluts
>tfw girls who do keep their virginity end up being too old for you

kill me

>>17160153
>I want fresh young pussy.
No wonder girls won't go near you.

Stop thinking losing your virginity will change you and you'll suddenly be more confident and attractive you've let society convince ypu that being a virgin is something to be ashamed of and that it somehow makes you a loser.

Learn to like yourself, develop some self worth that doesn't revolve around how many girls you've put your penis inside, treat women you're attracted to as human beings and not as objects of your lust and selfish adoration, grow some spine and don't obsess over such retarded male expectations.

>>17160269
Guy here

Not always true

>>17160269
Then why do girls satisfy themselves with fictional connections in their head over fictional characters and don't kill themselves when they get past their expiry date a virgin like they should?

Why are guys unsatisfied by sluts and don't want to be cucks? If sex were all that mattered I wouldn't have a problem being a cuck letting his girl suck dicks and get banged. Yet I do. I want a pure young virgin qt who is loyal to me, not a slut.

>>17160363
Fuck off it's only natural for a man to want fresh young pussy and not stale old trash.

>>17160230
This always confused me. Are the guys supposed to just fuck each other until they marry a girl, so girls stay virgins but guys don't?

>>17160391
That's how it is in many muslim countries, only not with each other but with little boys. Women should see sex as an obligation toward their husbands so they don't lose their purity, so pedophilia is widespread.

>>17160391
It doesn't have to be ten guys fucking ten different girls, there's an entire system where several guys fuck a single girl. We call it "being a slut".

>>17160397
Nobody wants to keep a slut though

Accessible women are sluts, those who aren't are picky and in love with Edward Cullen or some other perfect fictional guy, and they'd rather grow old that way then spread their legs for you... accessible women just aren't enough, prostitutes aren't the same thing... why? Why are there more picky women than sluts? Since they don't reproduce shouldn't they have been bred out long ago?

>>17160080
It's gotta be a cultural thing, most girls are actually told they're more valuable, pure, etc as virgins so if we have sex then great, we got some, and if not then it just makes us weirdly more desirable

You're fixating on losing your virginity so much man it's just not going to happen. You're setting your standards way to high and hyping it up to much in your head. Sex is great no doubt about it. But I've had better highs

>>17160407
>Nobody wants to keep a slut though
Seems like you answered your own question. Sluts are practice girls for inexperienced boys. When you settle down and have kids you most definitely do not want to hook up with a slut.

>>17160269
not always true from my personal experience

Plenty of girls I met have no interest in relationships at all and purely are just for the hook-up. Likewise, I have met a couple (probably less than 10) guys who actually care extremely little for sex. One guy in particular was far more interested in finding a real connection versus mindless sex. Also one other guy who actually has the looks and social skills necessary to get a girl in bed with him never did simply because he wanted a real connection (he is still a virgin to this day)

>>17160408
You also get told if you're a virgin past 25/30 you're past your expiry date and nobody will want you, but that doesn't stop you seems like.

>>17160415
I also don't want to settle down with a old hag. The ideal wife is a virgin 18 year old.

>>17160428
>I also don't want to settle down with a old hag. The ideal wife is a virgin 18 year old.
This kind of thinking is really disgusting, and I'm a dude.

The only people who worry about women being "sluts" are guys AND girls who are horribly insecure about themselves.

Thankfully natural selection usually works out and the insecure guys end up with the girls they end up not wanting and vice versa.

I just hope one day you realise how much of an ass both you guys and girls are to behave like this. You are just behaving like spoilt children.

>>17160437
>The only people who worry about women being "sluts" are guys AND girls who are horribly insecure about themselves.
this is really fucking stupid. you should feel bad for saying something so stupid.

Being slutty is not a good trait.

>>17160437
Look I'm just saying virginity in a woman is actually worth something only when she's young. You know why christmas cakes are called christmas cakes? Because after 25 nobody wants them. Same goes with women. Nobody cares if a 30 year old single is a virgin or not because she's fucking 30 year old, nobody's gonna take her. Expired goods are just as bad as used ones.

>>17160445
b8 or autism? I can't tell.

>>17160437
beta nu-male detected. Go jerk off while your gf tells you about the dozens of dicks she's taken.

>>17160214
>If you're lonely why don't you just spread your legs for some dude?
the same reason you don't shower strange women with money


i want more women to be virginal. it's superior to being a whore

>>17160437
lmao go shill for bernard sanders on /r/cuckold some more

the ideal wife has always been a 15-25 yo virgin with a solid grounding in homemaking.

just because you will never be an ideal husband does not mean others can't be

>>17160153

>I want fresh young pussy

Damn son you a catch , ladies don't let this man get away!

>>17160456
>if I shame a young man for having natural, normal desires maybe he will shack up with a 35 year old single mothers of biracial children

you simply must come up with something original

>>17160454
>I want more cat ladies
You can't compete with /insert fictional husband of their choice/, friendo. And they're not fresh teenagers so it's not worth it.

>>17160462
>if a woman is a virgin at 18 she magically ages 30 years
what?

>>17160459
Its really amusing, because people like you realise that the slut philosophy for females is exactly the same for males.

If a guy fucks a lot of girls, its HIGHLY unlikely that either
a) He would be attracted to them
b) She would want him - why would she want to be in a relationship if hes already been with so many other women?

But wait, I forgot - men of /adv/ don't want to listen to a person who actually has had experience with women, and gone through a lot in life, they would rather bitch and complain about how women are at fault, don't change and then come back complaining again.

My only consolation is that you will eventually grow out of this immature belief system when you actually have more life experience. At least, I hope you grow out of it -unlike some 60+ year old dudes who are still getting brides from phillipines.

>>17160473
You posted a lot of words but didn't say very much. Don't be salty that no one wants you.

>>17160465
Just basing myself on my observations.
The ones who lust after /insert fictional husband of their choice/ and not slut it up when in their teen years are usually ugly/fat/unkempt/are on the spectrum or any combination of the above. When they get to their 20s they can get better but they're unapproachable because they're too satisfied/comfortable with their fantasies, they're not outright cunts but they still have no eye for you. By the time they hit 30 they either start looking around (but now they're already 30) or they just keep on their way.

>>17160484
it isn't their virginity that does that to them

>>17160101
>It's different for girls because of genetic reasons. Work out, get hobbies, talk to people.

Fixed that one for ya.

>>17160484
A lot of girls/women just want true love and don't care for casual sex.

Just lose your virginity with some Tinder whore. I did that. Now I haven't had sex for months and I don't even fucking care, seriously. I still want a relationship though and it is still painful, but at least I don't have that virgin stigma. I could have an asexual girlfriend now though for all I care. Sex really is overrated.

Anyways, I think the coworker is a special case. I knew some girls like that. I noticed a similarity between all of them. They're from broken families, somebody in the family treated them in a way that could be considered abuse, and have mental issues. Wouldn't be surprised if your coworker was like that too. Some girls just plain honestly never felt anything for anyone, but instead grew up into people that have coping mechanisms for being alone/rejected (rejected by family, originally), and these coping mechanisms are better than overcoming your trust issues just because you find somebody attractive (I think she's lying about never feeling anything at all, she at least had crushes unless she's actually asexual/aromantic, but crushes aren't worth the bother). You don't have serious issues, so social pressure and natural need of having sex works.
I actually have trust issues too, and because of that I pushed away girls even though I'm dreaming of a comfy relationship.

>>17160890
>Sex really is overrated.
Say that after you've had sex with someone you're deeply in love with.

>>17160080

As a male:

Lost my virginity at 21,5 and didnt care that much about it

Still no desire in myself to out there and chase pussy. So it is probably people dependent

>>17160926
Eh, that's another story altogether. Like I said, I long for a loving relationship - whether it includes sex or not, although I imagine sex with a person I love would be a very nice addition.
The thing is, if your problem is just being a virgin, there's no difference. If your problem is that you don't have a person who loves you (and you love them) to have sex with, then the female coworker probably also has that problem, but she has coping mechanisms like escapism into animu world which are working really well.

>>17160080
>Ladies
>Virgins
Maybe by choice, it's piss easy for a woman to lose her virginity if she really cares that much about it. Remember OP, women think of sex far differently than you think of it.

>>17160080
I'm a guy and it doesn't bother me that I'm a virgin at 22.

I've tried to date to please my parents but ultimately came to the conclusion that I like solitude more.

>>17160080
that is because females don't have that crazy high sex drive males and they can get most of their emotional needs from beta orbiters/female friends.

>>17160080
>To the ladies:
>How do you stay a virgin so long and not go depressed/suicidal?
They don't stay virgins, they just lie about it, moron.

>>17160080
>To the ladies:
>How do you stay a virgin so long and not go depressed/suicidal?
They don't stay virgins, they just lie about it, moron.

>>17160890
OP here. She gets along very well with her family afaik, from what I've heard and seen her parents adore her and she adores them. Her mother is proud of her because there's not many women in IT and she's a total mommy and daddy's little girl.

>>17160080
Note that she may be schizoid with lowered sex drive (it's a symptom) if she reports no attachments whatsoever (platonic, familial, relationship).
There's men like that too, of course.
In fact, they outnumber the women over 10 to 1 on many population reports, female schizoids are rare.

>>17160116
>What gets me depressed it's not the virginity itself, but the lack of a meaningful connection gets me every time.
Same here. This is actually why true schizoids aren't encouraged to withdraw, it's the deeper emotional need that schizoids still feel despite non needing (or enjoying) casual interaction like small talk or casual sex.
We can learn many lessons from the abnormal.

>>17160153
>And I can talk with people fine as long as I'm not attracted to them
Strangely i don't have this problem at all, despite having pretty severe social anxiety.
It seems like literally everyone else with even minor SA (normal end of spectrum) does. Even totally normal guys.
Anyone else like that or heard of it before?

>>17160363
This (practicing politically correct language) is useful in dating, no matter what your beliefs. You have to know how to say things in ways that make people not punch you in the face.

>>17160391
In many cultures prostitutes fill that role.
In ancient rome at some points, it was codified to the point where non-paid sex outside of marriage was always considered sexual assault (ie you couldn't legally have sex with a female citizen): either the woman physically or otherwise forced the man into it, or the man basically failed to control himself, shamed her father, pre-cucked her future husband, etc.

Kind of funny to note in the history of sexual assault laws since this one actually did basically say "sex is when a man rapes a woman" and yet feminists will still call it extremely misogynistic (because it implies that the male violation of the woman is a crime not just against her but her father and future husband).

I've never understood why people care so much about how many people their women have slept with. As long as you aren't diseased I honestly don't fucking care. The only times I can see it being a problem is if her way of getting off is having a train of dudes ran on her since that's not my idea of a good time even if I am one of those dudes. However, that situation doesn't necessarily correlate to the amount of partners a woman has had. I think people in general should be a bit more lax about this stuff and cut women in general some slack. That's obviously going to be a very unpopular opinion but that's my opinion!

File: bukowski_prefer.jpg (32 KB, 422x500) Image search: [Google]

32 KB, 422x500

>>17162181
Ever read pic related?
It depends how she came out of those relationships/casual sex.
Strong and healthy? Or broken and scarred?
Many men and women think the 2nd is more common.

And there's some technical factors to consider:
>STDs
>Dangerous/insane/violent exes
>iIlicit love-children
>psychological issues related to sex/intimacy
>cluster-B risk factors
>Exes they're still secretly in love with
>commitment issues
More partners generally means more of the above.
For both men and women.

I'm exactly like your colleague but 25 years old. I only feel platonic feelings towards people I enjoy the company of. Not everyone wants sex or romance and that's ok. It took me a long time to accept that.