>>17145774
Start with an appointment with a gp to see if your junk is normal, then ask him to refer you.

Are you on any psych meds? Those can fuck ejaculation up.

There is a female hormone that causes delayed or just straight up non existant ejaculations. Can't rememver what it's called, but maybe you have too much of that?

>>17145774
>What are the main factors that could cause this usually?
Porn and masturbation. You're fully to be blamed yourself.
Porn and masturbation IS the evil, religion is right but only for the wrong reasons.

>>17145776
Yes, i'm currently taking various sleeping medications and xanax
>>17145777
never heard of this
>>17145782
Yeah, despite having a pretty satisfying sexual life I'm still a consumer of porn.

>>17145798
>Yeah, despite having a pretty satisfying sexual life I'm still a consumer of porn.
Then fucking stop. It's simple as that. You're a fucking addict and it's fucking up your sexual life. It's nowhere near satisfying, stop being delusional. You don't even know what craving for sex is and how amazing it feels to get off after the craving.

There are physical issues which prevent ejaculation and are psychological issues. A doctor will ask if you can get off normally with your hand and that'll be the end of the physical.

The psychological side is down to conditioning yourself through specific masturbation and pornography combined with the anxiety having a repeating issue and the usual anxiety some feel with a new partner.

When I first had sex I didn't get off the first half a dozen times or so. I had to get good enough at fucking in order to get myself off as well as get used to relaxing around another person and feel comfortable enough to build up to an orgasm, let alone actually let go.

A decade of regular masturbation didn't exactly help me get used to the sometimes quite subtle sensations and rhythms in sex either and I think the anxiety issue was exasperated by having been sexually abused growing up.

So yeah I kind of sucked at getting off. Luckily my partner was understanding and we kept trying and didn't make a big issue out of it and we just had fun and eventually it happened. Previously I'd 'failed' during 6 one night stands as well, but it was kind of funny because especially when I was younger it seemed to be this mythological thing that attracted some women.

There was a honey moon period where that remained the case for a while, but eventually I kind of got used to specific sex and she kind of enjoyed getting me off fast so I ended up kind of slightly back that way again. One thing I've never understood was why so many women I've known are aroused and fantasise about rapid aggressive sex often in public places, but take a fairly long time to get aroused and reach orgasm. I'm pretty much no different and it seems fairly irrational to fantasise and masturbate to a type of sex which won't actually get you off.

Anyway, several years later I can only get off by squatting on a girls face and having her rim me while choking between my thighs and jerking off at 200 beats per minute.

>>17145845
Same goes for you, shithead. Stop watching porn and beating off and you'll turn back to normal in a few months. >>17145817

>>17145845
I can easily cum with my hand.
Usually when I want to cum during a sexual act I just ask my gf to lick my testicles while I jerk, it's not really the best thing since I'd like to be capable of having an orgasm without my hands but at least she likes it. I also noticed that when I cumshot her the sensation of pleasure is better rather than a simple "masturbation with assistance" but that must be due to my moderate maledom fantasies

>>17145798
>sleep medication and xanax
So you have an anxiety issue.

Fear is the mind and boner killer.
This is more a thing for therapy than a physical problem I'm afraid.

Stopping all porn and all masturbation will help in your case. I don't advise it in any and all situations but in this one, yes.

>>17146016
having a boner and keeping an erection is not an issue (for the moment), problem is that I can't fucking cum.
But in any case you're probably right, all those medications won't help.

>>17146051
Depending on what the sleep medication is (Amitriptyline is often given for that and would cause it) it isn't likely to be that. Usually people take it infrequently as needed instead of daily as well. The Xanax is going to be pretty much like having whiskey dick, benzodiazepines leave me with difficulty orgasming while under the influence. I'd suspect something particular to your personality. Who are you comparing yourself to when you consider yourself to have a problem? Who have you been talking to?

But anyway, what are we talking about here when you are saying "I can't cum". As in you can't orgasm at all? Or only under specific circumstances? This kind of idea that guys are horny insatiable animals unable to hold back from orgasming within minutes because they are so turned on by the prospect of even coming near a vagina is a fucking myth born of simple minded people who brag out of insecurity.

I can't orgasm during regular sex unless it has a specific psychological aspect to it and I know fucking loads of guys who aren't even that into routine sex. Once you get past being a teenager and people lying about it because they are self conscious if they might be different you find out there is a wide amount of variety amongst people.

I need to be completely in the moment and caught up in the mood and it helps if there has been significant foreplay which has made the moment of penetration practically a fetish within itself. Simple sex itself isn't likely to result in an orgasm unless I get at least 30 minutes if not an hour, especially if a condom is involved.

'Risky' sex gets me off quick. Sex where I've got a risk of being discovered, or a time limiting factor to orgasm gets me off quick. Having my balls licked from below while fucking another girl from behind gets me off. Girls begging me for my come or another girl encouraging me or ordering me to come in another girl gets me off. Having my ass played with alongside my penis gets me off quick.

>>17146076
I am a consumer of porn unfortuantely especially lesbo, ironically enough I learned to be very good at oral sex thanks to this (or at least this is what my past and present partner said/says), yet at the same time I hate the idea of having my gf having sex with another woman, probably for the thing "girls know better how to please another girl", this isone reason why I avoid bisexual women like pest even thought that I happened to have encounters with them. They were satisfied with my performance and happy for my "medical issue", yet they made me anxious as fuck and I didn't want to have relationships with them.

As for the medications, I suffer some sleeping problems since around 2 years, I usually take Zolpidem (widely used as a rape drug as well in my country), Flurazepam and Lormetazepam, I take Xanax occasionally in case of panic attacks (I don't have them much in this period). Notice that the problem was present even before I started taking medications.

I never had unprotected sex in my life due to my paranoia with STD's and unwanted pregnancies, I'd rather fap than having unprotected sex in any situation, still, my gf wants to start taking the pill to see if it can solve the problem I said i'm ok with it but i'm still worried about, probably I'll ask her to take a blood test as well.

I agree with you, thinking that men are perpetually horny and uncontrollable animals is ridiculous and kinda sexist.

As I said, the only thing that can make me orgasm is my right hand, let's just say that "assisted masturbation" gives me more pleasure but still I do 70% of the work.

>>17146138
I guess that stop consuming porn would be a good start for me.

>>17146138
Benzos are bad for your sex drive op.

Get your girl on the pill and do a STD test both. The stimulation from an actual vagina is much better.

Stop consuming porn and masturbating that much.

>>17145774
More common than you think. Google Ejaculatory Incompetence.