Find a qt. Persue. Get with them. Complications. Figure out complications. Have a stable relationship. Feel unhappy the entire time. Nothing in the heart when it matters, even though I know I have it good. Eventually break up. They see someone else. Heart starts working and feels like complete fucking hell. Get back together. Repeat.
Is this just what life is supposed to be like or what? I can't fucking deal.
>>17134879
Women don't make you happy; you make yourself happy.
Cliche but it's true. Don't look to others for your own satisfaction - your creator gave you life so you can satisfy yourself.
Also, wanting companionship is different than needing companionship. We don't "need" any single person or group of people, especially if those people bring us down. We do want to be open to companionship.
I think you need to find satisfaction in yourself and then be open to companionship.
>>17134891
Not OP but came to ask, how do you do this?
I agree with what you said. I mostly see friendship and relationships as a luxury and not a necessity but even then it isn't really a luxury I seek out. I have a few friends but I've not come across anyone I feel super close to or anyone I felt like really getting deep with. As far as my own satisfaction goes, I can't tell most of the time. I feel like I'm at a constant tug-of-war or neutral state when I self-reflect. I can't really get a grip on what I want or what defines me as a person. I've thought about it a lot and I'm kinda wondering if what defines you is others' view of you. Just any advice or input would be appreciated, might help OP too
>>17134891
I don't know if it's a want or a need.
I have no idea what I want to do with my life. People constantly tell me I'm amazing and a special person and all that shit because I have a lot of hobbies and talents but I'm just fucking mediocre at all of them and work hard.
I got tired of working an unskilled job, got a skilled trade, and am just as miserable. I create a lot of things and hate them all.
I genuinely love the people I've been with and do all I can for them, but I just end up unhappy and distant and not living up to what they see in me.
>>17134904
Best advice is to stop thinking as much and start doing things instead. Thinking is great but doing is better. Try a bunch of things out and then self-reflect who you are as a person.
>or anyone I felt like really getting deep with
There are different levels of friends. There are friends that are convenient for a use, like going drinking or video gaming every once a while. Then there are people you actually have a connection with.
Truly connecting with someone as a friend or girlfriend is extremely rare. Most people are "friends" - people whose lives brought them together or who are together because of an external reason like a clique.
You should be open to having both types of friends.>>17134923
>I genuinely love the people I've been with and do all I can for them, but I just end up unhappy and distant and not living up to what they see in me.
See above. Also, who fucking cares what they think of you? At the end of the day, it's just you staring at yourself in the mirror. So go try something you could honestly see yourself doing for a living or that you enjoy. Go explore and stop giving such a shit about others.
Really though guys, you're not young forever, you gotta get out there and explore and figure it out. No one is going to hold your hand. No one is going to figure it out for you. Go take some chances and try things you think you might like. At the very least you'll learn something.
>>17135022
Not OP, but going through a similar situation. This honestly helps a lot. You're good at giving advice, mate. Keep up the good work.
>>17135022
Helpful to me as well. What's your story? I definitely need to do, sadly I spend a little too much time fantasizing about being good instead of actually becoming it.
>>17135044
Well thank you
>>17135099
>What's your story?
My momma tells me I'm her challenge child.
I'm a 29 year old man who has been coming to advice basically since the board launched. I was a military brat - went to 3 elementary schools, 3 middle schools, 2 high schools, and 2 college on two continents. My parents were extremely controlling, hyper religious, military types. I'm still unwinding some of that damage, but I'm still eternally thankful for them.
Have 3 degrees from a recognizable university. Bisexual. Been with 2 guys, stopped counting at 50 women, and not enough threesomes and foursomes. Currently dating a pot smoking president of a local sorority.
I've smoked weed since I was a teenager, but not often. I sold kids my spare weed in high school at PE. One of my favorite memories is one of the first times I got high and stood in the hallways surrounded by students switching classes, high as a kite. Then I went to PE high and, while high, got offered free meth in the bathroom. I said no (good boy) and then, at PE class, intentionally walked a "sprint" in full view of the class. My teacher whispered "I hope you don't expect to get an A" as I walked by and I said, "You're damn right I do; can't mess with that 4.0; and you're going to give it to me." I got an A. Stupid Bimbo QT spent the rest of PE on me. It was that "first time" kind of high too, every thing was like an old movie on film reel. Christ can I play that day on repeat?
So my advice? My advice comes from actually living it. I still struggle with what I want to be when I grow up because I know I'm capable of so much more than what I've done and what I'm doing. It's a daily struggle. I've got deep seated issues.
Then I realize we're all fucked up somehow. Then I remember everything I *have* accomplished. Then I stand and keep going.
Keep going. You're capable of more than you realize. Failure won't kill you and success is the dopest drug. I remember where I've come from every time I put on my suit and boots.
