Jesus christ what am I supposed to do. An online acquaintance of mine is so certain that he's going to kill himself Friday, what should I do?
We both suffer from depression, so I really don't know what to tell him. I keep feeding him the "it'll get better eventually" bullshit, but that doesn't really work unless you hear it from someone you're close to. He's not on medicine and I tried suggesting him to get some, but he refuses he just wants to die.
I"m fighting a losing battle, and part of me is wondering why? Is it really so bad someone suffering so much dies? He will get his release wont he? Don't get me wrong I'm doing all I can, I don't know where he lives or any contact information, so all that is is telling him it's better to be alive. but he's so depressed. Is it really worth trying to save him? Some people can't be saved can they?
Even if I just say "goodbye" and let go. No matter what happens I'm going to feel shitty, and of course, this isn't about me.
summed up: Internet acquaintance is going to kill himself friday. What can I do and what should I do.
>>17130191
Most people that want to kill themselves hate themselves. So asking him not to do it for him won't work. Because he doesn't care what happens to him because he hates himself.
Only option is to spin it. Tell him not to do it because of what it will do to you. Not for you, but what it will do to you. It's a pretty dick moves because its basically guilt tripping him into not killing himself but you have to tap into emotions other than self loathing.
>>17130191
Why Friday? Why not tonight?
Your friend is putting all of his emotional instability on you, expecting you to find the solution to his problems instead of finding it himself. This bullshit of scheduling his suicide is attention seeking. This is a situation where you'd need to physically be there to work with him, as communicating through the Internet can only do so much for reassurances. You can't be his keeper; the guy has to show a little initiative on trying to change his circumstances. The harsh truth is if he wants to kill himself, he'll do it anyway, regardless of what you're saying. If he does, you have to remember its not your fault what a broken individual does to himself. You tried, but he refused to help himself. That's not your fault, it's on him.
If you can't help, direct him here. Tell him to start a thread. See where it goes.
You don't know him irl, what do you care if he kills himself
Explain to him how much it would devastate you (and anyone else he cares about) and how you wouldn't be able to handle living if you did. Guilt trip him to the fullest extent of your abilities. Then offer him an out. Tell him you've been thinking of trying self-CBT and have heard it's supposed to be effective for dealing with depression and anxiety (if relevant) and ask him to take a look at these links for you. He has nothing left to lose to start implementing some of these. Just get him to listen along to the bottom one if nothing else.
http://slatestarcodex.com/2014/06/16/things-that-sometimes-help-if-youre-depressed/
http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/selfhelp.htm
http://www.llttf.com/
Exercise and being in light over 1000 lux (sunlight) both increase serotonin levels which isgood for dealing with depression. Try to keep a routine and don't withdraw from society or try to get back out there if you already have. Withdrawing only worsens depression and keeping a routine will make your bad days easier. Do things you (used to) enjoy, even if you don't feel pleasure from them anymore, it can still help somewhat.
Start small, do something you know you can succeed on. Use that momentum to help you go onto the next task. It doesn't have to be big, in fact it can be pathetically inconsequential to anyone who isn't you (or him). When I'm suffering from low motivation I get off my ass by making step one being to stand up before I ever consider doing something. If going outside is too much, then go get dressed to go outside. Then decide if you feel up for it. If not? Be proud you got ready and do something else while you're still standing up. And both of you, learn to like yourselves. Find genuine things to compliment yourselves on every day, aloud and in the mirror. Even if it's tiny. Branch out from there to other compliments, and whenever you catch yourself thinking bad of yourselves, stop and figure out a reason why what you're thinking isn't true.
>>17130191
Nothing you can do. Tell him you'll see him in the next life. Besides, he probably just wants attention.
>>17130191
Depends what type of people you are. You don't have to suffer because he leaves you. I am here for you if that means anything. I can talk to you on skype if we want. I also suffer from depression and it really does suck. I do want to say that the battle you are facing is one that many win but if he actually does it please don't kill yourself.
>>17130191
Hey OP. So, I'm fucked in the head, too. My best advice, tell him what its going to do to you. Not his family, you. Only reason I'm still around is that I've had friends off themselves, and I know how shitty it feels to be left behind. I can't end it knowing what it will do to them, and he probably won't, either. Good luck OP.
>>17130191
>An online acquaintance of mine is so certain that he's going to kill himself Friday, what should I do?
Schedule a clean up for Saturday.
