>>17115932
bump
Am I reading too much into a simple "like"? Is this legitimate cause for concern?

If you trust her, you have nothing to worry about anon.

>>17116077
It's just a like. She didn't comment anything back saying sure or whatever. That sort of like can be like a petty like, sort of like a aww like. Not serious at all if you know what i mean. By the way the aww is not something anyone wants to here it's like a aww that's cute let's move on now etc.

In short yes you're tripping and should stop being so paranoid.

You're not gonna like this, but your relationship will only grow weaker if you take such thing so seriously.

In fact here's the thing, you can be in a relationship with a girl and have 20 dudes just fucking thinking of hitting that. If she wants to be with you, she wants to be with you. They can try whatever, this ain't no goddamn competition unless she doesn't really want you at all. But the worst thing is to stop that trust between you and your girl, because that sometimes just happens to be the first thing to cause what you might fear would happen. Sort of like a self fulfilling prophecy.

>>17116109
This is correct

For some reason, I'm picturing a male primate thumping his chest at another male for getting too close to his mate.

>>17116109
>self fulfilling prophecy
Right. I could see that logically which is why I was holding off on saying anything to her. Cause despite seeing it logically its another thing dealing with the emotional side. I've had trust issues in the past with other girls.
And I sort of get the idea here>>17116105
she has a twin sister dating a dude who has the same problem but with more dudes and I can see they both handle it the same way

Really there's just the (definitely) paranoid little part of me that throws up a red flag with it, wondering if it could happen behind my back because it has in the past.
But really I don't know and shouldn't act until I do find out something. Until then maybe it IS unreasonable.

Thanks anons, this board has always seemed to help bring the shit I can see logically more in tune with my emotional side if that even makes sense

>>17116127
No problem man. Sometimes supressing that paranoia might make things work better for you. Believe me I score pretty high on that and it has brought me a lot of problems.

>>17116119
I feel like (if we want to get philosophical ITT?) this is a part of human existence that has to be acknowledged. We're related to primates after all.
Obviously I shouldn't flip my shit anytime some dude approaches or anything. But It's an honest reaction to the perception of some other male primate trying to jump in on his mate
Excluding bonobo's and swingers kek

nah he definitely likes her dont listen to the cucks and femanons on this board. tell her straight up, you dont like her keeping contact w him when hes clearly interested in her. If she can't respect how you feel on the situation, it won't work out.

>>17116185

Pretty much this. And it isn't about trusting her or not. It's disrespectful to your partner to talk to and keep in contact with someone you know has romantic feelings for you, even if you may not share them.

>>17116185
>>17116200
This speaks to the other side of my feelings on it, yes.
So far though it's just a like. She had told me he hadn't texted her or contacted her after we started dating.
We'll see maybe. Cause it's going to come up between us

>>17115932
as a man you should know what to do, you need to fight him

>>17116284
I'm more of the opinion that fighting is reserved for self defense. Not sure if this post is a joke or not. This is shitty advice cause you're telling me to ignore how my gf might be encouraging his behavior by "liking" such a comment. When I'd rather not spend time getting close to someone who tries to instigate conflicts to feel special.

>>17116284
No he doesn't they haven't done shit.

She's with you for a reason OP and she already friend zoned him once, it's obvious she values you way more than him.

She might be even testing you, don't do anything and just let things flow, if they do start doing it together and then start talking more and more and maybe talking to him more than you THEN talk it out with her as soon as possible.

There's the timing and it needs to be perfect, too early and you come off as overly protective and she will start doubting how much you trust her.

Too late and the feelings will be there.
It's natural to be concerned but she deserves to be trusted considering how she's behaving, just don't do anything unless there's something actually worth worrying about.

You need to do it at the precise spot where the problem might begin and where she can see that things might have been going a bit too far, just plant the seed as casually as you can and switch the conversation, "oh so you're going with that dude huh" and leave it there, don't argue with her or tell her to block him or she will doubt your trust in her.

>>17116371
I agree. It's about the timing. She's going to a show with a girl friend of hers I've met atm. The snaps she's posting to her story on Snapchat have me wondering if he isn't hitting her up on there though. That's the level at which my thoughts are at. I agree with everything you say except that I don't think I can handle them actually working out without me saying something. Due to past experience I feel there's this point in relationships where new levels of honesty break through. I've heard of most statistically ending around 8-9 months because both partners begin to see each other for who they really are and not the Rosy fantasized and romanticized images they hold for each other. Part of me really wonders if she likes the attention. I'm not saying her photos are bad or should stop but I can't help wondering if they're communicating and she's either seeing if I'll say something ( which at this point i'd rather be loved than tested ) or if she's tired of the relationship and seeking a way out or keeping him as backup.
I should note I knew her as an acquaintance while she dated her ex. Even went to a bday party while she dated him (yet that night I was talking to/interested in a friend of hers). She has since admitted she found me attractive back then. So that kinda shit sits n the back of my head a little as well.

>>17116510
Of course shes seeking attention.

Girls LOVE their men getting jealous and they often do it when the relationship is on the first big year or two, it shows that you care about her, twisted and stupid? Yes, but a lot of girls do it.
>>17116109
This anon spoke the truth, she WILL have dudes behind her but you have to balance it out between showing that you care and showing that you're not being possesive.
Or that goes from
>he doesnt cares much, I want more attention from him let me try more
>and more
>ok im fucking this dude and let's see how HE gets


Just timing and balance

>>17116569
I can't help admitting that this kind of game playing makes me question why I care. Not to sound too arrogant but it's not like I have any trouble talking to women or anything. If I were single I wouldn't have a problem talking to new girls. But I stay with her cause I like what we have. I've meant to encourage her in losing weight and staying fit. But from my angle it seems like she likes his attention and willingness to work out with her. In which case that scenario if they go thru with it.. Then I would rather break it off and be single again so I can enjoy that kind of attention from someone else. I just don't get why play games like this. I can't seriously consider a future with someone who will play power games all the time.
Atm I'm granting this is over reaction. I care. I do. But I care less when someone actively tries to make me jealous

>>17116655
All the time?
Isn't this the first time?

Granted, she probably does likes the attention but this is usually just a test, and no matter who you find they will test your love one way or the other because people are insecure.
And this is IF SHES actually doing that, she might just be trying to be nice.
Just give it a bit of time, ask her if shes gonna work out with someone and if its that guy then you should be able to talk to her about it since it seems you guys have been together for a decent amount of time

>>17116677
Right not all the time. I mightve gotten carried away. Based on experience she most likely is just being nice. And I overlooked that about people being insecure. I obviously am as well or otherwise I wouldn't have posted here. Amazing thread anons thanks all.