I don't really come on here and lurk alot.
But there is a minor problem in my life,and I don't know what to do.
Here's my problem.
I have, or had, a best friend of 10+ years (I'm 19 now so you can see this has been a friendship since elementary school.). Let's call him Jason.
Jason and me met in elementary school in my home town and we found out we lived literally a football field length from each other, we liked professional wrestling and anything else young boys like. we spent almost every other weekend doing things and riding the bus with each other.
We get into middle school and were still pretty good friends but girls and other friends kind of made us separate a little.(plus he was a year younger then me). still rode the bus with each other.
When we got into high school we were still really good friends and shit but then I moved to another state for 3 years because my dad got a job there.
I lost track of him for those 3 years.
And i still came home on occasion and passed his house everytime we came home, but never got to see him.
I graduate and come back home and go to college and I reunite with Jason when i was invited by another friend of our that he was having a bon fire.
We embraced each other like we never separated and it was all smiles.
Well....
We started hanging out and for a couple of weeks we were going out to parties every weekend and shit having good times.
I find out hes in a relationship with a girl that ive had bad history with (like we literally hated each others guts growing up) she's like a 3/10 with money.
Anyways I slowly find out that he has became addicted to Marijuana.
I know it can't kill you but from observing his lifestyle its addictive none the less.
He would spend any sort of money he got on it and i admit before i figured i out i was giving him money or buying ridiculous amounts for him, me, and whoever was with us.
Catch up to this year, His addiction has gotten to a point where he's hanging out with other pot heads.
Op here
cont.
Its gotten to a point where hes hanging out with other people who he didnt even like growing up but they have the connections to the weed.
I have smoked weed before and it cool and all but this is getting crazy.
he's told me before he needs weed to operate.
well i recently discovered he doesn't consider me a friend because i dont support his weed addiction and i never give him money.
even his girlfriend the one who is suppose to be the most caring about him wont stop giving him money for it.
He doesn't invite me over to the house to hang out.
The only i ever seen him is with a blunt at my neighbors house (and me and the neighbor have agreed he's fucking himself up)
Well the bottom line was tonight where i saw a facebook post.
now, i know what your saying, dont listen to fucking facebook but he posted this long ass paragraph about hows he thankful for all his friends......and didn't even mention me.
there is only one dude thats probably know him longer then me but the rest, are just other pot heads fueling his addiction.
All I want is the best for my friend but It's heartbreaking to see him just throw our long history out the window because i don't support his addiction.
hel hes still in high school, his senior year, and has pretty much dropped out because all he wants to do is drink beer and smoke weed.
What should i do?
should i just give up and let him go down the path of darkness and pretty much ruin his life
or try and stick with him?
>>17107381
also weed is illegal here where we live and im fearing its going to land him in jail
He let go of you already. You said yourself he doesn't consider you a friend. People change when they grow up. Just let him do his own thing. If you try and "save" him you'll damage your own reputation and image by associating with a person like what he's become and the company he keeps (which, by extension, will be the company you keep). Even so, he won't be the person he was before even if you did manage to save him.
Focus on your future.
>>17107369
>Anyways I slowly find out that he has became addicted to Marijuana.
>His addiction has gotten to a point where he's hanging out with other pot heads.
nigga u dumb as hell.
leave this kid alone his life is none of your concern.
>>17107394
but he's my friend!
Like i literally grew up with him!
And it is my concern because im the only one actually looking out for his future and well being so he doesnt end up broke or in jail!
like how could you say that dick head!
>>17107386
you're are probably right...
I mean he never told me verbally he didnt want me as a friend but He's pushed me away for other people who literally could give two fucks about what happens for their own future.
the other two guys i Don't care about (the pot heads)
if i asked him face to face if we were still friends he would probably say yes but the shit he does is just....
idk.
i've grown up thinking weed was harmless but goddamn my take on it has changed drastically to the point where I don't want anything to do with it.
>>17107398
>>17107405
I know he was your friend, but people change a lot from who they were as children. You're devoted to the memories. If you had met him for the first time at that bonfire, would you become friends then? Why or why not?
As I said, he let go of you already, and he doesn't invite you or hang out. He probably would if you started supporting his addiction. Helping him acquire illegal substances. Do you really want to risk your career as a student for this guy if that's his condition for friendship? Some friend he is.
>>17107413
thanks anon.
Ill take your advice and follow it.
Should i ignore him completely or kinda just be like acquaintances?
because almost everyday he's at my neighbors and the neighbor is super nice and invites me over anytime hes there.
>>17107419
There's no reason why you can't speak to him, but don't go out of your way to do anything with the guy. Just treat him like an acquaintance. If you two happen to see each other at a party, feel free to talk to him.
The important part is that you don't take responsibility for him and don't put any emotional weight into his presence or actions. You say you're the only one looking out for his future, but that's not true. He's not an infant - he's capable of looking out for his own future. He just doesn't care at the moment.
