As we always ask (which should be common sense to most people) - what is your situation?

We cannot provide advice without some sort of context.

>>17092841
Sorry about that.

So I've started working at that company over 1 month ago. And there is really cute girl that I like, she seems to be older than me, and me being what you might call a /robot/ very shy, possible social anxiety and minor depression. But I've build up enough courage, I think, to ask her out.

How, if, should I do it?

don't shit where you eat

>>17092873
This is a 50/50 situation.

You can either strike up a conversation and then lead in to asking her out (which avoids the whole "hey, wanna go out?" bombardment at the start, or you can look at this very true quote from >>17092882.

IMO, if you have nothing to lose, go for it. But if it fails, be warned that you'll have to work with this girl, and things WILL be awkward. Not only that, but if it does go well, and shit hits the fan, it will be even worse.

>>17092882
I thought about it. But we are working in different departments, I don't know if that counts.

And, I've never paid much attention to girls (well, actually they didn't paid much attention to me, to be specific), because I've knew I would fail, as I said, I'm every insecure, shy, depressed. But there is something about her that makes me overcome all of that, and ask her out. I don't know if that makes sense, probably not, sorry.

>>17092838

IMO in situations like this, where you're in intermittent, sustained contact, it's better to act sooner rather than later.

If you hang around her too much without reaching for it, you're just giving her more time to develop feelings for you other than attraction... the longer you go, the more you second-guess yourself.

This of course assumes she's into you. It's up to you to read that. If it was easy to tell but now she's cooling off, you might have missed your window and you should pull the trigger now.

On the other hand, if you're not sure, you're probably not on her short list and it might be an uphill battle. Try flirting a little, and if she doesn't warm up, move on to greener pasture.

>>17092893
>>17092893
And as for asking her out, how should I do it? Do I need to build some kind of basic relationship, or just straight forward ask her "What would you say If I would ask you out, for like a coffee or something". Would that do?

>>17092908
Yeah basically that, just make it simple, don't overcomplicate things a lot, but don't rush it either. Make sure she is happy and feels comfortable around you.

>>17092916
She smiles at me when our eyes meet, and It feels like she could be into me. But, I might exaggerating, and she just politely smiles at me back.

>>17092898
just remember your job is more important and transfers happen and she could end up in your department

even if she isn't in your department having lunch and shit together every day and the constant texts etc and knowing everything you're up to, it gets to be a bit much

>every break
>every everything
>she is there
>not just seeing her smiling face when you get home
>something bad happens, she is still there, even if you're living together

I've rarely seen it work and more often than not end up listening to depressed male and female friends messed up over it when shit goes sour.

>>17092927
That's why you start easy, get to know her for a little bit, and then move quick.

>>17092941
Yep, but that is the problem, I hardy ever get to be in a one on one situation with her.

>>17092927
some girls do this with everyone, not trying to shoot down your hope, but I'm saying observe how she is around everyone else

I was 100% convinced a girl liked me but then I watched her for a while and she would be over the top OMG HI! with literally every guy who came over at work to talk to her. It's just how she is.

Also if you feel like it might be too good to be true, like she's out of your league looks wise, then it probably is. You can of course not be a glass half empty guy like me and go for it and that is admirable, but if she shoots you down and you work together then that really really sucks.

>>17092953

You could make it happen if you wanted... the old "hey I'm going to get lunch/coffee do you want to come along" while walking by in the hall/her cube/whatever is quick and easy. Do something quick where you can hang out for a few minutes, then ask her on a proper date later. It's hard to be a cool suave dude in a work environment for extended periods.

>>17092962
I know what you are trying to say. And yes, I'm very pessimist person.

But I think I'm going to do it, I'm that desperate, haha. And If she says "no", I think its going to be OK, anyway, even work wise, I would just laugh it off, and cry myself to sleep, as long as other people from the office wont hear about that.

>>17092974
they'll hear about it, imagine a girl keeping something like that to herself, it will be around the office before the end of the week

if that doesn't bother you then hell yeah dude go for it

>>17092988
It does, but she doesn't seem like a person that would do that. She strikes me as a kind of shy, and a nice person as well.

What if, after rejection, I would ask her not to mention anybody about that?

Don't do it. Forget her.

>>17093004
listen to yourself my dude

this is a girl we're talking about, everything is news

and she only has to tell one (1) person for it to spread like a cancer. It actually happened to me once when I was a kid. She shot me down, then the next day or whatever someone brought it up at work. It sucked, and I couldn't even imagine a time/opportunity where she could reasonably have brought it up to these people. But she's a woman so she found a way.

>>17093036
Hmm, you're right. I think I'm gonna stick with just talking to her, building some relationship, and see how it goes along, how about that?

>>17093050
most of the success ive had with women is when I didn't do much and was just myself

>>17093064
just want to add to that, you will KNOW when they like you. And asking them out at that point will be easy. I'm shy myself and usually they made the first move.

Only do it if you are quitting soon. Cause of this >>17092882
I learned that the hard way

>>17093216
Doesn't seem like it. I just started working there. Haha.

Anyway, thank you all for advice, guys.