I'm a 20 year old female, turning 21 soon.
I never had any sexual contact with anyone till I was 17, when I met my first boyfriend and had my first kiss and lost my virginity to him.
Ever since then, my fantasies and sexual desires grow darker and darker and it's really hard to suppress it. My fantasies are gross and involve disgusting unsafe public sex that just isn't practical. I used to go to sex clubs but the guy I'm with isn't into that and idk.
Is this even normal? I sometimes get disturbed by the things that turn me on :(
do you. enjoy your youth while it lasts
Do what turns you on. You may find that after experiencing it for real, it actually turns you off. And even if it doesn't, you'll be finding out about yourself. That's always good.So what if your fantasies are dark? Quit worrying about what's "normal" and be you. "normal" people are worried about what you think because they have no idea you might not be "normal", whatever the fuck that is
>>17086417
So long as the fantasies aren't illegal or mean, get over your guilt. And I agree with the other anon - you don't have to experience all of your fantasies. Sometimes the fantasy is enough to get off, and the actual event is meh. Fantasies are great because they're taboo.
>I never had any sexual contact with anyone till I was 17, when I met my first boyfriend and had my first kiss and lost my virginity to him.
Kek why did you include this. Basically everyone had no sexual contact at all until the age where they had their first sexual contact.
>>17086417
I would LOVE to help you explore this side of you and do some of those things with you, but unfortunately this /adv/ and not /soc/ - and I don't go to /soc/.
As long as it's a fantasy and you don't hurt yourself (or anyone), I think it's fine. It's your actions that really count, not your "thought crimes". If it's wearing down your self-esteem or taking over your life, then that would be when it's time to seek help. Other than that, try not to beat yourself up over it. Good luck.
Is it possible for you to create a safe scenario where you can explore some of these fantasies without harming anyone? Perhaps roleplay is your thing.
>>17086417
>I never had any sexual contact with anyone till I was 17
wow what a late bloomer
>>17086417
>I never had any sexual contact with anyone till I was 17, when I met my first boyfriend and had my first kiss and lost my virginity to him.
I just love how you mark this down as some kind of accomplishment or anomaly.
>>17087808
>2016
it kind of is
i lost my virginity at 16 in 2010, and about 80% of my grade had already had sex. most kids lose it around 14 now.
