Women, if the man of your dreams, the love of your life wanted to have anal sex with you regularly, would you do it?

>>17077221
like my dad always says, " if she won't let you fuck her in the ass, move on"

>>17077221
No, because he wouldn't be the man of my dreams, the love of my life if he wanted me to do something I'm not comfortable with.

>>17077243
All joking aside, I agree with this saying.
It's not about the sex or the act, its all about her letting you do it.

I really think that if a girl doesn't let you fuck her in the ass she thinks she is better than you or can probably do better and is "dating down" as they say.

That's why I posed the first question, because Im sure almost all girls would get assfucked for the man of their dreams/love of their life etc.

So if she isnt letting you buttfuck her, she is settling and is trying to assuage her bruised ego by denying you an act that would mean she is really desperately in love with you

>>17077263
exactly the point I was trying to make, if a girls really into you, she's going to find a way to satisfy you

ladies do you know what gyno is and is it a big deal if a guy has it? (mild case)

>>17077274
The converse of that argument is >>17077258.

>>17077258
Okay let me frame the situation then.
You are with guy for 2 years, you are in love, you want to spend rest of life with him etc etc

He sits you down one day and says he really wants you to indulge him with anal.

You tell him no? The man who has proven his love to you? his dedication? his worthiness?

All of that goes away in the blink of an eye because he wants to put his dick in your butt?

And you think you are going to find someone who isn't going to push you to do thigns you are uncomfortable with in life?

The point im trying to make is look at what you are equating with buttsex, in reality you wouldnt really equate like that and just take the dick in your ass

>>17077243
>>17077258
I love the dichotomy. A woman can't be the woman of your dreams if she won't let you stick it in her butt, and a man can't be the man of your dreams if he wants to stick it in your butt.

>>17077284
totally understand, but that just means you're not compatible and you need to move on, unless it's not that big of deal for either party (meaning it's not a big deal for him to go without, or not a big deal for her to step out of her comfort zone) similar to me being an atheist but I would have no problem dating a devout christian and would even go to church if I cared about the girl that much, but she would also have to accept that even though I attend church with her I don't actually wanna be there

>>17077290
In that situation, I'd expect him to understand if I were to say no. I mean, all that stuff you said about the relationship so far is equally valid for him if I said - is our relationship worthless to him just because I won't give him anal?

>>17077263
On the other side of that argument, if she's letting you do it regularly when it's something she doesn't like, that's just the other extreme. She has no self esteem and thinks she has to because she can never do better. Neither is a healthy relationship, both are just people trying to "win". Remember if you focus on winning in a relationship, being with you is what's causing your partner to lose. That really shouldn't be confidence building.

>>17077290
I really fucking hate you cunt, fucking normal people who engage in such sexual acts

>>17077299
He's not the man of my dreams if we're not compatible, is he?

>>17077291
Moral of the story: get together with someone who's okay with doing the stuff you want to do, and vice versa.

>>17077309
You probably eat shit since you like dick in your anus you mentally ill whore

>>17077316
Yeah but nigger you can't just be like, "So, buttsex," on the first date and shit

>>17077309
if you think you and any human on this planet are going to be a 100% perfect match you will end up alone with 30 cats

don't be jennifer aniston

>>17077323
I'm in a happy long term relationship, thanks. And anyway, I don't think a sex life without anal is something that a guy couldn't live without unless he was gay.

>>17077300
sorry to say but this is why a lot of people cheat. it's not that the relationship isn't awesome and you're not a great person, but when peoples sexual desires aren't satisified they get stir crazy

>>17077325
>sex life with mandatory* anal
Sorry

>>17077325
I bet you love semen

>>17077325
yeah but you're not a guy so..... you have limited knowledge of this topic

holy shit why are girl's necks so fucking hot

Should it be easier or harder for people to get into a relationship/get a GF and/or BF?

>>17077329
See >>17077325
>>17077330
If anal is so important to you, try fucking a guy

>>17077341
Not up my asshole :)

>>17077343
And you have a onesided opinion of whether or not a woman should indulge a man in anal.

>>17077221
fuck yeah. a guy who wants to fuck a lot needs a girl who also wants to fuck. Of course if the sex isn't good, then it'll get boring fast.

Girls,

Would you rather date a wealthy 18 year old boy who is white and average looks or a ripped 18 year old chad who is poor

Why this blonde dyke has blonde hair but a brown bush?

Shit is stupefying.

>>17077290

Pfffhhahahaha...

So let me get this straight, you're--literally--"shit testing" her?

Anyway, as a dude who has a girlfriend who doesn't want to do anal, IDGAF. Am I interested? Sure. Do I feel like pressuring her to get over her fears of tearing her asshole and massive pain and discomfort? Nah, not worth it.

I already know her having stuff up her butt is massively uncomfortable for her, so why am I going to push her to do something I know she dislikes, just to prove a point?

>>17077300
You are doign it again though. treating anal sex liek some huge big deal that you cannot fathom doing.
Like he is acting you to murder someone with him.

It's fucking buttsex, it's something that he wants and only you can provide for him, you the woman he loves.

You love him, for good reason, because he is a good man, and you won't do anal because it makes you "uncomfortable"

I bet you would fight and get your ass beat in defense of your husband, stop talking to friends even family if they wronged him or he had problems with him. Maybe move to a different state if you had too, probably quit your job for him if you had too.

But let him fuck you in the ass? That's just too far huh?

I swear I do not understand the way some women think about sex.

>>17077359
Hair dye.

>>17077357
I know this a cliche, but in all seriousness he needs to have a good personality.
I've had both situations and they were both gigantic douches. I didn't care how rich or ripped they were; I couldn't stand them.

>>17077349
>And you have a onesided opinion of whether or not a woman should indulge a man in anal

This isn't about men vs. women. Stop being so defensive and passive aggressive. I simply find the idea that there should be no compromise fucking laughable. Compromise is exactly how relationships work, people try new things for and with each other, and it goes both ways, whether it's a girl getting fucked in the ass for her guy or a guy listening to Alanis Morissette or whatever for his girl. There is give and take.

Scoffing that notion away is just conceited.

>>17077367
The question asked about the man of my dreams. My answer was simple: he wouldn't be the man of my dreams if he wanted anal. If you can't handle the idea that a woman might not want to have anal sex, then that's not my problem. Don't get mad at me for responding to a question

>>17077367
For some women it's really only painful and uncomfortable. A lot of people don't like associating pain and discomfort with intimacy and their partner.

>>17077359
because pubes are usually dark. it's doesn't matter how light the hair is.

>>17077349
okay plenty of guys like oral, doesn't mean I want a dude to suck my dick

>>17077388
If you're so fixated on anal, I can't help but assume you're a closet homosexual

>>17077376
I'm not a douch I just don't have much to talk about, is that a problem

>>17077364
Yea, to prove a point.
There is a guy out there that she will power through all that pain and discomfort for.
You need to find out if you are that guy.

She should be able to trust you when you reassure her that you wont tear her asshole and you are able to introduce her to anal in a way that isnt painful.

If she says no im still scared after that talk then she jsut doesn't think you are worth going through all that trouble for

I suffer from dyslexia and dysfasia, should I bother trying to date anyone?

>>17077396
>and if you're a guy that doesn't like asian girls you're a closet racist

sure

>>17077396
That's a ridiculous assumption to make, though. If men were the only creatures with assholes you might just have a point, but every mammal, including female women, has one.

Might as well say someone who wants to try anal is a zoophiliac

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>>17077298
>How do you even initiate something like this? As a woman I could never imagine engaging in such a practice (even with a secret chikan fetish)

More often than not, it's not me initiating. They just stand close, and then as the bus moves around we touch, and neither of us pulls away. I just take it from there.


There has been maybe one time where I initiated, and it was a girl who was standing in front of me, looked back at me, and was kinda stretching backwards, leaning close to me.

I started extending my hand, trying to get closer to her ass, but the bus jolted, and I basically jammed the back of my hand into her ass. She didn't react, so I started rubbing. She still didn't react, so I turned my hand around and gave a squeeze.

That was really the girl I felt most bad about, because afterwards I saw her often, and she always tried to stand/lean close to me, and I just pretended she wasn't there. Felt like a giant douche.

How do hoes with really long decorated fingernails wipe?

I've always wondered that, it must be a very tricky situation

>>17077385
you are so unbelievably naive, how far in the clouds are you?
How old are you?

It's not about what you fucking want you self absorbed conceited arrogant cunt.

It's about what he wants, the guy you "love"

What are you willing to do for him?
If you can't take a dick in the ass for a guy you love then maybe you only really love yourself.

You chose to avoid all the other questions I asked about what you would do for a man, because if you admitted to being willing to do any of the other shit you would look like a fucking moron because by refusing anal and not refusing those other actions/acts you are literally saying anal sex is worse than them.

Which is ridiculous

>>17077431
girls dont poop dummy

Femanons, serious question from a femanon. is there any way to speed recovery time of your sensitive parts after stimulation? Even though I'm plenty lubed, my clit takes a couple of days to heal (even when I've been gently riding on top and controlling so as not to apply too much pressure). Same with my nips. Sometimes I'll leave my bra on so as not to overstimulate my nipples, but even when he's only licking them or gently sucking, my nips take a couple of days to stop aching. It's kind of frustrating, since I actually prefer rough sex, but my tender bits just won't heal as quickly as I'd like.

I know there's probably not much that can be done, but just wondering whether there are any tips to recovery, like icing down afterwards or something? Eek.

>nsfw question
guys
I have a this fixation on wanting to give my bf (or future bf?) a prostate massage.
would you say that's a turn off? would it be too weird to bring it up to him?

Fellow guys,

Have any of you ever considered hooking up with your friend's sister? Like what would be the repercussions?

My friend's little sister is smokin hot, like an 11/10, and I think I may be falling for her, but she's still a senior in high school whereas me and my friend are in college

Plus my friend's Muslim so he might bomb me in retaliation wat do

>>17077446
you should ask this femanon, apparently that means you secretly like girls? because no ones allowed to be into butt stuff apparently >>17077396
>>17077349

>>17077446
What you're asking is basically the same as this discussion we've been having about a girl doing anal.

He might let you give it a go, he might be an uptight cunt about it, but it doesn't hurt to ask.

>>17077400
Maybe she doesn't trust you based on the conversation after figuring out you went into it with the idea "She has to have anal or she's in the wrong and doesn't value me." She SHOULD be able to trust you, but you aren't able to respect her wishes. Her anxieties about anal HAVE to be about you, and you HAVE to take them personally.

Why would those things make her feel comfortable? Now sex is focused on whether or not she's making you feel secure enough, because if she's not then you're going to assume she doesn't love you and break up.

>>17077457
Don't do it they'll behead you and stone her inshallah

>>17077446
A prostate massage is fine if you are really into it, one max two fingers not a big deal and itll feel great once he gets into it.
To get a guy to do that you are gonna have to really beg, really make it obvious you are doing it because it you like it and not for any novelty reasons or because you find it funny.

>>17077463
>wanting to give a prostate massage means that you like girls
You are aware that only men have prostates, right?

>>17077488
yea but she's a girl that likes butts, girls have butts, so she must like girls right?


ohhhh wait a minute, this is a femanon that actually wants to satisfy the guy she likes, unlike you

>>17077199
Backstory first:
GF and I have an arrangement for a semi-open relationship where both of us are allowed to sleep with other girls (there's some ground rules, but that's the gist of it). So far this has only come into play once for her and technically not for me (threesome with her involved).

Guys, how would you go about finding a girl in my situation? I'm primarily concerned on how to pull the whole "my gf is fine with it" thing off, should they realise that there is a gf

Girls, would you ever believe a guy telling you this? And even if you did, would you still go through with it?

>>17077501
My, you sure know how to let things get to you and hold on to them, don't you?

>>17077221
I am completely opposed to anal, except if a man is willing to be pegged first

And just to add--if regular anal is the only way you will feel sexually satisfied, then we are not compatible

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>>17077502
>So far this has only come into play once for her and technically not for me

Girls,

Would you go out with a guy who, albeit is very attractive, has a terrible sense of humor?

My friend is super attractive and probably has a huge dick, and was even voted best freshman of his college class this year.

But to be honest, his memes are so terrible, like wow this guy's memes make me wanna scream, and not in a good way.

Does he have a chance at all? I'm just lookin out for my boy and will relay any advice to him.

>>17077517
No
>memes
God no. Any guy that refers to memes non-ironically is a guy to stay far away from as well.

>>17077508
>i cant think of a logical and witty comeback

you're a prude and you know it, people like anal, you don't, thats that. stop with the he must be a homo stuff

Guys and gals, is being sensitive a bad thing? Is there a thing as being too sensitive? Is there a difference between being sensitive and being a massive pussy about things?

>>17077472
dude we are operating under the premise that the two people are already in love for a long time. Long enough to know eachother well and trust eachother.

If the above is true when you tell her you promise it wont tear or dmg her asshole she should believe you.
If she doesnt then she doesn't trust you and doesn't love you.

All that's left is the pain factor that can be for the most part avoided, which again if she trust you and loves you, she should believe when you tell her.

At this point the only reason she has to say no is because she doesn't feel like it.
She doesn;t feel like doign something the guy she loves REALLY wants to do, and can only do with her. He can't go anywhere else to indulge his fantasies, he just has her.

At this point it is the reverse of what you said.

SHE should be able to respect his wishes, but she isn't, leading to the conclusion that she is either very selfish or doesn't actually love and or trust the guy that much.

>>17077429
This sounds like a very easy way to accidentally sexually assault someone, some people freeze up if they experience something as profoundly uncomfortable as this and the line for consent here is very grey

>>17077517
Well, no- it's hard to be attracted to someone if he can't make me laugh. Maybe his sense of humor will be hilarious to some lucky girl, though...

>>17077517
One day he will find a girl with a similarly terrible sense of humor and they will fall in love

In the meantime you'll be too busy worrying about other people's lives to find your own girlfriend and you'll be here, alone, posting on 4chan

>>17077523
Ohh, you got me. Whatever shall I do, an anonymous stranger is upset that I don't agree with them and called them a homosexual and they called me a prude!

>>17077502
>would I believe a guy
Maybe, but unless I really already liked you and trusted you to a certain degree, it's unlikely I would make the effort to understand the drama and backstory to how you got into that situation.
>would I still get into something with a guy in an open relationship
No, sorry.

>>17077527

I'm >>17077512, this conversation, for me, comes up long before I fall in love with a man, and sexual compatibility does play a factor in whether or not I decide to get serious with someone

So it would never reach the point of your hypothetical scenario, unless a man is being dishonest about his sexual preferences, in which case he only has himself to blame

guys:
your relationship with your girlfriend has been shakey due mostly in part to her mental instability and slow going process in getting professional help.
She wants to do something nice for you to thank you for being there for her through her bs, and as a like "I'm trying to get better now and I want to work on our relationship too" peace offering.

.... what does she do? He never lets me cook for him or do nice things, but I want to surprise him somehow anyway.

>>17077515
You read the part where I wrote threesome? She said it didn't really count since she was involved. I have yet to sleep with another woman without her present.

>>17077563
Surprise him by making strides in your treatment and investing in building a stable life

>>17077524
Nothing wrong with being sensitive. However, you should know the right times to use your sensitivity (which I am interpreting as "empathy" and "feels") and not just be constantly outraged or depressed over everything.

It's draining to be with someone who takes themselves and life too seriously.

>>17077512
Let me destroy the pegging argument.
First of all, you are using a dildo to penetrate him. You cannot feel the dildo, so no physical stimulation can be experienced by you during the act.
All that is left is the psychology stimulation you get from making the guy you like bend over liek a girl and take a dick like a girl.
Which is more amusing in a novel type of way than anything else for almost all girls
You aren't going to cum pegging a guy. He isn't going to cum being pegged.

also, if the guy agree's to pegging, I guarantee you that you arent goign to eat his ass, and prepare his asshole the way a guy would do yours.

The point is, you aren't into his asshole, he is into yours, sex is something you do for eachother, you want to peg him solely to cause pain, he wants to butt fuck you to get off and hopefully get you off

>>17077567
this is solid advice and I'm just starting the process of finding a therapist and I have a good feeling about it this time.
But I also want to do something immediately nice for now, since I know my mental state is only going to get worse in therapy before it gets better.

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>>17077532
I had that one case where I started it. Every other time, it was started by the girl/woman.
I also had girls pull away, only to start again one minute later, without me moving in the slightest.
Again, the way I "initiate" 99.9% of the time is just not pulling away after SHE touched me.

I actually am really afraid of being a creep, and it often holds me back from doing anything.

>>17077547
it's just silly to me that you think any guy that likes anal is automatically a homo. it's fine if you don't like it, but stop saying boys are homo for wanting to fuck a girl in the butt, it's really not uncommon

>>17077581
I said that any guy who is so fixated on anal that he can't handle the thought of not having it in a relationship is likely a homosexual, hon. I never said that any guy who wants anal is homosexual. It's okay, reading is hard.

>>17077559
You continue to display amazing naivete.

You don't think it's possible that your husband decides that hey ive been married to my wife for 10 years, I know ill only be with her for the rest of my life, id like to try anal now.

The fucking gall of a woman who would tell her husband of ten years that he can't put his dick in her ass in astounding.

Anal is not that big of a deal to plenty of guys, and if they find a great girl they will easily throw it out the window for love and a family. With time things change people grow, and want different things.

Imagining you telling the father of your children who dedicated his whole life to you and your family that your asshole is off limits because it might cause you a little discomfort is laughable.

You literally value your anal virginity OVER EVERYTHING.

Is there nothing in the realm of your imagination that can make a man worthy of your holy asshole? Make him fit to cause the slight uncomfortable 5 minutes in your poop chute?

What exactly do you think you are?

>>17077589
back to square one i guess, I know you have some kinky fetish you don't want to admit, anal is one of those things so I will say it again. its OKAY to be into anal as a dude, does not mean you're a homo, why is this so hard for you to understand?

>>17077568
Well here's the thing, my bf is shy and sensitive. I think its cute. And today was my b day. I told him many times I dont celebrate my b day because of child hood trauma. He kept at it and I eventually yelled at him. He won't talk to me. Im not good at showing feeling. I was raised in a family where showing any emotions was a sign of weakness and wasn't allowed. I would get beat everytime I told my father I loved him, and same thing with my mom. After dad died I was able to show emotions with out the fear of getting beat senseless.I call him names, like dork, nerd, wiener because thats what I was taught to do if I wanted to show my feelings, by name calling. But back to today, while I was yelling bat him I told him why I don't celebrate it. He broke down crying and left the house, got in his car and booked it.

>>17077527
Respecting someone's wishes isn't the same as letting them do something against your will to your body.
Why does really wanting to weigh out over really not wanting to?

If her reasoning is just "meh, she doesn't feel like it" I agree with you. If say, it actually hurts and make her feel physically uncomfortable... what then? How many times is she supposed to keep trying? I ask this based on the original question too as topic seemed to change a bit. First scenario was regularly having anal, but now it sounds more like casual disinterest.

And with hypotheticals, how many times does she have to try with it hurting her and no pleasure before it becomes selfish on the man's part? At what point does it become him not respecting her or how she feels?

>>17077563
Guys actually really like handmade gifts, like "holy shit she really went out of her way here". I don't know if you're into art or crafts though.

You mentioned cooking like it's something you want to do for him, why not just invite him over for dinner then? On a day you know he'll be free tell him well in advance you want to have him over for a meal and time it so you're about about halfway through cooking when he arrives.

Or if you know of something (anything) he's been interested in buying but can't for some reason, you could do that.

>>17077446
Be honest. Tell him how badly you want to do it. He'll probably let you, and it will encourage him to open up about his hidden desires.

Personally I don't want to have anything going up my butt, but if my girlfriend told me she badly wanted to I would let her. (and now I suspect this is a clever reversal of the anal argument)

>>17077401
idk what dysfasia is but your inability to spell doesn't really matter unless it keeps you from employment, and then only if you're a guy you didn't state your sex

>>17077572
>also, if the guy agree's to pegging, I guarantee you that you arent goign to eat his ass, and prepare his asshole the way a guy would do yours.
Absolutely I would

>you want to peg him solely to cause pain
pegging would cause no more pain than anal sex

>The point is, you aren't into his asshole, he is into yours, sex is something you do for eachother...he wants to butt fuck you to get off and hopefully get you off
First, there are other ways women would prefer to get off, so if you're really so concerned with getting your partner off then go with what they prefer. Second, sex is more about sharing intimacy than anything else, and if a man believes anal penetration is the act that will foster that intimacy then I would also like to experience it. Again, he would be doing it for me.

>>17077589
Even though I don't personally wish to engage in a sexual act, doesn't mean I would judge someone who enjoys it. Plenty of straight men enjoy anal, you are ignorant and immature, grow up and learn to be more open-minded. Also, you obviously have no clue how human sexuality works.

>>17077592
My partner has engaged in anal with other women before me, he does not hold the act on a pedestal is understanding of my wishes. Like I mentioned before, if this was his sole means of sexual satisfaction then we would have parted ways long ago. If you're really this into anal, find someone who will be accommodating. Understand that people have their own preferences, and don't take it so personally if someone disagrees with you.

So..I have this problem of being an attractive female who is outgoing and friendly and gets a lot of male attention.. Any guy I talk to on a regular basis starts a mutual attraction. I've only ever been ignored by guys who had gfs. I've still never dated anyone because there's always more guys. How can i just pick one to focus on when next week I'll meet another guy who I'll get along with just as well? It sounds really bad. But I don't want to be a serial dater either. Do i just go the route of let's be "friends who may be attracted to each other but let's see where this goes, no promises" ?'

>>17077613
Depends on what you want. Do you want to fuck till you get bored then move on or are you looking for a husband?

>>17077613
If you're happy with your current situation, then just continue on the same path. If not, then think about what you would like to change and what you would have to change about your actions to achieve that.

I find myself in similar situations when I'm single. But what ultimately happens is I'll date many men who feel "fine", but then I meet an individual that I realize I do not want to miss out on, someone who is worth giving up all other options because we are happier and more compatible than I previously though possible. This is the exact way I ended up with my current significant other, I wanted to try a relationship with him more than I wanted to keep dating around.

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>>17077613
Have you never felt that some guy was different from the rest? That talking to him was easier than to the others?
That you wanted to be near him more often?
Or that your thoughts reverted to him on their own more often than with others?

Because that's what I feel like when I like a girl.

>>17077604
Ok this is good, now we are in the realm of objective physical effects of anal sex.

You are right, if she has tried a few times adn there is still pain, it still hurts then of course they should stop.
As a guy I wouldnt be into making her endure pain over and over again.


The fact of the matter is though, that with proper time and care and warm-up, anal sex not only doesn't hurt, but feels great for the girl.

Even if she doesn't enjoy the sensation you can completely eliminate pain from the equation, again, reducing the act to mild discomfort in order to please the man you love.

When you suck his dick you put yourself in more than mild discomfort most likely.

Also, if you put a vibrator in a girls pussy and stimulate her clit while fuckign her properly warmed up and stretched ass she is gonna cum and enjoy that stuff or at least be distracted enough to let the guy get a little asshole action in

>>17077502
Bumping my question. Wouldnlove to get some perspective on this.

>>17077642
might try and tap into your local poly community? And/or tinder or whatever but I actually have no idea how hookup culture works

>>17077589
>any guy who is so fixated on anal that he can't handle the thought of not having it in a relationship is likely a homosexual
No. Not at all.

>>17077613
>How can i just pick one to focus on when next week I'll meet another guy who I'll get along with just as well?
Take a long hard look at what you want and need in a partner. Sure, some of us can get along with nearly anyone (same here), but we have to figure out what kind of person we're most compatible with.

Any other advice depends on what you're looking for (from casual sex to long-term relationships).

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>>17077604
>isn't the same as letting them do something against your will to your body.
>it actually hurts and make her feel physically uncomfortable... what then?

God ok I'm not into anal, but I'm fixated on spanking, like 95% of the porn I watch isn't even penetration it's just girls getting spanked

Ex loved it, but not all women do. I mean... can't you just TAKE IT? I really really really really want to. And yes I'm willing to let her do things I don't like / hurt me sometimes in exchange.

Like no one is a 100% match because no one is you, only you are you. I mean the fact that I know she doesn't like it but she's letting me anyway is itself suuuper romantic and sweet, and yes I will reciprocate.

Doesn't anyone else think like this?

>>17077613
If not meant as /r9k/ b8...
You get along that well with them BECAUSE you barely know them and aren't in a relationship with them. Flirting and getting along can be easy. The relationship part is hard, because you quickly learn about compatibility and communication. First lesson is usually how much other people suck at it. Second lesson is how much you suck at it.

If you don't get to know people better you won't know their potential for a long term partner. There is no set way of doing this though. Some people like casual dating. Some people like being friends for awhile and then officially dating. For all the supposed rules anyone can make about dating, at the end of the day you just have to wing it. Because you're still dealing an individual, and they might have been told a different set of dating rules than you were. And if you want it to work out, you'll need to adapt.

>>17077633
>The fact of the matter is though, that with proper time and care and warm-up, anal sex not only doesn't hurt, but feels great for the girl.
Not the dude you're talking to, but no. I'll admit, I only talked with a few girls about this, but there was at least two among them who said that the time they tried anal it hurt like fuck, no matter how much care and warm-up was involved.

>>17077651
Every person has a different level of tolerance, and honestly gender issues and roles has a lot to do with it too. My boyfriend pointed this out to me and it was kind of profound, for guys when a girl pushes your boundaries it's usually kind of hot, whereas when a guy does it to a girl it can be a really scary experience. It's easy to cry reverse sexism or whatever but the way he described it was that with men, it's expected that your boundaries are going to be respected, whereas with girls it's not that common that your boundaries will be respected without a fight. So for a girl it might be harder in general to "give" on her boundaries because she has to spend so much time and effort ensuring that she is respected, whereas guys might be more willing to compromise on their likes and dislikes since it's expected that these compromises are still on his terms... if that makes sense.

I can't speak from personal experience because as someone who's been sexually abused my boundaries are way way different from most people's, but it does make some kind of sense to me, so maybe that sheds a little perspective on it.

>>17077651
>I mean... can't you just TAKE IT?
This is going to vary between people. Someone more sensitive will not be able to. Might depend somewhat on how someone views sex and intimacy in their relationship.

I'd be on the other side, where I'd rather know something was hurting my partner/they didn't like it, especially if it was something I viewed as intimate. I'd feel bad hurting my partner to get off. Why not do something we can both enjoy?

My words become gibberish Elder God tier language whenever I try to talk to a super pretty and/or cute girl, wat do?

>>17077715
Practice until you get gud

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>>17077715
Practice.

>>17077721
>Practice

Can't I just DL some software into my brain to make shit easier?

I fucking hate this shit.

Amazingly I can talk to Milf tier women very easily, and extremely super unattractive -5 good looking women obviously, but when it comes to a super hot looking or an extremely adorable girl, European Extreme Dante MUST Die to extreme turbo death tier difficulty.

I fucking hate this shit.

What is flirting even?
How does one spot it, or do it?

>>17077732
>What is flirting even?

I've also been wondering about this.

Me and this girl like each other, but recently she's been sending mixed messages

She said she's not sure this would work in the end because of
Distance (we live 2 hours apart)
Age (i'm 5 years older than her, and she's underage)
Parental consent (because of age, she thinks her parents won't let her, which i agree on)

We had previously agreed on spending the next weekend together before all of this came up, and i told her that we'd talk about it seriously when the day comes

Im stuck /adv/, we really like each other but i don't know what to do to fix this
i mean i know what i have to do, but i'm afraid to lose her

>>17077732
It's literally normal talking, with a above average lighthearted tone.

Basically, take whatever she says in person and see if you would put a smiley face behind it in a text.

Also it usually involves promoting yourself in a natural subtle way.

Also, there should be smiling and laughing.

>>17077512
you really are a dumb fucking bitch.

>>17077732
It depends on the person. It can be a combination of things, being playful, sexual, complimenting someone, teasing someone, etc. Doesn't need to be all at once, it's more something built up over time.
In general being friendly and open with someone, which is why it is often misunderstood. That's why these threads say to just ask someone out.

>>17077446
I may be biased when I say I'd love it because I have fantasies about girls doing stuff to my butt. It never hurts to ask though.

>>17077748
>Age (i'm 5 years older than her, and she's underage)
dude no. Move on. Even if she's 17 and you're 22 that's creepy as fuck.

>>17077751
>>17077757
Too difficult.

Easy mode where/how/when?

>>17077767
anywhere/rich/whenrich

>>17077613
>So..I have this problem of being an attractive female who is outgoing and friendly and gets a lot of male attention..
>. How can i just pick one to focus on when next week I'll meet another guy who I'll get along with just as well?
>Do i just go the route of let's be "friends who may be attracted to each other but let's see where this goes, no promises" ?'


So as a friendly dude who started dating when he was in his 20's and found out he was actually pretty attractive...

There is a lesson you kind of have to learn when you first start dating:

Liking someone because you actually like them is completely different from liking someone because you get along and they like you--so you like them back because you like the attention.

That sounds obvious as fuck, but it's something that you REALLY have to be cautious of and isn't anywhere near as easy to determine as you'd think. When your new to the world of dating and you don't yet have a handle on what emotion means what, it's pretty easy to think you like someone because they're awesome, but actually only like them because you like the pleasant buzz you get from their attention.

It took me a long time and a lot of self-question to realize that that was going on for me. I'd end up dating girls and at some point i'd be thinking, what? Why I am I dating this girl? What made me decide to do this? And I'd feel like shit because they end up liking me way more than I liked them, and I felt like I'd lead them on.

Once I figured it out though, it became easy to figure out, oh hey, I'm just going to just stop getting caught up in the bullshit novelty of it all and just meet people. The people I really get along with, I'll see what's up because I now have enough experience to see when that's happening, and when I'm actually genuinely attracted to someone.

It's all just experience. Go out, live your life, make mistakes, learn from it. That's how you grow.

>>17077769
Fuck you.

This is bullshit.

No I won't pay for sex it's more retarded than killing yourself.

>>17077731
>Can't I just DL some software into my brain to make shit easier?
In 200 years, maybe.
In only 50-100 or so, we'll likely have advanced means of highly-targeted anxiolysis, which is what you're really looking for.

The hard part about practice is that you have to find girls to practice with. Many beautiful girls are unfortunately pretty spoiled (by parents, teachers, other adults, other girls, and of course guys). Making as many female friends as possible helps, since they can often introduce you to other girls with similar interests that you wouldn't run into on your own.

If you want to do it hardcore-modo, join the debate team or drama club (and take the classes if available).

>>17077748
2 hours apart is not bad, it's very doable if you both really want it.
5 years age difference depends on the age: if it's something like 16 to 21, that's hard to overcome right now and you'll have to wait. Age differences become less significant once both are out of high school (then you're both just college students or working adults).
Remember, if she's underage, sex between you is illegal (statutory rape).
Parental consent is unnecessary, this is 2016.

imho, consider the wisdom in what you're doing. For example, if she's a 10th-grader and you're graduating college next year, it's unlikely that she'd make a good match for you. She needs time to grow and mature. Consider stopping the relationship for now, and possible pick it back up once she graduates HS.

>>17077775
no one said pay for sex buddy.

When you are rich you literally jsut go out and talk about being rich and you will get girls all over you and you dont have to say anything or much at all.

>>17077767
Somewhere serving alcohol, find someone too drunk to care, be attractive, and ask "Sex?"

>>17077788
>When you are rich you literally jsut go out and talk about being rich and you will get girls all over you and you dont have to say anything or much at all.
>rich

An Hero chemicals increase most with rich people

When a good thing goes bad it's not the end of the world, it's just the end of a world that you had with one girl

>>17077731
>>17077767
>>Practice
>Can't I just DL some software into my brain to make shit easier?

>Too difficult.
>Easy mode where/how/when?

Entitlement: The Post.

>>17077592
this^

been married over 10 yrs and my wife has never has never let me fuck her in the ass. i've never really pushed the issue too far but in any case she does doesn't want to do it, so I respect her and don't push it. but i'm also gonna do what i want to do so over the yrs on occasion i've fucked different girls in the ass. i'm fairly good looking and a high earner so getting pussy isn't an issue. honestly I wouldn't do it if my wife would let me every once in a while, but fuck it, at this point I now look forward to a little strange every so often.

>>17077760
17 and 22 isn't weird at all
14 and 19 is weird it but if they aren't fucking it's fine

>>17077751
>>17077757
It's that simple?
I guess that I have sorta been flirting with this girl for a while now.

>>17077779
that's what i think i'm gonna tell her
she's too young, and it's going to be a difficult relationship due to her being in highschool
i still want to be friends and hang out with her though

>>17077199
How do i ask a bra size without seeming strange

Do girls ever change?

I'm 23, and did a year of language training, and afterwards several girls (aged 25-26) said something along the lines of "You are an amazing guy and there needs to be more guys like you in the world."

I'd say I'm not a "Nice" guy par say, but I'm not your typical alpha maple or whatever you want to call it. I don't really see myself changing but yeah. After my parents divorce I just try to be a nice person and not be mean to women like my dad was...

However none of these girls wanted to sleep with me either (granted, the one had a boyfriend and the other was a lesbian). Likewise several childhood friends have said similar.

I did have a girlfriend for 2.5 gears, but I broke it off as it was an unhealthy relationship.

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>>17077385
>My answer was simple: he wouldn't be the man of my dreams if he wanted anal.
I'd rephrase that with demand imo
It's almost a guarantee to want things your partner may not be interested in, the big deal is how they handle being told no.

>>17077806
Yes, it is. When you're younger you think of it as some secret code of how to talk with someone and MAKE them attracted to you. It's actually supposed to be mutually engaged in, and is basically having a good easygoing conversation where both people are attracted to each other.

If only one person is flirting, they might be labeled as creepy/slutty. Especially if they consider flirting only as "saying sexual things."

>>17077732

In general, it's basically normal, friendly conversation, that has a slowly growing sense of sexual intensity, often connected with increased eye contact and physical contact.

It can be tricky to spot, as there are a wide variety of circumstances where things can happen, but things like the woman putting her hand on the guy's upper arm while laughing are generally seen as flirtatious.

Doing it is simpler. You just say things that are more complimentary than you might otherwise say.

An example from my recent history:
A girl I briefly hooked up with recently reached out to me following a break up.
She said, complaining about how stupid her new ex was "I've even lost some weight since I moved, so I'm even prettier than when you last saw me."

This one basically comes down to two parts. "Prettier" is a cutesy word, showing a playful relationship. And "since you" reconnects her immediate appearance to me.

My response is blatantly flirtatious: "Prettier? C'est impossible." By denying it's possible, I'm very clearly stating I find her attractive. The use of French is something I do to minimize issues, so I keep it light.

Is it perfect? No, taken out of context, it sounds cheesy. That's because each person flirts differently, based on how they interact normally. Flirting is just that with a touch more heat behind it.

>>17077613
you're too analytical, open up and start living a little. also, keep in mind that you're special but not as special as u think.

>>17077666
a lot of chicks are a little fucked for one reason or another, and you're no exception.

>>17077715
>>17077731

As the others say, Practice.

Personally, I find it helps to imagine the number of situations you would likely be able to handle that they would not. It's a take on the "picture them in their underwear" idea, with the focus more on "remember that you are equally, just differently competent".

I also prefer to think of it in a slightly cartoony way, to help reduce the sense of stakes.

So, if you're, say, a computer science major, imagine the chick you're talking to failing to "hack the governments files" and her computer blowing up, leaving the classic "blown-back hair, singed face" look.

It's stupid and ridiculous, and that's kind of the point: so's being unable to talk to someone because they're pretty. If you're going to be stuck in a silly comedy, so are they.

>>17077457
>Like what would be the repercussions?
He gets mad you're dating/fucking his sister
He gets more mad if you hurt her feelings during a fight
He gets super mad if you guys have a nasty breakup

There are a lot of women around without those problems, I don't think it's worth it.

>>17077524
>Is there a thing as being too sensitive?
Absolutely. I remember my gf at the time cried when I brought up working on our weight together for instance, I was much bigger at the time and she wasn't any better. It's totally fine to have feelings, but you need to have some degree of self control.

>>17077771
>Liking someone because you actually like them is completely different from liking someone because you get along and they like you--so you like them back because you like the attention.
Sadly many of us will probably end up settling for this.
If you're strange or unattractive enough, just finding someone who likes you is a challenge.

>>17077613
Here's my response to this question, which, checking replies, no one seems to have hit quite exactly, but this guy comes closest >>17077654

You date someone to see what they're like under the surface. You don't have to go very far with each guy, but you go to an event, or a party, or a dinner with them, and you learn more. And either that more increases your interest, or it doesn't. If it doesn't, you move on and date someone else. If it does, you date them again, and repeat the process until you find yourself 5-6 dates in with a specific person, and you haven't dated anyone else in a while, and then you're in a relationship.

>>17077844
>YOU MEAN YOU THINK IM FAT?!?!
>you are fat, I am fat too, we are both fat
>I KNOW IM FAT IM NOT STUPID BUT I DIDNT THINK YOU THOUGHT I WAS FAT!
>I'm still attracted to you, but there is always room for improvement... just look at us
>OH AM I SO FAT AND UGLY YOU CANT EVEN LOOK AT ME?!?!?!
>wha-
>YOU AREN'T SOME CALVEIN KLEIN MODEL EITHER YOU KNOW!
>I just said..
>IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE ME AT MY WORST YOU DON'T DESERVE ME AT MY BEST!

>>17077826
It is just that I have never really interacted with girls much in my life, and in general, have zero experience about this sort of shit.
I only ever started to spend time with this one girl this year, and I have developed a massive crush on her. When we spend time together we tend to have pretty light hearted chatter, and laugh a lot etc, but as I had no clue what flirting even is, I didn't really see the chatter we had as anything more than just casual chatter.

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>>17077863
Not quite how it went down. It involved her crying about how I don't like her anymore more so she could wiggle out of the topic. That sort of mentality leaked into other faucets of our relationship, which is a major part of why I left her.

PS don't date bipolar and/or borderline women.

>>17077852
Sadly, almost all men settle for someone like that.
Almost all girls get a large amount of attention from the opposite sex compared to the amount men get.

Obviously, its because men have to work to get attention from any female, while women simply have to reciprocate.

This leads to the tried and true rule of guys dating down and girls dating up.

The second a guy gets his hands on a girl he finds acceptable he clamps the cuffs on because of the sheer amount of effort that is needed to court women.

Girls on the other hand like she said have trouble settling alot because they constantly have so many options and wait until that dreamy guy comes around

>>17077867
its only casual chatter at the beginning, if you are hanging out after that the flirting and physical proximity will become sexually charged and attraction will be.. apparent.

Idk the time frame on this thing but hopefully you havent known her too long.

Anyways, you gotta get close to her, literally next time you hang out with her sit really close her, create contact see how she reacts and more importantly if she reciprocates.

>>17077878
>>17077852

The wisdom of lonely boys at or just out of their teens, who've barely had any experience, and can only speak from failure, resentment, and fear.

Put at least a decade on your self, grow up and stop self pitying, and stop talking like you're speaking some sage "truth" that applies to the world.

>>17077867

Here's a test.

The next time the two of you are hanging out in a semi-private environment, after one of your laughs together, just ask "Hey, you wanna make out?"

It's the kind of line that gives you a lot of directions to go. If she says yes, you're probably in (and at the very least, in for a make-out). If she says no, you can just say "Cool, felt like a moment there, just didn't want to waste it if it was."
if she says "What?" or "You're crazy", you can adapt based on tone.

>>17077897
You are only attacking me while making baseless assumptions and implying you know "better" without contributing any advice of your own.

Fuck off.

Girls: veins on dicks; yay or nay?

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>>17077903

How would you guys/girls react if you saw an extremely super fugly eldritch tier looking dude with a smoking hot girl?

>>17077897
I will say, as a fairly confident guy in my late twenties, that I feel like they're CLOSE to the truth, despite agreeing that they're wrong.

I've seen people who are just un-charismatic. They're not particularly liked by their friends, just tolerated. People who told me I was their best friend, when to me, we were simply "buddies", the kind of person I'd feel no guilt turning down, but would hang out with if they asked and I had nothing better to do. And the vast majority of these people (about 8 out of 10) were men.

I also think there is a definite societal sense and expectation that the man SHOULD be the one working harder to get a relationship, that lacking a relationship makes them less valuable, which can pressure nervous men into clutching to their first good relationship.

I think it has to do with a sense of...I don't know how to phrase this, sexual value? Like, society HATES to acknowledge that women like sex basically as much as men, (Female orgasms, for instance, jack up film ratings much faster than male ones) so there's this sense that men are hunting for a woman who will DEIGN to have sex with them.

But it can happen to women as well, of course. It's somehow tied to a lack of sexual confidence, that's the more general truth.

As it is, the statement "Plenty of people will settle for a bad relationship for fear of not finding a better one" is of course true. It SHOULDN'T be, but for various reasons, it is.

And I will tell you, that even with enough successes under my belt to know that I'm desirable, just being not-typically attractive is a HUGE burden on my confidence in approaching women. And I am literally paid for being confident and engaging.

So I can see how a nervous man, or simply a less confident man, hell, even just a less lucky man, could come out with their views.

>>17077924
I'd be momentarily agog, but assume he had qualities I was unaware of. Rich, big dick, the funniest dude in the state, something like that. I'd probably approach them just to try and find out what it was.

>>17077923
I contributed advice, you could have chose to attack the statements I made, or you could have said I was wrong and given advice that I could attack.

Instead you took the cowards route and simply insulted me and claimed I was wrong.

I didn't insult anyone either.

>>17077923
You know, this brings up an interesting point: why do we say "the pot calling the kettle black"? It's a true statement, even if the pot is black as well.

Is it some twist on the tu quoque fallacy: the idea that, just because the messenger is similarly shameful, that renders the other party's flaws less glaring?

Because yeah, you're both being dicks to each other right now, and you're both also making semi-valid points (Yes, the initial comments were unnecessarily male-centric and defeatist, but on the other hand, Yes, the other guy didn't contribute anything other than insults.)

And now I'm the pedantic dick arguing with both of you, so no one's the winner.

>>17077933
The content was baseless sweeping assertions presented as "truth".

The advice was:
>Put at least a decade on your self, grow up and stop self pitying, and stop talking like you're speaking some sage "truth" that applies to the world.

I take offence when people blindly try to half-assedly expound pure ignorance.

If you're gong to offer advice, present it as an opinion or a viewpoint, not gospel/truth.

>>17077929
Oh look, someone willing to disagree and then offer something of substance to support themselves.
how refreshing.

Im just gonna say, you seem to agree with me on all points only slightly on women settling as much as men. which you struggled to support but here's a big reason

in your late twenties you are seeing alot of women are running against their biological clock and settling because of that.

Look, there is always exceptions to the rule, extremes, anomalies etc.

But there are general trends and rules that most peopel will more or less(as you did) agree with.

This discussion literally stemmed from a girl saying she was attractive and outgoing and had a new guy that she liked every week and can't settle for one...
If Bradd pitt came along, she'd settle.
You can apply that rule to life

>>17077892
I have known her for about 2 months or so. We often spend time together watching movies and playing board games in the common room of the apartment complex we both live in.
We have sat pretty close together, to the point that our legs have been touching, and I have rested my hand on her leg etc a few times. She hasn't done stuff like moved away from me etc, but she also hasn't really reciprocated that sort of stuff, unless you count light kicks, or doing stuff like placing her legs on the spot where I was sitting if I get up momentarily, and then playfully whining when I move her legs away from the spot, as reciprocation.

>>17077901
I don't even know what making out would entail m8. I have never even held hands with a girl, let alone kissed one.

>>17077199
Question for girls, of you and a good male friend have been friends for a while and all of a sudden you slept with this male friend, would you be more inclined to do it again or would it be a one time thing. We've almost had sex before but back then she broke up with her boyfriend not too long before and couldnt go through with it.

>>17077969
No way to answer without knowing why she did in the first place. Otherwise have to completely project. Maybe she had a crush on you for a long time. Maybe she just wanted to hook up and is now immensely regretting it. Maybe she thinks you're bf/gf now. Way too many variables.

>>17077955
Again, your advice was not advice, it was an insult, implying I am young/immature, directly claiming I am self pitying and applying this title of truth and gospel to my post that I never came close to claiming in my post.

You know how fucking funny it is that you posted the kettle pic and just said again that the content was baseless sweeping assertions?

Oh and I never asked for advice, I was giving advice. You just got triggered but can't form a decent argument so went all pompous prick mode

>>17077981
ok sorry ill try and explain it a little more to see if that helps.
We were out drinking that night but we have done it plenty of times before without anything remotely close to happening, but i have recently lost my virginity to another girl a few weeks before it so im assuming she did it because i wont get any feelings for her.

We still hang out every week after its been around 2 months and she hasnt hinted at anything else since. but we are still cool with each other so she definitely doesnt regret it i dont think.

>>17077968
Like leg or thigh?
If its thigh you are pretty much in there, if its leg you still got a good chance.

Sounds like she is waiting for you to make another, bolder, move, is she young? young girls don't reciprocate much usually.

Try alcohol and a movie, if its cold you have a reason to wrap your arm around her.

Next time or whenever you rest your hand on her thigh, look her in the eyes, should show you everything you need to know.

>>17077959

I hate to phrase this like this, but "I don't have time to argue with you."

Like, I seriously would like to engage in a further discussion about what I see as glaring errors in your base assumptions, and even your characterization of my argument, but it would take at least 30, 40 minutes, and it's 2 AM here.

My apologies, and before I go, here's my reduced rebuttal:

The difference is that I clearly state and reveal a sense of doubt in my statements, and a dedication to nuance. Your statements attempt to gloss over (to me) offensively broad swathes of contradictory data points as "extremes/anamolies/exceptions" to your rule. To me, that means you need a BETTER rule.

And I'm argue this didn't start from the conversation about the woman, but rather as a tangent from a point made by the dude responding to her. We're not talking about the fact that if a high-value mate appeared, you'd date them, we're discussing the idea of mutual attraction versus one-sided or tolerated attraction.

Further, you make claims that are fundamentally unsupportable, claiming to know why I see women settling, a claim I NEVER MADE, because of their 'biological clock".

You mean that thing they don't really have to worry about until their mid 30's? Well, it's a good thing I see all my late-teens early-twenties female friends settling because of that, because I associate with a younger crowd due to working at a university for 4 years.

I'm arguing your rule isn't good because plenty of BETTER versions exist. Hell, one of my friends had the statement "whoever cares less has the most power in the relationship", and THAT'S a better explanation for the trend than your earlier points.

Sorry if that came off aggressive, part and parcel of the need to be brief.

Silent Treatment = Apathy?

I'm afraid of trying to gind ad ate in nightlife due to fear of getting beat up by assholes, wat do?

>>17077996
Leg.
And she is 19, but she has had at least one previous relationship, so she is more experienced in this shit than I am.
Neither of us drink, so alcohol is pretty much out of the question.
I am afraid that I am really bad at reading people, so I doubt that looking into her eyes will reveal me anything.

>>17077968
>I don't know what making out would entail.

That statement feels like a lie (or at least a mis-statement), given the latter part of your response. (If you don't know what it entails, what do you mean "let alone kissed one"?)

But in my region, making out refers simply to extended kissing, sometimes stretching to the neck, or feeling of breasts/penis. It's the all-purpose romantic/erotic interaction before anyone would attempt to call it 'sex'.

It's not particularly difficult. You touch the other person, and meet your lips to theirs, potentially moving tongues. It's a fairly intuitive process, normally.

Also, what the hell kind of background to you have to have never held hands with a girl? That's like, the kind of stuff 10 year olds do.

>>17077995
Sounds more like a one night stand then, if it was while drinking. Also if she was worried about you getting feelings for her, there's another reason not to continue with it. Just once is less risky than an ongoing friends with benefits thing.

>>17078019
ok that makes sense. Especially since i've developed some small feelings for her in terms of not being around her enough, so its safe to say i shouldn't pursue sex from her anymore.

>>17078013
I have never really interacted with girls that much, and certainly never been close to any. The closest I have been to a girl before this has been just casual acquaintances. I was way too insecure during my early teens to even talk to girls, and during my later teens, I simply didn't find any of the female acceptances I had to be really that interesting. I guess that I just have a low sex drive or something, as I have never really had any interest in pursuing girls just because I find them attractive. Masturbation has always filled my sexual needs rather sufficiently.

The reason I am interested in this girl, is because for the first time, I feel like I have found someone who I truly click with. I find her company to be extremely enjoyable, and spending time with her is pretty much the best thing I know of right now. It is not that I find her unatractive or anything, it is just that if I only found her attractive, and nothing else, I wouldn't have these feelings for her.
This is the first time I have had a crush on someone, and in general, everything in regards to this shit is new to me.

Anyways, I am not really ok with the idea of making out with her desu. I am afraid of touching her, and I wouldn't know what to do. The whole idea sorta makes me pretty uncomfortable.

>>17077997
Yea you kind of lost me.
I didnt really make a rule, I made observations, so if whoever cares less has the most power explains those observations better then great.

What trend are you talking about?

The trend where men settle far easier and quicker and with women below their league?

So you agree with me then?

and the whole bio clock thing is well known in society, obviously i dont know how many women you see are settling because of that but its happening, probably to any girl who wants a family at your age.
and it starts late twenties because it takes time to fall in love get married etc.

but yea im not sure what we are arguing about anymore, if you are gone oh well.

I think we agree more than anything though, Im just moderately more generalizing than you are.

>>17077897
>>17077929
I'm >>17077852, and I'm speaking from others' experiences, not my own. By others, i don't mean teen boys, I mean grown-ass men. Some in their 70s and 80s. Some in my family.
Sure, I know a couple who've found great, compatible partners and are happily married to them, but I know more that simply had to settle for whatever gal they could find.
Men who are undesirable for whatever reason (ugly, strange, bad personality, etc) still get lonely, and still fear growing old and dying with nobody by their side. If a woman shows interest in them, or even just seems to tolerate their presence, they're not going to think "well, i don't really like her though" or "well, i don't think we're compatible", most will seize the opportunity.

Personally i'm a bit of a hopeless romantic, and this bothers me precisely because I don't want to follow in their footsteps.

>>17078032
Yep. Don't do it. Even if she was playing some sort of game, or is just unsure what she wants, not a stable thing to go after and you will get hurt in the long run.

The guy I've been seeing for almost two months forgot that it's my birthday today. He canceled our plan to see tonight and we happened to see each other today and he didn't congratulate. Is it cool if I just don't mention it at all since it would be really awkward? Also is this a bad thing, I do feel kind of sad over spending this day alone but I guess I should've talked about it more.

>>17078005
yea man at 19 she isn't gonna do shit, especially with only one relationship.

It's all up to you man.
Put your arm around casually and relax see if she gets comfy.

Look at her, smile, see if she smiles back.

Tell her she looks really pretty today.

By this point you should be getting obvious signals one way or another.

from there just like be forward, grab her hand and mess with it, hold it down to her thigh, crack some jokes.

By this point you can slowly try to attempt a kiss imo.

Nothing rushed, slowly bring your face closer so she knows whats going down, and make that shit special son.

oh and try and do all this when you guys are alone, or relatively alone. Not with a group or anything

>>17078040
yeah it just sucks. How just a small time can lead to me overthinking the whole situation, believing she wanted more with me. Being friends for almost 6 years, i value her friendship more than sex with her, but god dam sometimes i swear she would give some sort of hint and i'd fail to react because im unsure of how she feels

>>17078037
Listen, you have to at least kiss her, it doesn't have to be long but it has to be powerful.

After you can take it as slow as you want and she will understand its because you like her alot.

But until you kiss her it won't really click in her head, and its always better to kiss a girl in the moment rather than tell her you like her and kiss her later.

Kiss her man. DO it.

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>>17078052
I get nervous just by imagining that scenario.
I ain't got the confidence to do any of that shit.
Fuck, yesterday, we were completely by ourselves in her room, and I just sat there awkwardly because I didn't know what the heck I should do. I wanted to touch her, hug her etc so bad, but I didn't know if it would have been appropriate.

>>17078044

Define "seeng".

casual dates?
Random hookups?
Exclusive dating?

>>17078061
I don't know how to kiss, nor do I know if she even wants me to kiss her.

>>17078062
dude... alone in her room?

Ok, she knows you like her dude, its obvious.
So you have nothing to worry about, when you tell her she is going to smile and say I know

Thing about people that are bad at reading people, they are also usually bad at not being read themselves.

You have nothing to lose, you could probably say something like how long have you known I really like you?

Thing is she is young and isnt capable of making a move on you, so either you do it or you wait until she gives up on you and finds someone else.

>>17078064
We don't see other people, we have had sex and I think he wants me to be his girlfriend. We met through school and have been liking each other for like three or four months.

>>17078068
Google how to kiss and read nigga

Like I said before, if you casually work up to it you will know if she doesn't want to kiss you FOR SURE.

If you get to the point where you arent sure then go for it because you are just doubting yourself for no reason.

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>>17078073
She has invited me a few times into her room, yes. 3-4 times I think. Yesterday I only left once her room-mate arrived at sometime after midnight. I tried to leave earlier than that, due to me feeling sorta awkward, but she insisted that I stayed.

Anyways, how can I know if she sees me as anything more than a friend?
I am afraid of telling her how much I like her, due to the way she has spoken with distaste about the guys who have been "drooling" after her.

In any case, I hope that I get to spend some more time with her today. She told me yesterday that her room-mate is leaving for a few days, so we can probably spend time in her room, instead of in the common room of the apartment complex.

>>17078081
Easier said than done man. I have no confidence in regards to this.

>>17078013
>It's a fairly intuitive process
I'd disagree with that.
>what the hell kind of background to you have to have never held hands with a girl? That's like, the kind of stuff 10 year olds do.
Not that guy but i haven't either (21 here). I've never been good with people.

>>17078037
>I have never really had any interest in pursuing girls just because I find them attractive
>Masturbation has always filled my sexual needs rather sufficiently.
Same here. I don't understand most guys' attitudes toward girls (or girls' attitudes towards guys, for that matter). Always seemed shallow. As if we were all taught that beauty is on the inside and such, but we're the only shmucks who believed it.

>>17078062
I feel you. I struggle with even simple things like saying/waving hi to someone.
>are they paying attention? do it now! oh shit, they missed it, that was awkward.
>what about now? oh wait, she's talking to someone, not now.
>ok she's looking at her phone... what about now?
>should i say it loudly to get her attention? or should i wait for her to look u ----
"hi, anon!"
"hey, anonette!"
>ok my response wasn't too fluid, but within acceptable parameters
>shit now she's looking at me like she expects me to say something... what am i supposed to say?
>shit i haven't been making eye contact, gotta do that. Not that much though, that's weird, look away now.
>No, not to the left, that means you're being shady. To the right. Preferably above and rightwards of her shoulder.
>ok she's looking away, probably doesn't expect me to say anything then.
>but now we're standing across, facing each other, both looking away, isn't this awkward?
>I know i should have said something. What does that guy on CSI say, "howyahdoin"? i'll say that next time.
You sound like you're better at this shit though. If you can do platonic stuff, shouldn't it be easy to do romantic stuff as well? If you can do a brofist or bro-back-slap, shouldn't the hand-on-thigh thing be pretty easy?

>>17078078

I'm going to read between the lines and assume you never actually talked about being serious, and that means he's not exactly keyed in to all the details of your life.

So, it sucks, but it happens, don't read too much in to it.

Should you bring it up? Up to you really. It might make things awkward, it might not, depends on how you say it. Heck, generally, almost anything can be turned in to a flirt if you can control your tone and not take yourself too seriously.

>>17078093
I am afraid of how she would react to my advances. I have never felt this way towards anyone before, and I don't want to ruin it by acting like a weird creep, or making her uncomfortable.

Anyways, I feel ya m8.
In a way, feel like I missed out on some important lessons in how to read people and behave with them when I was growing up.

>>17078092
DUDE
DUDE
DUDE

have you ever seen her go out with any other guy?
does she spend most of ehr free time with you?

It sounds like you guys already are a couple

You should tell her "you know its like we are a couple"

Also, watch a movie and try to cuddle with her when her roomate is gone.

dude so much potential here bro, so much.

>>17078109
>have you ever seen her go out with any other guy?
Not that I know of.

>does she spend most of ehr free time with you?
Well, lately we have been spending a lot of our free time together, and I at least feel like I have spent most of my free time with hers, but I can't say for certain about her.

>You should tell her "you know its like we are a couple"
I don't want to weird her out by saying something like that though. I still don't know if she sees me as anything more than a friend.
But yeah, I'll try to spend some time with her today.

>>17078120
okay final question, this is a hard one.

Do you think you are in her league when it comes to physical attractiveness?

>>17078125
Hard to say desu.
I don't consider myself that attractive, but nor do I consider myself ugly either. I am sorta average, though somewhat overweight (not a total lardass, but I got a tubby belly and I am in general, a bit out of shape). Of course, I am not the best judge of how attractive I am myself.

As for her, she is pretty. Not sort of cheerleader style, perfect girl prettiness. More of a sorta cutesy, average prettiness. She is also a bit out of shape, though not as much as I am, and I wouldn't call her overweight, just a bit chubby at best.
In short, she isn't so perfectly pretty that she feels imposing for me to spend time with her.

>>17078142
cuddle with her at night, you should be in from that point on.

>>17078144
I am just afraid that she won't reciprocate my feelings for her. Again, I still don't know if she sees me as anything more than a friend.

>sleep well <3 love youuuuuuuuuu
What did she mean by this?

>>17078104
Hmm okay. It's just weird because he asked the date many times and said he was gonna get me some little present. Well I guess I shouldn't assume we're exclusive then, it's not really a thing in my country to date a lot of people at the same time but I will talk about it with him at some point. I'll just forget about this and have fun on my own.

>>17078152
"Sleep well. I love you."
At least one would hope that's what it means.

>>17078147
maybe mention some stuff about how some girl flirted with you at the store to see how she reacts.

Ask her what she does when guys try to hit on her.

Get the conversation going about her love life and yours.

You have to be overthinking this, its super obvious one way or the other.

Go with the flow, and for god sakes tell her she looks really nice today when you see her.

>>17078169
I don't want to lie to her, and I am sorta uncomfortable with the topic or relationships desu.
She has mentioned her ex a few times, and also mentioned shit like online dating etc, but I don't really know how to respond to those topics. They just make me feel awkward.

Also, how do I complement her without sounding creepy?

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>>17077199


What is up with these women who are tight with the pussy when it comes to me, yet when it comes to some asshole they feel fine to take them as a lover?


I treat my women well and these guys they surround themselves with are lousy folks who I hear nothing but complaints about ... I'm getting tired of this shit and gonna just move on ... just looking for another lover in a pretty bad way unfortunately.

>>17078155
Update: I did say to him about it but he honestly just doesn't seem to care. But should he congratulate me or anything since we are not exclusive? I don't understand dating.

>>17078234

Maybe birthdays don't mean anything, maybe he's just a dick, maybe he's not interested in you at all.

It's impossible to say without knowing him (and you) personally, but all we can say is that this is an abnormal situation/response.

Men, how do you pee with a boner? I for the life of me cannot figure this out, especially since I was taught in sex ed that when erect, the tube to the bladder closed

>>17078244

It is, but not fully. It's hard, but possible.

It's actually a little bit like pooping while slightly constipated--you can force it out.

>>17078234
If he asked that many times and said he was going to get you something, but doesn't care at all that he forgot... Honestly sounds like he was just pretending to be excited to sound good. He never really cared about getting you anything or it being your birthday.

Anyway, doesn't sound like a very good person to be in a relationship with. Unless you just want to be fuck buddies or something casual.

>>17078258
Yeah.. I think that if he cared he would've but some reminder on his phone or something. We are not friends of facebook because he doesn't use it much so he couldn't see it from there. Damn I'm still hoping that he is just embarrassed and that's why his answer was just ":D". But we'll see, if he doesn't even apologize I should probably forget about anything serious with him?

>>17078252
But how do you aim?

>>17078244
The hardest part is aiming when you aren't using a urinal. Christ.

>>17078244
You jerk it off so it goes away.

I've been dating someone for about a month but don't want to invite them over as my housemates are filthy pigs that never clean. Even when i go all out and scrub the house it's filthy again within a couple days.

If i'm upfront and honest why, is this a dealbreaker for most people? We already meet up at their parents (whom i get along with) and regularly in town for dates, or even just to see each other without and date pressure.
I just don't want to lose them before i have chance to move house again/kick out my housemates.

>>17077760
Lol no it isn't. When it's 18 and 23 nobody would even bat an eye. Just don't do anything illegal.>>17077748

>>17078276
have your housemates get together and help pay for a maid to clean the common areas. They are surprisingly inexpensive and you can do it once a week with ease.

>>17077263
Wait, what? Women anatomically have no reason to enjoy anal sex. They have no prostate. It is not even 100% clear why some women do derive physical pleasure from it, and even then, when women give each other advice about anal sex one of the first things that comes up is that she needs to make sure she fingers herself during because that can make the sensation of anal sex feel more pleasurable.
For some women it simply feels like reverse pooping. Not to mention some people don't give a fuck about the idea of at some point getting a bit of poop on someone (which is bound to happen sooner or later if you regularly do anal) while others are absolutely horrified by that.

How would you feel if the woman of your dreams wanted to fuck YOU in the butt regularly with a thick strap on? Would you feel above doing that because you feel you're dating down? Or just because it's not something you enjoy in the slightest, despite you having more physical reason to receive pleasure from it?

Having said that I'm not saying that there's zero correlation between how much you like someone and how much you're willing to go out of your comfort zone. But the other way around is also true: there is also correlation between how much you like someone and how willing you are to respect their less than ideal for you preferences. It is immature to think that if someone really loves you they should consistently not care about how something makes them feel.

>>17078290
never thought about this, i'll bring it up with them and see how it goes. cheers

Thanking for sex: Literally never in any universe ever at all, or just for oral/Cunnilingus/BJ/Carpet munching?

>>17077345

Because you can spend endless hours staring at them when sitting behind them on the bus with no one calling you a pervert.

>>17078316
The only time this happened to me was after fulfilling specific fantasies for a guy. It wasn't a turn off or weird or anything, I understood and liked the sentiment of gratitude that I gave him the experience but the downside is that it made me feel like he thought I'd just gotten over myself to do something he wanted. While I very much enjoyed it and was vocal about that... so was he insinuating that I faked/exaggerated that?

Also, never thank for regular intercourse. That seems to play into the trope that women "let" men fuck them as a favor, and any warm blooded woman who loves sex is going to resent that association or the thought that you might think it's that way for her.

I'd say after special effort as an exception it can be done, but stick to regular compliment about how amazing it was, how exciting it was to experience that etc.

>>17077446
Hell naw.All the guys on 4chinz are faggots.Don't listen to them.If my gf wanted to stick her fingers up my ass i'd slap the shit out of her.

>>17077431

That is a very good question.

>>17078316
I think complementing someone or doing something back for them works better. Unless you know they did it specifically for you while not really enjoying it.
Basically if when they finish their attitude is "There, done. Happy now?" you can say "Thank you." For the most part, and in an actual relationship, it just sounds awkward and cringeworthy.

>>17078331
You just take a wad of toilet paper and keep your fingers so that your nails are flat, not pointing up. They also finger themselves and jerk guys off and what not, you get used to navigating them I guess.

>>17077517

No sense of humour is workable. BAD sense of humour is a dealbreaker. Bad sense of humour when they themselves think they're hilarious is just tragic. Bad sense of humour, thinking they're hilarious, and "memeing" is fucking time to take him out back Old Yeller style.

I mean, say we get married. These are the jokes I'm going to have to unconditionally pretend to laugh at for the rest of my fucking life. No fucking thank you.
His only chance is to find someone who thinks he's as funny as he thinks he is.

It's hard enough not cutting my obliviously unfunny friends loose, god damn.

>>17077715

Text them this after you're done making an ass of yourself.

>>17077795

Deep, bro. Can I get a link to your myspace?

>>17078351
>myspace

That thing still exists?

So it happened. I'm honestly embarassed at this point.
I started having sex with a friend and it was just a passing fuck for him(and he thought he was clear about that but we never had a "what are we" convo). I accused him of leading me on, because he crossed all the boundaries(that I didn't set, because I'm damaged and retarded) and his kindness and cultural differences made me think he was into me(well, and wishful thinking admittedly). Apparently he won't date me because I've got a plenty of baggage and he went through a lot of shit fairly recently(and I'm still going through shit).
It took me getting him pissed at me for him to finally say "I don't want to date you" instead of clamming up and repeating the pattern. I felt raped for a few hours but I was partly over infatuation with him before he said anything(because I expected it).
Was I completely in the wrong?

>>17078303
>It is not even 100% clear why some women do derive physical pleasure from it,
Faggot. Clitoral stimulation.
>anatomy expert

>>17078379
sounds like you wanted it at the time, it was not rape.
take your guilt elsewhere.

>>17078385
Er, that was just an expression dude. I meant that I felt horrible. But next day I was over it.

>>17078387
It's not an expression.
It's an accusation that can ruin a persons life in seconds. Do not use it lightly.

how can i make a good impression to my girl's parents?
it would be the first time i meet them, and they don't know we date

>>17078393
Aight. I didn't meant it like that. I'd edit the post if I could. Obviously, I don't think he raped me.

>>17078379

He was in the wrong too, he was just as capable as you of making his feelings clear. And he should know better than to stick his dick in crazy, it's fucking 101.
But yeah you didn't exactly do better. Sounds like just two people miscommunication and completely fucking up. Enjoy your feelings and learn from them. C'est la vie.

>>17078394
Be respectful but not over the top.
This may differ depending on how classy they are. My general goto are to introduce myself (unless your girl wants to instead) to any family members as i cross their path, shake hands with male family members.
Beyond that just listen more than you speak, answer questions honestly and if a conversation starts up you're golden.

>>17078401
thank you
that's about the same that i would do

i'm just worried because she says they're a little overprotective on her and for the most part distrust anyone that has been with her

>>17078400
Well, it's some comfort. Think I'm going to learn from it and fix my life before attempting something like relationship. Thanks anon.

Girls,

Where can I meet women who don't want kids.

...and won't change their mind when biology happens?

Inb4 cancer wards, etc

>>17078404
It was the same with my current girlfriend's parents (it got awkward when i realized i knew her mother beforehand from uni). I got told that her, and her previous boyfriend were separated on either side of the couch and anything more than holding hands was forbidden. Kinda get the feeling they just took a liking to me as i was a bit shy and quiet compared to being very forward, probably just avoided overstepping any boundaries.

>>17078407
May as well kill yourself if you're that much of a fuckup.

I got rejected by my friend months ago and I was sad at the time, so I said somethng like I understood/it was cool etc, that I probably wouldn't be ready anyway but she's "pretty special so it was worth a shot" We're still cool now, it's like nothing happened but I keep remembering texting like that and I cringe myself to death. Is it really as bad as I think? That I straight up told her I think she's pretty special? I mean, god damn

>>17078451
Iktf
I dunno, but I'm embarassad af

>>17078451
I don't think it's cringy. But if you feel like there's stuff left you need to talk about do so.

I know I delayed that talk for almost to long someone "broke up" with me (we only were FWB, but it still left stuff we needed to talk about).

>>17078451

I'd probably cringe for eternity over sending that, but if I received it I'd probably just be like "poor little feller," and quickly forget all about it in favour of cringing over something else I did (that the recipient doesn't even remember).

Like, I literally have no readily accessible memories of someone embarrassing themselves in front of me. Do you guys? You have to fucking dig to find that shit.

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>>17078244
>when erect, the tube to the bladder closed
Mostly. Men have 1 tube for both urine and semen, so the complex of structures at the neck of the bladder goes into one "mode" or the other to prevent mixing. Prostate and urinary sphincter shut off flow of urine during sexual activity. This is autonomous: if a guy has to piss really badly then gets hard, everything goes into "sex mode" so he can have sex and ejaculate properly (even the urge to piss disappears completely unless it's at the point of pain due to bladder pressing on other organs), then the urge returns afterwards when everything goes back to "normal mode". This mechanism is extremely effective, and women have no counterpart to it: that's why women can "squirt" during orgasm but men can't.

Of course, this can go wrong in all kinds of ways: BPH (prostate too big), cancer, hyperactive prostate (goes into "sex mode" when it's not necessary: this is fucking annoying since it happens to me on planes and trains, causing urinary retention for 24 hours or more), retrograde ejaculation (no effective clench, allowing semen to flow into bladder instead of out through urethra), etc.

As for how we piss with boners, we've either trained ourselves to be able to selectively relax the urinary sphincter (in which case the flow is still like through a straw instead of a hose, because the prostate doesn't agree with what we want to do), or we just wait or fap. It's much easier with a semi than rock-hard.

>>17078269
>how do you aim?
Same way we aim a "money shot": the dick has some freedom of motion when hard of course (~15-45 degrees), and for more angles we move our hips and swivel around.

Probably more than you wanted to know about the male anatomy but enjoy

>>17078469
>>17078468
>>17078459
I almost convinced myself I never did that shit and it was just a bad dream but then I saw I still had the messages on my phone and I just wanted to stick my head in an oven.

I sure hope she forgot quickly. She's still cool like I said but I keep getting fucking flashbacks and I think "oh shit I actually told you that and you probably remember god damn"

>>17077199
To men:

If there was no way out of being rejected, how would you prefer to be let down?

Context:
>broke up with my boyfriend of almost two years because he wants kids and I don't
>we still carry on a FWB relationship
>nobody knows that neither of us are 100% single, except our families whom we visit during the holidays like we used to as a couple

>a shy guy is trying to get me to come over to his house, I've said no twice
>poor soul doesn't get the hint, has zero dating experience so it's understandable
>I want to let him know that I'm unavailable even though I'm 'single'

How do I go about this?

>>17078521
Wanna feel better? I got rejected by the same friend 3 times.

My bf gets pissed off at me for not having sexy conversations over the phone enough. I've told him a million times that when I'm talking about something that's not sexy that it makes me feel like hes not listening when he tries to steer the conversation towards sex.

He can't seem to grasp that if I'm sad or stressed or something, a sex joke or him bringing up how he wants to fuck makes me feel worse.

Men: am I being a bitch?

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WHY DO PEOPLE LIKE ANAL THAT IS LITERALLY WHERE YOUR POOPOO IS!

YOU KNOW THAT RIGHT! YOU INSANE MOTHERFUCKERS KNOW THAT YOUR ASS IS WHERE POOPOO COMES FROM RIGHT? JUST THINK ABOUT THAT AND LET IT SINK IN....

>>17078549
>break up with a guy
>carry on fwb relationship
>still appear as couple
>not '100% single'
What are you doing?

Guys:
Does it hurt you in any way if you get an erection, but don't end up cumming?
I'm very new to sex and I want to understand mg boyfriend the best I can. He told me it doesn't hurt him, but it makes him feel hornier more often or something like that. Could any of you please elaborate on how it feels? Or anything you think I should know? Thank you

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>>17078549
Are you interested in the shy guy? Or not? Tell him clearly that although you enjoy spending time with him and he's a good friend, you don't feel the same way and would rather stay friends rather than have a relationship. Stress what you have, and the fact that it's purely a matter of attraction. It's the truth, right?

Forget the bullshit with FWB, either you like Shy Guy or you don't. Stick to that baseline. Also, please don't ghost Shy Guy and remind him you're friends no matter what.

Yours faithfully,
Rejected Shy Guy

>>17078551

Why did you approach the same person 3 times, let alone a friend?

>>17078571
Not that anon, but I wanted to ask a girl out after she said no. Love makes us do stupid things, especially if we aren't accustomed to it

>>17078554
feeding his and possibly their own ego, obv. everything is cool in life so long as the internet facade says so.

>>17078571
First time was because they were flirting with me and I took them too seriously. Second time was because we had sex out of some situational drama but I was too fugly and they were in relationship they wanted to break. THird time was when I started looking hot and we got into fwb arrangment and I didn't got the hint they didn't want to date.
And we are still friends. In fact they still *want* to be friends. It's like nothing happened and it's just going to be awkward for a while.
I'm not retarded enough for 4th time, it's way past the moment I should move on. But should I break this friendship? We are so close it'd be a shame, but if we'll stay in contact idk next time they'll be horny, single and lazy enough - we live half an hour from each other. We are gonna spend time together.
I guess best I can do is not to be fucking retarded.

>>17078549
>If there was no way out of being rejected, how would you prefer to be let down?
With an explanation.

>I want to let him know that I'm unavailable even though I'm 'single'
It sounds like you're confused yourself.
If you still consider your fuckbuddy a BF then tell him you have a BF.
If you're unavailable for some other reason, explain it to him.
If he's not your type, tell him that. For bonus points let him know what that type is so he knows that's the truth and not a cover for the real reason.
If it's some other reason, tell him that reason.

You get the idea.