Ok guys. I might have fucked up badly. I need to know what to do.
I have been seeing a girl (ok, woman, she's 24) for a couple of months now. She had kinda-sorta moved in with me; she still has her own apartment, but she slept here like, five nights out of seven.
A few hours ago I found out she had been sleeping with her ex the other nights. (A mutual friend told me.)
I asked her about that, she admitted it.
I told her to get out of my apartment, and that we were done. She refused to, and said she was going to pick her stuff up first.
I told her to just get the fuck out. Her stuff could wait until I was less pissed at her.
She still refused.
And I kind of punched her in the face, and threw her out.
Then she spent like half an hour yelling at me through my door about how I was a piece of shit, how she was going to call the police and say I had raped her, and stuff like that.
She has gone away now, and I have no fucking idea what to do.
Also. My hand fucking hurts.
Help?
(Picture unrelated, I just grabbed something.)
You fucked up. Why didn't you just let her grab her things? Might wanna keep an eye on that temper of yours.
Dumbass why would you punch her
>>17029014
I dunno. I've been thinking the same thing.
I was just too pissed at how she was all like "yeah, so what are you going to do about it?"
Anyhow, the stuff she has here is a few changes of clothes, some stuff in the bathroom and a phone charger. I didn't think that stuff mattered too much.
>>17029015
I dunno. I was just pissed at her.
I'm really fucked. Aren't I?
>>17029106
Oh yeah. Your only hope, aside from her not contacting the police, is if she gets caught in a lie about events, assuming she really goes forward with the rape charges. Did you have sex before this happened? Either way, that ends very badly for you. Assuming she just tells the truth, your still very much fucked.
Start researching lawyers Pesto (Animaniacs reference, lighten the mood)
>>17028987
Ask your neighbours if they heard what she was yelling through the door about the rape and beg them to support you. I would leave the part about punching her in the face out though.
>>17029145
A few days ago, yeah.
Damn it.
I just wanted her out of my apartment.
>>17029151
Don't do this. Getting other people involved, and trusting them to lie to the police for you, when they might know the whole, part, or a twisted interpretation of events, is really really dumb. This situation is bad enough for OP, don't encourage him to make it worse.
>>17029154
That is better the if you'd had sex today. Now listen to the only good advice for this situation, start looking up lawyers.
Also, work on your temper dickbag.
>>17028987
YOU FUCKED UP BAD. Similar thing happened to me, I just finished 7 years in prison not even a year ago.
>>17029185
Fuck.
I don't suppose the fact that she refused to leave my home is a mitigating circumstance?
>>17029196
No, and you also have no way to prove you didn't rape her. Get yourself into anger mmanagement or talk to a therapist (just don't tell them you punched her, they have to report crimes) this will show the judge that you recognized you had a problem and took steps to fix it.
And start working out NOW. I hope you're big and tough, I got raped in prison. More than once.
>>17029196
How much money you have? You could pay for her silence.
>>17029233
I am already in anger management. I was sent to a boxing gym to "work off aggressions".
So I'm fucked there too.
>>17029238
Fucking nothing.
>>17029196
Quite the opposite as a matter of fact. As someone who has property stored and has been living there 5/7 nights a week, she has similar rights as a renter would. You just don't get paid rent. You actually commited another crime by throwing her out with no notice, in addition to the theft and assault charges. Oh and the possible rape charge, cant forget about that.
See anon, this is why people confront lovers over things like this at a lunch or other public setting. You get the added baby sitters in case things go poorly, and you don't have to deal with them grabbing shit first. Lesson for your next relationship, outside of prison relationships I mean.
>>17028987
DUDE NEVER FUCKING HIT A WOMAN. NO MATTER HOW BADLY YOU WANT TO THEY FUCKING WIN IF YOU EVER EVER EVER HIT THEM....SHE LITERALLY HAS YOUR BALLS IN A VICE NOW. also get out of a boxing gym and into something less fucking aggressive like fucking knitting or art classes some shit.try a different therapist jesus only bad ones would suggest you go to boxing or MMA places to work on your anger...you going to those places are actually a plus in court on HER side if she pursues charges...it shows you are "venting" your "rage".
>>17029276
Fuck.
>>17029283
Damn it.
How the fuck should I know that I shouldn't listen to my therapist!?
>>17029196
no dude cops always say that "you're" supposed to leave and get some fucking "air" or visit a friend. its not fair and its why feminists who say we are equal can get fucked...
>>17029233
were you a pretty boy or does it happen to pretty much everyone?
>>17029243
Wow... so you punched a girl... she is going to accuse you of rape... she sounds like a complete life destroying cunt... and you have no money for hush hush or a lawyer.
Enjoy prison. You will have plenty of time to think about your shitty life choices when you go to sleep a little hungry every night because Tyrone takes your jello cup.
>>17029288
sorry dude not everybody graduates at the top of their class and the more publicly available a therapist is it seems the shittier they get...if a therapist EVER suggest you "vent" leave and find another. people who have committed violent crimes or abuses and "vent" in therapy are always more willing to do harm again.
>>17029291
But it's my home.
She has elsewhere to go.
I don't.
Fuck her you did nothing morllay wrong, saldy hitting her is a crime if she does go to the police just explain it as it was including the false rape threat and they will laugh her out of the court room. Also look up your local laws/consult a lawyer.
>>17029294
well it depends on the prison...federal prison usually has bankers and tax evaders that committed a "federal crime". if you hit a bitch thats "aggravated assault/battery" you'll go to gen pop. at county with all the big nigs and skinheads... i'm really hoping nothing bad happens to you...if she goes for rape...they will also have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you raped her. which is hard when you didn't. you could probably plea your sentence down to something lesser if you really beg/have a good judge....
>>17029302
that doesn't matter to fucking pigs... its why we call them "fucking PIGS!!!"
>>17029308
Yeah, because him crying "she's lying to get me in trouble" is gonna be real convincing while she sits around with punch to the face bruises. Anon boxes, what's about to happen to him isn't entirely right, but if you box you need to be in control enough to not angry punch people in general, even if they are begging to get punched. Otherwise, you need to get in trouble for punching people. That's obvious.
>>17029294
Wouldn't say I'm a pretty boy, happens to about 75%. Ended up doing shit to get put in solitary to get away from it. Really depends on who your cell mate is
Ok. I have had no previous contact with the cops. Not even a fucking parking ticket (can't afford a car).
Will that help?
>>17029302
Find what composure you have and sincerely apologize to her and agree to go down to the police station with her to turn yourself in for punching her.
Here is your hope. Be super polite now to her and the cops, be super level headed and put on your best clothes, take your lip ring out and cover your tattoos. She is a shit tier cunt and will probably act enraged and emotional and shit and she won't seem credible compared to you, especially if you admit to punching her and she starts throwing rape in there.
Detective will grill her, ask her to repeat her story several times and it will come up slightly different each time because she is probably mongoloid level intelligence. They will see what is really going on.
You might spend a couple nights in county but you will probably get off on probation and community service if you are first time offender. Just again, dress nice, be polite, keep your cool and sincerely apologize.
Don't hit girls again.
>>17029340
oh one more thing... don't look poor. Find your parents or family that loves you and have them to come to be in the room with you when you meet the judge. Even if all you have is a public defender, your family there actually changes the judges perception of you.
DON'T LOOK POOR AND DON'T APPEAR LIKE NOBODY LOVES OR CARES FOR YOU!!!
>>17029333
Not really. I mean, its definitely better the having a serious record, but it doesn't mean you have a better chance of getting away with it, maybe if it was a parking violation that defense would convince a judge to go easy or let you off but for the his, I doubt it will mean much.
>>17029340
Doubt she'll want to talk to me, or be cooperative to anything that will make stuff easier on me.
>>17028987
Consider killing her. She is a bitch, she fucked you over, and is now threatening to attempt to ruin your life, and even though the legal system says that rape has to be absolutely 100% proven given how FUBAR our courts are and how much they always side with women, I wouldn't bet on it.
Bring her all of her stuff and offer her like 1000 dollars to get her by for a few weeks or months or something, in exchange for her agreeing to fuck off, and in exchange for saying on video that you never raped her or hurt her.
If she won't agree, well its your call man.
Also just to let you know, if convicted for rape you could easily get 20 years, and that's not counting punching her.
>>17028987
Use your best discretion.
Ok. So I looked up the laws for assault.
For a punch, without any instrument, that causes wounds or bruising, but no lasting injury, the maximum prison sentence is 6 months. Generally just heavy fines.
So that's something, at least.
>>17029413
Faggot any jail/prison time is unacceptable, and do you know what happens if you go in for anything related to violence against a women, rape especially? Its either solitary confinement the entire time away from the other prisoners or its getting beaten to a pulp (possibly to death) by the prisoners, because somehow they always manage to find out what your crime was and for some reason they despise violence and rape against women with a passion.
Again see here >>17029368
>>17029372
Outside of law, I honestly don't think you did any wrong. Bitch cheated on you, taunted you over it, wouldn't leave when your apartment when asked while you were clearly angry and agitated over the situation. She was clearly asking for it.
>>17029419
>Faggot any jail/prison time is unacceptable
Yeah. It was the "generally just fines" part I was hoping for,
>>17029419
Yeah which is why they keep minor shitlords like you out of the drug bin
>>17029413
And when this poor faggot cant pay the fines they will basically throw him in jail anyway to serve his time.
Fines are for middle class people and for kids that have middle class parents that love them to stay out of jail.
>>17029436
See above.
>>17029419
Don't listen to this nigger. He is exaggerating to scare you.
County isn't THAT bad. Don't talk about what you did. Be casual but stern. Mind your business, stay out of trouble. At least half the people in there are for a short sentence or for just a few days until they transfer. None of these people want to cause or get involved in any more trouble than they are already in. Stick with these people and short timers, stay away from people in it for the long haul. Been in county for 2 months, never got in so much as a fight. It was scary as fuck though I admit.
>>17029445
?
>>17029452
You fucking people don't get it, he is facing years and years, possibly TWO DECADES OVER THIS SHIT
Try to negotiate with her to get out of this, if she wont yield then run away or you know.
my friend was in county for like 1.5 years(in oregon) for armed robbery and he's pretty tough, he didn't get raped but he got in ALOT of fights...
>>17028987
after you told her to leave and she did not, she became a trespasser in the eyes of the law. if shit gets real, lawyer up. you may yet get out of this.
>>17029516
Yeah. That's what I thought, but others say that since she regularly slept here it doesn't count.
>>17028987
Nice anger control, dumbass.
>>17029533
No. She's not on the lease so she has no legal right to refuse to leave or to stay there. She was a trespasser and you were protecting your rights and defending yourself from someone who was trespassing where you live. You're fine.
She isn't on the lease and she refused to leave. The only real problem is that you didn't call the police. But still, just because she's a woman doesn't make her immune to law or the fact that she can't refuse to leave someone else's home.
>>17029580
Also, if this ever happens in the future, call the police immediately after it happens and explain it to them. If you know you haven't done anything wrong and there's something that can involve you with the police, call them immediately and let them know as a rule of thumb.
I had a woman I lived with call the cops on me saying that I had beat her up. Cops showed up like two minutes after I got home. She was locked in bedroom and had hit herself in head with a board. Blood everywhere. Long story short, I SENT HER ASS to the state penitentiary. Never seen her since. But I never hit her. Good luck OP.
>>17029533
If she doesn't pay rent then she's a trespasser no matter how many times you had her previously, the moment she cheated on you and you told her to get out, you revoked an implied right of access.
Also keep us updated OP, I'm going to sleep now but I'd like to know what came of this.
>>17029604
Even if she pays rent, she is still a trespasser. So long as her name is not legally on the lease, she has no legal right to refuse to leave, even if she pays rent to you or to the landlord. The lease is all that matters.
>>17029580
You aren't right, as much as you should be. By staying and leaving possessions she is a tenant, you can't just evicted and refuse to allow a person to collect property someone once they've established tenancy. If she had called the cops she would have been allowed back in. Look up "self help evictions" and other eviction laws.
You can't just tell people to leave outta nowhere after you've let them stay for a certain amount of time.
>>17029616
Right, well I think if it comes down to having to defend his actions, he needs to state that she was showing threatening behavior by not leaving and that her body language was threatening as well so that he performed a preemptive strike.
It would help if he looked weak or is short.
>>17029616
You can't just declare "trespassing!!!" after you've let someone stay over long term. That just isn't how it works.
>>17029648
He's a boxer and she is a women. This plea will make him appear guilty and like he is trying to cover a bigger lie.
I know I am being a negative navy here, but I really am trying to help OP. You have been fucked over by shitty laws and shitty medical help.
>>17029638
Not him but she has her own place with an entirely different lease, also the items that were at his apartment is something you could find in a small shopping bag, surely that would account for something?
>>17029657
The law doesn't make distinctions, which is one of my fundamental problems with it. It should make a difference, but it doesn't.
>>17029666
Actually, now that ive had a think, slightly disregard this. Her having her own lease elsewhere may vary well make a difference depending on your state. I doubt it will, you can have tenant status at multiple places, but her having an independent lease as opposed to a shared apartment or living with relatives might make a difference.
>>17029650
You absolutely can. You never made any agreements that they can stay long term, declared them tenants, or told them they lived there. I let guests stay at my house all the time, often for days. If I tell them to get out, I can tell them to pack their shit and get out. There is a difference between yelling "trespassing!" and pulling out the AA12, and telling someone to leave and have them refuse.
In fact, it's usually against most leases (though it depends on the lease) to have tenants who are considered permanent to live there. So, as far as the landlord is concerned, she doesn't live there.
Furthermore, in his best interest and the landlord's best interest, he has absolute right to kick her out when she wants, because, she can't just DECLARE herself a tenant because she put her stuff in his apartment. HE'S liable for rent, damages, and a LONG list of horribles, and she can't refuse to vacate because she doesn't feel like it. Again, the whole point of a lease is to declare responsibility of the apartment. When you aren't on a lease, you don't have legal withstanding. He doesn't own the apartment, so she can't just CALL herself a tenant by merely settling down.
The law is on his side, believe it or not. Again, the punching part wasn't the best course of action, but if he can explain how it was necessary to protect his rights as the sole, legal tenant, he's fine. Again. That's not how tenancy works.
Almost every lease agreement is strict about "rogue tenants" and people staying when they aren't on the lease itself. It's in everyone's benefit for him to take action in enforcing his decision.
OP, you should first check your lease and see what it says regarding people living there who aren't on the lease. Use that to your advantage.
Second, make it clear that as the ONLY legal tenant of the two of you, you have the right to kick her out. You don't live somewhere unless you have a legal, mutual agreement stating you live there.
>>17029697
Oh shes absolutely an illegal resident. But even thougb she's an illegal tenant, she has certain rights. Also, only a landlord can legally throw someone out, having only your name on the lease does not give you that right. And even as landlord, there are certain rules that must be followed. You cant just yell and tell someone to leave because you are mad. It isn't that simple, eviction law is complex.
>>17029697
Also, you can't claim to have punched someone who you've allows to stay previously and claim it was out of "enforcing the agreement". It was out of reaction to a set situation, and they have a set of more laws for that. Because they suck and make money off prisoners.
>>17029735
While this may be true that he punched her because he was mad, that doesn't mean he can't have a case in court. It's his job to prove that:
a) it's still her fault
b) that his actions were justified or necessary
c) it wasn't assault or intended to be assault, but just a way to try enforce her to leave
One thing he can say in defense is that if she didn't refuse to leave and took him seriously, he would've never had any reason to get physical or have to physically make her leave.
Another thing is that he can just tell the truth. The whole point of law is to be reasonable about scenarios. The best case scenario is that she accuses him of rape and a lot of other shit so her credibility is lost. That's part of why you should immediately call the cops and tell the whole story, in and out. Absolute credibility trumps possible innocence in court. He'll still get reprimanded, but if he can convince the judge that this wasn't an act of belligerent assault and actual act of self-defense (not limited to physical self-defense), albeit a brash and violent one, he can still get away practically scratchless, even if declared guilty.
>>17029723
Eviction is a different thing altogether though. Eviction is TERMINATION of legal lease and legal residency.
She is ONLY welcome into that place because he allows it. For instance, a person can't just break into a house and set up shop and say they live there and are gonna' leave when they feel like it. Of course, that isn't the case because he let her in. But, that's precisely WHY he has power in this case. He let her in, and she has to respect his wishes when she's been told to leave.
Ok. OP here.
I'll go to bed now, try to catch a few hours of sleep. In the morning I'll dress up well, go over to the ex' place, and give her her stuff.
If she wants to go to the cops about this, I'll go with her and turn myself in.
If I do this I hope I'll get a sentence on the more lenient side (fines rather than prison). And I think she'll have a hard time claiming I raped her if I go along with this peacefully.
I'll keep y'all updated.
>>17029787
Don't wait for her to report it. Take this to the cops yourself. Again, you didn't actively go and try to attack her. Take this to the cops and tell the story. Again, you're mostly in the right here, aside from punching her instead of calling the police. But you can argue your name clear.
Take this to the police. Don't give people a reason to be suspicious.
You're a fucking retard. I hope she calls the cops on you.
>>17029783
>The whole point of law is to be reasonable about scenarios
WHEW LAD
>>17029783
True a person can't just break in and set up shop, if they do you can remove them.
You invite that same person in, let them set up shop, well then you have to follow certain laws to make them leave.
She refused to leave because she had established tenancy and had possessions she was legally allowed to claim before being removed, even if she was never legally allowed to leave those things in the first place. You can't respond to that with force, you can't even throw her out because you aren't the landlord.
I wish your right, and your first post has some good nuggets of wisdom, but I'm still pretty dang sure the law is against him. I would seriously consider cutting ties and leaving town, your plan has a lot if coming off it, and really on getting a good judge/public defender. It doesn't sound like he can afford a good lawyer.
>>17029809
I'd suggest taking business law and some elementary law classes, because you'll quickly learn that law is very much balanced. The law helps more people than it fucks over, and that's just because no one can ever create a legal system that helps everyone and everything. Honestly, the current legal system is fantastic. It's really hard to accommodate more than it already is, because a lot of it begins to just ride on subjectivity and extreme specifics that could never be covered by law for an entire country.
>>17029811
You can't establish tenancy by just staying somewhere. Thankfully, tenancy has actual legal meaning and can't just be...thrown around (for lack of a better word) with no grounds. That's the thing. Living somewhere is different from tenancy.
Although her things are in the house, that still doesn't mean she can stay. You still have immediate right to kick her out and throw her things on the sidewalk afterwards. If you were to actually try to steal or keep her things, that would be different. You DO have the right to kick someone out who's just freeloading, so long as you don't take anything that's not yours nor do you have intention to do anything criminal, whether it be assault or theft. Your rights supersede hers because your rights have more consequences, involve more parties, and the violation of YOUR rights led to the violation of hers.
She can try to sue you if she can prove that you kicking her out and not giving all her stuff immediately affected her life's quality in a major way, but that'll most likely be shot down by a court considering the circumstances.
Do not go to the police or talk to the police without a lawyer.
Don't drop the soap senpai, may as well move city while you're at it because no girl in your immediate circle is gonna fuck you.
>>17029154
A few days ago means she probably hasn't involved the Police. They would have been knocking on your door within hours for domestic violence or assault. She can still lodge a complaint but they won't be there so quickly because she's not there now (so she's safe).
Send your ex-gf a text telling her ther stuff will be put outside the door at xx o'clock on xx day and do it.
She's not interested in fixing things - she'd have been in touch by now - instead she's gone back to her ex.
Don't waste energy on her. If you want her gone asap dump her stuff outside her apartment door and text her it's there. Then don't speak to her again.
>>17028987
Technically, if she isn't on the lease, and you told her to leave your apartment, you may have a case for self defense or something like that.
A good lawyer could probably help you out.
Or you could just talk to her and say you're sorry.
Generally, though, you really shouldn't listen to /b/.
>>17029368
>>17029368
>Bring her all of her stuff and offer her like 1000 dollars to get her by for a few weeks or months or something, in exchange for her agreeing to fuck off, and in exchange for saying on video that you never raped her or hurt her
Holy shit you're autistic.
OP, if you didn't rape her, you don't have to worry about that. You did, however, punch her in the face. Which you may have to worry about. But chances are, unless you've already got a record, the worst you'll get is a fine and some serious probation for that.
>>17030164
I should ask, though, are you in college?
If yes, then you may have a problem. While the law still operates on 'innocent until proven guilty', many campuses have stricter sexual assault guidelines. In other words, if she does cry rape, you won't get in any legal trouble (because she would need actual evidence. and a rape kit done two days after regular sex will not work), you could be expelled.
OP here.
Thankfully, things will turn out ok.
I went over to my ex' place with her stuff, and we talked it out.
I apologized for punching her, she apologized for sleeping around. We both admitted we acted like jerks.
I still feel like a complete idiot, but at least the police didn't get involved.
>>17028987
>how she was going to call the police and say I had raped her
>she had been sleeping with her ex the other nights
he fell for the vagina jew. the women of today are the modern day niggers and this is what you get for forming relationships with them.
>>17029413
Also kiss away your 2nd amendment rights, and good luck finding a job with an assault on your record.
It will also make it very very hard to find an apartment in the future.
