Basically my ex-gf had BPD, she broke up with me for still unknown reasons, at the time it really hurt me and it took me a bit to move along but now im completely over her and i even think to myself wtf did i saw on her.
Anyways out of curiosity i wanted to know how big was the bullet that i ended up dodging. i heard a few stories about BPD people and how crazy they can be especially women but i want to know a few more so pls anyone with stories about people with this disorders would really apreciate to read about it.
Thanks.
>>17025191
I dated a female who had that issue. We were together for about 8 months. Anyways, about a week before my B-day she made all these plans she had planned out for my b-day and even after, seeing how my b-day falls basically on new years. I treated her well, took her to Dr. appointments when I had time, even made time. 2 days before my b-day, things were going great. We went to a park, holding hands, walking around the lake and watched the sunset.
The night before my b-day she calls and says she's not feeling well(the classic bullshit), so we'd just go out to dinner. Anyways, she was cold and acting off that night, we come back to my place and as we're lying on the bed watching T.V. she broke up with me, on my birthday.
You dodged a bullet.
Op here. thats actually really funny. same thing with this girl only dated her for about 3 months she was the one who actually was interested first on me even asked my number anwyays i treated her super well just like you, i went to places with her even re-schedule other things i had to do to be with her and even went to her to her doctor appointments only to have her tell me that she didnt loved me anymore. imao i guess people with that mental issue are really something special. anyways thanks for your storie man appreciated
>>17025191
Honestly, BPD is just adult who never grew the fuck up disorder.
I also happened to know a girl who was diagnosed with it along with depression. The "black and white" thinking with them is beyond ridiculous, she would always lie about how you could be totally open with her but if you ever said anything she didn't like she'd go full asspain mode and say "lol im blocking you on social media bye" or some other passive aggressive bullshit.
She was also a massive hypocrite and would get angry at people for liking something but when she liked it that makes it okay. Likewise if you did something she didn't like but it was okay if she did it.
From what I hear a lot of the feminist/sjw types tend to have this disorder, which makes sense when you think about it because it would take that kind of person to continually deny the facts put in front of them for the sake of saying what will get them the most attention.
Anyways, you dodged quite the bullet there.
Pic somewhat related, this is the kind of special snowflake crap women with BPD will spout because they think they're "not like other girls" in the sense that what they think women are, due to their warped view of people around them and themselves, is not a realistic perspective on how women actually are. Also apparently decent standard hygiene is unfathomable.
>ex-girlfriend and i dated for three months
>in the beginning we would hang out 8-12 hours a day every day, text her when i'm not with her
>still not enough
>she's moody and sad all the time because i'm not giving her enough attention somehow
>towards the end she starts giving one word answers to everything i say
>literally impossible to take a conversation past "not much, you?"
>don't talk to her at all for one day
>she absolutely flips on me for "ignoring her" when all i did was stop showering her with attention
>leaves me for some red-headed girl
She hasn't had a relationship since me last more than two weeks, and she's still dating 18-19 year olds because they're only ones who can match her immaturity. I'm very glad I'm not as fucked up as she is.
interesting. now that i think about she was indeed a massive hyprocite. i remember one of the first talks with her being about her not being the type of girl that goes to clubs and doesnt literally fuck around with a bunch of dudes at once, or in other cases being a whore but then several times when i was with her and this hapenned more when we were together with her friends she was super sexual in the sense that she wouldnt stop talking about it and saying all the time how she wouldnt fucking that random dude over there because he looked cute. like wtf how can you be in a relantionship and constantly talk to your partner in front of other people as well how you want to fuck other guys and girls too!! thats right i found out later that she was bissexual. So much for not being a very sexual person ahaha.
Now that i think about it there were alot of red flags about her that i noticed but totaly ignored ahaha (must have the been the chemicals on my brain).
Jesus christ guess i really dodged a bullet there huh.
btw is it true when i hear most people say that most of these girls future isnt really that bright?
heard alot of people say that most BPD are the ones that end up alone and abandoned in mental health facilities...
I had a GF who wasn't diagnosed but sure as shit had every symptom. I loved her completely but it was so hard to be "with" her. She would have wild mood swings from ecstatic to literally suicidal, and there was nothing I could do to help her. I finally had to let her go for my own sanity.
I looked her up on a whim a few years later and she was still posting depressed, miserable stuff regularly. I feel like I dodged a bullet but I still miss her to this day.
I knew one girl with BPD. We had a fling I guess you could say, for a few weeks. She was extremely crazy. EXTREMELY. Cried all the time, cut all the time, took 500 meds, etc. I wish her the best, but I would just be unable to take care of someone like that.
>>17025461
She also had a very, very fucked up life. Poor girl.
>>17025468
Post her tits
op here
hm...why do you miss her so much? what does she have of so special?
also since being with her have you been in any other relantionship yet?
we often put more worth on people that in reality they have especially when its about though breakups. i know i put her on a fucking pedestal when she broke up with me and only after a while did i began to actually racionalize about what this girl really was...
>>17025391
>btw is it true when i hear most people say that most of these girls future isnt really that bright?
It's true. Unfortunately, like others in the cluster-B family (psychopaths, narcissists, histrionics, sadists, etc) they don't believe that they have a problem and don't seek treatment until they no longer have anyone to fuck over, many of them are basically forced into it after losing their job, abusing their spouses/partners, alienating their family, exploiting their friends, etc to the point where everyone has heard of them and their reputation and nobody will fall for it anymore.
>>17025444
Note that bipolar and BPD are different things. Both have mood swings, but borderline is much more than that, and much worse.
>>17025361
Yep, and I can see how you fell for that too since nowadays media tries to promote women becoming sluts, even though everything she promised is what my folks would call "being a respectable human being".
Infatuation can be very blinding. We see what we want to see but when reality hits, it hits hard.
>>17025391
I'd believe it, and it's not even in a pitiable way. They're the ones that put themselves there and violently shoo away loved ones.
It's better to just avoid people like that and move on, accepting that it was a bullet dodged.
>>17025491
this is what i want to know in more detail. how bad is BPD really? like what kinda extreme behaviour can you expect from people who suffer from this?
>>17025495
i must also say that she was my first gf ever. hell before she showed up i didnt even had any intention of getting a gf soon cause i wanted to improve in several aspects first and also i never really felt the need.
>>17025498
Basically, most of the "psycho girlfriend" stories you've heard that involve severe abuse of the partner are cases of BPD (it's far-and-away the most common cause of such behavior among women, among whom cluster-A disorders are far rarer).
Here's an example (from an /adv/ post):
>I spent 5 years with a girl who slashed herself if she didn't get her way, if I didn't get to her house on time, if the chinky delivery missed something from her order
>anything she could be upset about resulted in her cutting herself or attacking someone else (usually me or her mother).
>a few months in she started bruising herself, round kicking door frames and throwing herself down stairs
>she would say it was an accident, I thought nothing of it.
>Then she started attacking me
>she would punch me for not noticing that she got out of bed to piss in the middle of the night
>she would grab me by the balls, she would sock me in the stomach if I disagreed with her
>then she would cry, I'd hide the scissors, then she would cry more, apologise and make things up to me
>I'd get to fuck her throat, her ass, anything I wanted, she would have a smile on her face the whole time.
>One day she tried stabbing me because I had to go to a dentist's appointment
>I ran out of the back door and jumped the fence
>as I walked down the road, she pulled up along side me crying, she had slashed her arms and came looking for me
>I was helpless, I had to drive her home, bandage her arms, I missed my appointment
>she apologised, I got a blowjob, she cuddled me all day and watched me play video games.
>The killing blow was when she showed up at my work xmas do and accused every woman there of sleeping with me
>she wasn't invited, she knew nobody, but somehow she knew every woman's name, even the ones I didn't know.
>the police arrived, her mother arrived, I broke up with her because I was sick of the drama
>she got sectioned
>>17026309
Holy...thats some messed up shit...i find it interesting how she would try to solve everything with sexual favours lol.
Now that i remember one of the last things i found out about that girl was that she had pretty much done every type of sexual activity with her ex-bf as opposed to just the "regular sex" she initially told me about. Anal, bdsm, blowjobs, letting him cum anywhere, she even filmed the sex various times...imao so much for not being a very sexual person...anyways thanks for your story man really apreciated.
And to think im a guy who doesnt really arguments and is very calm, definitly wouldnt get along with her in the long run...
My sister had this and her life was a complete mess. She recently started intense therapy and now she has a kid and is gettting married. I think she recovered or is recovering because she is intelligent enough to realise she had a problem.
I kind of had a friend with bpd. We roleplayed on tumblr together. Her character...wasn’t that popular and imo was a serious mary sue (member of an oppressed class, personality nice and sweet and perfect in every way, the whole nine yards)
The problem came when she didn't get enough attention on her character, which was often. See, the character was a self insert, so after she'd go a day without having someone to reply to, she would always write these posts on how awful it was that everyone was ignoring her, cryTy pi Ng l i ke there wAs n o tom oRro w.
Completely ignoring the fact that she wasn't really starting interactions with other roleplayers. She often just reblogged memes and shit when not replying. It was irritating and it got even worse with some anonymous account started hassling her ic/ooc. Although I have a sneaking suspicion that some of it was her doing it for attention. Anyway, things came to a head one day when the anon pushed her too far and she was all "I'm gonna kill myself"
(Like, over a rp character? Seriously?)
But anyway that naturally got everyone's attention and people were able to convince her not to. That's when i started looking into bpd myself and found out she fit like 5 out of 8 of the categories or whatever. I told her to get herself checked out and she came back with a positive diagnosis.
Later on though, i just lost interest in rping so i drifted out of touch with her.
>>17026474
This girl also has weekly theraphy sessions and takes a bunch of meds each day to keep her in check.
I remember one day she forgot to take them and her speech completely changed from a "normal" person to talking about killing herself, cutting herself, making a bunch of crazy stuff and other similar things. She was also incredibly stressed out and was having panic and anxiety attacks. Some scary stuff.
>>17026481
Yea can confirm. By the end of my experience with her i came to the conclusion that people with BPD in general are pretty much attention whores and if they dont get the attention that they crave they explode and do a bunch of crazy stuff.
Its funny because she told me she didnt like her appearance at all yet all the fucking time she would be posting shit on her social media( tumblr, instagram, facebook) and the funniest thing is more than often it would be pictures of her. So much for insecurity lol.
Oh god now that i think about it she was such a bullshitter...
I'm a guy, and I have BPD. It is inexcusable to inflict on someone else, i will never argue that it isn't. Doing what we can do to other people is disgusting, and there is no and will never be an excuse, but its far from just not being mature, or any easily solved or fixed problem. It can't really be fixed. And it usually comes with a host of other issues like anxiety and chronic depression to boot.
Part of why a lot of people never get diagnosed or seek help, well its a long list. BPD is very hard to diagnose clinically, and only recently have they made strides in that department, and they will still misdiagnose BPD as other things and fuck the person up worse in doing so very often. But most never seek treatment because, a large number of people don't have the self awareness to realize their issues and actualize on seeking help, or theyre too poor, or too far gone.
The best they can do is HEAVILY medicate, and teach your medicated self to pretend to be normal and functioning, it never really stops. You always have to live with it, to fight it, every step of the way.
My life is a literal hell. What i go through will never excuse the things i have done, or could do if i dont keep myself in check.
>>17026521
Field too long.
Cont'd. Below.
>>17026507
Not true, funnily enough. We only seek attention insofar as 'loved ones' or people i guess youd call precious or something, and its generally due to an extremely overdriven sense of abandonment. When you leave, its like you're gone forever, to try to explain it as best as I can. Its not the attention, its just an inability to emotionally understand that leaving doesnt mean gone forever, among many other things. All emotions are their extremes. All the time. If we're feeling anything we're feeling it at its worst.
That doesnt excuse it, but it really doesnt help when people who dont understand an issue speak about it as if they know what it is. If you have questions, i'll stick around to try to explain. I'd rather people know the truth than drummed up horseshit that makes it sound voluntary or marginal.
>>17025491
Eh, no. Borderline is not worse than bipolar. I've known people with both. They're different, but if either is worse, it's bipolar disorder.
Something that I feel must be mentioned is that BPD comes in a lot of different gradations. Just as you have minor depression, major depression (aka moderate depression) and severe major depression, some people are able to live at least somewhat fulfilling lives despite their illness, while others are institutionalized ten times a year.
>>17026521
>HEAVILY medicate
Is that what they do in the US? All professionals I've seen that were specialized in personality disorders claimed that for BPD, the less medication, the better. I'm personally only on three meds.
>>17025191
i was in a relationship with a girl like for about 2 months. we where friends for a year prior to the relationship. She was really obsessed with beliefs that rooted from the new age movement. When i got into a relationship with her, i found out a lot of really crazy shit about her that i never previously knew. for example she took her kids out of school because she thought the world was going to change. she was basically unintentionally abusive to her children. anyway, the relationship came to an end because she cheated on me with her ex abusive husband.
>>17026525
Sorry if my statements offended you, wasnt my intention at all.
I do know that people who suffer from BPD only feel in extremes and have thst fear of their loved ones leaving them.
But what hapenned here and its what left me confused is despite feeling that and aparently me being really important tp her she was the one who pushed me away and the worst thing is that it was completely out of nowhere.
I mean the day before she broke up with me she was making plans so i met her family, then out of nowhere she realized she didnt loved me anymore and she broke up with me BY TEXT. She wasnt even mature enough to do it in person. I mean how do you stop loving someone literally day over night and when the person didnt do anything wrong to you?
>>17026546
Yeah, I dont know if its changed. I havent had the money to pay for any treatments in a long time. But when i last did, it was just alot of high dose meds and DBT.
I wish I had the money to go again, my life was actually liveable to a small degree.
>>17026552
Im not offended so no worries, I just dont want to see anyone hurt because they think its less serious than it is and dont understand how vile it is. Its vile, insidious, and not to be fucked around with. Physical and emotional abuse is way too common, and when you confront or admonish, they only get MUCH worse. Its dangerous and it'll get someone hurt, and I dont want that.
>>17026548
Yea...im not gonna say this is a behaviour related to BPD as i see alot of women doing this especially younger ones where they seem to go back to an abusive ex or even husband.
About a month and a half after she broke up with me i found out that she tried to get with a guy that prettt much manipulated her into giving him a handjob and then told her to fuck off. She was "with him" for a week lol...
>>17026555
Thanks for the reply but think you can tell me why do you think she suddently stopped loving me in like a heartbeat. I know no one can really know except her but maybe you have an idea that explains her behaviour. I must mention that she refused to give me any type of explanation when i asked for it.
>>17026569
That'd be because she doesnt really know would be my bet. As someone said above, its in black and white, with little and very tenuous middle ground. And extreme impulsive behavior is one of the main diagnostic symptoms.
Im a much worse case in some aspects, so i can only guess. You did something that, regardless of if it was bad or meant anything at all(not your fault 99.9% of the time), made her opinion flip, and that was the end of it.
Its not particularly uncommon, but usually they end up coming back in tears or upset or what have you later when the switch flips back, and theyre alone and all that.
Hey OP, you want stories? I got em.
My first real GF had BPD. We dated for about 2 years.
What most people here are saying is true, but each experience is unique. I didn't find out she actually had BPD until a few months before the relationship ended, when she was formally diagnosed. I actually came to this very board about 4 years ago asking for help to indentify what the hell is wrong with my girlfriend.
Within minutes, it was flooded with BPD. I soaked up every bit of information I could on the disorder, including websites and help resources for people who are involved with/know someone with BPD to cope and overcome the trauma. It was like after these 2 years of feeling isolated and trapped, I had hope again.
BPD is a very mentally exhausting and draining disorder. It affects everyone around the person diagnosed so badly that people either become indifferent, dissociated or nervous emotional wrecks. I was probably a combination of the three throughout the course of the relationship.
When she was normal, it was great. We had a lot in common, she loved me and was super affectionate all the time, she would make me things, we had lots of great, passionate bareback sex and life was pretty good. But, in all honesty, I was naive and it was my first relationship, so it probably seemed so great in comparison to nothing.
Continued from >>17026588
Few examples of what I dealt with during the two years.
>Would lose her shit over something like being killed in a video game by accident when we were on a team and get angry
>Carried on flirting with 50+ other men on various messaging services while claiming not to like attention (I caught her cheating/attempting to cheat)
>Drove to meet someone 2 hours away from her, who took a train ride from Chicago to come meet her (she lived in Missouri at the time) and didn’t tell me about it, never knew if she cheated or not but it’s a safe bet
>Her family literally trying to play nice and friendly with me, in the hopes I would get stuck with her and get her out of their lives (her mother knew about her daughter’s meet with the man, and I fucking flipped on her for that too)
>Constantly getting jealous when I would talk to other people or spend time with friends
>Always wanted to Skype when we weren’t together for hours on end, usually through the night as we slept as well
>Didn’t have any friends and made me feel bad for having any
>Ruined by 21st birthday by having one of her episodes, losing her shit in public and snapping on me in front of a lot of friends/family
>Stalked and harassed me on the internet endlessly after I broke off all contact with her and threatening legal action and a restraining order
And a lot of other shit I don’t care to remember because it was a painful 2 years. This barely even begins to scratch the surface, it's what I can remember off the top of my head.
>>17026577
Interesting. Thanks for the answer. I dont really know what i did but part of the reason why i asked her for an explanation was so that we could maybe figure a solution for whatever issue she saw was a problem...i mean thats what adults do i think, they try to fix their problems and work on a solution.
As far as she coming back i dont know if that will ever happen, its been over 3 months and from what i know she seems ok. Sadly she probably found some other person to be with her. I mean thats ok she has the right to move on but i just hope she doesnt end up hurting herself or someone else...
>>17026590
Damn...thats so scary im sad that you had to go through that but thanks for sharing...
One of the things really stands out to me though is the cheating...i heard about it alot they say they love you show you affection but then go on to cheat sometimes multiple times and with diferent people...really insane how they dont realize something so basic that cheating is not normal and hurts the person you love so much...
>>17026597
I'm drunk enough to get some sleep for now, so I'm sorry but im gonna bow out. But I'll say this.
BPD is its own monster.
I've lived with a pretty shit case of it most of my life. Don't blame yourself for what 'we' do, don't take the abuse we dish out. But don't demonize or vilify either. Trust me when I say, if they're anything like me they punish themselves enough without any outside help. Just do what you have to for yourself, cut ties, walk away, whatever. Making a spectacle of a living hell and telling stories though? That doesn't help anyone, and does a great deal of harm. Keep em to yourself.
You aren't obligated to let someone hurt you like that, especially someone you cant help. But you aren't justified to make an already shitty life that much worse in spite. That said, I hope you have a good day, and I hope things go better for you.
>>17026590
My bf freaked out at xmas with my folks and said he needed to take my car and go home. When I said no just relaz he called 911 on himself and told them he was dangerous and "tocome with guns drawn"
Is that BPD?
His dad has bipolar disorder but I have never met his dad.
Continued from >>17026590
The last straw was when she came to visit with her family and I took her and her sister to Disney World for a day. After I dropped her sister off for the evening, my girlfriend was still asleep in the front seat from the long carride back. It was night, and my phone buzzed in the cupholder. At a stop light, I picked it up and looked at the message, to which it read "Hey sexy, I miss you, how have you been doing? :)"
It was at this moment I realized this wasn't my phone. I then started looking through her messages and she was talking to other men, SOMEHOW (without either me or her sister seeing), all day, while we were together. I was about to kill her if I didn't get out of the car and scream at the top of my lungs. It was like something out of a movie, I was right next to the shore, and screamed with a furious, primal roar out to the ocean. That is when I truly snapped. She woke up from the car and just saw me standing in the distance with my back facing the car, looking out at the ocean. She just casually walked up and said “What’s wrong?” in a somewhat innocent, Disney-like, concerned cartoon voice. I just let her have it, showed her the phone, and started making a list, then proceeded to through her phone to the ground, destroy it, and throw it into the ocean.
Continued from >>17026650
I was filled with such hate. She was very upset and not in the “triggered” BPD kind of way. She was crying, I didn’t care. It was the boy who cried wolf and I seriously felt nothing watching her cry. I was already at that point for a while before, but it was more malicious feeling inside of me this time. She begged and pleaded for me not to leave her. I let my emotions get the better of me and this turned into a power trip. I did things I regretted afterward. I did disgusting things to her when we got home. I told her if you expect me to stay with you after this, you’re going to start doing exactly as I say. I made her get on her knees and have her repeat “I’m a dirty slut that needs to be punished” and words to that effect, stuck my dick in her face and made her watch as I ejaculated all over it. I smacked my dick against her face afterward, telling her to clean it with her mouth, and she did with tears rolling down her face. I then proceeded to fuck and abuse her body mercilessly for 2 hours, finishing either on her face or inside and not letting her clean herself at all, while I called her every despicable name and word you can think of for the duration. It was this horrific emotional release, that I still have no idea how I was capable of something so out of character for me. It was vicious, and it scared me
When she went back with her family, I broke up with her, which is it’s own story that I’ll tell if anyone wants to know. Moral is, you’re dodging a bullet avoiding someone with BPD. Do not make the same mistakes me and others have, learn something from these stories. They’re not jokes, it can ruin your life
Also >mfw leaving her
>>17026625
Thanks for all the help. And as far as me going around and telling shit about her dont worry i would never do that. I have no interest in hurting her or in revenge or some shit like that all i ever wanted from her was some type of closure but its ok i get it that sometimes in life you really cant understand everything.
But like i said im pretty sure i alredy moved on i dont feel anything for her anymore. Just wanted to educate myself more about this subject. Hope you have a good night of sleep and once again thanks for the help
>>17026634
That could be anything, I would need more information about his behavior. What other strange things has he done in a similar vain? BPD is very identifiable if you know what to look for
>>17026654
Holy fucking shit. Thats some messed up story. Yep definitly not for me, i hate lies arguments and screaming in general. Cannot see myself in a relationship like that at all. Godammn not to seem like an asshole but it seems like i dodged a bullet the size of the fucking moon lol
>>17026654
Btw just out of curiosity how old were you and her when this hapenned?
>>17026671
We were 21 or 22 I believe, and yeah dude, I don't know the extent of your experience from BPD, but it's scary thinking back what you ever saw in the other person when you think of all the awful parts
>>17026682
She was my first gf lol.
I dont know honestly she didnt caught my eye when i first saw her it was the other way around she was the one who asked for my number and was interested. To be honest i started talking to her out of sympathy and before i knew it she was talking about me asking her officially to date her lol. I guess that was one of the reasons why her breaking up didnt made sense to me since she was the one originally interested but whatever reading all of this and recognizing the red flags on her behaviour made me lose any interest that i might had of a relantionship with her. Thanks alot for sharing your experience.
>>17026698
Yeah dude, same, first GF too. Once you escape it's great and life gets better. Be glad you got out, glad to have shared and hope my stories help others here
>>17026737
Definitly am glad that i got out. Can only imagine the shit that i eventually would get through by staying with her.
And yea life does get better. She actually gave me alot of motivation after she broke up with me to change my life.
I decided that i was gonna stop making excuses and go after the things i want in my life.
Now im making so much progress. Im alredy gaining weight, just joined a gym, im finishing my drivers license and i know that if i keep working hard and focus on what i want its just a matter of time until i reach my goals.
Once again thanks for sharing and hope everything goes well for you.
>>17026654
Terrifying, and hot. Can't tell if she liked it or not
>>17026850
lol probably liked it since they are so fucked up in the head...
>>17026542
> I've known people with both. They're different, but if either is worse, it's bipolar disorder.
Really? Storytime?
Generally i think most people would say BPD is "worse" because of 3 big things:
>No highly-effective medication
>Resistance to professional help
>Directly hurting others (friends, family, partner)
But it'd be interesting to hear your personal experiences with this.
Possibly off topic, but Is it better or worse to be a dude with BPD or a female with BPD?
>>17027051
Neither. More common among females (don't remember exactly how much is considered social vs biological, but like all disorders with severe social malfunction it's bound to be widely different among cultures).
afaik severity is the same in both genders.
>>17027051
Dude, at least if you're not diagnosed. BPD is often not recognized in dudes which leads to misdiagnosis.
This girl and I was talking to is being diagnosed for BPD, but she's not as severe as these stories. We live in different countries so we weren't dating but we did have feeling for eachother. This sort of ended yesterday, I don't know if these stories are relieving or not. I've got bipolar II and blew up at her and feel like shit because of it. Someone please tell me that it's better this way
>>17027468
Its absolutely for the better, i know people with bipolar disorder and people with bpd. It was dangerous for both of you and would have ended badly, no doubt.
>>17027539
But I mean, I understand what it's like to go through getting therapy and facing your demons. I feel like I'm abandoning her because of her condition, which isn't her fault. She's nowhere near some of these other girls, she just has really bad self esteem and wants to just run away at times.
Female with BPD here - institutionalized for the first time last month, now on prozac and weekly therapy/DBT. My initial diagnosis was BPD but, to my understanding, it's completely reversible with intense therapy and anger management (they think it stems from childhood trauma, like watching my father beat my mother and being molested by a neighbour).
I get really sad when I hear all of these stories about "my crazy BPD ex" because I've never done any of these things - I just feel my emotions incredibly intensely compared to most people, have intense feelings of abandonment, and occasionally 'split' my feelings.
No self harm, drug abuse in my past.
Ask me anything, I suppose.
>>17027051
Depends on your stance - most men with BPD end up in the penal system, statistically speaking, while most women end up in a mental hospital at some point.
>>17027578
You are being treated and thus are able to control it. Most "crazy BPD exes" weren't being treated at the time and I'm sure you understand how ugly things can get.
>>17027578
When you have an outburst, how much do you mean the things you say? I know that's really vague but I'm just trying to understand it better
>>17027598
My outbursts are usually manifestations of my very deeply hidden feelings/thoughts. I don't judge people to their faces, and I will tell them as much, because I understand life and shit happens, but I will always reserve my own thoughts and stances on things people do and say because it's a way for me to predict and understand them better.
For example, an ex and I got into an argument and I told him I thought he was pathetic for still being upset, months later, over his friend who died of a heroin overdose. And once I realized that I had struck a nerve like I wanted, I dug in and just said anything I could think of.
Do I mean it? Yes. I mean every single word.
Do I mean to hurt you? Yes. I do. That is my intention at the moment.
Will I feel remorse for it later? If I love you, probably.
>>17027596
I started therapy a month ago. I mean, I've had some crazy moments because of my emotions but not these 50 pills or cutting herself.
I guess it's just a mild form, I believe the disorder exists on a spectrum.
>>17027617
>And once I realized that I had struck a nerve like I wanted, I dug in and just said anything I could think of.
>Do I mean it? Yes. I mean every single word.
How soon did your rage return to baseline? Two months ago I got into a huge fight with a friend and I told her, among other things, to go kill herself and that I hoped she would cut too deep. I felt horrible as soon as my rage had subsided, especially when a couple days later she actually attempted suicide. But weeks later, as I checked her blog and read she was doing awful, I still got that hateful, triumphant feeling. Which in turn makes me feel disgusted with myself.
>>17026654
Holy shit...you're lucky she didn't bite your dick off
>>17027713
This is going to sound terrible, but I told her if she tried anything, I would beat her senseless. She didn't even say a word, she just took it. I feel awful recounting this. I made her sleep on the floor with nothing but a towel and told her she couldn't shower afterward either, then sent her back to her folks with my dried stains on her. I let her throw some water in her face to rub the makeup from her tears off, but everything else stayed.
Christ what a fucking monster I acted like...
>>17028150
Love can make us do crazy things...
>>17028270
>implying love is real
My BDP ex was crazy. I won't forgive the things she did because she knew they were awful and wrong. She could have exercised more control but didn't. I got so tired of the excuses and her blaming everyone else for her lying and cheating. It was a living hell which made me depressed and ill. Thank god I got out and ignored her thereafter. She got pregnant with someone else and wanted me to raise with her pretending it was mine. What a nut job. Everyone should avoid friendships or relationships with them, hell I woukdnt knowingly employ one in case they go mad and do crazy.
>>17027578
Can you elaborate on what splitting your feelings means?
I have an idea that its when your feelings for a person go from extreme to another very fast usually because of that said person doing or saying something that devaluates them in your eyes but im nog sure if this correspondes to the reality
>>17025191
you have dodged one of the biggest bullets on the market. honestly, she did you a huge favor by leaving you without explanation. i dont have time to get into my own story, but suffice to say it was one of the most fucked up things ive ever experienced, the closest ive ever come to hitting a woman, and was detrimental to my outlook on relationships. i am distrustful of pretty much everyone except my immediate family to this day, and its been almost a year since the incident.
you dun good, op. focus on yourself now.
>>17028593
In all honesty im kinda distrustful of alot of people, even scared of dating right now because this just made me realize how many mentally ill people exist out there. i mean i just imagine its really worth it to get into a relantionship with a girl just to have destroy your life by doing these crazy shits.
i mean i´m reading alot of horror stories about dudes who date chicks and then have them saying shit like they raped and in turn almost having their lifes destroyed because of that.
world´s crazy man.
but regardless thanks for the reinforcement, and i will definitly focus on myself right now. I hope you too get to where you want to be.
