What the fuck do you do when you are hopelessly in love with someone who has a very low sex drive and sex happens maybe twice a month?
>4 year relationship
I've started to fantasize about other people and regularly think about cheating with a random.
Help me please.
If you've been together for 4 years, it's time to just sit down and have an honest conversation about it. Tell her that you love her, and you still want to be together, but you're not satisfied sexually and you're not sure how it's going to work in the long run. Just talk it through.
It's possible that some kind of open-relationship arrangement might be for you. Those things CAN work. But if you just bottle it up and act like things are fine, you're going to end up cheating, or resenting her unfairly, or something else. This will inevitably destroy the relationship unless you can COMMUNICATE and figure something out that works for both of you
>>17007890
Why not try to initiate it more? My friend she is asexual so in her relationships she would barely try for it but whenever the guy wanted it she would do it, maybe if you try to get her into it more it'll change
>>17007901
>>17007917
I have talked to him about this issue a lot over the years. I'm female and ashamed of wanting sex so regularly. He's told me it's off putting because now he sees me as someone who just focuses on sex. It's like the pink elephant in the room now. I feel ashamed and I'm sorry in advance that this issue is not from a male perspective.
He doesn't have a hard penis unless we heavily foreplay, I look better than ever and take care of myself. I'm very hygienic, i am supportive and honest with him but I just can't take it anymore. He told me he's always had a low libido so it's not really his fault either.
>>17007890
>try to arouse her
>try to find an arrangement
>watch porn
OR, decide whats more important to you.
You have to emasculate him. Tie him up in his sleep and peg him.
On a more seriously node, he should see a doctor his he is having a hard time getting and erection. Male sexual dysfunction is most of the time connected to some physical problem.
>>17007890
I'm in the same spot as you anon! Me and my girl has been together for about 8 years now. Have one child, so yay.... we did it like, once, it feels like.
No but to be honest, the sex part was straight from the start "Well, I don't want our relationship to just focus on the sex part", and I was like "ok..." like a fool I was.
Earlier, I had only dated younger women´s who´s whole occupation was thinking about sex. I'm not joking, sex was one of the main build blocks in all my earlier relationships, so this came as a real surprise to me.
The years passed and rarely became like... never. I'm lucky to get it of once a year, and Ill have to be throwing in a trip to a luxurious hotel and shit just to get there! I mean, what the fuck? Its not like I don't bring up the subject either, but it all ends in empty promises it seems. And I'm not a bad looking guy, I eat healthy, mind how I dress and wouldn't dream of leaving the house without fixing with shower and such.
You know how one can punish a dog for trying to eat of the cats food, you smack it enough times on the nose, and its bound to understand its no use. This is what its come to basically, I have run out of fuel by now, and has simply accepted it as it is. I bought a male Sex toy she found, and was furious about, I simply told her the truth "Its not like its stealing your job, so why so mad?".
>>17007890
Is he depressed?
Does he have any intimacy issues, ie needs his privacy and doesn't like being exposed/vulnerable?
How often does he masturbate?
For that matter, how often do you? If you're fantasizing about others and thinking about cheating, it sounds like you're not getting very much satisfaction at all.
Side note: unlike the other anons my immediate assumption was that you're female and the partner's male: better spidey sense?
Goddamn I wish my gf complained about not getting enough sex, I'd love to help her solve that problem!
I know you're pain. Gf has vaginismus and lost her sex drive. It sucks because it makes the relationship dynamic feel off, with zero intimacy outside of some hugging and kissing... feels almost like you're just really good friends or something. If he's always had a low sex drive, maybe try researching ways to increase it or go see a doctor? Kind of hard to say what might be the cause. Does he watch porn a lot, that can kill motivation for actual sex too.
Break up
>>17007953
>hard penis
Bump for interest
>>17007953
You're in a pickle, its not his fault (or so you claim). That's the hand you've been dealt. You either go with it or fold. Don't cheat.
>>17007953
Leave him.
>>17008063
cheat.
what the fuck would she expect.
>>17008063
I'm sorry you're going through this. He doesn't mind if I buy a toy but I don't find pleasure in solitary sex, I need interaction.
>>17007953
You have nothing to be ashamed of anon. You and your partner may not be compatible, unfortunately.
>>17010153
What do I say when he insists that we are compatible but we are too busy or he is too tired?
Because I feel like his tired excuse is bs, there are times where I just want to give him a bj or sexual interaction that requires nothing but him laying back, yet still he doesn't seem to want it.
I feel like he finds excuses not to engage even though I asked him for sex well in advance that day, he will tell me mid foreplay that he needs to shower... or he will fall asleep 10 mins into a movie he chose then get agitated if I try to wake him.
>>17007890
Don't take my advice to sireus but if you realy love her ask her if it's cool you fuck someone els. If you don't love her just cheat on her
>>17010201
Find his fetish
Everyone has one
Don't listen to these fags saying cheat on him or some shit, that's fucking despicable.
Do you love him anon?
