What do you guys make of this?
You're talking to an idiot, leave them alone.
I really want her back in my life, but I don't know what to make of this. She messaged me this about a month after our break up
>>16985174
What do you mean by that?
>>16985170
>>16985171
If he truly loved you he wouldn't chase after someone else. From what I see he probably has found a quality in you that he's not fond of, that or he's fickle and doesn't want to settle down with one person. Regardless of what it is, it's obvious that he's not right for you, and you're not right for him. Just cut the cord, break up with him and distance yourself from him. It's hard, but it'll save you from dealing with this over and over.
I see a relationship that ended poorly, and people who should no longer be in contact with each other. Breaking up doesn't make feelings suddenly go away, even if you realize someone is wrong for you (unless you didn't care for them at all to begin with).
Move on, concentrate and work on yourself, stop looking for closure since you clearly won't get it from this person.
>>16985179
Here's her reasons listed. I don't want to cut this all off, I just want to fix it..
>>16985183
Sounds like she just likes someone else and she's trying to let you off easy. Sorry bud. :(
leave it, she seems like the typical "i love you but dont wanna be with you" girl, and trust me that will go nowhere
shes just leading you on
shouldn´t you be speaking in person rather than chatting via msgs?
She doesn't think we should talk as friends either. Is she just trying to move on? Or
She sounds like a person who thrives on Hollywood concepts of romance and love. Aboirt.
>>16985183
Now THAT looks like she's insecure and sees only the worst. I still recommend breaking up, but if you want save the relationship there may still be hope. You have to just sit down with her and talk. Talk it all out. And the next week? Sit down and have a long conversation again. Communication is the key to success. Comfort her, but let it be clear that her actions were wrong. Couples therapy may also help out.
>>16985195
Wait, did she leave you for a girl? Am I reading this correctly?
>>16985203
It sounds like the girl happened before the leaving, more specifically.
>>16985201
But she's with someone now, she ran to her best friend and now they're dating but it doesn't look good for them either.
Just stop, it's pathetic. Get over it.
>>16985208
I don't know the full relationship as I'm not a participant, but from what I see, it's not you, it's her. She needs to take a break from dating, and since you want her, you should wait for her. Just not having drama, or kissing, or dates, or anything like that for a while would help her see everything from new, clearer perspective. Now the challenge is getting her to just stop.
>>16985201
We're already broken up, but she messaged me out of the blue to "see how I was" but randomly told me about her feelings towards me and everything
>>16985221
Not just you and her breaking up. She needs to not date ANYONE. She needs to take a break from the whole dating scene so she can clear her head and understand she's bringing up petty nonsense and trying to rationalize running from the one she loves and who loves her.
>>16985170
He wants free, unattached pussy and he knows you are willing to give it to him if he tries hard enough.
Cut contact.
>>16985233
I haven't messaged her for about two days, should I see if I can just get it to where we're friends? I'm just worried about her falling in love with Ariana. I can't lose her.
>>16985239
Seems to me like she just got bored, man. "You're perfect in every way.", still got together with someone else. Fuck that.
>>16985239
You can be friends, but that doesn't change anything I just said. You need to tell her, face-to-face, that you think she's acting absurd and that she's caught up and confused by drama, and that you think she should take a break from the entire dating scene to regain a sense of what truly matters to her. You can be friends during that period of her taking a break, just don't go too far or do anything a bf/gf would do. Beyond that, if she refuses to even try to see the light and take a hiatus from dating, then it's pretty much hopeless, and you need to be prepared to accept that.
Having conversations like this over text seems ridiculous to me
>>16985170
Hi Lana, Stella, and Tamm,
Your prospective gf (soon-to-be poon) thinks you're an autist.
>>16985248
She doesn't know what direction her current relationship is going in, even if she doesn't break up with her, could I still sit on the side lines and just wait?
>>16985221
Fuck this manipulative bitch. She breaks up with you, then messages you out of the blue to tell her she loves you, but doesn't wanna get back together.
Find someone better.
>>16985265
I wouldn't bet on it. Maybe in like six months her current relationship will fall apart, but that's hopeful thinking. You just need to sell to her the idea of not dating, and if she's not buying, then you're fucked anon.
>>16985278
I can't try but what would I say?
>>16985175
>Why do you always turn to that reasoning?
Wow
OP
I suggest you cut contact with her. No ifs. No buts. Just move on. Dealt with people like this before and they are perfectly happy in their own bubble of ignorance.
>>16985293
>I can't try
You'd better. It's your only chance anon. Otherwise, just give up
>What would I say
There's no deception or special way to get her to see your side, you just have to let her know how it is and what your perspective looks like. Tell her that you think she's being irrational and isn't making any sense at all. Tell her that you think she's wrapped up in drama and relationships and is confused, and that you think she should just take a break from dating to regain clarity. There's no easy way, but at the same time it's simple. Sit down with her, over coffee or something, face-to-face, and let her know how you feel. Let her know that you still care for her greatly and regardless of what she does you'll support her, but that you think her further pursuing a relationship with her bestie is a mistake. Comfort her, but don't pull punches. She needs to hear what you need to say. And once more, if she continues to date her friend, then you're fucked. No level of /adv/ can change that fact, and you need to be prepared to let go.
