So I have a question for you depressed people out there.
Do any of you feel as if you get off mentally on being depressed and negative? Like as if you enjoy being in this state of mind but you just haven't consciously realized it because its all you've taught yourself to feel over the years lingering in this pool of despair but when its time to get out you'd rather drown instead because its all you've been doing for so many years.
I ask this because I had a convo with my gf and she says shes more used to being depressed more than positive and happy. So I'm thinking maybe you guys actually enjoy being in this mentality opposed to being positive about life but choose to only see the negative
>>16979688
Yes. Mental illness really is insidious. That's why it often takes professional help, and even medication, to get out of it.
Speaking from experience, I would say that you are onto something. Though I will add that it's not necessarily 'enjoyable,' as much as it is comfortable.
Personally I dont enjoy it per se, but Ive romantiziced the heart broken tortured genius I wish I was, and so I yearn situations that I know will make me deppressed.
Depression isn't enjoyable. You just get used to it. If depression is enjoyable, then it wouldn't be depression.
>>16979700
She goes to a psychiatrist but apparently isn't making any progress. She thinks them telling her to think positive is a "trick" they're trained to say but really think they don't care anything about her. Its like she tries to force the negativity on everything as if its all she knows how to do. When I asked her if she wanted to get rid of this negative thought process she couldn't even give me a straight answer
Sometimes familiar discomfort is easier to handle than change and the unknown.
>>16979709
Yeah its comfortable but after you've Been comfortable with it so long does it feel like its the only thing you can see in your point of view
>>16979741
I feel this person has gotten used to it to the point where she doesn't have any other reason for it to hold her back besides her being comfortable with it
>>16979742
How long has she been seeing them?
>>16979688
not me, but id say yes. a lot seem to wallow in their misery. i certainly did when i was younger, but i realized id rather be genuinely happy.
being 'depressed' for people on 4chan is like being 'oppressed' for people on tumblr. they WANT to be, becuase they think it defines them, it makes them special, cuz no one could ever understand how hard it is for them.
>>16979845
Not sure years I think
>>16979860
Yeah that's what I think she has cause there's moments she's super happy and if something remotely negative happens she just let's the despair take over again and I've called her out on it but she claims its a "mask" how can it be a mask if she was laughing at her own jokes and genuinely looked happy I think she's trying to convince herself its a mask
>>16979872
Perhaps she should try a new therapist or treatment
being used to it doesnt mean we enjoy it
being depressed is not a choice, and neither is how you handle it...
>>16979882
Don't think it matters man she's extremely stubborn and once she's got this thought process she juST tries to block out anything you say to her even if it made extremely good sense
>>16979880
thats something a lot of 'depressed' people claim, is that all their happy emotions are faked for the benefit of others. its kinda like that kid in middle school who claimed he was a psychic vampire, but was so good at zapping energy that no one would ever notice.
very convenient for them, lets them have their normal happy lives, but then martyrs them for being so brave and pretending to be happy when they are really sad on the inside.
>>16979896
You're really cool dude, lets all go to your house and suck your dick because of your astounding insight
>>16979860
>being 'depressed' for people on 4chan is like being 'oppressed' for people on tumblr. they WANT to be, becuase they think it defines them, it makes them special, cuz no one could ever understand how hard it is for them.
Reminds me of a guy I know irl. His self-victimization is so extreme that he has no issue acting unethically and immorally on a regular basis, such as lying, abusing other people's goodwill, being aggressive to people close to him, being lazy, etc. He uses his self-imposed victimhood as an excuse to do all sorts of things. In his view, anything positive that happens to him as an entitlement rather than a privilege and anything negative that happens to him is ALWAYS other people's fault. He expect other people to focus on his positives but he himself only focuses only the negatives of other people, even his family and friends. If other people are better or more successful than him, it's because they're privileged. If he's unsuccessful and incompetent, it's because society didn't give him a chance and is oppressing him.
>>16979911
people all have their quirks, but they seem to be getting quirkier. or perhaps the internet just brought that quirkiness to light.
Depression is the state of being overall more sad than average, over a sustained period of time.
To ask if people want to be where they are most of the time is really very tricky to disseminate.
Would I rather be depressed than suicidal? Absolutely
Would I rather be depressed than happy? I'm not sure, because I feel like the happiness is an illusion and inside it's really just more emptiness and depression, and maybe when I realize that things will be worse than if I was just generally depressed.
>>16979752
Yeah, until someone knocks some sense into you with tough love.
It seems that way because depression is the easiest option (sit do nothing and still be able to eat and access water etc) and our brain likes easy stuff. I know I used to and still do sometimes. I know now that beIng sad is experiencing emotion the same way happiness is but just in the opposite, lIke a sine wave. Sine waves go back up too and their rate of change is fastest when going back up. Stay in school.
>>16979932
so yes
>>16979932
Another thing I read is that life is really 95% mediocre and menial that if everyday was perfectly the way you anticipated as happiness your brain wouldnt be able to handle it and would find things wrong anyway. If you look around you can see it everywhere too, we really have so much but its not enough. People are still seriously considering suicide.
>>16979932
there's no way to tell but she claims all she wants is death but in convinced she's just in a cage of despair she has a key to unlock and leave behind but chooses to stay there just because she's more comfortable with it and convinced herself that's what she prefers.
>>16979966
I can't comment on what she's going through but I can tell you that I've never been happy in a romantic relationship, it doesn't seem to matter how much I want it there's always something wrong.
I hate my sexual quirks and I let it control my sexual relationships.
I tell myself I don't deserve someone with the same quirks and that I should be happy with a normal/vanilla guy. I talk myself out of opening up about my fantasies with my partners because I believe they will not accept me. I wallow in the self pity of no one understanding where I am sexually. My sexuality lives im online relationships that can never become meaningful.
I'm actually engaged, and my fiance is great, but I'm not sure he's the love of my life. We're on totally different pages sexually and it scared me, but I push it away. I'm convinced there's no one out there that will be 100% right, and if we match on so many life choice things, I better give this a try.
>>16979998
Hmm I'm curious is the cause of your depression from sexual trauma?
>>16980022
I'm not aware of any sexual trauma early in my life.
I was quietly raped by an ex, but the problem existed between that ever happened
>>16979742
Getting CBT? Helps get rid of such negative cycles.
>>16980038
CBT?
>>16980044
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
>>16980027
*before not between
>>16979688
I used to get a very sick feeling of satisfaction the more I suffered, like I was where I belonged. Ended up a homeless alcoholic sleeping in my car with no friends or family who'd talk to me and it fucking sucked and I was miserable, but at the same time felt 'right'.
Some people were meant to be miserable and I was one of those people, I thought. I still feel that way sometimes, like I want to fucking throw everything away and sleep drunk in the street like a sack of shit and quit my job and rot away in misery, but I never do.
>>16980027
Do you constantly think of that moment? Cause she had a issue with her steodad almost 10 years ago but refuses to let it go and I feel like that's the only thing holding her back
No. I feel nothing unless drunk and that doesn't work anymore as I am on pills that keep me from drinking thankfully I guess.
It's just apathy. In the worse kind of way nothing matters, you enjoy none of the things and people you once did its just fucking bland.
I'm hoping eventually I'll be "cured" at some point in the future but I doubt it. I am 25 and I have 5 more years until my brain fully matures supposedly. Hopefully by then things will be better.
Also I normally do my very best to avoid things that could make me feel or behave negatively. Why the hell would I want to feel like shit?
>maybe you guys actually enjoy being in this mentality
I wish I could enjoy things.
>>16980056
No, it was non consent in that his mom and little sister were right outside and I didn't want them to hear us, so I said no, but he did it anyway and I didn't want to make a scene so I just kept quiet, trying to set boundaries that he crossed recklessly
I've had boundary issues for a while though
>>16979688
I used to feel quite depressed all my life. Even when I was a child. I decided to go with it for a long time and even tried some edgy stuff that I won't share here.
However nothing ever filled that void except... God. Christ in specific. I tried everything else except Christ. You name it. I tried it. Some reason Christ fixed it and found me not so detestable to be unsavable or unlovable.
I no longer live with depression. It was a process of working with God and following his teachings but I am doing a lot better now and life has meaning again. Not just a superficial meaning I made my self believe in either. I'm entirely confident the Bible and Christ and the Father and the Holy Spirit are true, real and alive.
I know this might fall on deaf ears and get some negative comments but I'm being completely serious.
ehh being really depressed like straight up crying in your bed the whole day is not enjoyable at all
i definitely felt more comfy crying at home than what im doing right now, busting my ass 24/7 to get money
also like >>16980057 said, apathy is key in this.
>>16981132
Anon what do I do about a calloussed heart? I have tried before but fail to actually authentically repent then I fall back into my destructive sins/habits
>>16979688
I have this thing where I just I don't know I just love hearing sad music I love the sad lyrics I love being sad sometimes inside I have friends is like losing we were actually talking about that knots long goI don't like being sad but I do feel more comfortable being sad at them being happy but recently I've been with my boyfriend then I've actually been the happiest I've ever been it's weird because we had actually broken up and in the wow that we had broken up I was completely set all I want to hear the sad music all I wanted to do was just cause harm to myself and I didn't want l
To be happy
Depression is a serious issue that forces you to be constantly down, miserable and to have shitty judgement skills. Nobody enjoys it.
Being negative or cynical or even kind of depressive is a personality type which you may or may not enjoy.
